Welcome to Academy City. The time is morning, the weather is pleasant and the date is July 23.You are Kyril Torikov, a Level 2 Telekinetic Child Error. Today has the potential to be productive. There is the data you managed to “acquire” from Kiyama Harumi’s office that you had to go over and you’ve found a memory specialist for Kamijou. You basically got off scot free after you ran in to Judgement yesterday so that was another plus.Preliminary reading of material suggests that the Level Upper worked through alteration of brain waves. Kaoru had suggested you watch the IPCRESS File, which was a movie from the sixties. Somehow they were related though you weren’t sure why a middle school girl younger than you would make that kind of cultural reference. Well it wasn’t like you didn’t have the time and it was supposedly a clue.Speaking of time, it was early enough that if you left now you could probably attend summer classes. They weren’t mandatory per se but it would allow you to talk to Komoe-sensei who could help you with your Ability. Plus, you’d probably get to talk to Kamijou on the way.What to do this morning?>Read Kiyama’s research>Watch the IPCRESS File>Go to summer classes
>>30328299>>Read Kiyama’s research
Information may be found here: http://padlet.com/wall/acsquareq
>>30328299>Watch the IPCRESS File
>>30328299>Read Kiyama’s research
>>30328299>>Watch the IPCRESS File
>>30328299>Go to summer classWe've put this off long enough and desperately need to narrow the power gap between us and the punks we're playing with.
>>30328299>Go to summer classes
>>30328299Summer classes
>>30328299>>Go to summer classes
You decide to read up on Kiyama’s research. It was right there and you went to great lengths to secure it after all. But before you did that, you put the kettle on the stove for some tea. With some tea brewed you sat down and slogged through the reading material. It was slow going. Kiyama’s research was full of medical jargon that you had to look up as well as references to other works that you had to look up then read. Nunotaba Shinobu, the memory expert she recommended had been referenced multiple times in Kiyama’s research. Mostly it’s about her work in implanting memories and something called Project Radio Noise.You’re running on the assumption that Kiyama was responsible for the Level Upper though. She’d have to be stupid to leave evidence that the Level Upper was her work. However, just after reading the abstract on Project Radio Noise you were able to glean her intentions. Using sound waves, and exploiting synaesthesia, she “tuned” the brain wave patterns of Level Upper users to match her own to create a network using AIM as a common protocol. From this, she would theoretically gain enough computational power to do calculate what was needed to save her students. It was an internet made of human minds that she created. Too bad the side effects were so severe.[1/2]
>>30329113It’s still an hour before lunch by the time you’re done so you could probably contact someone if you wanted to have lunch with them. Summer classes were only half a day anyway so Kamijou would be free. Or you could contact someone else.>Have lunch with Kamijou>Have lunch with someone else? (Write-in)//I just realised the auto-refresh is broken so I didn't see the new votes. I apologise if I didn't pick the right option.
>>30329151>>Have lunch with Kamijou
>>30329151>Have lunch with someone elseSee if we can find Komoe-sensei and get some training exercises we can do in our free time to raise our level.
>>30329151>Have lunch with Kamijou
>>30329151>>Have lunch with Kiyama
>>30329220I support this.
>>30329341not again
Naughty Wrenloft is voting twice. Fuck the auto-refresh is borked. Oh well, I miss pressing F5, too bad its the keyboard lights button on my laptop.Voting closed and writing.
>>30329363Me's a crowd
Well you had to give him the good news some time but it was probably best to do so in person. Plus Komoe-sensei might still be there by the time you get to the school. With a quick message, you dash out of your dorms in to the hot summer weather. By the time you arrive you’re cursing whoever put it on top of a hill too. Slopes and hot weather really didn’t mix, especially when you were in a hurry. It takes a little bit of wandering to find where Kamijou was having classes though. He was doing remedial lessons for his lack of System Scan progress. It was what the “Three Idiots” of your high school did. Thankfully it looked like they were wrapping up and it was Kamijou that greeted you at the door.“Hey, Torikov, good to see you again,” he was likely eager for the good news.“You too, though I am a bit hungry so how about we talk over lunch?” you suggest, “And maybe if possible could I talk to Komoe-sensei as well?”“Torikov-kun is it?” the tiny teacher appears behind Kamijou’s legs, “Is there a question you would like to ask me?”“Well our talk might take a while so I was hoping we could have lunch together,” you invite her as well, “It’s about my ability development.”Komoe-sensei thinks about it.“How about lunch at my place then?” she asks, “Otherwise I’m afraid I’m going to have to decline.”>Lunch at her place>Just ask her a quick question (ask one question)
>>30329720>Lunch at her place
>>30329720>Lunch at her placeand drink her booze. Drink her under the table!
There wasn’t a reason Kamijou would refuse either so the three of you get in Komo-sensei’s car. Kamijou of course does not stop from commenting on how small his homeroom teacher is and how she is able to drive. Sensei of course scolds him and shows that, yes, her Suzuki Wagon R has been modified so that she can drive it safely. It was also as pink as her hair. You really didn’t have a damn thing against Kei cars but somehow you don’t want to be caught dead riding in this one so you sort scrunch up in the back as Kamijou claims the passenger seat next to his teacher.Komoe sensei lives on the top floor of a two-storey apartment complex and her room isn’t too big. It is filled with beer and fags though. Still she invites Kamijou and you in without reservation. Kamijou apparently starts making lunch immediately which left you time to talk with his teacher first. Of course she’s already cracked open a beer and you move to help yourself before she glares cutely at you.“You’re still under age,” she says.Your rebuttal?>”I can drink you under the table!”>”I’ve had harder stuff.”>”Nevermind then, I have some questions.”
>>30330241>”I’ve had Vodka. A little beer won't do much.”
>>30330241>”I can drink you under the table!”I don't mind losing
>>30330241>>”I can drink you under the table!”Bet money. Or grades!
>>30330241>”I can drink you under the table!”And when she's out, we steal some of her cigarettes.
>>30330241Let's be honest here. Is underage drinking really the worst thing that AC does?They probably pump 8 year olds full of stuff way worse than beer as standard procedure for the ability development curriculum.
>>30330241>”I can drink you under the table!”
>>30330241Why does she have homosexual men in her home
>>30330433HeyDon't judgeShe likes to watch.
>>30330433Just in case you're not just making the same lame joke I almost made and really don't know, fags is a term used for cigarettes.
>>30330477It was joke honorable anon
>>30330241>”I can drink you under the table!”>”I’ve had harder stuff.”"Something this weak may as well be water."
>The Japanese generally hate Russians>Think of them as "Basically niggers, but white instead">Kyril constantly reinforces alcoholic stereotype
>>30330611>Basically niggers, but white>Implying they are wrong.Though I think the biggest difference Is Kyril acts like those guys down my block. Get drunk as shit but don't start shit with your neighbors. Instead start shit with the local thugs in the alley ways.
>>30330611I thought Japan looked down on everyone that wasn't Japanese
>>30330731They do.
>>30330731Except Germans.
>>30330793Why? because they were buddy buddy during WWII?
You weren’t exactly a paragon of eloquence when you shouted out,“I can drink you under the table!”You were making clear that you have had experience with alcohol already. She doesn’t seem convinced though. Time to up the ante.“I’ll attend all your summer lectures if I lose,” it is now that she wavers so you press the attack, “Just imagine all the good it’ll do me. No going out and acting like my delinquent self.”She’s gnashing her teeth now, her mind is arguing with itself. You can practically see it. One more push should do it.“This might even be a good lesson in excessive drinking.”It’s there that she crumbles. The fact that you just conned her in to being able to drink alcohol was of course tossed aside in favour of the upcoming contest. Scurrying about, she makes a pile of cans before allowing you to take one. With nonchalance, you telekinetically pull one towards your hand before pulling the tab. Without a prior signal the race is one. For her small size she downs one rather quickly with no obvious signs. Yet. You on the other hand finish yours in good time. It is but one of many.Kamijou finally serves lunch once you’re both through a whole six-pack. You’re starting to feel it and you’re pretty sure Komoe-sensei’s cheeks were redder than they were earlier.“Um, lunch?” he aims to interrupt.>In it to win it (1d20)>Call it a draw, you will resume after lunch>Admit defeat, you need to be sober for questions
>>30330783But they're just hillbilly offshoots of the Chinese. their early culture was just them trying to be Chinese as possible.
>>30330814Because the Germans made them honorary whites after they kicked the shit outta Russia that one time.
>>30330731They do if you believe 4chan and 2chan
>>30330731Depends on who you're talking to. There is a group of westboos around those nations. I remember one group that collects 1960 hotrods. They also in general won't admit they dislike their boss if their boss is some white/black guy. Problem is when you try to get citizenship and need to grow wings out of your ass and pretty much will never be considered part of the society by anyone no matter what you do. That and you'll pretty much be considered a nigger while wandering the streets.Pretty funny actually I've seen Jap cops look over and see a friend of mine walking the streets causing him to literally turn around and go patrol somewhere else.
>>30330822>>In it to win it (1d20)
Rolled 13>>30330822>In it to win it (1d20)
Rolled 20>>30330822>In it to win it (1d20)
Rolled 1>>30330822>>In it to win it (1d20)
Rolled 17>>30330883BOOM BABY!>>30330889YOU FUCKER!>>30330822
>>30330883>>30330889Wait, what does this mean?
Rolled 16>>30330822>>In it to win it (1d20)For the Booze!
>>30330917They cancel out.
>>30330841>That and you'll pretty much be considered a nigger while wandering the streets.>The realization of being white in yellow land is like how niggers are treated by you in white land
>>30330937yes, racism is magical
>>30330861With this, we fail.
Rolled 10>>30330917Oh this'll be fun.
>>30331141is that a win?
>>30331160Pyrrhic victory
>>30331534>She passes out>We go vomit for a half hour.
Rolled 1You didn’t come this far to lose now. You’re quite sure that was your last coherent thought as the contest continues. As far as you’re aware you’re still doing fine, slightly tipsy but fine. Lunch helped and you imagine the smirk on your face when Komoe-sensei wakes up with a massive hangover and to find out you beat her, 13 cans to her 10. It’s a bit of a shame that you wouldn’t be able to talk to her about your Telekinesis though. Kamijou is of course looking at you funny.“You okay?” he asks warily.“I am perfectly fine,” you assure, “so, good news first or bad news first?”“Er, how about the good news first? I hardly get any.”“Alright, good news then,” you find your voice to be louder than normal, “I found you a memory specialist! Are you interested in meeting with her? Oh what am I saying, of course you are.”“So what’s the bad news then?” he asks.You throw up on him.You spend the next hour cleaning Komoe-sensei’s apartment. By the time you’re done it is late afternoon. Not wishing to further try your luck, the both of you leave quietly before your teacher wakes up though not without leaving detailing your victory of course.[1/2]
>>30331769It is then that you decide to call up Nunotaba Shinobu.“はい, Kyril Torikov I presume,” she greets you.“I suppose you’ve heard about me from Kiyama-sensei.”“I am free to talk today,” she then inexplicable switches to English partway, “しっかっし, I am only free today and you must see as soon as possible or we may never meet again. You may bring one other person with you.”“Well it’s not really me who wants to see you,” you start.“よい, it does not matter who you send.”>Accompany Kamijou hold his hand>Kamijou’s a big boy nowNote: This pic is for the previous post damn it
>>30331808go with Kamijou. Don't hold hands
>>30331808>Kamijou’s a big boy now.part of being a shounen protagonist is standing on your own.
>>30331808>Accompany Kamijou>Hold hands>Sensually massage his fingers
>>30331845Seconded.
>>30331808>Accompany Kamijou hold his hand
>>30331808>Kamijou’s a big boy now
You also had some questions for her so you agree to meet up at a coffee house in fifteen minutes. However, it is now you realise that Komoe-sensei lives really far from your destination if you were going to make it on time. Looks like you were going to have to run and fast. Without thinking too much about it, you grab Kamijou by the hand and started hoofing it. People weren’t looking at you too much simply because going in the opposite direction was a young man in a white bandana and shirt with a red rising sun on them. He too was dragging someone along who also happened to be male but wore glasses. Bandana guy gave you a knowing smile and a thumbs up as you passed each other.You weren’t late much, only a few minutes, by the time you arrived. She’s already reserved a table and you move to join her despite your need for air. Kamijou is in better shape though his face was flushed. You meet her eyes as she allows you to catch your breath and when you do she speaks,“いぜ, we begin first, we must discuss payment,” she starts her sentence in English again, “This consultation shall not be free. Pay upfront and we can discuss important matters. そうでなければ, you will just have to make do with enjoying my company. Who would like to go first?”>Kamijou>Yourself
>>30332509>>Yourself
>>30332509>YourselfI don't want sloppy seconds.
>>30332509>>YourselfKamijou is perma-broke yes?
>>30332509>Kamijou
>>30332586IF Heaven Canceller can't help him, this gal surely can't.
>>30332509Just making sure I'm not retarded first, but this choice is for who pays?
>>30333051You're both paying for information. It's just a matter of who goes first for his.
Kamijou still wasn’t looking in the face so you volunteered yourself first. You also order some tea, both for yourself and Kamijou.“そう. Then my price is that you fulfil a simple request.”Your tea arrives just as you like and your offer of tea for Kamijou is strangely ignored. There is no need for you to tell her to continue.“Kaiou University is in breach of a contract of confidentiality with me. They are unlawfully using my research data and my requests for them to stop have been ignored. I need you to physically remove the data from their servers and return it to me before the end of the first week of August. ただし, if you accept this request, know that you will be graduating from petty thievery and enter the big leagues. I will give you help up to a point but this must be done by you. Take some time to think on it.”Then she turns to Kamijou and talks to him. He wasn’t out of it though you do not him trying very hard to ignore your looking his way. Her price for him was simpler than yours, just a simple request for aid when the time comes. With his acceptance she launches in to an explanation of how the human memory works especially someone with eidetic memory. It was exactly the kind of information he was looking for.“そう,” she starts, “have you come to a decision Torikov?”>I’ll do it>Nope>Negotiate (write-in)
>>30332509>KamijouHis is more important than ours. And something's probably going to happen before the second one gets his.
>>30333305Is she autistic?
>>30333305>I’ll do itMaan, she racist. Just cause we Russian we gotta go down the master criminal career path.Sheeeit.
>>30333305>>I’ll do it
>>30333305>I’ll do it>>30333363Yeah, not like we've broken into any buildings or assaulted and robbed anyone.What's her deal?
>>30333343Possibly. She like speaking one English word then the rest of her sentence in Japanese.
>>30333363>>30333381>>30333421Why are we doing it? I thought we didn't need her help with anything
>>30333507I...Huh.Oh yeah.
>>30333507Actually... yeah, why are we doing this?
>>30333507/tg/_decision_making.jpg
>>30333526>>30333546Uhh... Can we just ask her to pay us?
>>30333546I thought we were doing this to help Touma. Only, all we needed from her was just to provide some info on brain stuff to convince the magicians to back off. Right?
>>30333507>>30333526>>30333546>>30333587>>30333590Idiots.She's referenced in Kiyama’s NOT!Level upper research. That's what we're asking her about.Are you all really that bad at remembering things that just happened?
>>30333590Touma payed for his separately with a promise.We have no reason to help her.
>>30333619Yes.Yes I am.
>>30333619I don't remember anything in quest that links her to level up.She didn't work on it in canon, so unless she's going off the rails, she has nothing we want.q
>>30333629>>30333684Everyone just wants an excuse to get involved in lv6 shift.I know that I want to see what happens if we create a force moving away from Accelerator's eyeball inside of his reflection field.
>>30333684See>>30329113There's a chance that she knows about things related to it's development. We're here to confirm that.>She didn't work on it in canonSo you're using what you know of source material to stop us from making what are otherwise rational decisions?Do you know how that sounds?
>>30333684Her work served as inspiration for Kiyama.>>30333749I'd suggest against fighting Accelerator.
>>30333749He would vector it away of course.
>>30333955Kihara could punch him in the face. Spontaneously creating outward force within his reflection field would be far easier than bullshit reverse punch.
>>30333994That entire thing was utter bullshit though. Mathematically speaking Kihara would need to be punching faster then light to do what he did. That entire scene was pretty much plot to nerf accelerator.
>>30334063Yeah, it was pretty bullshit.But TK starting in the field -should- work. There is no need for a direction change, therefore at least one hit will get through.Though if it doesn't knock him out, welcome to die.
>>30334131Nah the main issue is 11th dimension movement can't get into his field or dark matter for that matter and if that can't get in I can't see creating force somewhere getting in.
>>30334220Teleporting (11th dimensional movement) doesn't work because his field extends into the 11th dimension. An object that teleports just enters the 11th dimension, moves towards his field, hits the field and gets bounced back to the starting spot in the 11th dimension, making it look like there was no teleport at all. TK doesn't work on that same principle. There is no movement into the field, it starts inside it. And Kakine never created the dark matter inside the field. He always just created it outside and tried to hit Accel with it, which worked once but then Accel learned how to stop it immediately. Both teleporting and dark matter never started inside the field, they both started outside and moved in. They aren't really good examples of why this would fail.Anyway, I'm 99.99999999999999999% sure that creating TK in the field wouldn't work or would get countered fast because Accel is bullshit, but I just wanna see what the QM comes up with to explain it. It would probably get through once, Accel learns how to stop it by setting his whitelist settings to ignore outward forces that start inside the field, and then kill us. But that's assuming that no telekinetic ever tried this before, and one probably did.
Maybe you were still sauced, maybe you really wanted to know more about the Level Upper or maybe deep down you were hooked on that feeling when you committed a near-perfect crime. Regardless you accepted. You’d do what she asked for more information on her work regarding memory and Project Radio Noise. After all, it served as an inspiration for Kiyama Harumi. You start by giving her an overview of the Level Upper.“It is a rank S project,” she started, “だから, what I’m going to tell you is the researcher-friendly version only. From the clones that we made, we discovered that they shared the same brain wave pattern. Coupled with their Electromaster Ability, they were able to easily establish a network amongst themselves to share and calculate data. They even allow the sharing of experience. The originator of the clones could theoretically be part of the network but due to the cancellation of Project Radio Noise we never tested that, among other things. あたし, worked on the memory imprinting through Testament though so I do not know much.”“Why does it feel like I’m missing something here?” Kamijou pipes up, “Wasn’t your request basically stealing something?”>Give him the Cliff notes version>Give him the whole spiel>”Worry about your problems first.”
>>30334484>>Give him the whole spiel
>>30334484>Give him the whole spiel
>>30334484>>Give him the whole spielnigga loves speeches and sad stories
>>30334484>Give him the whole spiel>Ask fish-eyes something"So I know that AC can get kinda sketchy with experiments, but on a scale of 1 to hellish nightmare, just how bad is whatever this is? Cause 'human clones' + 'experiment' sounds iffy."
And thus a relation pf mutual cooperation between main characters begins
>>30334445Yeah the biggest issue is I'm pretty sure his vectors defend against things just poping up like that.
>>30334649Hurray!
>>30334721It all depends on his calculation power though, right?Isn't it possible to overwhelm it by having too many things to factor?
>>30334721>his vectorsI think you mean his whitelist settings, but yes. He probably already dealt with it once and set his auto-reflection list to handle cheeky telekinetics.>>30334805Not for Kyril. Maybe if we hijacked the Calculate Fortress that Crowley lives in and somehow wired ourselves to it, but other than that no way.
>>30334922Does his 'auto reflect' include radiation?We gonna hide uranium under his bed, foolproof
>>30335072It does.
How about something that completely poisons a large area around him, meaning he won't have enough time to escape or ventilate the area. (like Misaka was trying to do, but you know, not half assed)
I think the best way to deal with Accelerator is to not be anywhere fucking near him.
Why are we event trying to kill Accelerator? Just throw Touma at him.Hell, throw Touma at him literally with telekinesis the speed boost might help him.
You’ve just realised now that you’ve never actually talked to Kamijou about your involvement with the Graviton Bombings and the Level Upper. Hell, he was probably too busy gallivanting with magicians to spare you a thought. Now that you actually had time, you could talk him about what was going on lately. You tell him, from the top, of your promise, of your struggles and of your findings.“That brings me here, to confirm the main suspect of the Level Upper-induced incidents,” you finish theatrically, “Now, all that’s left is to bring her in.”“So you’ve assisted some punks in beating up a girl then beat up more punks with said girl then robbed a research facility of possibly classified data and you’ve just now agreed to rob more data from a university just so that you move one step closer to the one responsible for your friend’s condition. All in the name of justice right? Well that can’t be right can it?”“Why don't we put that into perspective?” you turn to Nunotaba, “Take Academy City for instance, on a scale of 1 to hellish nightmare, just how bad was Radio Noise, because 'clones' + 'experiment' sounds iffy to me.”“However bad it was, it doesn’t compare to my last project,” she answers.“I’m not the worst guy out there by a long shot,” you conclude.“You’re right,” he concludes, “given my luck I’ll probably stumble on some real fucked up shit.”Aw man now’s he’s all gloomy.>Cheer up, IT’S MOVIE NIGHT>Cheer up, if you ever need me just call>Cheer up (write-in)
>>30335156alternatively, we act as the distraction so that Touma gets up behind him and knocks him out
>>30335179>Cheer up, if you ever need me just callit always pays to have shady Russian on speed dial
>>30335087Well not all radiation, as he can still see. Maybe if we used a high-powered laser in the visible spectrum.
>>30335179And I forgot the image again.>>30335114Note that Accelerator nearly suffocated by being in the centre of a flour explosion he created.
>>30335179>Cheer up, if you ever need me just callMovie night?>>30335156It's not about trying to kill him, it's about the mental gymnastics needed to find 'viable plans' to kill someone who's way too overpowered.Just fun theory tiem
>>30335179>>Cheer up, IT’S MOVIE NIGHT
>>30335211So what, we throw a truckload o' sugar at him then light a match?
>>30335215We don't necessarily have to watch the IPCRESS File but it's tangentially related.
>>30335247just have an HIV positive person seduce him
>>30335265Oh rightwe should invite him to watch it?
Actually Bored, can Touma be thrown with telekinesis or does his Imagine Breaker prevent him from being picked up?If I recall, Koroko couldn't teleport him but we could just "grab" ever part of him but his right arm.
>>30335179>Cheer up, IT’S MOVIE NIGHT
>>30335275I wonder why /a/ never though of that. It's not like he'd refuse buttsex from Touma, probably. Given Touma's luck he'd probably have all STDs known to man.>>30335333Well I'd rather not influence votes more than I already have eh?
>>30335179>Cheer up, IT’S MOVIE NIGHT>And if ya ever need anything, gimme a call!>Throw an arm over his shoulder and maybe a cheesy thumbs up
>>30335367I only voted the other one cause it seemed like a more cheery thing to say.But I still think he should know about the movie thing.
>>30335404
>>30335404Right'o, changing to this.
>>30335367>Touma>STDsEverybody knows that his right hand would negate the curses God puts on the lustful.
>>30335428>he's immune to aidsoh god
>>30335404Bro as fuck
>>30335404This.
>>30335275>Seducing>AccelAhahaha. Accelerator is so asexual he probably couldn't get a boner if he tried.
>>30335532Didn't he say something about his powers reflecting away sunlight, making him albino and fucking up his hormones?Maybe that's why he was so angsty.
>>30335567uv
>>30335360I think personally it should work decently well unless his hand touches. Biggest issue is his hand would touch and null it pretty fast.For fighting Touma the best method would be to get in a brawl. Since unlike most of his foes Kyril can punch. The rest would be doing things like punching his back with TK because of how hard it would be to reach behind fast enough to block.But this is all conjecture.
>>30335532He's a lolicon in the closet
>>30335624additionally, it would be best for Touma to use his right hand and get a firm hold of Accelerator while using his other hand to punch the guy out.
You wrap your arm around his shoulder. He flinches visible from the contact but you continue regardless.“Cheer up, if ever need me just call alright?”He still looks uncomfortable so you change tack.“Besides, I’m having a movie night tonight with the guys,” you say as you are moving your arm away to gesticulate wildly.“Heh,” he still sounds uncomfortable, “Just a question though.”“Shoot.”“You’re not overly physical like this all the time right?”“No why?”“Nothing,” he answers quickly as if sighing in relief, “I’ll be there, what are we watching?”“A spy movie called the IPCRESS File. A friend recommended it to me.”Nunotaba only had a ghost of a smile on her lips as you chatted back and forth with Kamijou.Episode 8 End. It is now time for the customary interlude.>Metal Dean Rising>CSI: Academy City I
>>30335872>>Metal Dean Rising
>>30335872>Metal Dean Rising
>>30335872>Metal Dean RisingCan't fuckin' resist.
>>30335872>Metal Dean Risingdoes Asuak giving tutoring on the rules of Nature?
>>30335872>“You’re not overly physical like this all the time right?”>“No why?”>“Nothing,” he answers quickly as if sighing in relief, “I’ll be there, what are we watching?”hu hu hu>Metal Dean Rising
>>30335872I don't know why Metal Dean Rising sounds like porn to me
>>30335925Don't worry, there's a joke here that I want to explore.>>30335935Swords are phallic by nature
>>30335955>there's a joke here that I want to explore.This can either end really well or really badly. or somehow both
>>30335996I can't promise you'll find it funny but I certainly will.
>>30335872>Metal Dean RisingThis reminds me we really should invite the dictator somewhere soon. She could be useful when we need to beat some fool down.
>>30336026I am scared and aroused.
>>30336124I'm pro having another date with hershe seems like a nice girl, beating thugs and all that
>>30336124totally. its been long enough to make us not seem desperate or clingy. and Judgement (or that annoying lesbian) is probably watching us.Doubt she's be into grand larceny etc though
>>30336264Yeah. I mainly mean when we need to beat down someone again. That or just have tea but I don't think it's a good idea to have one without the other.
>>30336264>shirai kurokoWe should pull a Kojou and de/u/fy her
>>30336264Soon comes the time for GTA: Academy City Stories
>>30336496No Touma! I don't to go fucking bowling.>>30336453I dunno man. I don't think we can perform miracles...
A sword is a weapon. A long sword is a special type of sword. The Dean however, is unique. It may hold many descriptors but amongst them all, it is it’s concept of creation that is most unique. Unlike other more glamorous swords of myth and legend, The Dean was meant for a simple woman of a simple persuasion. This was not a sword for kings or heroes. This was a sword that was the life and blood of its owner. The Dean shall teach her, guide her, support her and from the moment that she finds peace with herself, it shall allow her to attain,>True strength>Flawless skill>Immortality
>>30336694>Flawless skill
>>30336694>>Flawless skill
>>30336694> ImmortalityWhy the fuck not
>>30336694>Immortality
>>30336694>>Flawless skillsharp skillshap blade
>>30336413"How do you take your tea Kyril?""two sugars, a dash of cream, and the blood of my enemies...and I chase it with some vodka"
>>30336264>its been long enough to make us not seem desperate or clingy.It's been, what, three days since the date?
>>30336694>ImmortalityWhy not?
Because it shall grant her Flawless Skill and was designed for a woman to wield it took the shape of a long sword. Of all the other options considered, this was the best form for her to display prowess and both cutting her enemies down and proving her point to unfashionable objectors. The blade is a full metre long in the shape of diamond with a fine point and a razor’s edge. Its hilt itself is much shorter than many others, expecting a woman to have a smaller grip laying in that only twenty centimetres protected by a simple cross-guard. In fact, if anything could be said about The Dean it would be that it looked like a simple unadorned sword. The pommel is the only indulgence here as it is,>Set with a round ruby of purity>The shape of a holy orb>Designed like a mace
>>30337242>>Designed like a maceblunt objects are strong against the undead
>>30337242>Set with a round ruby of purity
>>30337242>Designed like a mace
>>30337242>The shape of a holy orb
>>30337242>>Set with a round ruby of purity
It is the pommel that is the root of The Dean. Thus it was not unusual for it to be in the design of a mace. The sword would wholly be a weapon and The Dean had been made whole. Wrapping the hilt was a leather that was most unusual for it was white. Once gripped The Dean would never fully escape the grasp of the woman that wielded it, not while she still drew breath and had the will to fight. Iron may be its base but its body is steel. The ratio was perfect from the start though that may not be the only the only extraordinary thing about it. For the material itself beggared belief, coming from a,>Meteor that fell in an age long past>A block of cold iron that has never once known heat>Technique that had come before its time
>>30337495>>Meteor that fell in an age long past
>>30337495>Technique that had come before its time
>>30337495>A block of cold iron that has never once known heat
>>30337495>Meteor that fell in an age long pastMETEOOOR SWOOOOOOORD!
>>30337495>Meteor that fell in an age long pastSuddenly alien metal
>>30337495>Melted down Toyota Hilux
>>30337495>>30337620>Meteor that fell in an age long pastSpace Earth!
>>30337626>Implying you can melt a Hilux
>>30337784inb4howIsAHiluxMade?
I wish nintendium was a choice
The fateful smith of The Dean, its very maker, was a young Helvetian man by the name of Jean-François Maupin de Genève. He was born in the last half of the sixteenth century, the dying days of long swords before he was put through his education. The trade that he learned was to be a smith, like his father and his ancestors before him. Unlike them however, he grew up as the long sword design became unpopular and was the last few remaining smiths to ever have bothered to learn how to fashion one from iron and steel. It was because of this that his client had come to him to fashion a sword that would then become The Dean. Supplied by his client with meteoric iron from an age long past, Jean-François set out to create the last great long sword of his time before the art was forever lost. In his smith he,>Sweated tirelessly, working countless days>Lost his blood, but imparting his soul>Shed many tears, for it was his maître d’
>>30337991>>Lost his blood, but imparting his soul
>>30337991>>Shed many tears, for it was his maître d’Are you sure that it was his waiter?
>>30337991I seem to have fucked up my post, I meant to write chef d'oeuvre
>>30337991>Shed many tears, for it was his maître d’
>>30337784Good point. I guess the blade could be made by using other Hiluxes (Hiluxi? Hili? Hiluxen?) to break apart one Hilux into a suitably sized piece, then sharpening it with Nokia's.
>>30338035This. A dying breed's masterpiece sounds grand.
>>30337991>quenched it in his precious bodily fluids
>>30338126And set in a hilt made of nintendium?
>>30337991>>Lost his blood, but imparting his soul>implying he didn't lose his waiter and impart his masterpiece
Looks like two options won. I can combine this!
Pouring his body and soul, he created the master piece of a dying breed. There was no denying how the depth of which The Dean seemed to possess and the simplicity of which was known was akin to perfection itself. It would be many years before The Dean finally drew blood for the first time. It was in a duel between the lady of a minor house in Bern and a visiting countess from the faraway Hungary. To the victor was the spoils and it was the countess who carried the day and The Dean away from her opponent’s steaming corpse. From there the rumours of a fierce Hungarian mistress who ruled from her seat in the Carpathians spread. Many came for her, few left intact and whole for she was a fearsome warrior unparalleled in a sword that by all means was outdated. Thus the Dean became a rare, blooming wild flower at the peak of an unreachable mountain. She watered The Dean in the blood of,>Treacherous country men>Heretical Ottomans >Barbaric Poles
>>30338513>Heretical Ottomans HERETICS
>>30338513>>Treacherous country men
>>30338513>Heretical Ottomans Must Remove Kebab
>>30338513>Heretical Ottomans
>>30338513>Heretical Ottomansfuck foot rests
>>30338646>Using heretic on /tg/>Expecting them to kill anything elseWhat is this, Chaos?
>>30338670>tfw you're one of the 6 people on /tg/ that doesn't play 40k
For more than half a century she would protect her realm from the Ottomans to the South. They were not the only ones she slew but it was from them that The Dean awakened. It awoke to sentience. For all her skill and those she slew there was one enemy that she could not combat. Death took her in sleep they say for they feared The Dean and its master would slay the reaper itself were she able. Upon her death she had gifted it a distant relation in Russia. But she was not to be its master, the owner and the sword both knew it. Knowing there was to be no glory had, she and her descendents kept it until 1860, the year of the Treaty of Peking. Little more than a treasured family heirloom at that point The Dean set out to the Far East with a plucky daughter. However, several generations passed as The Dean languished. When it was over, The Dean awoke in an age of warfare utterly alien to itself. Fortune however would save it when it went to battle against an enemy who still used swords. Though its master then was not a woman, its edge was still sharp and its body unmarred by rust. He fought valiantly, abandoned by his cowardly comrades as he roared a challenge. His foe answered with a sword of his own. It possessed a wicked curve yet broke upon The Dean’s unyielding metal. In his dying breaths, the last son of that distant countess surrendered his weapon’s history.[1/2]
Heem sleepy?
>>30339390In recognition and respect his foe would forever maintain the blade. Our family have never touched a katana since then. And now, I gift this to you, Kudou Asuka, our only daughter. Perhaps the old blade shall find you a worthy master in this day and age. May it protect you on your journey through life.Thus was the history that The Dean remembers and will remember forever. But that is not where it ends for there was yet another story to tell. It disembarks with its master in a resplendently walled city.“Come Dean, let us find some trouble,” those were the first words she spoke to it that day.It already liked her then and had a feeling she was going to be something special.Interlude complete. God I'm tired. Check the twitter.https://twitter.com/BoredofDirectorBrace yourself. Go out fight, go out young. Do you think you can handle it? When writefag and /tg/ meet, the story begins.Would love thoughts about the padlet wall if anyone reads it. Might open it to commenting later if anyone wants.
>>30339501>The sword is actually magic
>>30339559To borrow the words of someone famous,Hahaha.
>>30339501thanks for running sleepy British man.I wonder what Dean thinks of Kyril?
>>30339635>Bored of Directors>BritishPick one and only one
>>303396701
>>30339670sleepy European man better?
>>30339694Clever git. I'll update the wall tomorrow (which would be Thursday for me). Good night unto you all.
