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  • File : 1296340331.jpg-(207 KB, 512x711, 1208840959302.jpg)
    207 KB Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:32 No.13706389  
    Do you ever regret it?
    Living when you should have died?

    I'd be lying if I said no.
    But there's no fucking way I'm admitting it to her.
    She's had enough weak men in her life, I need to be strong for her. How would I face her father if he was still alive if I couldn't offer even that for Penny?
    "Why are you still up?" I asked, still staring at the monster in the mirror.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:32 No.13706401
    If I tried to touch Penny's cheek, I'd snap her neck.
    Even my human face is cold and lifeless since I no longer have a heart.
    I am a tireless metal man-- no. I am only in the shape of a man.
    But I'm the only one that can stop Claw. I'm the only hope for this world.
    So I will do what must to keep the ones I cherish safe.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:33 No.13706408
    DOOPA DOOPA DOOP INSPECTOR GADGET!!!!
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:33 No.13706414
    I look at the metal rivets in my joints, the hydraulics just beneath the surface. I can't help but to wonder if I was better off being a deadman than a metal one. I was no better than the monsters that ruled this place now.
    "Penny, Go to your room" I say calmly as I walk out into the hallway, hardly even noticing the temperature as I don my suit and coat.
    "But...Uncle gadget." She starts.
    I turn and stare at her. My one organic eye as callous looking as the rest of me.
    "Go, to your room. Now." I repeat as I pull on my jacket and done my fedora." I've got business to do."
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:34 No.13706415
    >>13706408

    GO GO GADGET PICKLECOPTER

    >feecti revisited
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:34 No.13706418
    "Uncle..." Penny took a step into the bathroom. Her eyes were wide, filled with innocence and... was it fear? Pity? That cut deeper than anything Claw had ever done to my, my brother, or her. Even in my niece's eyes, I was something to fear.

    If it was in my power, I'd have tried to soften my face. Make it more welcoming, even as it sat atop of pyramid of pipe and brass. "Penny, it's late. You have school tomorrow. Did you do your homework?"

    "Y-yes, Uncle. It's just, I heard screams. Are you okay?"
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:34 No.13706421
    Naoki Urasawa should do an Inspector Gadget manga story (like his Pluto).
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:35 No.13706428
    I can still remember it, vaguely. What it was like to be human I mean. It becomes a little more difficult every day. The worst thing is when I can't remember, when I do something inhuman, when the facade falls away even for a moment, and I have to endure the stares and confusion of the people around me.

    I know Penny realizes what is happening. I know she is trying her best to cope, and I know she doesn't mean to despise me a little more every day as the person that was her uncle is slowly eroded into a cheap facsimile.

    But when all you have is the memory of a feeling, what else can you do but pretend?
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:35 No.13706439
    Brain, almost as enhances as I am sits by the door, staring at me like usual. I simply nod as I walk out into the night closing the door and locking it behind me.

    The streets are filled with the simpering masses. They cower under tyrannical rule and think that heroes should rise up and strike down the oppressive monsters above them. The thought makes me gag.

    They look to those of us who are strange...Us freaks to do what they can't. If they won't fight. Well...I'll do what I've always done. I'll protect my niece, my dog and my own rear-end. Let someone else parade around claiming to be the hero of the masses.

    My boots click with a steady measured beat as I make my way towards where the job was supposed to take place. My prosthetic body is getting twitchy again and I have to actively control all the damn doo-dads that have been jammed into me. If I didn't well....it would not be pretty. I need to get my systems re calibrated no doubt.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:36 No.13706444
         File1296340586.jpg-(244 KB, 1024x768, 1149806698350.jpg)
    244 KB
    Fuck yes.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:36 No.13706451
    They were smuggling weapons...shocker there. Everyone is in the arms trade these days. As soon as they saw me they tried running.

    I couldn't help but to laugh at this, they always try to run. They always forget about the arms. With a hiss of pressurized gases my arm shoots out, smashing one thug square in the back with a satisfying crunch.

    He won't be walking anytime soon...

    Two others slow down as they near a crate. One manages to jimmy the thing open and pull out a shiny new toy. A laser rifle by the looks...

    Thugs take aim and BLAM. Two shots square to the chest. My sensor system eagerly chew the data down and process the best way to handle them. As they charge for a second shot I kick on the skates. My boots explode at the soles and I go racing forward. Sparks screaming behind in a fiery shower.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:37 No.13706459
    Assholes were a lot braver now that they had their little toys on them. The guy with the lasers tried to jump to the side, his little friend went for the grenade launcher.

    Well, I'm sure it was supposed to be a grenade launcher, but my arm made sure it was nothing but a broken toy embedded in his chest.

    Laser bolts after laser bolts screeched against the ground, phoenixes intent on burning my skates and sending me crashing into crates. Not this time.
    I fling out my arms mere seconds before passing by them. All steel and speed I take them both out at the waist. I hear the grunts and snarls as their breath is knocked out and the ever pleasing crunch of something breaking inside them.

    I sadly did not account for the fourth thug in front of me with the rocket launcher....I see the back flash and Immediately start to turn. Throwing one guy in the way and retracting my arm as fast as I can. The explosion thankfully premature thanks to thug three still sends me flying.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:37 No.13706463
    Now where did I put that Inspector Gadget warforged character class...
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:38 No.13706467
    I can see him scrabbling for another round. I'm hurting where some shrapnel and concrete managed to smash me but, I can live with it.

    Get to my feet as fast as I can, ditching the wrecked skates in the process. Their razor edge inspire me all too much. One of my arms managed to get stuck in it's extended mode, the long metal cabling that acted as muscle now limp and cable like. I smile as I grab a skate and begin to twist my torso three hundred sixty degrees.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:38 No.13706470
         File1296340705.jpg-(129 KB, 700x1000, 32360cc376d9eccccb1fe41583e4ea(...).jpg)
    129 KB
    Is this how Kamen Rider is in America? Weird....
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:38 No.13706476
    By the time He's finished reloading Goon number four has a sizable chunk of titanium and steel being whipped at him faster than a major league pitcher on the mound can throw.

    It collides with his head dead on. Blood and brain spatter the pavement and the sound of a cracking skull echoes through the air with a satisfying wet CRUNCH. I pull my arm back in. Having to more or less manually crank the damn thing into place.

    I look around me, the area is littered the dead and dying and is mostly shattered boxes, bodies and expensive weapons. None of the other goons stayed around long enough to actually join in on the fun but, they did leave some clues...

    I limp over to a nearby crate, one of my leg servos is malfunctioning terribly and I can feel a trickle of pain racing across it with each movement. It's annoying for the time being but, it looks like I'm not going to be able to play with the boys again till that's fixed.

    On a broken plank there is an insignia I know all too well. Claws men were the ones shipping them into the city. They had to have known I was coming...It doesn't add up in my addled CPU however and I simply grab the trophy before turning on my internal Bluetooth.

    "Brain..." I mumble aloud playing with the piece of wood."I'm out on the docks. Pinpoint the single and send Sunny here ASAP. I'm going to need a lift home boy."
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:39 No.13706480
         File1296340760.jpg-(177 KB, 500x406, Not even one.jpg)
    177 KB
    HEY LOOK GUYS I CAN TURN A KIDS' SHOW GRIMDARK AM I COOL YET
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:39 No.13706485
    My contact with the FBI is a man I only know by "Chief." He gives me all the information I need to find my next targets, and he receives all the credit every time a Claw target's taken out. I, of course, get none of the recognition.

    I had made sure we got that clear the moment I woke up in the hospital. I died in that car bomb.

    It would be easier for my work, thought it made keeping Penny a legal hassle.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:40 No.13706494
    Sunny gets me home no questions asked. He's kind enough to not even charge a fair. Guy's been a trooper ever since I ended up this was really.

    I stumble into the apartment and immediately feel my leg give out. Like a tin tree I come crashing down with a heavy clatter and thud. Sitting in front of me Brain looks at me with what can only be disapproval. His augmented body gleaming in the light. Electronic eyes as lifeless as mine and yet just as easily convey how he must feel.

    "What?" I grumble as I try to get back to my feet, only to have my blasted arm unfurl like a ribbon."They were smuggling weapons."

    He stares all the same and with a wheezy sigh grabs me with steel jaws and drags me into my room...Well really more of a chop shop these days. Grunting he somehow hauls me into what I call a bed these days. A casket like thing that has hard points in it to allow for me to recharge and sleep at least a little. It's systems immediately hook me in and I can feel a little life return my artificial limbs.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:41 No.13706498
    As I drift in an out of sleep I see metal spiders crawling over my body. Probing it and making sure I'm still alive. The casket will keep me going at least for a little while longer...
    Brain is nearby most likely over-seeing all the systems checks. After all that's what he was built for. My faithful dog cum doctor. He'd seen me in worse shape probably and god knows I've walked out of worse though it doesn't feel like it.

    As morning dawns I come out of my stupor and test my limbs. They are patched up to the best of Brains abilities but, without the proper equipment it's a temporary fix at the best of times. I stumble out into hallway ans see penny standing there holding my jacket. Scorch marks and laser holes dot the tattered thing and tears are welling on her face...I stop and stare...so much for the charade.

    "I...I can explain!" I stammer out as my leg gives out again causing me to come down in a heap.

    "You lied!" she screams, throwing the coat at me and looking at me like I'm the freak I am."You said you were done trying to be a hero!" Her voice is cracking and she's shaking like a leaf. Brain is in the background staring at us with metal eyes...

    "Penny-" I start only to stop as she slams the door to her room shut. I must have blinked out for a second...My systems keep doing that...She must have thought I was being a fool and playing dumb when instead I had simply froze up.

    "I don't have a choice.." I finish finally as I haul myself up and drag my tin hide out the door and over to the car. I crawl in and slam the door. It starts automatically and knows exactly where to go. It's a piece of me after all. It knows who I've got to go and talk with. On the passengers seat is the wooden plank from last night. Brain must have been kind enough to put it there for me.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:42 No.13706511
    The car races down the streets Like it has a pro at the wheel instead of a chump. I'm not even conscious really , like nearly everything else about me. If I'm not around it could in theory run itself. just keep operating even if I died right then and there.

    A few hours later I'm at the Center. Its' an intelligence bureau office, The Chief doesn't waist time with formalities and instead has me rushed to where the mess began. Unceremoniously they start working on me. Disconnecting all but my vitals as they overhaul my body...

    "You're looking good Gadget." He says walking into the room. A pipe is crammed between teeth and his hairline is slowly retreating.

    "It's Gad-Jey." I reply without moving my lips. A speaker somewhere in the background carries my voice over annoyingly enough.

    "Whatever." He says in a snippet of annoyance. "We are reviewing the data from last night. Good work on getting rid of those weapons, we are running the cover story now. As for well..." He gestures with a hand at my inert body. "This...We are giving you a total overhaul. You can't go without a regular check-up Gad-Jay"

    He draws my name out in a snarky tone. If I could grind my teeth I would. I see the techs playing around with my insides, none of them seem concerned that I'm a living person and not just a tin man however. I see one smack on of my servos with a wrench as he tries to free it from it's place.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:42 No.13706517
    "Alright Chief" I reply as I watch another tech rudely yank off one of my feet. "I'll try to be more punctual about this fun time."

    Chief simply gnaws on his pipe like a dog on a bone. He's mulling over something I can tell that without running over a biometric scan. He's probably debating weather or not he should let me get up and get out or if he wants to send me on one of his personal errands.

    "Watch your Niece Gadget." He says carefully. "Just..watch her like a hawk for a bit. We'll take care of Claw, she needs her uncle right now." His voice carried over something that made me internally shiver. He knew something that I didn't...that was never a good sign.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:43 No.13706521
    How, precisely, is this /tg/?
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:43 No.13706523
    >> grimdark Writefag 01/04/10(Mon)16:04 No.7426665

    >>7426509

    By the time the techs were done it was well into the day. Penny was at school and brain would be charging. Which meant the house would be empty effectively. So, I plugged in the directions to a nearby diner instead. It was one that I had been going to since before the accident and had come to call a second home. The Car had no issues with this thankfully and within fifteen minutes I was there and in a booth.

    A waitress. A young thing just out of School most likely came over and with a smile asked if I wold like some coffee. I couldn't help but to say yes. It reminded me of Martha when we had first met. It had been in a little diner just like this one...I payed on the spot and was handed a nice fresh cup.

    I eagerly drank down the steaming liquid, it barely had a taste thanks to a mostly artificial mouth. I had a sense of taste that really only could be stirred up by something as powerful as Tabasco sauce or something near boiling. But, what little I could taste was well worth a nice tip. I enjoyed the atmosphere of fry-cooks and truckers, watching the masses enjoy a hearty meal or talk about the weather.

    The regulars as usual said hello and bid me a good day. I returned the favor as normal and found myself watching the news by the time it was all said ans done. It was following the latest stories on Some group of kids called 'runners' youngsters that liked to get into mischief spreading graffiti and vandalizing Offices ran by the government. A group of suspects flashes on the screen. One of the faces sticks out a little bit to much and my cybernetic eye immediately goes into fits as it runs the data through my brain.

    My coffee cup shatters as it hits the floor moments after I'm running out the door, towards the car.
    >> ITT: Grimdark gadget. Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:44 No.13706532
    I flung the door wide open as I charged inside. I was greeted by hazy blue pipe smoke and the Chief reclining in my Lazyboy.

    "You don'y listen well do you Gadget?" He replied somehow while smoking his pipe. He stared at me almost bemused by the situation.

    "You knew!" I hissed as I stormed through the small apartment searching for what I hoped was missing. As I slammed open the door to her room I heard him laugh.

    'Of course! Think about, how could we not?" He called back like a matador taunting a bull.

    I ignored the smart remarks as I tore through the room. Opening everything that I could find. Drawers flew hazardously through the air and her closet was flung open. Once satisfied I returned to my Living room, my face set like a statue as I looked at the Chief.

    "Then why didn't you tell me?" I snapped as he finally removed himself from my chair. Once again he laughed. His pace was slow and deliberate as he walked out my front door.

    "You're supposed to be the inspector I thought." He replied with a final laugh as he stepped outside.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:44 No.13706533
    >>13706521

    8-bit dystopia. Basically /tg/ took every childhood cartoon, videogame, and movie and mashed it into a grimdark parody of itself for a campaing setting.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:45 No.13706538
    Sitting in the car awaiting me was Brain, the Chief was already long gone and the only thing that even hinted at his presence was the reeking stench of pipe tobacco that filled the apartment now. Without a second thought I climbed in and Glanced at my watch.
    "Go go gadget homing signal." I said plainly. The wristwatch beeped a few times and my vision blurred as a map of the city became apparent to me. Several icons blinked into existence, three of them were Brain, the car and I.
    A fourth Icon, a glowing P showed where penny was. The car roared to life as I focused on that point. I hammered the gas down and went speeding out the driveway. Next to Brain wagged his steel tail eagerly. After all for all his oil and circuits he was still a dog at heart.
    We crossed into downtown without a second thought. Wherever she was it was in a rough part of town.
    The car eventually pulled up and gracefully parallel parked near a rather rundown bar. Brain was out of the door first with me following close behind.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:46 No.13706546
    Brain sits outside sniffing around the place as I walk up to the guy standing outside the door, a big biker type of guy, sunglasses, leather jacket, the works. I waltz up without a second thought and put a hand on the door only for him to put a meaty paw on my shoulder.

    “Hold it buddy. You ain’t got clearance for here.” He rumbles out with a voice like an engine on low throttle. I look up with a trademark smile and play the fool.

    “Well, you see.” I begin letting my voice get a little nasally. “My niece is in their when she’s supposed to be at school. And I don’t want her wasting her time with a bunch of hooligans.”
    The biker just stares; He’s not buying the act. I really don’t want to start trouble quite yet but…

    “No dice buddy.” He grumbles giving me a shove. I roll with it and take a step back looking offended.

    “I disagree.” Before he knows it a metal fist is flying at his jaw. With a crunch like glass his jaw gives way and his eyes go blank. He crumples in a heap on the ground as little blood from a broken nose accents his face like makeup.

    I unceremoniously kick the door off its hinges, shedding light on a cesspool of drugs and other illicit activities.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:48 No.13706571
    Didn't this happen already? I'm pretty sure I read this thing some months/years ago.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:49 No.13706574
    >>13706571
    Correct, this is copypasta.
    >> Titanium Man 01/29/11(Sat)17:49 No.13706575
    I wrote a grimdark Inspector Gadget once where Dr. Claw downloaded his mind into Gadget's body, got a new face and beard, and proceeded to terrorize the city. Got killed when someone hit him with a power line. Hilarious in retrospect!
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:49 No.13706579
    I unceremoniously kick the door off its hinges, shedding light on a cesspool of drugs and other illicit activities.

    The bar ceased its various activities, except one small group in the back. A gang of younger kids were having a good time. My cybernetics pulsed as the homing beacon led to them. Even with the stares I was getting they ignored me. My data stream pointed directly at them. Without a thought I marched towards them, fighting down a rush of anger as I saw my Niece.

    She was dressed in something that was somewhere between a mini-skirt and what a stripper would wear while working. Beneath her was a young upstart with his nose pierced, jeans ripped and a hair that was liable to poke someone’s eye out. My systems immediately registered him as one of the kids from the News bulletin, along with several others gathered at the table.
    I stormed over my servos hissing with anger. Penny caught a glimpse of me, her face was priceless. She was whispering something to the lapdog underneath her as I finally came to a halt. The group fell silent at for once in their lives most likely and as she scrambled off I had to violently resist the urge to knock out the punk she had been using as a chair as I glimpsed a hand sneak out from her skirt.

    “Get in the car.” I started my voice crackling a little as binary slipped in from somewhere.
    My niece stared at me disgusted.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:50 No.13706590
         File1296341432.jpg-(33 KB, 450x490, dr-gang-dr-claw.jpg)
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    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)17:54 No.13706631
    Do I regret it?
    Not being honest with Penny to protect her?
    No I don't.
    Not paying closer attention to her and keeping her on the straight an narrow?
    Yes.

    As I sat in the car I and close my eyes to process what to do, I feel a sudden rush of pain.

    Servos grind to a halt. I look up once more. I am no longer in the car.

    Back in front of the mirror, my monster looking back at me dead in the eyes.

    The clock behind me reads that only a second has passed.

    Penny still there in the doorway.

    A Dream? Or something else?

    Do I ever regret it?

    "Penny, please go to bed. You have school in the morning."
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)17:59 No.13706671
    A winner is you.
    >> teka 01/29/11(Sat)18:00 No.13706688
    >not bad.
    >anyone want this dump to continue with the semi-arcanotech grim Robocop known as Black Engine?
    >"EVEN IN DEATH I STILL SERVE...IN THE METROPOLITAN POLICE"
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:00 No.13706695
    Not Grimdark enough.

    Gadget and Penny should have some sort of wife husbandry relationship.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:02 No.13706716
    >>13706695
    There's good Grimdark and then there's absurd, stupid Grimdark.

    This piece deals more with Gadget losing touch with the remnants of his humanity and his fears of losing touch with Penny as his niece. Turning it into something sexual and perverse like that would be too "human".
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:02 No.13706717
    >>13706695
    It was Some good Copy pasta. with a New ending.
    Trippy.
    Three of five shogun blasts
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:04 No.13706737
    >>13706716
    Yeah, you think way too much of this fanfiction, buddy.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:05 No.13706746
         File1296342316.jpg-(19 KB, 320x299, TNO.jpg)
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    "Oh, uh.. Alright".
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:07 No.13706763
    >>13706746

    Dear diary...
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)18:07 No.13706764
    >>13706688
    Sorry don't have it.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:10 No.13706803
    >>13706737
    The general theme of cyborgs and their humanity is what interests me. The fact that it uses an already established canon/series is irrelevant, or just makes it more interesting as its an alternative interpretation of the general premise.

    Alternative continuities for various fiction is nothing new. Fanfiction is just the same thing but on an amateur level.
    >> teka 01/29/11(Sat)18:12 No.13706819
    The hand quivered for a second; a spasm of nerves and cables. It flexed, and one of the cables actually snapped. A needle somewhere jumped in the dark. It was followed by a chorus of needles, now pulsing slowly to an unworldly beat.

    Shelly smirked. "It's alive." she said, and switched to the iMac, now running on UPS. "again." She felt both relieved and a little sad.

    The power was out again, but she could already hear her interns cranking the generator outside. Lights would be restored before long. Meanwhile they only had chemical lamps and the flickering glow of the computer screens around the room. Most of the diagnostics programs run on laptops, but the resurrection routine was still running on the iMac she wrote it on.

    The Black Engine strained at the metal bands holding to the table. It moaned wordlessly at first. Tiny crackles of electricty burst from it's neckbolts. Somehow it found it's voice, which came out like the crackling of dead leaves. More needles jumped. The bar wouldn't hold if he flexed just one time. They both knew it.

    "..let me die this time..."

    Shelly peered down at the A-wave. The lights flickered on for a second. Someone yelled "almost!" from outside. Unpaid interns. She took off her glasses and wiped them on her lapel. He was always so sweet when he first came up.

    "I can't let you die, Engine. I just blew all my grant money on an improvement to your spine. This time you won't get your head knocked off so easily."

    "..my head...."

    "We found it in the bay. I paid a guy. Look, Ashmelech is still out there."

    "..shmelech? My head..?" Engine worked his jaw slowly. His red eyes blinked.
    >> teka 01/29/11(Sat)18:13 No.13706828
    >>13706819
    More needles jumped. A laptop on the far side of the room flickered to life. Adrenaline levels (and fluid pressure- it wasn't exactly blood anymore) were rising in a way she'd seen a few times before. She replaced her glasses and reached for the syringe of klonazapam nervously.

    "Quit spazzing. I got it on good this time. And I optimized the cabling on your lower back and thighs while I had you down. This time your'e going to take him. I swear. I've got you up to 8 tons dead-lift. I haven't tested it yet, but the diag looks really good..."

    She trailed off.

    "..."

    "Engine?"

    "ASHMELECH. WHERE."

    Shelly fumbled for the padlock on the chest restraint. "We think in the village.. the docks. Near where you fought the vampire cult.."

    Too late, the Black Engine burst the wristcuffs at the chains. The laptop at the head of the slab was beeping now. A 3-d wiregrid of his pheochromocytoma began to show hot spots. He clawed at the sensor cables. Laptops flickered red with each snapped wire. She pulled the padlock off just in time for him to toss the chest-bar aside. He reached up and snapped the leg restraints. The fresh cabling in his back ripped free from hydraulic hoses. Green and red chemical fluids like hissing snakes spattered the room and the front of Shelly's labcoat and then went dead.

    "THIS TIME BLACK ENGINE WILL SMASH."

    He stood up, shakily at first. He turned his gleaming head, gory with meta-derm and pulsing chemical tubing. The silvery gleam of his reinforced spine and the broadstaple stitching that was used to reattach his head glinted in the glow of the computer screens. It turned. His red eyes scanned the room.
    >> teka 01/29/11(Sat)18:13 No.13706835
    >>13706828
    He turned to the basement walkout and tore the door off the hinges. Outside the storm howled. Shelley heard a yelp from one of the interns. How many doors had she replaced this year?

    And then he was gone.

    She took off her glasses and turned to the computer screen again. There was a tear in her eye. She didn't want the interns to see.

    "Go get him, tiger." she whispered.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:23 No.13706925
         File1296343399.jpg-(75 KB, 1280x720, 1263599088836.jpg)
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    Apparently every crunch is satisfying.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:33 No.13707056
    Here is some old writefagging I wrote about a year ago. I hope it is an enjoyable read.

    The door creaked quietly while opening. The two persons entered a long corridor with several lockers lining the walls. The lockers had a subtle metallic gleam, just as the tall man who walked past them. At least he did when one took a very close look at the small microphone-like device pointing out between two of his trenchcoat’s buttons. The other person was a young girl, roughly at the age of ten or eleven with blond hair and two rather puffy ponytails showing to the sides of her head.

    She wore a red shirt with a white bar roughly at the middle and normal jeans, seemingly just another one of many young children. He wore a white-beige trenchcoat and Fedora hat which could have been props for a Film-Noir Detective movie. And a detective he was. Inspector Gadget was about to face one of the less simple problems of day-to-day crimefighting.

    The annual parent’s day at Penny’s school.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:34 No.13707067
    >>13707056
    He sighed and retracted the small mic back behind his coat while Penny ran forward to greet a few of her friends. They who stood near one of the lockers. There were two girls and three boys, all roughly her age. Sonar scans showed no hidden weapons or other dangerous items on their bodies. One could never be too sure…

    Penny started chatting with them while he quietly observed the group. One girl seemed like she would become some kind of trendsetter or maybe cheerleader with her long hair and well-selected fashion. Maybe she was the leader of their little clique?

    “I can’t stand Mister Crowley! He always looks at me like I’m some kind of dumb bimbo when I say something in class!” The girl said after a sigh.

    “Yeah he is kinda… conservative in his views.” Penny remarked.

    “Umm… what’s conservative mean, Penny?” One of the other girls asked her. Ah Penny, always using words that were too old for her age. Or maybe SHE was already too old for her age? He stepped forward to diffuse the situation.

    “Oh, that means he might still cling to old thoughts and opinions. At least the guy on American gladiators said that last night on the TV, right Penny?” He hoped she would get the hint.

    “Um Uncle we don’t watch that show, at least I don’t.” Penny answered. She was still a child and so subtle hints were sometimes still too subtle for her. Or maybe she CHOSE to pretend to not notice his “don’t act all too mature” nudge? She was so smart after all…
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:35 No.13707079
    >>13707067
    “So that’s your Dad? He looks, like, so old!” One of the boys exclaimed while opening his arms in a wide arc, probably to illustrate his point.

    “Jeremy… um… Penny doesn’t have a Dad. That’s her uncle.” The girl said while rubbing her neck with obvious discomfort. Arkward silence followed. Penny’s eyes literally fell to the ground together with her look. Oh hell, this day had started so well…

    “Jeremy! You and your parents can go to room five now. Penny, you come to me.” A woman shouted over the other end of the corridor.

    They left the group with a deathly silence and marched towards their calling. Penny’s shoulders were slightly low and her gait lacked the usual spunk and energy she usually showed. She was still so delicate and vulnerable. Not just just to bullets but also to words. He felt a cold sting in his chest. Maybe the hydraulics had a small loop? Or was it something else, something long forgotten?

    Forgotten, or only buried? A part deep inside him yearned it to be the latter. The self diagnostic program gave no results. Penny’s vitals were a little lower than usual. He wanted to say something, anything, just to make her feel better. To lure her attention away from the harsh truth that her parents had died to a car-bomb.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:36 No.13707091
    >>13707079
    He tried to open his mouth but felt a cold lump stuck in his throat. He wanted to speak to her, give her comfort, warmth and safety. Things he had long forgotten. But how could one convey what one does no longer understand? The only sound he managed to make was a small cough which landed in his gloved hands. Oh, the gloves. Those little things made from real leather and enhanced to stretch and open without tearing. And to close without any scar or mark after opening.

    Unlike the scars in Penny’s heart and the ones on his body.

    The door loomed infront of them like a silent reminder of something he couldn’t think of. A woman, probably a teacher by her looks, waved them in and closed the door. They sat down on two prepared chairs infront of a wooden desk. There were no traps. He had doublechecked.

    “Penny I would like to talk to you about your current year and about your grades.” The woman began. Gadget just nodded as the teacher threw him a gaze.

    “Your grades are pretty good, and, if I might add, you could even get into a special school for gifted children or skip a few classes with them!” She exclaimed with an honest smile. Or was it an unreal smile? He couldn’t trust that woman. Not after all the lies and half-truths, threats and unpleasant truths hidden behind smiles, visible like a horrid monster that hid behind a silk curtain.

    “I think Penny should stay in her current class, Miss Morgan.” He sternly stated.

    “I believe you should consider your Uncle’s suggestion but make your own decision, Penny.” Ah, yes. The “you are not her real parent so you have nothing so say” fact, hidden behind a subtle wording and an even subtler movement of the shoulders. Too subtle for Penny.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:36 No.13707098
    >>13707091
    “I want to stay here, Miss Morgan. All of my friends are here and I wouldn’t want to miss them cause of skipping class. Or even school. Besides, we couldn’t really afford to move anywhere else. We barely brake even right now and other flats would be even more expensive. My uncle has certain… needs that aren’t cheap.” She said with enthusiasm and decisiveness. Just like her mother. Perhaps it hadn’t been too subtle. Her friends… well at least what few friends were left. What few he hadn’t driven away with his shrewdness.

    “Well, that is very considerate of you Penny, but this is YOUR future we’re talking about here. You wouldn’t want to miss an opportunity like this!” Morgan’s tone became more urgent. It was obvious she wanted Penny to take her side in this matter.

    “I believe Penny has a right to make her own decisions, don’t you think, Miss Morgan? She should do what is best for her and her life.”

    He was tempted, oh so tempted, to call her Missus. And he wanted to use sarcasm so bad. But he had to restrain himself. As always. But he couldn’t keep himself from mimicking her own words. Perhaps just to spite her? Or was there a hidden meaning his subconscious understood while he didn’t?

    “Sure, but-“ The teacher began but Penny cut her off: “I think we should be going now. Uncle had a car accident and he wants to a lotion for his kneecap. He doesn’t say it, cause he’s a Gentleman, but just sitting here like this hurts his prosthetic leg like mad. Can we go now Miss Morgan?” Her voice was so childlike and pure and honest. And so fake as well. He noticed that while the teacher didn’t.

    The teacher’s face was priceless, a memory he would etch into his photographic memory for eternity. Surprise, the realization of being “caught” by a mere child, and her red cheeks of shame. Priceless. They left the room and Penny closed the door.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:37 No.13707103
    >>13707098
    “You shouldn’t lie to people like this Penny.” He whispered into her ear while holding his gloved hand in a comical and obvious way. Old habits die hard.

    “Well, its not really a lie. Your knee does hurt every now and then and it is prosthetic, right?” She whispered back while walking the corridor.

    “But… you know that woman only wanted to help you.” He had to force himself to say it. The woman had seemed so… wrong. Fake. Almost like a metal kneecap. Only in a mental and not a physical way.

    “I don’t need help. I only need you. And besides, she should have helped herself when she was my age. Everyone knows she had an abortion when she was 15 and only got her teachers job through relations and string-pulling.”

    Oh god, that young girl knew about such controversial and life-changing things. Was there nothing innocent in this evil world anymore? They kept walking while whispering things to each other with held hands before their mouths. It was almost comical. SO comical, in fact, that a lot of people were looking at them when they left the building.

    They both looked around in a very obvious manner and then snuck to their car in an even funnier one. More people began looking. They quickly entered their car and started laughing. They laughed for so long he lost any connection with time. Then they slowly stopped and started driving home. He needed a “lotion” for his knee after all. Lubricant for the joints had to be inserted via a small straw and a round opening on the leg. Of course he would do that himself.

    The teachers look had shown the accusation all too clearly. Pedophile. Monster. Abuser. Murderer of Parents. Abomination. Everything but the second and last was wrong.

    Penny seemed oblivious to his thoughts and started humming an old melody. Her mother had sung it to her as a lullaby when she had been little.

    Oh well, maybe the day wasn’t so bad after all…
    >> CAT IN A TIE 01/29/11(Sat)18:37 No.13707108
    >If I tried to touch Penny's cheek, I'd snap her neck.

    This is the only quibble I have with the story. It just sort of feels tossed in for the sake of baw.

    Not to mention.. anything that sophisticated would have the ability to restrain itself.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:39 No.13707126
    >>13707103
    This was supposed to show how quite challenging everyday life can be.

    It was an old building, that much was for sure. A long and thin wire extended through the air and moved into an open window. It looked a bit like a small flashlight or a miniature camera, perhaps even a dentists pocket lamp. It stretched into a long and thin wire which moved downwards in a snakelike pattern. It ended in-between two buttons of an old white-beige trench coat. Rain pellets dropped off the rim of a wet Fedora hat. The man could have been a film Noir Detective. And that he was, but with a twist.

    The room was clear except for a few orderly stacked crates across one of the 4 walls. Three men with concealed weapons sat around a table playing cards. One of them threw down his cards in an angry gesture and leaned back on the table. Another one took a puff of his cigar and regarded his cards. Nothing else was visible on the catwalk that stretched into a small office at the other corner of the building. The office was at the height of a 3rd story floor, but the space beneath it was free for cargo and crates.

    Fino, Gadget’s dog and ever loyal companion, stood beside him. It was a yellow mutt with a round red nose and a nondescript bracer around its neck. Fino was actually an incredibly enhanced creature with humanlike levels of intelligence. It had been a normal dog before CLAW used him in a set of experiments to create cyborg animal soldiers. After all, what military guard would raise an eyebrow at a stray dog sniffing at a wall 40 meters away from him? And what guard would raise a brow when his head was gone due to a small skullgun mounted within one of the dogs glass-eyes?
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:39 No.13707138
    >>13707126
    He remembered that mission. It had been one of his runs before the… incident. He remembered the guards surrendering after tear gas and flashbangs left them defenceless. He remembered the tanks of yellow see-through liquid in which rows upon rows of lifeless, dead bodies hovered. Cats, Dogs, Birds and other small animals, all dead and split open in various degrees. A dog with a halfed skull, a few wires sticking out of its openly tapped brain. A cat with its legs missing at the stumps while the stumps were still moving occasionally, erratically, like a chicken with its head cut off. And the huge containers filled with various fleshy remains and cut bodyparts reappeared before his mental eye. Damn the photographic memory!

    All of them had been dead. Killed in various ways, studied and then thrown away when they had outlived their usefulness. Or turned into failed experiments. Taken away from their loved ones, abducted, stolen. Cut off arms, legs, eyes with their stalks still attached, whole brains with bits of CPU-like items stuck in them, and other things.

    His entire body shuddered for a moment. Compensation of the internal heat regulator? A memory of a long gone emotion? His body could withstand colds that even Siberia failed to produce.

    And the dog on the table. A mut, a mixed-race street dog. His mental eye showed the surgeons with their bloody scalpels, their surprised faces behind their masks. And the dog. Opened with several pincers keeping open a long cut among the spine. Some kind of metallic spinelike thing lying on a table, ready to be implanted. He snapped. The flashes of his gun, the dropping bodies of men and women without ethics. Pictures of the past.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:40 No.13707146
    >>13707138
    And there it was, a poor thing with an open skull, a small plastic tube on the table nearby, ready to be put into its skull as a gun, and the blood, blood everywhere. And the dog was awake. It whined in a low tone. He aimed his gun at the unfortunate creature. It wouldn’t survive long with all of its digestive tracts and inner organs except the lung and heart removed. But he couldn’t bring himself to it. The poor thing. lying there in pain, they hadn’t even given him full tranquilization, only a local one. His body shuddered again.

    Fino licked his gloved hand, just as he had licked his naked hand back then. He had stayed with the dog all the time when his team came in and started cleaning everything up. Sorting the bodies, the prisoners and any evidence, including tapes. Tapes of the operations. He had remained with the dog and stayed with him when he had been given a full-body tranquilization shot. He’d made soothing noises while the poor thing whined and licked his hand while the other hand stroked the dog’s still intact side of the head.

    “I won’t let you die, I promise Claw will pay for this.” He had told the dog when its eyes slowly closed.

    He looked down. Fino stood there and had, after sensing his friends discomfort, begun licking his hand. Such a loyal and smart dog. He sighed and started stroking his head. Such a good dog. He started walking into the warehouse. CLAW’s mercs were waiting.

    “I won’t let you die either.” A machine-voice spoke behind him as the bleak twilight of the warehouse consumed him.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:41 No.13707155
    >>13707146
    He calmly walked towards the table where the Mercenariess sat. They didn't even notice him until he stood right next to them. One of them was looking at his cards and angrily exclaimed:

    “Man I’m so fucking broke right now it ain’t even funny. Can’t get any worse now!”

    “Mind if I give it a try?” Gadget picked up the cards and held them up. The first one, apparently an old Russian ex-OMON, was the first to reach for his pistol. He was also the first to land on the ground, thanks to the reception of a metallic fist to the face. The second one started shouting something in Philippino while pushing himself away from the table and upwards. His head was slammed through the table before he could stand up. The third one’s face changed within nanoseconds from surprise to anger to fear. It also changed to red due to a gold old iron left hook. He flew several metres and onto his back.

    “Hey man we can make a deal, alright?” Gadget started walking towards the man who kept shuffling backwards. He always wondered why they never stood up or rolled to their belly and tried to run, like sprinters do in the Olympics. Probably fear.

    “Look man, I know a lotta things you don’t so lets trade ok?” Sweat was dropping from his face. And pure dread. Gadget had to hold himself to back to not enjoy it. Relish it, just like CLAW relished his power. He stood above the man who had the wall behind and an aggravated cyborg before himself.

    “He-He will kill me if I say it, I swear!” Gadget grabbed him by the throat and hoisted him up against the wall. His feet no longer touched the ground.

    “I swear to the Holy Marie I know nothing! God please you’re a human too you can’t just ignore that!” His pleas fell on deaf ears. It would be so easy to crush his windpipe, his neck and his limbs. It would be so easy to just slam his skull into the wall and end the two other unconscious mercs as well. So easy. So tempting….
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:42 No.13707167
    >>13707155
    “I swear HE will kill me! He-He’s got my family! I swear! Please just let me go! Help me! He’s got my wife and son!” The rest was too hard to understand among the sobbing. Tears started rolling down the mans cheeks among pearls of sweat. He was not lying. The stress levels of his scanner unit said so. The broken and scared look in his eyes said so. Gadget’s own heart, though cybernetic, said so. He felt an odd pain in the chest. Penny… was she safe? Was she ok? Was she able to deal with the stress, the fear, the loneliness of growing up without loving, caring parents?

    Would this man break without a loving wife and child?

    He saw the man before him changing from a faceless goon into a sobbing wreck of a father in seconds. It was so easy to forget they had lives too. Maybe this man would hesitate to shoot Gadget with his weapons? Maybe he would try to wriggle out of CLAW’s vice-like grip? The chances were slim. CLAW had agents everywhere. No one was safe. Nothing was sacred. Not even children. Not even Penny.

    A body slumped to the floor and fell to the side. It clutched its throat with one hand and tried to move away with the other. The body was still alive. The deep prints of a metallic gauntlet would vanish soon, just as the paleness and sweat. Gadget heard a groan from behind and saw an arm slowly grab into the air like in a drunken stupor.

    “You will all testify. The police can protect you. I can protect you. But only if you testify. Only if you tell us everything you know about CLAW. He is NOT almighty. I am the best proof.” He looked at the crying man before him. He was pointing at something. At the boxes. The groaning man at the table was slowly dragging himself away from the boxes. Something was wrong…
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:43 No.13707180
    >>13707167
    The boxes were no longer there. Instead, there was a small cloud of smoke and wooden fragments. Of course, it only looked that way when one could see and process things as fast as Inspector Gadget could. And, of course, one could only narrowly evade the invisible Laser beam and plastic shards when one was as FAST as Inspector Gadget.

    He was already 3 steps away to the left when the boxes revealed their secret: It was fast, vicious and he could not yet define its shape. It was already 4 feet in front of him. It was TOO fast. Some kind of metallic thing raced by Gadget’s head as he stepped aside and began to run away. Yes, running away was often the best idea. He would not do something fancy or pretty-looking. No, he would do what worked well. Fancy things were for Hollywood.

    Fancy things got you killed.

    And so he ran and shot his arms forward to grab onto the doorframe. The door was closed and, suddenly, made of titanium, but he could still suck his hands onto the frame. And then he sucked himself closer. Barely away from more thin shards. He began running up the wall and, while using his initial pull’s momentum, hammered his arms outward and to the sides. The arms were at about 20 feet length each by then. He was at the roof and jumped away from it. The thing was straight behind him.

    He caught a glimpse a cold metal frame, without a trench coat, without fancy clothing, without the gadgets that gave him an advantage over normal humans. It was bristling with weaponry and surprisingly lithe. Its frame was thin and light, even lighter than his own, and faster as well.

    It appeared to have some sort of gun mounted onto its arm, and several more all over the torso and legs. They were small studs, maybe as big as the ones used on soccer shoes, and all of them fired tiny plastic shards at him at disturbingly high speed.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:43 No.13707183
    >>13707108
    I think it means he doesn't want to risk it.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:44 No.13707189
    >>13707180
    It had less stopping power and more penetration. It was not a classic gun because classic guns used gun powder and had recoil. This thing didn’t. And it was so fast…
    More small shards flew past his head and clean through his right shoulder. Damage reports started coming in. Right activator damaged but still functional. Life support number 3 out of order. Shoulder joint 2 leaking lubricant. 91% overall efficiency remaining.

    He hauled himself off to the left and pounced against the wall, ready to jump again. It was almost too late. More shells flew past him and where he had originally intended to land. Instead an instinct told him to change flight and move away at the last moment. Good choice. The thing was pitch black and smooth to the core. Its other arm seemed to have some kind of blade or attachment mounted in. It remained at some kind of distance while firing small wires into the ceiling. Then it pulled itself up on these wires.

    The groaning man below had only witnessed some kind of blur flying around. 1.3 seconds of movement were a bit much for the human brain to proceed so quickly.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:45 No.13707202
    >>13707189
    Gadget unleashed his first gadget. A small rocket propelled punch-glove exited his open hat and flew at the thing. Shards penetrated it and ripped through it but, due to little stopping power, failed to stop it. The thing registered the glove flying waaaaaaaaaaaaaay past its head and continued shooting. At least until one heartbeat later the thing fell backward due to one of its strings being pushed into the wall by the glove.

    His left arm extended quickly and hammered straight into its face. It hung there for a moment like a puppet with its strings untied. And then something odd happened. His arm didn’t come back. It fell down to the ground, cut off by some kind of laser. An invisible laser. Gadget switched his vision to include the ultra-violet and voila! There it was: A clean beam coming at his face. Too bad Gadget was neither slow nor sluggish. And an arm could be replaced.

    He grabbed the catwalk beneath him and pulled himself closer. The servos of his right arm groaned in protest but did their duty. The thing was still attempting to comprehend a new plan. Apparently flying gloves of doom were not programmed into its database.

    Small pops could be heard and the thing fell past gadget onto the ground. That was the time to strike! Instead of simply jumping at it he ripped off one of the metal tubes that held the gangway on the roof and threw it at the thing.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:47 No.13707210
    >>13707202
    The first item that impacted the thing was a metal tube with several small holes in it. After that came an angry fist of steel. The cyborg was flung backwards and onto its steal-clad back. Gadget Stood above the metal monster which, even with all ingenuity in the world, had not been able to foresee his outlandish fighting style. It would, however, be able to tear through a group of cops or infantrymen with ease.

    “And now, one machine has triumphed over the other. How interesting.” A voice cackled. It came from a part of the brickwall with was apparently a disguised screen. And a huge one at that. It showed CLAW and his, well, name-giving iron prosthetic claw. And the cat. Oh god, how he hated that creature.

    “So Inspector Gadget, It seems my scientists have failed to plan ahead for… getting knocked over.” He snarled with a hint of sarcasm and disappointment in his voice.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:47 No.13707216
    >>13707210
    Gadget looked down at the robot. It was fast and deadly. And unable to get up. With all the weaponry and guns attached to it no one had thought to give it hands. And its hooks had already been cut off by the machine itself.

    “Well, CLAW, It seems your robot could… use a hand!” He smiled at the screen.

    “Curse you, Gadget!” And at CLAW’s claw angrily slamming on his table. His cat grumpily jumped down from his lap.

    Gadget then unleashed his most devastating weapon: He pulled a small flower out of his coat and held it at the Robot’s turned head. Then he squeezed the small object. A small trickle of water squirt at the robots head and also at the neck where open circuits lay behind the armor. Many sparks flew and the smell of burnt plastic lay in the air.

    “Well, CLAW, I’ve been saving this for a rainy day. Your robot should better stay in the house though.”

    CLAW snarled in contempt and balled his fist. A deep dent was visible in the desk. He was obviously enraged due to the Inspector’s bad puns and the damage to his expansive desk. The screen went black and then faded into a brickwall again. Probably holographic technology.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:48 No.13707229
    >>13707216
    Gadget helped the other two men on their feet and told them to move to the nearest Police station. A quick call over his comm.-feed took care of the police tracking the transmission from the brick-screen. He then hid the robot behind a still intact crate and tucked his cut off arm beneath his coat. After that he hacked his way into a small laptop that lay in the office above the ground level and adjusted its cooling fan to work very loudly. Then he gave the OK-sign over comm..

    A few minutes later Penny walked in. She saw her uncle standing near a wooden desk. He was examining the table with his huge magnifying glass which was held by a hand that came from his opened hat. He always looked so funny when he did that! And it was always rather comical how he seemed to miss the obvious clues. For example the incredibly obvious laptop in the office above. Why hadn’t he checked it yet? She walked forward and tapped him on the shoulder.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:49 No.13707235
    >>13707229
    “Oh Penny! I didn’t hear you coming in!” He said with obvious (and fake) surprise.

    “I thought you could use some help.” She answered.

    “Oh sure! I was just looking for clues! Those playing cards on the table there must hold some kind of information!”

    “Sure uncle. I heard a Laptop nearby should I look at it?” She politely asked. It would be rude to point out that he had not yet noticed it yet.

    “My I didn’t notice any laptop. Sure go ahead!”

    Penny took a step forward and adjusted his coat. It was wet and one of the buttons was opened. After closing his coat she put her hands on her thigh and exclaimed:

    “Uncle what would you do it without me? Sigh. And you always get your clothes messed up when I’m not around, too.”
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)18:50 No.13707251
    >>13707229
    Wow...
    It all makes sense now...
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:50 No.13707252
    >>13707235
    A few days later Gadget received first reports. A woman and a young boy had been found near the origin of CLAW’s transmission. They were in fine health. There was also a destroyed desk. It was completely ripped asunder by some kind of claw. Maybe it had been a bear attack? The 3 mercenaries received witness protection and testified at court. Of course, the persons who got accused and arrested belonged to one of thousands of CLAW’s little companies that, for some reason, could never be linked back to him.

    Penny never found out about this. She found a few interesting pieces of data on the laptop. As far as she knew the mission had been saved by her. She didn’t know the truth. About her uncle, about the missions, about CLAW’s dubious methods. It was better that way. At least for now. At least until she was old enough for the thruth. Gadget wasn’t sure if anyone would ever be old enough for such a bitter truth.

    ---
    There. I hope it was en enjoyable read. I might write some more in the following days.
    >> Unconventional HFY writer 01/29/11(Sat)18:51 No.13707262
    >>13707252
    Also please criticize as you see fit. Any comment helps to improve my writing.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)18:52 No.13707276
         File1296345169.jpg-(190 KB, 740x1000, 1295707340470.jpg)
    190 KB
    >>13707252
    Bravo.
    Gadget as a caring genius is awesome
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)19:33 No.13707740
    Any more Grimdark stories?
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)19:39 No.13707815
    >>13706521
    If you have to ask that neufag, you should scurry on back to your glorified concentration camp in /b/.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)19:40 No.13707827
    >>13707815
    Also, OP: not bad, but you're seriously overdoing it on the brooding and flowery adjectives/adverbs. You know how some hot sauce is good but too much is a soggy unidentifiable mess? Same with adjectives and adverbs.
    >> Anonymous 01/29/11(Sat)19:48 No.13707945
    >>13707827
    Two Words my friend:
    GRIMDARK copyPasta.
    >> grimdark writefag. 01/29/11(Sat)19:51 No.13707984
         File1296348688.jpg-(74 KB, 386x557, 1287999672262.jpg)
    74 KB
    I fucking wrote this. Holy shit.
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)19:57 No.13708070
    >>13707984
    Did I do it justice?
    >> 01011001 !!q8KxB04TJME 01/29/11(Sat)20:06 No.13708191
    >>13707229
    >>13707235
    >>13707252
    Wow.
    >> grimdark writefag. 01/29/11(Sat)20:12 No.13708274
    >>13708070
    not bad at all. the new formatting is quite nice, sadly I couldnt do that at the time
    >> Gadget 01/29/11(Sat)20:13 No.13708302
    >>13708274
    I thought you would like it.



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