>it continues

Stare that fucker down.

>>35645513
>>Throw shit
Fucking Magpies. Y'know what, just set the tree on fire.

>>35645513
>Stare it down

>>35645513
>>Stare it down

>>35645513
>>Just keep walking it's just a magpie, fuck

File: Autralian Nichijou.jpg (357 KB, 700x1769)

357 KB JPG

>>35645513
>>Just keep walking it's just a magpie, fuck

Gotta watch for those other cunts

>>35645513
>Just keep walking it's just a magpie, fuck

>>35645513
RUN BOY RUN!
don't fuck with a maggy

>>35645513
throw shit

>>35645513
>other
Crush it with our mind powers.

>>35645513
>>Throw shit
Fuck that magpie

I wonder what a Kiwi Quest would be
> Wake up
> Take a hit from the bong
> Go to Maccas
> Throw coins at the Hobo outside
> Smoke a J with your mates
> Mung out for the rest of the day
> Go back to Maccas
> Pull some Buckeys
> Get more Maccas
> Take a hit from the bong again before going to sleep

>>35645580
you forgot

>Fuck your bru's sheep

>>35645513
>Yell abuse

Fuck it's tied up, too close for my shitty tablet to call. Which one is winning?

>>35645605
keep walking m8

>>35645605
your mum

>>35645613
Righto

>>35645513
>Just keep walking it's just a magpie, fuck

>>35645605

ya ded m8?

>>35645744
His internet is apparently being shit

>>35645744
posting issues.

File: nz.jpg (203 KB, 952x629)

203 KB JPG

>>35645580
OP has inspired me to start working on one

>>35645790
I'd play it.

You hold your hands out in a "come at me" gesture. The magpie cocks its head. Cheeky fucker. You turn and keep walking, and it only swoops you one time on your way around the corner. Fucking birds. It's only a few minutes later that you run into some friends of yours, specifically the guy who held the mad party you went to last night.

"Hey Ross!" Yells Fred, the host. "Didn't see ya at school today. Were you hungover mate? Or maybe you were just fuckin' your boyfriend!" The group laughs at this.
"Nah I was doing your mum all day!" You call back as you jog to catch up with them. Fred grins and everyone else laughs. Josh, the leader of this little group, grabs you round the neck when you get near.
"So youse was off bein' a mad cunt all day aye?" Josh asks. "Got a text from Yobbo, says he saw youse hangin' out with Gemma Mayne all day. You got a piece of that or what?"

>Brag about it
>"So what if I did?"
>Nah, they don't need to know

>>35645820
>"So what if I did?"

>>35645820
they don't need to know

>>35645820
>Nah, they don't need to know

>>35645820
>"So what if I did?"
"wouldn't tell ya if i did, Ya mum'll get jealous."

File: partys over.gif (1.9 MB, 360x202)

1.9 MB GIF

>>35645790
I would imagine it more like this.

>>35645820
brag about it!

>>35645820
>>Nah, they don't need to know

>>35645820
>>35645848
Second

>>35645848
Third.

>>35645848
aye, this

>>35645820
>Brag about it

>>35645848
Supporting.

Awwwww shit Aussie quest. Fuck studying for hsc, that's for fags anyway.

>>35645790
There should be a stove in the background with some knivesk

>>35645848
Seconding

>>35645903
yeh fuck TEE

>>35645931
My non-abo brother. Also, cunt, hurry the fuck up

File: 1383402432781.jpg (168 KB, 550x512)

168 KB JPG

>>35645931

Fuckin TAFE for days cunts

>>35645848

You ain't mates if you can't talk shit about fucking their Mum

"Well if I did, I couldn't tell ya, because you'd tell ya mum and ya mum'd get jealous." Everyone laughs at that, and they move on to other topics. Your phone buzzes in your pocket.
"Gemma - i finaly got my breath bak :) daaaaaammmmmmm ur a gud fuk. cum again ny time u lyk ;)"
You'll definitely have to hit her up again.

The topic with the boys has gone on to last night's party. "Oi Ross," says Josh. "What did ya think of the party last night? Was it tight or what?"
"Not enough chicks mate. Good grog and good weed, but not enough chicks."
"Oi there were chicks there."
"Yeah but they're all taken, don't wanna get into a fight that much, be too much effort."
"Alright then. So whatta youse doin this arvo? We gonna go down to The Spot?"

>Yeah I'll come to The Spot
>Nah I was gonna head home
>Other

>>35646059

> Say wanna get home
> Text gemma instead
> Fuck inna bushes m8

>>35646059
the spot

>>35646059

>Yeah I'll come to The Spot

We aren't shit cunts that go home after school.

>>35646072
dis.

>>35646059
go get a Bacon Deluxe from the HJ's first, before The Spot

I live in Australia and I'm struggling to understand some of these

>>35646059
Go rob some rich fucker, buy bomb weed, get a root

>>35646101
what are you a pooftah

>>35646101
Don't worry, its a good thing really. Means you don't speak bogan.

>>35646101

Spotted the immigrants

>>35646059
>Get some grog and ciggies
>Yeah I'll come to The Spot
>>35646096
I'm puking already. Even Macca's is better.

>>35646101
Shiiiit mate, go sit on public transport doing a loop for a day. Or just get some public school education

>>35646101
I live in Aus and understand everything I'm doing a bachelors
>>35646059
Go to the spot

>>35646096
Mate. Disapointed mate. Did your dad raise you to be a poofter?

>>35646072
seconding this

>>35646059
Let's go stick it in Gema again, make sure she can't walk straight this time.

"Yeah I'll come to The Spot, but let's go down to the strip first and go for a servo run or something, see if we can score some smokes or grog."
"Fuckin' good idea Ross," says Josh. "I know I'm the big boy of our group yeah, but Ross, youse probably the smartest out of us. Honestly youse could be like Prime Minister or somethin. Be like Tony Abbott and go and sink some immigrant boats yeah? I'd vote for ya."
Everyone else says they'd vote for you too.
"Nah I'm not that smart. I'm pretty shit in school."
"That's because you never come. When you show up for tests even if you don't study you still get like B's and shit. I wish I didn't have ta study, y'know? I could just go out be a mad cunt and fuck bitches all night like you."

>Play it off. Yeah whatever you say, Josh.
>Protest. That isn't true, you're not smart at all. That's for gays.

>>35646218
>Play it off. Yeah whatever you say, Josh.
proceed to spin out a good yarn

File: 721_04.gif (1.22 MB, 318x196)

1.22 MB GIF

>>35646218
>Tony Abbott joke

>>35646218
Nah, fuckya, here's the trick. English exams? Smoke Bella weed. Math? That's for homos. Science? Beat up that one sped kid and take his pills. Drugs, man.

>>35646246
Hella weed. Fuckin phones miright?

File: 1383402811183.jpg (51 KB, 300x370)

51 KB JPG

>>35646218

>Play it off. Yeah whatever you say, Josh.

>>35646246
Can testify to weed before english

>>35646218
>>Play it off. Yeah whatever you say, Josh.

>>35646218
>>Play it off. Yeah whatever you say, Josh.

>>35646127
maccas is awesome

"Yeah, yeah, alright, whatever you say Josh."
"Nah Ross seriously mate, you're like-"
"Josh. I said it's good. You sound like you love me or something."
"Yeah I love you Ross. Youse my mate and me bro, mate. I'm a wog and wogs love their bros."
"That's a bit gay, idnit?" Asks Fred.
"Nah Fred, you just gotta be multicultural aye? Us wogs know."

You and the boys walk down to the main road, where The Strip is. There's the usual butchers, bakery, fish and chips shop, corner store and shit like that. Then there's the Plaza, with a Woolies, a drive in Maccas and HJs, a Dominos, a bottlo and lastly the servo. The Plaza's full of kids who just got off school, and adults going about their afternoon shopping.

"Oi, I'm going to HJs to get a Bacon Deluxe," says Fred. "You wankers gonna come with?"
"HJs is shit bro," says Dave, one of the others. "Just come Maccas."

>Head to Maccas
>Go to HJs
>Try and score grog at the bottlo. One of you has a fake ID.
>Other

>>35646360
>>Try and score grog at the bottlo. One of you has a fake ID.

>>35646360
>>Try and score grog at the bottlo. One of you has a fake ID.

>>35646360
Get some grog. Jim beam, drink of champions. Send some poofta off to get some thins at woolies. Text Gemma, tell her to come get shitfaced wif da boiiis

>>35646379
>>35646378
>>35646376
Fuck me, do the rest of those pooftas have jobs or some gay shit? Whered they go?

>>35646360

>Try and score grog at the bottlo. One of you has a fake ID.

As long as we don't get no fourex shit.

>>35646360
>needing a fake I.D.
>at anything post ~13

>>35646393
idk man, it's half past 7am here

"Yeah you cunts can go to Maccas or whatever," you tell them. "Who's got the fake ID though?"
"I do," says Dave. "Actually it's not fake, I'm eighteen."
"You stay back a year?" Fred asks.
"Nah I'm from New South Wales. They do school different there."

You and the guys agree to meet back there after getting your stuff. Someone heads to Woolies for a chip run. You and Dave head to the bottlo to get some slosh.
Dave picks out some Jim Bean, a couple six packs and a bottle of coke. You take it all up to the counter, and the middle aged bloke gives you a look.
"ID?" he asks. Dave pulls out his driver's license. The bloke checks it out. "Passes. What about him, he drinking?" He nods at you.

>No, I won't be drinking
>Yeah I'll be drinking. Just a little bit though, just between friends.
>Yeah I'll be drinking loads. You got a problem with that, you old wanker?

>>35646427
>Straya quest
>Not an ausfag

Get the fuck out of Yobo I bet you don't even like AC/DC

>>35646449

>No, I won't be drinking

Don't jeopardise the mission

>>35646449
>No, I won't be drinking
"I fookin wish, bastard will only buy me a coke."

>>35646462
wat mission m8?

>>35646449
>>No, I won't be drinking
Why the fuck did we go to the bottlo without an ID ya dun fucked.

>>35646449

Juuuust a little aye? aint waggin everyday matey bad for future

>>35646449
>>No, I won't be drinking

>>35646449
>No, I won't be drinking
this poofta wont even let me 'ave a stubby on crimbo eve.

>>35646449
>Going for a grog run with two people
>Only one ID
Shit nigga what are you doing

>>35646449

Anyone who answers anything other than

>No, I won't be drinking

Doesn't know anything about Australia's alcohol laws.

>>35646472

Getting grog ya drongo

>>35646517
They can still refuse service if they think you might be drinking anyway

>>35646539

Yes, but it was the least bad option. It's the one that gets us a chance at the booze. The other two lock us out automatically.

right lads, it's late down here so I'm gunna fuck off. r'memba to smash any uppity shits and drink goon

"No, I won't be drinking. The coke's for me."
The cashier stops for a long moment. "Ah, what do I care." He puts it all up on the register, and Dave pays. "Don't drink it all at once," he says as you leave.
"Close one," Dave says. "And where the fuck was your ID anyway?"
"It got confiscated last time we went to get grog, remember? At the place over in Nerang."
"Oh fuck, yeah. We got luckier then than we did now. Jesus christ."
You meet up with the rest of the guys and head back to the park. Josh leads you through the brush into The Spot. You clear out some of the bottles and sit down on the pressed grass. You bags yourself the mattress. It's not too mouldy tonight, which is good.

It's about an hour later and it's starting to get a little dark. You and the guys have had a few drinks each.
Someone comes up with a bright idea. "Oi, let's get some chicks over!" Everyone agrees and pulls out their phone.
You look at your contacts list and pick out some girls.

>Gemma, no explanation needed
>Melissa. She lives in the house behind yours and has been a good friend since you moved here, but she's a bit of a prude.
>Chanel. In your care class. She's hot, redheaded and single. Not as hot as Gemma, but close enough. You don't talk to her much though.
>Mary. Plays Oboe for the band? Alright. Pretty plain and boring though. Might be up for it but not a known party animal.
>Rissa. School bicycle. Nearly everyone has had a ride. You're an exception. She's always up for it, but even you have standards. Sometimes.
>Claudia. You think she's bi. Don't know much about her other than that..

>Pick however many you like. The more you pick, the less likely they'll come though.

>>35646679
>>Melissa. She lives in the house behind yours and has been a good friend since you moved here, but she's a bit of a prude.
Let's corrupt some youth.

>>35646679
>Big Mandu the flaming faggot abo

>>35646679
>Gemma, no explanation needed

>>35646679
>Claudia. You think she's bi. Don't know much about her other than that..
How do we have her number and not know what she looks like?

>>35646679

>Gemma,Chanel and Rissa

Gemma is for us, the sluts are for the other guys, keep the friend away since we don't want anyone going after her, she might be waifu material

>>35646679
Post pictures of the galls.

>>35646679
>>Gemma, no explanation needed

>>35646743
You think I keep pics of girls on my tablet? Or even ever? That aren't nudes of strangers from the internet? Get real mate.

>>35646679
>Gemma, no explanation needed

>>35646679
Gemma, rissa and Claudia for everyone else

>>35646758
>You think I keep pics of girls on my tablet?
You're not convincing anyone op.

This kind of choice probably needs a confirmation and lock in.
Gemma definitely. Any of the others? Or just her?

>>35646679
>Gemma
She'll bitch if we don't ask her
>Mellissa
Have to try, at least
>Rissa
Distraction for erryone else

>>35646787

>Rissa

Let's the other blokes fight over who gets her while we bang Gemma innabush

>>35646806
dis

>>35646787
Rissa for gangbang, one other. Melissa, get her shitfaced.

>35646800

Don't invite both Melissa and Gemma. Melissa is a prude so she probably won't approve of us banging Gemma, could start a shitstorm.

Mary

The plainest the wildest

>>35646702


AYYYYY

>>35646679
Rissa and Claudia. But don't be a cunt about it, you're pretty happy with Gemma.

(also I used to live just outside of Nerang. This shit is hilarious)

>>35646679
>nerang

No living in glorious NSW and not being arrested for owning a motorcycle

>>35646851
>NSW
>Not living in Canberra and wishing for the excitement of even a speeding ticket

life is boring...

>>35646878
>Needing to go anywhere fast in canberra

>>35646910
Pls anon. Sometimes you just need to get to the excitement of Lonsdale st roasters before it closes

Gemma and Rissa locked in. Finaly vote, try for Melissa or leave her out of it?

>>35646969
try her

>>35646969
in

>>35646969
M8 just start writing, abos are dropping like mozzies being sprayed. I say yeah, more the merrier, we got the booze and surely someone's got weed

>>35646959
I prefer Fat Goanna

Trying for Mel too. Writing.

>>35646969
Try em all

>>35647004
Jesus this quest is so white trash it makes tangfag look like snooty upper East coast

>>35647062
Straya

File: koala.jpg (30 KB, 344x291)

30 KB JPG

>>35647062

File: and.png (25 KB, 196x201)

25 KB PNG

>>35647062
M8 it's not white trash till you've partied in fuckan reservoir

>>35647066
Strayans are white trash, tho

>>35647081
Wich you have?

File: canberra map.png (259 KB, 344x648)

259 KB PNG

>>35646989
too far see attached

>>35647088
yeah m8 don't fucking judge me I grew up half Bogan

>>35647084
>das_the_joke.jpg

Is this quest inspired by "Me Stepmum's Too Fookin' Hot, Mate!" because that would be amazing.

We should go for the harem end so nobody misses out

>>35647141

We be goin STD end mate

Gemma and Rissa are easy to convince. With Gemma, you simply had to tell her to come to The Spot. She knew where it was and she knew what went on here.
For Rissa, she hadn't come to the Spot before, but she knew of it and was happy to get an invite.

Melissa was hesitant, to say the least.
"Hey Mel. Wat u say 2 comin to hang out wit me and som others in the park??"
"Are you drinking?"
"Ye"
"You know I don't drink, Ross"
"Com on, u dnt hav 2 drink, just com hang out"
"Who's there?"
"Jus me, Dave, Josh, nd the guys. Gemma Mayne nd Rissa Gerald r comin 2"
"I don't really like your friends, Ross"
"Pls? I want 2 see u relax 4 once"
"I'll think about it"
"Is that gurl talk ill think about it or legit ill think about it?"
"Fine. I'll actually think about it."
"Thx. :)"

It's only a few minutes until the girls show up. Gemma shows up and the guys all greet her. She's a usual, so it's nothing too exciting. She sits down next to you straight away, and leans onto your arm. When Rissa shows up, the guys all give a cheer. It's her first time here and they're happy to see her. Someone managed to invite Chanel too, because she shows up, and with more grog too.

Gemma is leaning into you, your arm wedged between her tits. "You stud, I'm still feeling good from that fucking you gave me earlier," she mumbles into your ear. "I can't help getting sloppy just thinking about it. You want to help me out?"

>Go to The Spot Within The Spot, a private-ish nook where couples usually end up
>Maybe go deeper into the bush, get some more privacy
>Let her stew for a while

File: anonyou'reawizard.jpg (7 KB, 316x202)

7 KB JPG

>>35647107
>tfw you where never invited to any parties

>>35647218
Okay now hold on a sec

I'm really worry that we might be neglecting one of the girls here, I think it's unfair to Melfags that we already have Gemma all up on our nob when we should be aiming to please as many girls as possible.

OP you are making a serious mistake railroading us like this.

>>35647225
m8 you spend shit tons on cash and you are guaranteed invites as long as you don't spaghetti like a autist

>>35647218
Fingerbang, move into the bushes, hopefully don't find a nugget

>>35647225

>mfw when German girls always invited you to party
>mfw when I dont like partying

File: 1372509313840.png (8 KB, 493x402)

8 KB PNG

>>35647225

I know that feel mate.

Pic related, a visual representation of my highschool years

File: Oh shit nigger what are y(...).jpg (763 KB, 1200x1653)

763 KB JPG

>>35647272
>Mfw you could have tapped German ass
>Mfw you don't like partying

>>35647275
>>35647225
Fags. Unaustralian. Ned Kelly is dissapoi t

File: all over the place.jpg (9 KB, 213x236)

9 KB JPG

>>35647257
Well Im picture related.

>>35647286

> I prefer Asian

My dick is burnt out man, dem Asians are freaky bunch

>>35647218
>>Go to The Spot Within The Spot, a private-ish nook where couples usually end up

>>35647250

We don't want Melissa to be around when Gemma is since Mel may secretly have feelings for us. The banging that happened earlier is going to be brought up for sure and that's gonna start shit

File: Disgusting.jpg (76 KB, 600x450)

76 KB JPG

>>35647297
Nigga no excuse I have depression and fucking assburgers if I can into normalfag you can too!

>>35647315
>Not redheads
>mfw

>>35647323
Mel also doesn't like who we hang out with and probably wouldn't be okay while the attention of the only person she knows gets hogged up by gemma

>>35647335
>Fucking a soulless succubus
>enjoy your st paddy's day

File: microexpressions-disgust.jpg (28 KB, 524x336)

28 KB JPG

>>35647335
>redheads over Asians

>>35647335

> Not having your ass rimmed by 7/10 Asian

>>35647352
>>35647359
Niggas tell me you don't love this http://imgur.com/a/rxxxw

File: weird feeling.jpg (6 KB, 221x228)

6 KB JPG

>>35647335
And what makes you think that I don't´?

>>35647380
stop shitin' up ye thread with ya autism mate.
I can taste em assburgers spillin' out ya pockets already.

One vote for fingerbang, and one for spot in the spot.

Uh, is that it?

>>35647419
voting for spot in the spot

>>35647419
spot in the spot mate

>>35647419
Fingerbang here on the way to the spot

>>35647425
deep in the woods in the arse

use beer as lube

>>35647430
heh.
lets do this.

>>35647433
>woods at night
you lookin to get us ate by a dire kangaroo, mate?

>>35647433
This post is the most bogan thing I've ever seen on the internet.

>>35647456
Kangaroos don't like in the woods. Cassowaries, on the other hand...

>>35647470
fuck yes, I win cunt, go home, for I glass ya cunts

>>35647470
This is the kind of shit that happens when you start giving out free wifi on trains.

>>35647480
That's why i specified DIRE kangaroo, duh

>>35647480

You better be in some close to Perth to spot them Murderous Cunt mate

>>35647492
But don't dire animals always live in the same ecosystem as their normal counterparts? Also, the possibility of dire cassowaries should be more of a concern for you...

>>35647403
Are you angry becasue you've been holding it in for four days or something?

>>35647502
Canadian, actually. I just watched a lot of Kratt's Creatures and other nature shows when I was a kid.

>>35647507
NORMAL dire animals yes, i'm talking about dire AUSTRALIAN animals. As far as dire cassowaries goes if there's one within range it doesn't matter where we are we're just as dead

>>35647490

My sides, help

>>35647507
Dire cassowaries were hunted to extinction much like Tasmanian aboriginals. However, dire kangaroos breed with alarming speed, resulting in the regime of mad, furry velociraptors Australia suffers under to this day

>>35647507
>dire cassowaries
Where is your god now?

>>35647549
Having its liver chewed on by the dire funnelwebs

File: 1412055495866.gif (1.94 MB, 374x354)

1.94 MB GIF

>>35647433
This

>>35647569
Dire doesn't apply to vermin. I believe there's a different term for them.

File: 1411883819560.jpg (99 KB, 644x732)

99 KB JPG

>>35647569
This thread is making me seriously reconsider my plans to travel to this amazing land next week.

>>35647594
M8 you've never seen an Australian spider. They're not vermin, they're nightmares

>>35647613
>Implying you should want to come here

FUCKING WHY YA STUPID CUNT

>>35647615
Don't be a fucking pussy just stomp of the fucker a bit.

>>35647615
Are we talking rat sized? Because anything that is smaller than a rat in it's non-dire form is considered vermin.

>>35647613

Go to Indonesia mate, die drinking a rice wine mixed with avtur instead !

>>35647631
Its got eight legs and is hairier than my nutsack, I'll stick to my going and let it have the garden shed

>>35647613
Well I won't say don't come here, it is a beautiful if deadly place
Be warned though shit is retardedly expensive, even our own travel commission is saying people need to drop their prices because people are refusing to come here over the cost

>>35647615

Mate I once had 3 Wolfies in my room all larger than half a foot in diameter. Nightmares is a fucking understatement.

File: 1410391471980.gif (492 KB, 450x350)

492 KB GIF

>>35647631
Not always possible I'm afraid.

File: Average day in Australian Cbd.jpg (49 KB, 461x287)

49 KB JPG

>>35647637
Nigga this is life in the city here

>>35647613
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNEeq5qGh8I

>>35647660
Get a bigger boot.

>>35647433
Every time I tab back to this thread, it gets more and more, whatever this is.

You're going to back tangfag look cultured at this rate.

File: 1411637744263.gif (2.11 MB, 624x352)

2.11 MB GIF

>>35647654
Christ, buy a fucking shotie mate.

>>35647613
>grey nurse sharks
>picture of a great white
U wot mate?

>>35647683
You're trying too hard, broski

You put a hand on her back, out of sight of the others. She's not wearing a bra, you can't feel one through her t-shirt. You slide your hand down her back and under the hem of her shorts. They're not as tight as the jeans she wore earlier, affording you much easier access. She's going properly commando too. Girl was prepared. You slide your hand further down, copping a good feel of her arse, then further still. You can see Gemma's breathing quicken. Finally you're stroking her cunny from the back. She wasn't lying, she's fairly wet already. You push further, enough to put your middle finger inside and start moving it around. She's breathing heavily through her mouth now.
"Don't be so obvious," you mutter. She closes her mouth and gulps. You keep up the fingering, with everyone else none the wiser. You even take a drink from your beer as you do it.

You get a wicked thought. When no one is looking, you stand, pulling Gemma up with your hand still inside her. She gasps and moans, loudly, but luckily someone else had just told a joke and everyone was laughing.
"Ross, what the hell."
"Shush," you tell her. You nudge her along, trying to keep up the fingerbanging. She waddles along, but she's going, even if she's a little unsteady. You manage to sneak away from the others and into the darkness, following the path made by teens before to a little nook in the stand of trees. There's a plastic sheet here, over another mattress so you didn't have to fuck on the grass.

You push Gemma down to her hands and knees, your fingers still inside her. You yank down her shorts enough to expose her perfect arse, and enough for you to get much better access to her twat. And like earlier today, you go full force. The schlicking sound of her wet snatch can be heard over the party a little way away, and Gemma is moaning her head off, already brought close by you before. Just a few more seconds and she cums, hard, and collapses onto the matress, twitching and whimpering.

1/2

>>35647683

Bogan, mate, Bogan is love, Bogan is life

File: 1408288102539.jpg (128 KB, 630x886)

128 KB JPG

>>35647707
Oh boy here we go

>>35647692

Actually am in progress towards getting a shotgun, I just used a big fucking 2x4 and walloped 'em till they stopped squirming.

File: 1400599289885.jpg (174 KB, 500x350)

174 KB JPG

>>35647758
In this case I think a flamethrower might be more appropriate.

Are we some kind of delinquent sexgod?

Also, I demand more buttersprinkle bread.

>>35647794
Fuck off murrican

Your phone buzzes at this. You pull it out, it's Melissa.
"You REALLY think I should come down? :/"
"Who's that?" Gemma gasps out.
"Best friend," you reply.
"Who's your best friend?" Gemma asks, rolling onto her back and taking off her clothes completely.
"Melissa. She lives in the house behind mine."
"Oh. I thought you two were fuck buddies."
"What? No. I've known her like my whole life."
"Yeah, she's way too innocent anyway. She just screams virgin." Gemma lies back and starts rubbing herself. "What she want?"
"I invited her down but she's really unsure."
"Mm, yeah~. Well she does seem to be way too innocent. But I wouldn't mind seeing her cut loose, get drunk, get her tits out for the boys, get bent over a table and fucked until she can't walk. Oh!"
You're not sure if the stiffy you're popping is because of the way Gemma is describing your best friend, or the fact that she's fingering herself furiously.

>Insist that Mel comes down?
>Yes
>No

>>35647793

I was content to sign the house over to the spiders and just move towns.

>>35647794
I think we're sort of a delinquent prodigy in general.
We've already established we get above average grades in spite of wagging constantly.

File: image.jpg (72 KB, 400x615)

72 KB JPG

Bogdan! Chaika! Will fookin cut you mate!

>>35647840

Come down Mel, Gemma wants to be friend with you

>>35647840
It's fukken harme time.

>>35647840
Ye, she can come down, but only for us.

>>35647840
>Yes
Sounds like a threesome

>>35647840

Tell Mel to come down in like half an hour, that way we can bang Gemma and then give Mel the attention she needs like a good friend

>>35647840
Yeah, get the JD ready, get her shitfaced. Hey cunt, you gonna do this regular, or are you some kinda cocktease?

>>35647886
The fuck you mean cunt

>>35647884
>half an hour
We'll not need to take that long to finish with Gemma and be ready for another go again, will we?

>>35647840
Well if you're going to talk about my best friend that way maybe we'll have to put this fuck on hold

>>35647897

Nah the half hour ain't all for fucking, Gemma is probably gonna brag or do some other dumb slut shit, we gotta get that outta the way so we can get rid of before Mel comes.

>>35647899
What are you, a bitch cunt?

>>35647935
What, ya a cuntcunt, cunt?

>>35647895
Run the quest regular-like, faggot. Or do I hunt you down and call the cousins in?

>>35647935
Well I mean we're not ACTUALLY going to put the fuck on hold just give the impression we might

I'm an Australian in the US right now.

This is just like a taste of home. I love it.

Except for the Queenslanders. Fuck the lot of ya.

>>35647946

>Calling the cousins in

That sounds a lot like something an abo would do there mate

>>35647946
Might do. I was gonna run other things but this shit is so popular and fun I think I'll probably make it regular.

>>35647961
>Implying Im not from best city

Sydney a shit

>>35647961
Queensland is basically Australias Deep South when you think about it

>>35647945
I'll do ya in ya pooftahcuncuntcunt boatman.

>>35647985
Only outside of the south-east

Brissy is full of hipsters

File: cuz.png (271 KB, 597x323)

271 KB PNG

>>35647965
>>35647946

>>35647985

Australia's deep south is Tasmania.

Little island/state full off two headed wierdos

>>35648011
So are not insignificant chunks of the deep south

>>35648011

Fuck me dead, mate, that's even worse.

>>35647840

>Insist that Mel comes down?

threesome time

OP did someone at least bring cheezels?

its not a real aussie party without cheezels

>>35648055
One of them went to woolies to get chips

You text Mel back. "Com down in 20 mins. Runnin out of grog, evryone will be mellow out wen u get here :)"
The reply is quick. "Ok, see you then."
"Is that sorted?" Gemma asks.
"Yeah, all done."
"Great, now FUCk me!"
And you do.

You come back to the party about ten minutes later, and like you predicted, everyone's run out of grog and they're all starting to chill out. Helped by the fact that they're passing a blunt around.
"Fuck, why didn't you guys pull that out earlier?" Gemma asks. She's right, fucking while high could've made it better.
"Yeah I was fuckin savin it, aye, for now when we're all chillin'. Chillin' with me booyyyysssss," Josh says. He's really far gone.

>Pass us a hit, ay?
>Nah, don't feel it right now

>>35647969
Episodic bogan slacker quest when?
Mate got jumped by the next burb over's boys, rescue the fuck before them Greek bastards take something that can never be given back?

Ray-ray, the loveable dealer, has a whole stack of weed, but he needs some backup to get it off the Samoans. Do you partake in the barbecued pork or try and nick and run?

That one prissy fuck with money transferred in, give him a school tour without having him bleed out or get thrown in a bin-fire

An insane koala mauled Coco's cousins boyfriend, the 'burb is doing a koala-hunt

>>35648165
>Nah, don't feel it right now
Weed is for wimps. Booze and tobacco are the only drugs for real men. Well them and narcotics, but those tend to destroy your life.

>>35648165
Wait for Mel to show, take a hit, kiss it down her lungs, prepare fore threesome

File: 1331772817842.png (174 KB, 600x600)

174 KB PNG

>>35648165
>>Pass us a hit, ay?

>>35648165

>Nah, don't feel it right now

Mel doesn't like weed or grog, it's best if we don't have any lest we annoy her, also don't wanna fuck anything up while we're out of it.

>>35648199
M8 take some molly at a bush rave,go camping with some shrooms you forage yourself. Either of these is acceptable

>>35648225
>>35648199
You unaustralian cocksmokers

>>35648213
Seconding.

>>35648165
Not right now, wanna be sober to keep gemma from pissing mel off

>>35648165

Keep sober for mel, keep two good heads

>>35648165
>Nah, don't feel it right now

>>35647062
>>35647683
Don't be a filthy abbo, m8. What quest do you run?

"You wanna hit, bro?" Josh asks.
"Nah, not feelin it right now."
"'Kay bro, just hit me if you need a hit." He collapses, giggling. "I'm the funniest wog in the world!"
"So, uh, guys," you say. "My friend Melissa is coming down. She's not... used to all this, yeah? So go easy on her."
"Right, Ross," Josh says. "You're the boss! Hehehehehe. Ross the Boss!"

"Isn't Mel a total bitch?" asks Rissa.
"What gave you that idea?" You shoot back. "I don't think you've even met her."
"Sarah and Suzy always going on about how Mel thinks she's so much better than us, with how she gets good grades, studies, doesn't drink, doesn't smoke. She's just a stuck up bitch."
"Do you hear yourself right now?" asks Chanel. "If anyone's the stuck up bitch, it's you."
"Hey!" Rissa says. "You're just jealous because I get all the boys."
"That's cuz youse so easy, ay?" Says Josh. Everyone laughs at this.
"Whatever," Rissa says. "I don't care if you think I'm a slut. I am a slut. I love to get fucked and I'm proud of that."
"I don't think I have trouble getting the boys, anyway," Chanel says, before sitting in Dave's lap. "Isn't that right, Davo?"
"Whatever you say, babe, as long as you keep sitting there." Chanel slaps his arm.

"Anyway," Chanel continues. "I don't think Mel is a stuck up bitch. Like Ross said, she's just not used to doing all of this. I sit next to her in art and biology, and she's not so bad. She's just, I dunno, innocent, I guess. Maybe a little naive. I think she needs to get out more. Ross, besides you, how many friends does she have?"
The question tames you off guard. "Uh, Anna and Mary I guess? I don't really talk to them much."
"See? She just needs to get out more. We should show her a good time."

Your phone buzzes. "I'm at the park. Where was I supposed to go? I can't see anyone."

>Tell her where
>Go out and get her

>>35648532
>Go out and get her
Don't be a fukkin wog m8

>>35648532
>In da fookin spooot ya cunt

>>35648532
>>Tell her where

>>35648532
>Go out and get her

>>35648532
>>Go out and get her

>>35648532
>>go out and get her

It's nearly 1:30am in standard time land. Giving you warning, not sure how much longer I can last.

>>35648629
It's 4:20 over here man. At least get to a good stopping point.

>>35648506
The quest fot ur mum
Pretty easy quest really. Ended in a thread. Never seen a woman put out so easily

>>35648896
I know, aye? She's a mad cunt, but I do love me mum.

>>35648629
The fuck you on about. It's barely noon. Keep running cunt.

"That's her," you say, standing up. "You're going to need to behave," you tell Gemma, who's clutching at your leg. You shake her off and scramble back through the brush, out into the open park. It's gotten pretty dark by now, and you see Mel standing jpunder a street light next to the walking path.
"Hey, Mel," you call out. She turns, and spots you waving in the darkness.
She walks up. "Hey Ross. Where is everyone?"
"Through here," you say, grabbing her by the hand and leading her into The Spot.

From the outside, you can't see in. Someone has hung up a battery powered lantern that illuminates the bowl of trees, and you can't see that light from the outside. You introduce Mel to everyone, then introduce everyone to Mel. With that done, you plonk back down in your spot, next to Gemma, and Mel sits on the other side of you.
The party gets back into the swing of things, with girls sitting in guy's laps and everyone just chatting about stuff. Someone's found the last beer bottle, and the joint gets passed around again.

>insist Mel has a drink
>insist Mel has a hit
>insist nothing, you haven't had enough to drink tonight

>>35648918
I'm in Australia you shitty eurofag

>>35648919

>insist nothing, you haven't had enough to drink tonight

Let Mel get a bit more comfortable with everything before we start suggesting new things to her.

>>35648919
>insist Mel has a drink

>>35648919

Drink mel drink

>>35648940

If the cuckoo aint cocking it aint midninght

>>35648955

>>35648919
>insist nothing, you haven't had enough to drink tonight

>>35648962
Fine, not done yet

>janitor deletion' my clever shitposts in Straya Quest
Oi! The fook u doin' mate? Shitpostin be proud Strayin' culture! Ya ruinin' a proud heritage in a Strayin' Quest!

Actually no, christ, it's 2am. Fuck that, I gotta sleep.

I'll continue this tomorrow with a new thread with the result of whatever this vote is.

>>35648919
She's probably a lightweight, so one drink will be enough so that's she open to suggestion but you won't feel bad about it.

>>35648017
How do ya circumcise a Taswegan?
Kick his sister in the jaw!

>>35648919
>>insist nothing, you haven't had enough to drink tonight

>>35649034
Thanks for the thread cunt, I'd like to see this continue as an episodic thing every now and then, but don't put off your other quests for it.

>>35648919
>>insist Mel has a drink
just for a taste, its the last bottle so things won't get crazy

>>35648919
Insist nothing you haven't had enough
Fucking get into it first then give them some