>not providing your own to start the thread.

I'm disappointed

File: 1344461588874.jpg-(62 KB, 580x350, ff9326.jpg)

>A group of witch, fighter, sorceress and a bard
>Travelling around beating people and taking names
>Fight in a forest
>Sorceress casts Fireball
>GM states that the forest is now on fire
>Barely escape the scene
>From now on, happens with anything flammable
>No confirmation rolls
>Just
>Fire

File: 1344462126330.gif-(1010 KB, 480x247, 1339956598455.gif)

>Slapping an evil organization around
>DMPC tagging along
>Necromancer casts something
>All of a sudden teleported to another plane
>Only way out is finding a runestone
>DMPC "magically" finds said runestone
>Decide steal it from the DMPC
>Roll dice and succeed unnoticed
>Teleport away, leave DMPC behind
>GM goes nuts and tells us all to leave his house

>>20238576
not a dick

>>20238695
total dick, drive your car into this guy's front window

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>>20238725
It would still be nice that there'd be a confirmation roll if something sets on fire. I don't think that every tree out there is doused with gasoline.

>>20238910
would you also like a confirmation roll for getting wet during a storm?

>I roll to dodge the rain

>>20238576
Actually that's pretty fair considering how OP fireball is.

Besides, you can expect MAGIC to come with no repercussions

File: 1344463621885.jpg-(49 KB, 333x500, 1242813814919.jpg)

>Fighting wizard
>Wizards allys are all dead and she's nearly dead has magical flying
>Wizard escapes to an area the PCs can't get to
>Forgets I have dimension door as a spell like ability
>Appear right behind her and unleash hell
>DM looks at enemies health and my damage
>"She teleports away with 1 hp."
>mfw

>>20238960
Dude, have you ever tried to start a fire? Unless that forest was a pine forest suffering from drought, it should have gone up because of a brief, explosive burst of fire. Green wood does not catch fire easily.

DM's not a dick though, just misinformed - plus that's easily solved by picking up energy substitution.

>>20238910
The trees take fire damage like everyone else. being trees they have no reflex save.
>>20238960
That's more a character initiated skill or feature than a DM's choice

Fireball starts fires. It's in the rules in 3.5 and Pathfinder. If you don't want to start fires, use Lightning Bolt.

>>20238986
Normally I'd agree, however the spell specifically says that it doesn't cause fires.
If the DM wants to change that (which is fine) then the players should be informed beforehand.

>>20239073
>The fireball sets fire to combustibles and damages objects in the area. It can melt metals with low melting points, such as lead, gold, copper, silver, and bronze. If the damage caused to an interposing barrier shatters or breaks through it, the fireball may continue beyond the barrier if the area permits; otherwise it stops at the barrier just as any other spell effect does.

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/fireball.htm

File: 1344464113455.jpg-(33 KB, 220x308, Lightning_Bolt.jpg)

>>20239068
There has been a few times that Lightning Bolt has started a fire. Still no confirmation rolls.

>captcha blacksmiths' basespr
>Burned that down too

>>20239099
You're right. I must have been thinking of lightning bolt then.

>>20239001

Ouch. That's a pretty shitty move on your DM's part. He should have just admitted that he had been outplayed and done his best to adapt the campaign so that it could cope with the sudden death of his pet BBEG.

>>20239111
>The lightning bolt sets fire to combustibles and damages objects in its path. It can melt metals with a low melting point, such as lead, gold, copper, silver, or bronze. If the damage caused to an interposing barrier shatters or breaks through it, the bolt may continue beyond the barrier if the spell’s range permits; otherwise, it stops at the barrier just as any other spell effect does.

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/lightningBolt.htm

>>20239099
Guess I'm just retarded then.

I have a story of my DM being a dick, but it was to punish our That Guy.
>be in underground cave
>all of our gear gone
>have That Guy as gunslinger or w.e
>Constantly bitching about how he absolutely needs to find his ammo
>the entire fucking time
>cut to later
>be in room with bad guys nearby
>dumbass grabs magic torch and the torch goes out
>starts yelling "FIX IT FIX IT FIX IT FIX IT FIX IT" OOC
>DM tells him to bite his tongue because of our proximety to bad guys
>cut to later, again
>He is still bitching about his ammo, we've recovered some of our gear but not all of it
>Going down hallway and the hallway T's off
>we hear marching
>fucking shield wall ala 300 heading our way
>He bitches again about how he could easily take them out if he had his ammo
>The shield wall throws a bomb
>it is at this point I realize what the DM is doing and immediately pokerface
>We have three round volley with bomb
>it ultimately blows up between our groups
>this triggers a chain reaction explosion
>Just so happens that the bombs were made using the guy's black powdet and whatnot
>I lol'd internally

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>>20239130

>group of neutral characters
>no good clerics
>no undead hate
>DM refuses to allow necromancy
>dont mind, just want a reason
>"its evil"
>run it by the party
>nobody else cares
>still refuses to, and acts like ever having an evil PC would ruin his campaign
>He himself was forced to play an evil character once (curse caused an alignment change) and played it extremely well
>still thinks any of us would do a shitty job
he has literally told us that He just thinks we would use it as an excuse to butcher all the townsfolk.
What the fuck man.

its only a minor annoyance for me, but fuck if its not annoying.

>>20239155

>He thinks we would abuse an evil alignment.

To be fair, this is likely due to past experience and threads like these more than anything else.

Sci-fi RPG, homebrew setting, described as weird and quirky, similar to Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy
>Stop at 'space truck stop' station, similar to the thing in Spaceballs.
>Crew member kidnapped, taken to 'other side of space station.'
Okay, lets walk over there and get her back.
>You can't, the other side is not connected to this side internally. You have to fly around.
Horseshit, this is all one station, you described it that way. They've got to share an internal wall somewhere. I take my demo kit and go to blow a hole though the back wall.
>You get lost and end up in a storeroom full of waffle batter.
Okay, I get the hint, we have to fly in. We get in the freighter and gatecrash the other side of the station.
>You can't, the mansion on the other side of the station has great big guns that will blow your piddly freighter out of the sky.
There's a mansion. And a huge anti-ship gun array. WELDED TO THE BACK OF A TRUCK STOP?
>Yes.
OKAY. We'll call them up and negotiate.
>They want a marriageable female human, <homebrew race> or <other homebrew race>. They're not giving up this one until they do.
Okay, so here's the plan, we agree to trade, we'll go down to make the trade, and then guns blazing, rescue our crewmate!
>The NPC girl to be traded objects to the plan, she wants to marry these guys because they have money.
Wat.
>Yup.
Okay. Whatever, we insist on having our crazy wookie analog that doesn't understand human or near-human religion perform the ceremony, because we'd like to retain some feeling of agency. You've successfully forced us to marry a crewmember off to the surprise wafflehouse barons. What the fuck ever.

This whole sequence would have been fine, and even funny had she done better in describing the situation, but every single thing felt like an asspull.

>>20238960
>A successful Reflex save results in no damage, but the save must be repeated each round.

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/epic/spells/rainOfFire.htm

File: 1344464958810.jpg-(117 KB, 750x600, Paladins.jpg)

>Cleric?
>Okay
>Inquisitor?
>That's cool
>Paladin?
>ONE
>MUST
>FALL

One of these GM make my blood boil.

>>20239194
I thought so too, but when asked he admitted he has never even played a game with an evil PC, nor does he brows /tg/ to learn shit.
This is someone who has played D&D for 20 years, and is blocking off a ton of options for his group.
also
>guy is a fairly flexible GM
>wanting to do Black Flame Zealot PrC for flavor, and the fact I cant be an Assassin because HURRR EVIL
>get poison use
>go to apply poison
>"no you cant"
>Why the fuck not?
>"Poison use is evil"
>wait, whats your opinion on it.
>"Its not evil, just dishonorable"
>Yeah, its dishonorable for a rogue to sneak up and backstab someone, but thats not evil
>"you have a point."
>So...can I use the poison then since we have reached a conclusion?
>No, its evil

I even showed him the PrC beforehand, didn't even tell me I would practically be giving up a level with no benefit.
once again, a minor thing, not really rage worth, but annoying none the less.
I swear, the man will be willing to adjust basically everything if he finds it to be balanced. But under no circumstances will He budge on what the players handbook/DMG says is an evil act.

As a DM, I ruled that the Diamond Mind maneuvers that let you use a concentration check in place of a save can still be used to counter the meta-magic feat that takes the save off of a spell, even though there technically isn't a save to replace as described in the maneuver.

The reason being to give one of the party-members (the only creature in the AOE that had warblade levels) had a chance to avoid being smashed with a bunch of sonic damage.

Was this a dick move? I did allow the players (pair of sorcerers with cooperative casting builds) to take the feat in the first place.

>>20239343
Yes. They should know about any house rules before they finished making their characters.
How can they know you're not just going to alter the rules on a whim?

>>20239343
If it's for the survivability of the players it's never a dick move.

if it's for the survivability of a super special scenario or character, then it's borderline dickmove

if it's for the survivability of an annoying circumstance, character, or object then it is a dick move but sometimes dickmoves can be fun if you're playing a comedy campaign

File: 1344466071233.png-(17 KB, 340x422, partytime.png)

>>20239294
Browsing /tg/ is not an indication of experience or intelligence.
There is nothing wrong with not playing evil games.
You could have been more attentive to his inexperience in the area when asking him about using a PrC intended for villains.
Failing all else, Now You Know that in his game, that wasn't a good choice. Ask him if you can retrain to something else if you're so upset about the wasted level.
He is under no obligation to houserule in your favor if he doesn't feel like it.

>Playing a game
>DMNPC sue is in our group
>Strict railroading
>No actual BBEG or evil plan so far
>We make it to the port city
>DMNPC sue keeps bragging on about this plot point thing that we need so damn much
>Hell no, our party wants to buy a ship, and be merchants
>DM, teeth clinged agrees
>Party rests
>DM tells that DMNPC sue stole our boat, sold it, and bought that Plot item
>Expects us to act like nothing happened
>We murder DMNPC sue
>DM starts screaming, and goes "rocks fall everyone die"

>>20239538
You're shitty players. Can't you just accept a fucking plot hook?

>>20239534
>PrC intended for villains
try "any non-good"
>You could have been more attentive to his inexperience
But he isn't inexperienced, he knows what is listed as good an evil, and poison use is evil. Its the entire reason I showed him the class (more than once mind you), and he gave it the green light.

I dont mind not being able to do it, but when I specifically show it to you to get the yes or no, and if you will allow it or not, I at least expect "Anon, I dont allow this" in response.

>>20239538
Wow, good riddance

sounds like a horrible campaign

>>20239631
Fuck no. Campain was boring, and shitty. All we wanted some high seas fun.

>>20239631
>DM unable to adjust his campaign to the players reactions
let me correct you sir. "He's a shitty GM, Why cant He just fucking accept fucking change?"

I was GMing a Savage Worlds Weird Wars campaign and the PCs were interrogating an SS Officer and one of them wanted to shoot him to break his will,he rolled a rise so i said that he accidentally shot the SS-guy in the face.

>>20239670
Why should he? He's the GM, it's his world they're playing in.

>>20239707
He should accept change if he wants players to exist in his shitty world.

Railroading and Shit-making generally makes players find another GM. You want overthrown? Follow the example set by that guy's GM

>>20239707
A (good) GM should be able to roll with the punches as much as the players do.
You dont know what they plan to do, and they dont know what you plan to do. Yeah, they could have come to some sort of agreed consensus, but the DM railroading the party in a direction that really doesn't matter to them, and bores the fuck out of everyone isn't really fair for anyone but the DM.

>>20239707
>>20239707
Oh, i don't know, cus a GM is actually an entertainer attempting to create an intruiging and alive world in which players can develope their characters and explore the possibilities?

Or basically: GM NO PLAYER GET IF SUCK.

>>20239227
>Surprise wafflehouse barons

I lol'd

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>>20239640
Did I say Evil? No. I said Villain. Anti-Hero, you could pull off, but the class is pretty clearly intended for NPCs. Next you'll be complaining about how your Ur-Priest is "just misunderstood."

You gained the ability to apply poisons without poisoning yourself. You did NOT gain the ability to perform an evil action without consequences.
Wizards don't have to cast fireball at orphanages and Rogues don't have to sneak attack beggars; your character does not have to use poison.
It's unfortunate that you and your DM managed to miscommunicate to the extent that you did, but it's pretty clear that you want to play an Evil character and he doesn't want to run a game with Evil characters. Buy some ravages and make do, or talk to him about a redo. This isn't as hard as you make it out to be.

>>20239912
I'm fine with playing Neutral. (Hell,he nearly even banned that)
on the rest of it, you are reading waaaay too deep into this.

>>20239912
>Wizards don't have to fireball orphanages

Wait what? Really? I've been doing it wrong this whole time.

>>20239273
Play an inquisitor... an spanish inquisitor.

>>20239707
Not all of us are in this to fulfill our elaborate power fantasies.

Some of us want to tell a story with the players.

>>20239991
Sorcerer's barbecue orphanages. Wizards torture Hound Archons in front of Good aligned Clerics and play ping pong with Lantern Archons

I feel like this thread is all full of "That Guys". A lot of the posts receive a "Well, that's actually not that terrible." response and suddenly new information is unveiled to prove that the GM is an asswipe.

>>20240091
Shit...This makes me feel like I may have been playing my Warlock wrong.
Wat do guys.

File: 1344468367759.jpg-(34 KB, 298x291, 1280180960706.jpg)

>DM awards bonus experience based on damage done
>I play a bard

>>20240110
>I feel like this thread is all full of "That Guys"
/tg/ has been a That Guy circlejerk lately, honestly.

Okay, I've got a story that'll put all of you to shame. Guaranteed.

It was a new game for me, with a DM I'd never played with before. Second session. My character was the son of a minor nobleman, away from home on business for his family's trading house.

He's at an inn, where he'd stayed for the night. He comes down for breakfast in the morning in the common room, leaving his armour locked up upstairs in his room to get a bite to eat and to talk to a courier about sending an update to his father about the task at hand. It takes about half an hour.

He heads back up to his third floor room, to find his armour is missing, his bedroom window is open and broken, and there's a splattering of blood, both inside and leading a trail away.

Now, let me stop here for just a moment to say that - being my second session - my character had not yet quite "meshed" with the rest of the party. No hostility, he just wasn't yet at that point where he as a part of the gang, in the "your quest is my quest" sort of way. I think we all expected this to happen organically in the next session or two. As such, he was not staying at the same place as the rest of the party. I did not intend or want to hog the spotlight or anything; I figured my character would have his breakfast, send his message, get dressed, pay up, and go meet with the rest of the party. Five minutes or so of RP, right?

NOPE.

(continued)

>>20240123
Oh, are you kidding? With just a touch of thought you could destroy that shit.

>>20240123
>not awarding experience on a defeated monster basis
>not awarding bards and caster experience for pursueding or turning the monster
>not giving exp for 'defeating' traps
>not giving exp for talking through shit
>not giving exp for sneaking past an obstacle

it's like I'm playing Tommy the Train's Railroad Adventure!

>>20240117
Don't play a Warlock

>>20240130

So, I heave a sigh, because I know that to give chase to this thief means going RIGHT NOW. This means there's no time to go looking for the rest of the party. They don't get to be involved, and the other players are just sitting around doing nothing. This - it should be noted - is NOT an unusual state of affairs with this DM.

My character runs after this wounded thief, rolling spot, listen, and gather information (D&D 3.5, for the record) as he makes his way through the morning crowd, and is having little luck. Finally, after making me roleplay this for twenty minutes or so, he has it end with my character being informed that some local police had apprehended the man and taken him away. I was annoyed by the fact that all that time was wasted, both for me and for the other players, but just glad this bullshit was over with. Perhaps the DM had realized this was a stupid idea and decided to drop it, right?

NOPE.

>>20240123
oh shit, reminds me of whats going on in my current game, just did our second session
>DM awards more XP for whoever the party votes as "MVP, Best roleplayer, honorable mentions"
>says they should level up maybe every 2-4 sessions, while people who dont get votes will level up every 7-10
>says he does this to make people put in effort instead of just showing up
>everyone puts in a fuckton of effort, nobody just "shows up"
>everyone always votes for the same people
>ton of the party is already behind because of this

>>20240198
You can't play this game on democracy.

You have to play it like communism or the unbalance [spoielr] lol, balance [/spoiler] will kill the lesser voters

>>20240198
>everyone always votes for the same people
Uh, just don't do that?

>>20240192

So my character goes to the local law enforcement office, and is made to sit and wait in line to speak to someone about this. Any sensible DM would have been like "Half an hour passes, and you're seen by the local constable", right? Of course. Not so here. He feels like really hammering home the monotony of waiting helplessly in line. The other players are naturally feeling it more than I am by this point, and I'm desperate just to wrap this up so I can get back to them and stop preventing them from actually playing.

Finally, my character gets seen, and he explains the situation as best he can. He's told that the prisoner has - in the half-hour he's been waiting here - been moved to the dungeons in the local wizard's tower, and the armour moved there as evidence.

I heave a sigh of resignation, both in and out of character. I can't fucking believe that we can't just handwave this. If not for the fact that I'd been roleplaying this as 'family armour, with great sentimental value', I'd have just said fuck it and gone to buy some replacement somewhere.

But, okay. I head on up to the wizard's tower, hoping to get this wrapped up so the other players can play. Easy-peasy, right?

NOPE.

>>20240231
So far, everyone in the party either flat out hates the idea, or is 50/50 on it.
I personally, cant stand it.

>>20240258
perhaps you should vote on it

>>20240250
Hey, we give our honest opinion. Its not our fault we have an amazing, charismatic roleplayer, and another tactician.
those two people are the only people everyone but themselves vote for.

>Mutants and Masterminds
>Playing a Batmanlike character
>Group consists of a Speedster, a green-lantern, a dr.strange/scarlet witch sorceress, and a superman ripoff
>After about two months of sessions, Superman character gets it into his head that he should just force the world to be good
>Everyone else seems to more or less be going along with it
>Pretend to go along with it without skipping a beat, passing notes on to GM and making rolls away from others to build up my plan to take out the new super dictator if things go bad, which they obviously will
>Eventually discover his weakness, and set up a foolproof plan to take out the speedster, witch, alien/greenlantern and superman and save/preserve humanity from tyrant gods.
>Turns out GM has been passing everything along to the superman character's player without requiring any rolls, so he has been appraised of every single thing I've been doing over the last few sessions to prepare to overthrow him
>Soon as I set my plan into motion he immediately stops it and kills me

>>20240272
Okay, so don't do that? Just talk out the problem and don't do it? This is serious the most simply solved problem imaginable.

File: 1344469013694.gif-(3 KB, 344x326, 1321322162001.gif)

>>20240272
Wait, why don't the players vote for themselves?

>>20240297
one of the sort of "unspoken rules".

>>20240291
That is the most retarded shit ever.

>>20240002

Everybody expects the Spanish Inquisition.

>>20240308
No, fuck that, that would solve your problem. You don't get sympathy for being an idiot anon, nothing about this is your DM's fault.

File: 1344469121675.png-(173 KB, 316x330, nyjwfd.png)

>>20238986
>OP
>Fireball

>>20240311
Yeah. And it wasn't even as if his plan was any good, it was literally to just be as fascist as possible and turn the world into a police state and force everyone to be good all the time while our witch monitored people for thought crimes.

The GM justified it by just handwaving away any of my questions or complaints and saying, 'Well, he would be able to sense your heartbeat and nervousness any time you were around him so naturally he'd be on edge and looking into you more.'

>>20240308
No, voting for yourself is perfectly ok until that one faggot who's hellbent on giving humility in hopes it will get him laid comes up and votes for the most obvious choice.

from there the most obvious choice gets superpowers, the DM finally finds his idea unfair and drops it.

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>>20238986

>d&d 3.5
>bind tenebrous, which lets me see in darkness and magical darkness
>encounter magical darkness
>dm says it's advanced darkness, and I can't see through it

Also

>same dm and campaign
>fighting boss with poison-styled whirlwind attack
>bind buer due to swamp toxins and shit
>boss gains psychic abilities and goes straight for me, despite no outward signs of the anti poison aura

I'm starting to think my DM dislikes binders....

>>20238986
I'm playing a game right now and the mage is very angry that fireball has Friendly Fire on.

>>20240331
>>20240350
Oh good, a samefag has just caught wind of a post made 100 years ago

>>20240357
>dm says it's advanced darkness, and I can't see through it

Would a damn Fog Cloud have been so hard?

>>20240357
Nah, your DM is just a prick who fiats rather than planning properly.

>>20240357
Everyone dislikes binders

they're like forsakers, but more powerful

File: 1344469388691.jpg-(60 KB, 250x250, coolherc.jpg)

>>20240363

No really, your tale was quite rousing old chap!

>>20240395
Binders don't even compare to wizards, also they are a great class.

>>20240395
>binders
>powerful

wut

>>20240256
...go on.

>>20240403
>>20240404
>more powerful than forsakers
>automatically mean wizard tier

>>20240404

This nigga again.

How's it feel to fap to numbers?

>DM introduces a kender
>despite me having made a character explicitly designed to despise and exterminate kenders on sight (due to run ins with people who played them as an excuse to steal from lawful good players without retribution)
>suddenly realise "oh wait! he's just testing me, he's throwing a plot hook in for when I inevitably administer vigilante justice to the kender"
>DM illustrates how important he is to the community despite being a thieving little shit
>realise we're going to be given a quest about escaping a lynch mob
>he starts stealing my stuff
>catch him and immolate the fucker, as a brief look at my character sheet would have predicted
>prepare myself for a experience akin to batmans off screen escape at the end of The Dark Knight
>DM is enraged and "remembers" the ludicrous amounts of bodyguards in the room
should have interrupted him the moment the word kender came up…

>>20240256

I head on up to the stupid wizard's fucking tower, and explain my situation. I'm shown to where my armour is being kept, and am told to get it back, I'd need to pay a processing fee to compensate the officials who got it back. Fucking banditry as far as I'm concerned, but fuck it. I'm willing to part with some gold just to see this idiotic bullshit over and done with. I pay up and get my armour on.

I'm then told that I feel a horrible shuddering sensation all over my body, and the armour tightens around me of its own accord.

Fuck.

So, I demand to be allowed to go and see the prisoner. He's this ancient old man, and I'm wondering internally how this withered corpse of a man was supposed to be able to climb to the third floor and haul out my whole fucking suit of armour. But whatever. The DM is a retard. I can see this now. No point in poking holes in this bullshit; there will only be more bullshit to fill in those holes.

The old man is cackling like a madman, and it takes forever to get any useful information out of him. I turn and apologize on behalf of the DM to the other players, who by this point haven't gotten to play for about an hour.

Eventually, I get it out of him that this old man was some dispossessed peasant who lost his land to a landgrab by my character's family decades ago, and when he learned I had arrived on this island - THE PREVIOUS DAY - he plotted this revenge. He laid a curse on my armour, so that I'd age so rapidly that in a month or so, I'd be as old as him, and a week or two later, I'd be dead of old age.

So, my character - this minor nobleman - has basically been murdered by this irate peasant. This should constitute some sort of punishment for the criminal, right?

NOPE.

>>20240422
I (>>20240404) never said Wizard, I just said not powerful.

They're sustainable and cool, not powerful; like Warblades.

>>20240445
I (>>20240395) never said they were a powerful class in general

I simply told you that they're more powerful than a forsaker

>Playing DnD
>Do something DM doesn't like
>All of a sudden there is a guard everywhere, they all know what you've done, or question you as if you're openly Jewing about in Nazi Germany, there's no escaping the meta-punishment of displeasing your DM

>>20239903
Glad someone got some entertainment out of that story. Honestly, if she had set it all up instead of asspulling it all it would have been fucking hilarious - talk about these rednecks that hit it big selling waffles to aliens who think waffles are the only useful contribution humans have made to the galaxy. Describe the space station as a sprawling complex of welded together wrecks that has a clear truckstop on one side, and an over-fancy habitat with a halfdozen converted freighters with oversized guns and engines docked in front of it. Play up the 'rednecks need wives' aspect. Reveal that one of our crewmates is a horrendous golddigger - she's only aboard because she thought our alien captain was rich and was willing to take alien dong if it meant marrying into money. It had serious potential for sidesplitting laughter, but she just pulled every twist from nowhere.

>>20240438

The officials at this fucking tower tell me that on this fucking island, curses get tossed around willy-nilly all the time. If they punished everyone who cursed someone else, they'd never get anything else done!

I wish I was kidding.

Now, cursing a piece of equipment is not the sort of thing that some peasant nobody can do in five minutes, on the run, while wounded, on the street. Hell, I don't even know why he would bother to steal it if he could curse it that easily. Just lay his curse and leave it there for me to put on, right? Nothing about this makes any fucking sense. Not in terms of what should be possible, not in terms of motivation, not in terms of opportunity, not in terms of the function of the legal system, and not in terms of letting the other players play.

But whatever. Fuck it.

My character demands the old man's help in lifting the curse. I'm told that he's been sentenced to community service. NOT for murdering a nobleman, but for the theft. And if I want to interfere with the law, then I can take his place on the chain gang.

I say fuck it, and storm out, with the old man laughing behind me. I have to assume that the DM has some sort of plan in place here, that he's trying to railroad me in to, right?

NOPE.

haven't seen this story up yet

>playing a campain
>be a wizard
>the rest of the pary is melee fighters
>the DM throws a god at us
>the god points out some objectives in our next task
>cleric praises her and prepares to see her off
>just then,
>the party fighter expresses his dislike for the god
>spits on her
>god curses him
>fighter kills self
>party is now Emiya Shirou

>>20240486
fuck that sounds annoying.

File: 1344470215123.jpg-(8 KB, 231x184, Nonsense 2.jpg)

>>20240568
>your DM's internal face when this entire thing

>>20240482
>>20240482
>>20240482
That's what a DM is supposed to do to train his players, bro.

>>20240700
No. I understand catching some shit for doing something blatantly that-guy.

But no.

>>20240568

I wave my hand angrily and tell the DM to get back to the other players. I refuse to deny them the opportunity to play any longer, while I sit and fume.

They eventually manage to locate my character, who explains his situation. He concocts a plan to get this thing off, involving going to a local armourer's shop and getting them to essentially cut it off me. It's not magical aside from this curse, and shouldn't be that hard using the tools they have in store.

Now, a sensible DM might just handwave it and say "you spend a couple of hours and 20 GP with various blacksmiths and such, each of which tries to remove it, only to find themselves unable to do so." In this case, we're not so lucky. We have to roleplay through the whole miserably pointless experience. My armour essentially heals itself over and over again, faster than it can be damaged. I go through four healing potions as I get a couple of guys to go at its buckles with a set of axes, all to no effect.

Finally, it's plain he doesn't intend any sort of simple solution here. The rest of the party isn't too impressed with this either, and want this to be over. This is seriously getting in the way of the quest they were on before I joined the session before, and they know I no more want to be holding things up than they do, but know my character CAN'T pay attention to anything else with this sort of death sentence hanging over his head.

It's suggested that, since they were already heading for an elven village that's reputed to be the home of some powerful wizards, perhaps I can get help there. I think for a moment that maybe I've spotted the railway tracks and it's time to get aboard. Maybe the next stop, I can get off this stupid ride, right?

NOPE.

>>20240357
There's a 1st level spell called Ebon Eyes that lets you see in Magical Darkness. There's also a Least warlock invocation for the same, but any spell-induced darkness cannot be seen via Darkvision, of which only functions for Natural darkness.

I can't help but notice that several of these "My DM is a Dick" posts are "I don't know the rules of the game I'm playing and can't be bothered to read the full description of the abilities I'm using."

>>20240571
>>20240571
I don't get it.

>>20240725
Tenebrous =/= Darkvision.

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>>20240735

File: 1344470805991.jpg-(35 KB, 650x450, 1332906357450.jpg)

>>20240725
>>20240749

>And then I was the faggot who didn't read the rule.

Thank you.

>>20240725
>bind tenebrous, which lets me see in darkness and magical darkness
>lets me see in darkness and magical darkness
>magical darkness
You cannot into reading.

>>20240735
There was a guy complaining about one of his players a while back.

said that the player offended a god and got cursed. afterwards he decided to have his player kill it's self so he could make "a character like Emiya Shiro"

>>20240725
"Advanced Darkness" was clearly an asspull by the DM because he didn't want the Binder to be able to see

>>20240762
Nah I got that part. But the fighter is dead and the party has nothing to do with it so I didn't get how it relates.

>>20240723

So we go to this fucking place, and as we're on our way there, I make a point of roleplaying my character stopping to go stand waist-deep in a river while he pisses and shits himself, then waits for the rushing water to wash some of it away. I make it clear that the stench still lingers with me, because I can't get the fucking armour off, and everyone's just going to have to live with that. I'm not going to not play up the complete misery of this situation.

We finally get there, and after much humming and hawing, I'm told that the only way to undo this curse involves getting the blood of a dragon. Dragons, I'm told, are thought to be mythological creatures in this setting, but "You think that dragons might have something to do with the emperor, who nobody ever sees."

"Ah. So the emperor is a shapeshifted dragon. Got it," I say.

The DM attempts what I presume to be a devilish twinkle in his eye, as if to invite me to punch him in the face, and says "I never said that EXACTLY..."

Now, the party's quest is taking them in exactly the opposite direction of the emperor's home, and I've got a ticking clock hanging over my head here. There's no way I can justify traveling with them any longer, and their task is too important to waste time with this poor guy they just met two days ago. Any hope of party cohesion is out the window.

I'm hoping that something will come along to fix this, and when I'm told a human army has surrounded the elven forest, I think maybe that's what this is.

NOPE.

>>20238576

That sounds like an excellent DM.

>>20238576
I love that picture

>>20239294
Poison use isn't just not evil, it's humane. I'd rather load up a bear with tranquilizer (Dex poison or sleep poison, take your pick) than outright kill it, for instance. Poison is a neutral tool, like a sword or a fireball. How you use it determines good or evil.

>>20240828
>I make a point of roleplaying my character stopping to go stand waist-deep in a river while he pisses and shits himself, then waits for the rushing water to wash some of it away.
You're that guy.

>>20239145

Yep

>>20240828

Why is it that you have not skinned this DM?

>>20240881
I'm hoping the story ends wth the DM getting headbutted

>>20240828

Turns out, this is an entire army being brought in pursuit of one of the other party members. This elf girl who, while she was in town, had met with the local army commander. He had tried to rape and murder her in his office, and she had cast charm person on him in the hopes of making an escape that didn't involve any bloodshed. It had worked. Unfortunately, he'd now brought his entire army to arrest her for assaulting him with magic.

It becomes clear that she'll never be able to leave this village alive. The elves won't hand her over, and the humans aren't willing to invade, but she can't get out without being arrested. Now, this character was a sorcerer, whose whole life and sense of identity revolves around her magic, and the quest they're on basically involves going to this location to prevent her from losing access to it forever. But now if she tries, she'll be arrested, and then probably raped and murdered.

The player of this character and I are good friends, OOC, and the two of us just look at one another and silently communicate to one another one simple thought:

NOPE.

>>20240888

At least some sort of physical harm is warranted

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>>20240723
>>20240568
>>20240438
>>20240256
>>20240192
>>20240130

What the absolute fuck. I know I've occasionally been guilty of spending too much time on an individual PC, but that's usually because they specifically leave to go do individual things, and it runs overlong, or because something big was happening that only one PC ran into, but this... this just seems like there's no POINT to it all and he's just dicking around because he's being a dick. You character is going to die/get retired, and he's going to act surprised isn't he? I've known some horrendous DM's, but never played with them.

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>>20240906
>In this town, a peasant who has already been arrested and confesses to attempting to murder a noble with magic faces no punishment
>meanwhile, the entire army of the town will invade another nation to punish someone who used non-lethal magic in clear self-defense
that's some 5-star consistency there, DM

My friend's character collapses to the ground, weeping soundlessly, eyes and mind gone blank. She's done. She's defeated. She can't go on any longer.

My character looks at her, looks at the army commander, and announces that he just met these people two days ago and had no knowledge of their criminal activities. He disavows them, and any association with them. One of the party members begs mine to stay, and my character whirls on him furiously.

"Ever since I met you people, my life has been nothing but a nightmare. I look at her, and I see where this is all heading for me in a few days. She's been sucked down into a vortex of doom that I'm just on the very lip of. I am now turning from it and swimming away from it, and from you all, with all of my might."

He then storms off, wishing the army commander all due luck, and I explain that my character is returning to his wealthy father, who can hopefully just pay some fucking wizard to uncurse this fucking thing.

At this point, my friend and I both make it clear that our characters are done. Out. Fuck this shit.

The DM is visibly taken aback. He didn't see this coming at all! We demand for him to explain why he thought any of this was a good idea. And do you think we got a very good explanation?

NOPE.

>>20240873

I don't make a BIG deal of it, but I don't want to whitewash what a constantly terrible thing this curse is, either. For me and for everyone else around me.

>>20240906
*crosses fingers for quest destroying player antics A-Team style* C'MOONN PC'S PUT DAT DM IN HIS PLACE

>>20239258
This fucking guy. Cracking me up.

>>20241002
So like, how did he justify it?

>>20241002

You do realise you have to shit in his pillow now?

>>20241002

Aw. Mang, think you might've over-reacted? So far the DM had only THREATENED to ruin your characters. He hadn't done it yet. When he actually does the dumb shit, then you revolt.

Though dragging it all out was bullocks

>>20241048
No, the DM literally death-sentenced 2 characters. That is not overreacting, that is completely justified.

>>20241048
Ha ha are you joking that DM was fucking terrible.

>>20239538
The problem was miscommunication, if you had a session for character creation and worked on your background, telling the DM that your characters WANTED TO BE HIGH SEAS MERCHANTS, then he is the one to blame, since he didn't listened to your character concepts and was too busy coming up with a plot the PC's had no reason to joy.

If he listened, and you just went "he's an adventurer" with no more detail, barely came up with ideas, connections or places during chargen. And suddenly, out of fucking nowhere, your characters wanted to become merchants, (I wonder how a wizard, a monk or a paladin would like to "just be merchants", i'm sure you'll have your own reasons...) that's unfocused players and you never took the game seriously in the first place.

Players and GMs are meant to cooperate, not being dicks on each other.

>>20241048
The DM didn't threaten to ruin them, he was actively ruining them.

>>20241002
Hurry the fuck up. I have work in about 5 hours & I need to sleep, but I won't be able to until this is done

>>20241079
possibly, but he reacted in the worst possible way. A halfway decent D.M. would have let them be pirates or whatever for a session, then have them end up shipwrecked on an island where they have to go through some modified version of his plan, and then come up with a high seas adventure while they finish that up. Yes, he's railroading them, but it's in an interesting way and because of their characters actions, not because of some DMPC bullshit

>>20241101
>>20241101
>>20241101
>>20241101

>>20241048

I'm with >>20241062 on this one. The DM put a 6-week death sentence on one player in medieval land where he can't just hop a plane and see a cursebreaking specialist, and placed a 'lose your magic' sentence on a player who literally, only had magic as a contribution to the party.

And that's aside from the vastly differing reactions to the two spells used and the old man hauling around the full-plate shenanigans.

>>20241002

He tells us that he thought that this would bring the group TOGETHER. Like we weren't fucking capable of coming up with party cohesion on our own, we needed to have some sort of shared threat to do it for us. Never fucking mind that my character no longer had time for their quest, and my character had become too much of a burden for them to deal with anymore. Never mind that what I faced had no bearing on them. This was supposed to bring us TOGETHER.

I feel I should also note that the DM had a DMPC several levels higher than the rest of us, who was constantly trying to manipulate us with vague "signs" and "portents", and who all of our characters had come to loathe and distrust because of his constant attempts at vague-sounding manipulation. He was the one who suggested my character come to the elf village and the one begging my character to stay, saying that he had "Signs" that my character was supposed to be with them. Naturally, our characters had taken to creating situations where we could talk out of that character's earshot and then fall silent whenever he was around. It was plain that he intended this as the party's leader, whereas we all viewed him as our enemy.

We spent about an hour dressing him down in front of the other players in his own home, making it very clear what every single individual mistake he'd made was. There would be no refuge, no weaseling out. He tried to defend himself, both in his railroading and his endless roleplaying of pointless, meaningless, inconsequential scenes by saying he was a theatre major, and for him, the scene was all-important. And if it took half an hour to play out a scene, or if a scene happened to play out in a way that was difficult, so be it. We called him a selfish, narcissistic prick.

>>20241194


He tried to tell us that he intended to give our characters overwhelming odds to overcome so we could be that much more heroic when we overcame them. We pointed out that every single effort to overcome them in any meaningful way was squashed by the weight of the world around us, and there didn't seem to be any means of actually doing so or even trying.


Ultimately, my friend and I fucked off, and spent the night in a Denny's discussing how this guy did not understand a thing about setting or plot or party dynamics, and wound up creating a whole game setting on our own as we sat over a couple of burgers and fries.

In the end, we were happy enough to have been able to create something cool that it washed away at least some of the bitterness of what had preceded it.

>>20241194
Goodbye to playing any games at that guys house, lol.

>>20241079
No, if the players decide in session that, hey ,t hey want to be high-seas pirates now - you give them the opportunity to be high seas pirates and throw the macguffin at them in the hold of another pirate ship they raid. This is why you create ideas that flexible so when your PC's walk away from the Horrible Doomcave of Certain Death, they can still get the Crystal of Plot Device when they decide they want to be gold miners or highwaymen via finding an acient ruin in their mine or robbing an important guy.

>>20241227

I find it SHOCKING to think that you believe this would be a cause for anything other than celebration!

>>20241221
>He tried to tell us that he intended to give our characters overwhelming odds to overcome so we could be that much more heroic when we overcame them.

Overwhelming odds only work if they only seem overwhelming. If they actually are overwhelming, do you think you'll come out on top when the dice are rolled?

NOPE.

>>20241227
Doesn't look like too much of a drawback to me.

>>20241221
Wow and i thought my DMs were complete shit.

>>20241248
Would you prefer to leave Cheetos stains and spilled beer all over the house of somebody you like or somebody you despise?

>>20241227
Isn't that an incentive?

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>>20241221
I know that feel. Sometimes after a night of shitty gaming, be it a pointless RP, a night of getting your shit kicked in at 40k by That Guy, or jut having dice fuck you sideways all night, sitting around bullshitting in a diner makes it all better.

>>20241253
there's also a difference between "overwhelming because of the magnitude of what you're doing" and "overwhelming because you can't get the tiniest bit of help from anyone."
The first one is awesome if done right. The second one is soul-crushingly frustrating. I mean, fuck, the guy just wanted to get a curse off his armour and a confessed murderer to be punished and an entire town couldn't give less of a fuck. That's entering the realm of absurdity

>>20240968

You know how in D&D, they talk about a given society having an overall alignment, which most of the residents and all of the legal system basically adhere to to one extent or another?

We decided that we were in a chaotic evil society, and didn't bother to consult with the DM on this. We didn't care what he thought or intended. It was plainly what he was playing it as, and it's how we took to responding to it.

>>20241221
Thanks bro, now I can sleep.

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I'm still only DMing my first adventure, but...

How in the fuck do people get ideas like these and think they aren't terrible?

>>20241292
>>20241253
>>20241149
>>20241094

It's worth noting that for that friend of mine and I, and eventually among our broader gaming circle, "Doom vortex" has become a sort of running gag. The idea spawned by my character's assessment of the situation we found ourselves in, where everything was just conspiring to drag us down to our inevitable doom, with no obvious way out. We've never seen it again in that sort of magnitude because we've never again played with a DM so apparently determined to destroy the party, but it remains a running joke.

>>20241349
Here's the thing, most awful DM stories are the result of the DM being an ass and not letting the PCs have fun. Railroading, showing them up with a mary sue, exacting unreasonable revenge on a party member when they do something the DM doesn't like. Ideas for adventures can usually work out though, just try your best and don't be a dick.

>>20241349
Sometimes, we as DMs get really silly ideas that just don't work out the way you intend, but mostly you can salvage the situation when you see it going to shit.

Your DM's shitty curse village was more of a hellhole then menzoberranzan. Go ahead and get caught laying a lethal curse on a noble, see what happens to you.
(hint: If you're lucky they'll just feed you to some kind of a monster.)

>>20241375
The worst I've done so far was an asspull to bail out a potential recurring nemesis.

BECAUSE MY FUCKING PLAYERS KEEP KILLING LITERALLY ANY VILLAIN I GIVE EVEN A SHRED OF DEPTH TO THE MOMENT THEY'RE INTRODUCED.

>>20241287

Yep! Believe it or not, we decided out of PURE PERVERSITY to pitch this setting to this DM, just to see what sort of trainwreck he would make of it.

He was initially determined to redeem his shattered social esteem by making it work, but was only able to make it last one session.

For him, everything had to be MAGICMAGICMAGIC all the fucking time. He has no idea how to do human drama. We deliberately came up with a super low-magic setting that we thought was really interesting, and he just couldn't understand how anyone could have any adventures in a world where your average silverware set didn't get up and stab you in the back of the throat if you tried to eat with it.

We actually enjoyed that one session enormously, just watching him squirm and flailing about desperately trying to make himself look good again and failing miserably. Perverse, I know, but there it is.

>>20241416
>not introducing the villain as a recurring one
>then, once killed, having his near identical brother show up
>and again
>and again

>>20241399

We spent a lot of time pondering why anyone would ever voulentarily live in a place so terrible. It might have made sense as some sort of fantasy-Australia penal colony for evil wizards and such, especially since it was on an island, but it's just baffling, the way that he presented it.

>>20241422
TBQH get the impression you're not being entirely honest here, although the DM does seem like a shit.

>>20241349
Awful DM stories come from DM's who have conceived a GRAND ADVENTURE, and are convinced their their shit is EPIC and WORTHY OF TOLKIEN. Basically, they get wrapped up in what the players are *supposed* to do, and get angry or annoyed when players don't hold to the script in their heads, which may be Twilight-fanfiction level awful.

Good DM's weave a story around player actions, and while offering options for where the party can go next, never lose their shit because the party decided to do something not on the list of pre-plotted options. Rather than forcing player to follow the stations of the plot with no deviation whatsoever, a good DM will move plot elements around so that whatever the players do, they will appear to acquire the macguffin organically.

>>20241375

That street runs both ways. We started doing things we knew he wouldn't like right near the end as retaliation for everything he was doing.

Shortly before the elven forest was surrounded by the human army, it came under attack by a horde of orks, which was a part of the incomprehensible meta-plot. After the attack was done, our characters were inspecting some of the corpses, and he started telling us about how these orks "Sort of look a bit like they've been cross-bred with elves..."

My character described them as unusually thin and pointy-eared orks. The DM corrected me, saying "They look like they've been cross-bred with elves."

It became clear this was something that was important to his plot that we discover, acknowledge, and run with. Needless to say, not one of us ever referred to these orks as having anything remotely elven about them.

Because fuck you and your railroading.

Newdog's story made me cringe. NOTHING is more important to a good drama than economic scripting, and that is something you need to be doubly aware of in improvisational drama when you are basically guaranteed to end up wasting (metaphorical) screentime because you're making at least half of everything up as you go.

If you're reasonably certain a scene does not contribute to any plot or character arc, skip it. Dramafags should KNOW that if they're being taught in a halfway competent way.

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>>20241422

>>20241422
>We deliberately came up with a super low-magic setting that we thought was really interesting, and he just couldn't understand how anyone could have any adventures in a world where your average silverware set didn't get up and stab you in the back of the throat if you tried to eat with it.

It's funny because I have pretty much the opposite problem.

>>20241422
He's a theatre major and doesn't understand human drama? I hope he's flunking college.

>>20241775

Man, I hope so too. This is a few years ago, so I couldn't say how his life has gone since then. I wish I could say I didn't sort of hope that he did flunk and that his dreams all come to nothing. I know it's small of me.

>>20241775
I really don't know how that's possible, but apparently it is.

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>Near Chernobyl NPP.
>A team of 8 STALKERS including myself is on a job to search a lab for information.
>We enter the underground to get to the lab and we hear several Snorks roaring from a distance.
>All of the rookies we had with us leg it, one running into the tunnel instead of out of it.
> 3 people left, arms ready pointing down the dark and narrow corridor.
>Later, we find the ripped up body of the rookie who legged it, and continue on forwards.
>Reach lab, hear roars, shit pants.
>We reached the laboratory with most of the Snorks and mutated STALKERs behind us as we bar ourselves inside.
>Suddenly HUNDREDS of snorks mass outside of the small room we've locked ourselves into.
>Oh look, the laboratory had a dozen bloodsuckers inside of it.
>Oh look, the laboratory has methane gas inside of it.
>Oh look, the snorks broke down the door and started literally flooding in, dozens each second.

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>>20241861
You know Mutants aren't even THAT Common.

If there were a pack of mutant snorks there'd probably be about like 4-5 tops.

your GM is a shit. no he's not shit, he is A shit.

>>20241896
Yep, I know.
We were once sent to clear out a large infestation of Bloodsuckers.
There were three of them, and four of us. and one of my guys' arm got ripped off. We got off easy.

Here is a tale from our short-lived 4e campaign. Basically, our DM was presenting the BBEG of the campaign to us, some Goblin Warlock/Sorcerer. We encounter him leading his tribe of goblins and slay his minions while he escapes through a portal... that stays open. I jump through the portal because, hey there's nowhere else to go in this cave system, let's follow the bad guy! Of course, I end up in a dimension of pure darkness with some crazy shoggoth thing. The Goblin laughs, I get spit out of the portal and take 5d20 damage (which he rolled so poorly I barely felt it) and ended up with a nasty spell-scar. Okay... guess he wants us to go a different way.

So we make our way back through the caves, only to see the BBEG with some more minions! "Okay," I think, "he just wants us to fight him again!" There's only a short hall between us and he's not giving a BBEG speech or anything so I declare that I'm charging him to try and get a surprise round in. Of course, I pass through an invisible magical barrier made of PURE SPELLPLAGUE which does another 5d20 damage (severely wounding me this time) and making my spell-scar EVEN WORSE. And then the Goblin teleports away laughing.

To this day I do not understand why any of this happened. Was I not supposed to do the obvious thing? Am I missing something? Either way, that campaign died really quickly...

>>20241861
I haven't played enough S.T.A.L.K.E.R. but is this Strelok's first team's end near the C-Conciousness?

>>20241861
Curious, what system are you using to roleplay STALKER?

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>>20242062
When on the board we use a modified Dark Heresy.
Other times we play via Gmod, TacoNBanana has a pretty awesome Stalker roleplaying server.

Low quality picture related.

>>20242357
>not Savage STALKER

http://stalkersavageworlds.blogspot.com

you know nothing jon snow

>>20242026
No.
It's rape of the century caused by hordes of mutants accompanied by a massive gas explosion caused by muzzleflare.

>>20240291
I want to slap your GM.

>>20241434

Requesting that black jester thing.
>>20241349 needs to do something like it.

>>20242357
I helped beta test the first TacoandBanana gmod script... Wow that brings me back. I thought they dumped the Stalker code because it was too large and cluttered and made the servers derp?

This was years ago, so... Probably has changed since.

On behalf of everyone who does theater and the like, I apologize for that moron's actions Dog. If the man can't improvise his way out of a paper bag and doesn't know how to properly work pacing, his major better be related to something where he has little to no creative control. Like being a stage manager, or an ensemble cast member.

Sorry for sounding bitter, but goddamn that was absolutely painful.

Sage for a probably dead thread.

>>20245337
More of a sealed metal box than a paper bag.

There was one DM I had who would harshly penalize you if you didn't run YOUR character according to how she thought you should be running it. We had captured some prisoners and during the night one of them had somehow managed to escape, with out any of us noticing. Wishing to forstall any more escapes my Chaotic Neutral Bard hamstrung the remaining prisoner. This some how offended my character's True Neutral God so much, that I was struck by a lightning bolt from the blue. I'm still trying to figure that one out.

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>Playing GURPS for first time
>In middle school, playing with some friends and some random kids
>Group is way too large, in a 2 hour session we get maybe 2 turns
>Some random Zombie Apoc campaign.
>My character is a steampunk gentleman
>Brass legs so I weigh A FUCK TON
>Stand on zombie
>It rips in two
>Stomp its head and takes it's spine and use it as a whip
>Me and my friend try to look for supplies in rooms
>Go into closet
>My other friend kept getting really good rolls and uses alot of his skills
>GM is sick of all the side conversations and people being faggots
>Friend and I are getting fantastic rolls
>Me and friend find glowing portal
>Stick bonewhip in it
>Becomes sentient and chokes me
>Friend gets dragged under bed by Tentacle monster
>I fall into portal and spend eternity being killed over and over again
>He kills off all the characters

OKAY GUYS I THINK ITS TIME WE SPLIT INTO TWO GROUPS