I have no issues with the current dress code, although the usual fare within the guild is obviously quite liberal as it is. No offense, Warlock Noel.
When in public, however, a mage should be able to wear any clothes evocative of their practice. Within public decency laws, of course.

File: MSPaint Wizard.png (12 KB, 504x399)

12 KB PNG

>>36142315
I say stick to the traditional cowls robes, and pointy hats.

Not only are they iconic, they're easy to draw.

>>36142315
While I find the current dress code more than enough to represent myself, I do believe that we should consider the alternative at least. Perhaps we could have a trial period for a new dress code? I'd say a Standard Interdenominational Week.

The only problem I can see is the common peasant claiming to be an eccentric mage. Perhaps we should ban the adornment of the dress of commoners?

I expect to have a few hiccups, but otherwise I see no problem with allowing our more eccentric brethren to dress as they please, within reason. A far more pressing issue, I believe, is the petition from the necromancer guild for more conjured bodies. It's become a serious issue on my plane, with the necromantic computer now taking up a good half of it's allotted space. I fear much more and we won't be able to keep the secrets of conjuration obfuscated from it!

P-please let me go..please...I beg of you...

>>36143532
Oh be quiet Roderick! You act as if you don't enjoy the limb I got you for your birthday. Go back to playing with the other squires.

Both male and female members should have the right to dance and remain naked. This is an ancient tradition, from a time when magic was still a deep spiritual experience, not yet corrupted by hermeneutism and those silly alchemists.

>>36143565
The other squires keep breaking it...and calling me names...

OH, good, I'm not too late today.

I expected my students to take longer to shuffle through the assignments today.

Anyway, what's this about robes? Can I FINALLY start wearing that skull mask my niece made for me to bribe her way out of my class?

Me and other arcane staff at the University don't see anything wrong with the dress code, but ours students are clearly against it. Although they follow it (we throw them into dragon cages if they don't) it would probably be time to think of something more... Modern? I mean, we introduced those robes like a few thousand years ago. I know that those robes have extreme value to our tradition, but we have to follow the rest of the world sometimes.

File: Anfarthon.png (16 KB, 504x399)

16 KB PNG

>>36143532
Who's got you locked up, then? And how do I know you aren't daemonhost trying to trick me?
>>36143016
Hey, Anfarthon! How've things been? I finished that picture of you for the new portrait in the Headmages' Hall.

I say we should be a little more liberal with the school uniform, I mean I modify my outfits all the time, why not let the students have a little fun?

File: MagiciansStageCabaret.jpg (18 KB, 692x368)

18 KB JPG

I don't have an issue with the dress code. If you guys want to wear classic robes, that's cool. I've got this whole stage magician thing going on, but I'd never impose it upon the rest of you.

>>36143719
Oh, Rody. Just come here a tiff. let me fix it. There, good as new. Why don't you use that new sword I gave you? It would sure show the other squires who's who.

>>36143749
Exactly my point! While the old guard will always have our traditions, let the younglings experiment a little. I'm sure that as soon as we let them wear these newfangled pants, they'll gladly come back to the airy and free feelings of the robe.

>>36143732
I've always been a proponent of masks, personally. How is your niece doing? is she still having trouble conjuring higher functioning zombies?

>>36142315
I say that mages should continue to walk around in unprotective robes that can easily be cut by blades and allow for a full range of weaponry to be used on them. Really, armor is for those fighter fellas, who are far more tough and to whom we owe our thanks for taking the frontlines in many an engagement. Why don't we show our appreciation by wandering down to the Fighter's Guild and conjuring them all some ale and wenches?

>>36142315
The dress of a mage should tell you a story about who he is, who he was and who' he's trying to be. As such limiting should be kept to the bare minimum of public decency and nothing more. That being sad I still love the robes look myself.

>>36142315

The head of the Sartorialmancers is extending regards and imploring us to stick with tradition, owing primarily to the alright tight budget for arcane clothing. He does have a point, and his history does show some keen financial management with regard to keeping us supplied, even if I can't remember his name. You know who he is; he's the one that owns all of those robe-tailoring shops.

>>36143867
Oh, please, meatshield. Don't waste your breath, Zombies do the same job but for much cheaper.

>>36143864
Sadly, yes. The lower functioning ones she can conjure just fine, but none of us can quite figure out where her block is.

I've been contemplating sacrificing a few Paladin Initiates for her, seeing if that helps.

>>36143867
Please, defensive spells are superior anyway, my Iron Flesh spell can cause iron swords to snap like twigs.

>>36143867
A good mage doesn't need armor, he won't get hit. Failing that his guards and wards should take care of it.

File: 235a2169d211604bf26255754(...).jpg (843 KB, 654x1000)

843 KB JPG

>>36143532
Hey, kid, if you need a job, I'm sure I can add another lovely assistant to my stage.

>>36143867
Sounds like a gig. Alright, guys, I'll be back in a bit.

>>36144044
No Dave, stop making boys dress up in girls clothes.

>>36143985
How long did it take you to get your iron skin to that level Noel?
>>36144044
Pretty sure they were insulting us and our intelligence with that guy Dave. You aren't going to get paid for it.
>>36143953
Try Zircoon's fifth recitation, Have her run through it a few times. Should help you find where she is having issues.

>>36144044
I'm sure that the fine warriors down there will appreciate it. That will certainly earn their favor which may or may not be useful at a later date when things may or may not start going horribly, horribly wrong for magic users.

>>36144163
Um....four years?

>>36142315
There was a dress code?
Frankly so long as we can show our magical abilitys its all fine yes?
I seem to remember the old penalty of impersonating a man (or woman) of magic was to have your head combusted by someone who was, did they change that?

File: Noel.png (12 KB, 504x399)

12 KB PNG

>>36144069
Noel, good to see you again! Where did you want this portrait you commissioned?
>>36144163
Ah, and Soros is here as well, wonderful. Do you have the felwar stones we discussed for my payment? Pictures don't mance themselves, after all.

>>36143867
I really appreciate it when the fighters wear plate or chainmail. I sincerely do and always send a thank you message to their family. Hehe.

>>36143953
Have you ever considered therapeutic electricity? I'd be happy to give a demonstration. I've found that it can greatly help assist in aspiring mages' mana control and casting.

On the dress code, alternatives to the traditional robes should be considered. Skylord knows how many flaming uniforms I've had to snuff out. Maybe something less flowing, but doesn't obstruct casting like robes? Plenty of first years have trouble with that.

>>36144163
Oh, huh. Thanks.

Hopefully, we can get her through this with a minimum of trouble. And without getting a bunch of sword-happy paladins jumping down our throats.

Hello, everyone! So what's today's topic?

>>36144044
Oh, can I be in one of your shows? I hear that they're particularly saucy. I just hope the dress code changes soon so i can wear something fitting.

>>36144221
Just put it in my room, I'll set it up myself.
Don't touch anything, I've rigged a few traps in case of thieves, or Randolph.

>>36144272
Wizard attire: robes, or not? I say keep the dress code as it is.

>>36144163
I'm doing okay on cash these days, so this is just a charity performance for those poor, unfortunate magicless fighters.

>>36144171
I hope so. This is my first time performing for the Fighter's Guild, though. Any ideas on tricks I should use before I go?

>>36144239
Oh yeah! Chainmail! We wear that! All the time! And plate too! In fact, we are most certainly going to be wearing that during the next few weeks and we're not even considering wearing armor that would be any different in any way!

File: Cultist of the Changing Tides.jpg (52 KB, 300x300)

52 KB JPG

>>36144294
Hm, yeah. I wear a robe with a pointy hood and mask.

File: 1413219190530.jpg (32 KB, 334x700)

32 KB JPG

>>36143867
>>36144044
I motion we conjure the Fighters Guild into Wenches!

>>36144239
Wait wait wait.
Im sure that we used the cheapo flamable robes as a kind of screening test. If you don't figure out how not to light yourself on fire when casting, this is probably not your profession.
Or in the alchemists case, throwing stuff. But the sample principle applies.

I would like to point out that some of our schools of magic necessitate disguises to be practiced effectively. Why don't we just re-implement the old ID system?

Keep in mind that our robes are our uniforms, both indicating our powers as well as intimidating the ungifted. Should the peasants require our services, those of us with pointy hats will be approached first.
Thus the Galaxies say.

>>36144329
They already have enough women in the Guild, even if they act about as ladylike as a bunch a bunch of boulders.

>>36144314
Just conjuring ale and wenches will probably work. They might want to see you zap some targets or something, just to see the light show- they're like that sometimes. If they do, just use your most common offensive spells to hit some of the straw dummies- no need to go any bigger than that, don't want the guild getting destroyed.

>>36144352
That fell apart when the theives guild broke the code and used it to steal the gender change staff.
It took 20 years and three mass female transformation rituals before we got that back. Never again.

>>36144193
Hmm, yeah its outside you typical field so I can see that. You should try the 3rd degree fire shield, it's more your....style.

>>36144221
Sure. *tosses him a bundle* Be careful, they are a might bit touchy.

>>36144242
Here's hoping girl isn't near the level to deal with it yet.

>>36144314
Fair enough, don't spoil them too much though.
Need them to collect items for us after all.

>>36144294
Let them wear what they want as long as they can afford it. Darwinian theory at work.

>>36144352
Too easy to fool, and too expensive to upgrade to wear we need it to be otherwise.
Also see>>36144387

File: 1414627674104.jpg (265 KB, 963x830)

265 KB JPG

>>36144375
But then who will I work my Oppaimancy on?

>>36144387
Then can we at least only enforce the dress code when we're actually teaching? It just seems like a waste of time in any other situation

>>36144329
You just want wenches who can't resist mental domination for shit, don't you?

>>36144385
Sounds easy enough. I'd at least like to dazzle them a bit. Make them envy our extreme awesomeness.

>>36144329
Definitely not the entire Guild. That would be bad for my PR. Maybe just a single volunteer from the audience.

>>36144405
Keep losing my godsdamned nametag.

>>36144409
Yourself? Also someone get a conjurer in here to banish this daemon.

>>36144423
It's a daemon hat do you think?

>>36144329
To be honest I'm not sure half of them would notice. Most of the time they're too drunk to see straight. The other half that noticed might actually be happy about it. To you mages, getting a forced gender change is bad, because it means bothering with having to change back. To completely mundane warriors who are certainly not trying to master magic, it's a new experience that changes their life forever.

Here's your coffee everyone

>>36144405
Would you believe Iron Flesh is actually a weird offshoot of Pyromancy?
Cuz it is.
I'm just as surprised as you are.
And I already know Fire Shield, I can cause 4th Degree burns with that badboy, remember?

>>36144413
Teaching, being a student and official occasions is the only time the dress code is legally required.

Really they want to know if they can wear different things. Frankly so long as we keep our hats i do not give a hoot.

File: 1408902718924.jpg (196 KB, 1013x1403)

196 KB JPG

>>36144387
>three mass female transformation rituals
We should really do more of those...

>>36144423
>You just want wenches who can't resist mental domination for shit, don't you?
Oh please, if I wanted squishy puppets, I would have moved for mass Flesh Golem creation!

...Thought that's not a bad idea in and of itself...

File: 551722.jpg (1.46 MB, 3508x1973)

1.46 MB JPG

I think we shpuld use more eldritch clothing

>>36144462
Mortimer, you are a the light of hope in a sea of darkness. Thank you.

>>36144440
Yes... Envy. Certainly not study. Why would warriors study magic? That would be silly.

...By the way, does anyone have any spare spellbooks laying around? Because... you know... I'm a wizard. And I study spellbooks. All the time.

>>36142315
My good friends, the dress code can be somewhat bypassed simply with the use of glamours, or illusions for the weaker amongst us. Afterall, you're still wearing a robe, even if it does appear to be a skirt.

>>36144503
It's always nice to be appreciated

>>36144409
Anywhere that doesn't include me, that council, and the Fighter's Guild with a legendary rivalry we share.
Especially me, I like my slightly above average size, not to big not to large, perfect.

>>36144480
Excuse me, I happen to like my hood.

>>36144498
Fuck no. You have any idea what happens when you get a dozen necromancers in training all casting spells around eldritch clothing?

What doesn't happen is ANYTHING ENJOYABLE TO CLEAN UP

File: plsgo.png (20 KB, 504x399)

20 KB PNG

>>36144488
>>36144409
>>36144329

>>36144463
Then may I ask why it took you so long to master it? Also the degree in this case meant amplitude, it'll melt anything under a high level enchanted blade before it gets near you.

>>36144462
Much obliged good sir.

>>36144505
Not fooling anyone. You know that right?

>>36144488
Same thing I said to the "Stabomancer"

>>36144488
No, we really shouldn't
The mass unbalance in genders caused a population crash in those kingdoms, since law stated that marriage was one man and one woman and all that, the legal fall out and resulting wars were atrocious.

Its all very well and good having a fetish for the damn thing, weird as it is, but mass scale on a unwilling populance is equal to a declaration of war. That was the origonal verdict for it. Also the reason why the damn staff is kept in a secret location now.

>>36144462
Mm, Thanks Mortimer.

>>36144480
Look, I just don't want it to be enforceable during guild meetings. It has a tin foil hat stipulation for conspiromancers. We're trying to fight the stereotype damnit! Do you want the lizard people to win?!?!

>>36144462
You are a wonderful person, and I appreciate you.

>>36144536
My pardon Doomblight, generalizations for the overall idea.

Do you still want those desecration potions by the way?

File: 1413133425417.jpg (52 KB, 688x1000)

52 KB JPG

>>36144440
Why do you have to kill my fun Dave?

>>36144454
>Also someone get a conjurer in here to banish this daemon.
Considering the Head Conjurer summoned me, good luck!
Also, these Pajamas are comfy.

>>36144459
>To completely mundane warriors who are certainly not trying to master magic, it's a new experience that changes their life forever.
EXACTLY!
Plus think of how this will allow us to study the practical effects of Oppaimantic buffs on humanoid combatants!

>>36144548
I had trouble with Iron Flesh, ok? Some mages have trouble with certain spells, I'm pretty much the concept of boom mage made flesh, defensive buffing spells were a total bitch for me to get the hang of.

>>36144571
Conspierre, have you been taking your dried frog pills like i asked you to?

Whee hawv hey dress cohd? Whee deed knawt knhow tat. Whee weel hawv too gho weethout food fhor eh feew dayz too ahfoord rohbes.

>>36144548
What do you mean fooling? I'm not fooling anyone because I'm not trying to. I'm a wizard. I said so. Look, I even have "mancy" in my title! And I am definitely not here on a mission from the Fighter's Guild. Really, I've been nothing but honest with you people the whole time I've been here and this is what I get? An honest wizard can't be trusted at his word anymore?

>>36144581
OH, yeah, thanks a bunch.

You would not believe how hard it is to get these through normal channels.

>>36144536
Why of course magic isnt without its risk and with a chance to invite madness and yet clarity who wouldnt taje the eldritch style

>>36144586
Do I need to sic Marco on you?

>>36144609
OOH! Another cultist! What cult are you from?

>>36144505
Yeah, I can lend you most of my library on Prestidigitation if you'd like.

>>36144586
I didn't say it would make them happy, and I certainly didn't say that the ones who WEREN'T happy with it wouldn't cut you in half fifty thousand times with an axe half the size of a house. Maybe even the ones who WERE happy with it might do that.

>>36144591
Ugh, I know the feeling. I was an illusionist before I branched out, I swear Rallying Cry has to be some kind of offshoot bardic magic.

>>36144657
It's true. You'd be surprised how many people study how to utilize stabbing implements because they have stabbing fetishes.

>>36144591
Fair enough, you may want to start stacking some of your defensive spells. Fair warning.

>>36144615
I'm the head Diviner remember? You can't fool me, especially when your fighter's guild id badge is hanging out.

>>36144638
Please do, I don't want to ruin this meeting by blowing it up.

>>36144648
Don't he'll abuse it.

File: 1412374855788.jpg (167 KB, 483x743)

167 KB JPG

>>36144556
BUT HOW WILL I EVER PROOF MY THESIS ON MASS USE OF FERTILITY MAGICKS?!?!

>>36144609
Don't worry deary, you can borrow some of mine...

>>36144615
.... Roark, you still need that special cream for your er... 'problem' down below? i just made a new batch today and since your here and not over the fighters, might as well.

>>36144619
Yeah i know, but at least you know these are guaranteed by guild standards. Black market desecrate potions are usually loot spoils and have god influence taint in them. Death gods seem to be every were these days.

>>36144648
Anything... stronger? Being the wizard that I am, I have already certainly mastered such an easy spell, and wish for greater arcane challenges.

... I'll still take it though.

>>36144505
I suppose I could lend you a few on the subject of polymorphing. Just make sure not to use any of the spells written in pink ink. Or do, just don't use them anywhere near the guild, still remember my last punishment.

>>36144601
Yes. They have given me such clarity in deducing the plots of the frog, lizard, and people peoples. Never before had I entertained the notion that delusion was itself a delusion, and that all events are part of the one true conspiracy. I thank you for this insight, despite the cost of intense itching, twitching, and probably hallucinations.

>>36144696
All righty thing, I'm going to give you one warning. You can leave now and I won't six Marco on you.but if you don't, rember that I gave you a chance

>>36144696
Go down to the local fish farm.
Problem solved.

>>36144462
Always a pleasure to see you again, Mortimer. Thanks.

>>36144591
I'll toast to that. Learning telekinesis was awful for me especially considering that it's damn near a required to control some of the real crazy things with lightning.

>>36144615
Considering that a chant could be hidden inside a long winded monologue? And didn't you have a suit of plate sent out with a cleaning order?

>>36144693
I got the hang of the Fire Shield spell quicker because of how ridiculously in-tuned it was with the fire element, obviously, any other defensive spell that ISN'T tied directly with fire on the same level is an outright chore to get the hang of.

File: 1397413046270.jpg (147 KB, 406x600)

147 KB JPG

>>36144742
I already did...

I hear tell of a new fashion sweeping the land!

Unter wear!

It keeps ones nethers warm through the chilliest of nights, is difficult to remove by anyone but oneself, and allows one to comfortably drain the lizard without removing it!

Truly a marvel!

>>36144762
Hm, might I be allowed to see your notes on that particular experiment?

I for one am a supporter of the robe. It is light, airy, and allows us the proper freedom of motion that is necessary for conjuration, abjuration, and all the other methods of magic. Additionally, it's just plain comfy. However, if I were, wand-to-my-head, forced to choose, I'd propose that we could be more opulent in our style. Vests, formal shirts, and overcoats would be an adequate option, and would allow us to display more of our status as master mages. Cowls and pointed hats are still a must, however, and I will accept nothing less on that point.

File: 532709.jpg (1.29 MB, 2560x1440)

1.29 MB JPG

All you heretics who practice these deviant magics shall fall for the ORDER

>>36144713
I SEE THROUGH YOUR DECEPTION LIZARD PERSON. THE PILLS SHOW ME ALL. I know that you're here to clear out the larder and throw all the bacon through the rugs to feed the people under the floor to make me stop taking these frog pills! Well, let me tell you something. I DO NOT HAVE A PROBLEM. YOU'RE CRAZY, NOT THE PILLS!

Rolled 38 (1d100)

Alright, guys, I'll be performing at the Fighters' Guild for the next 26 posts (Wizard Standard Time). The number I'm writing down is a prediction of how the fighters react. Hopefully I'll be back in one piece.

Sorry I'm late boys, had to deal with some things. What did I miss?

>>36144762
Oh god, who let their Daemon run about?

File: image.jpg (59 KB, 250x347)

59 KB JPG

>>36144824
Marco, get him

>>36144824
Temok, who makes your gear and weapons?
Right. Now go wait outside until we are done and then you can collect your order.

>>36144853
Oh silly me. I thought that was a researcher. Damned if i know these days with all the morphing that goes on.

>>36144824
Oh, uh... hi.

No mages here, just... the Club of Funny Robes?

>>36144831
I don't predict this going well at all

.>>36144853
Hells if I know. Honestly, that inquisitor over there should take her out soon enough, however.

>>36144757
Obviously, Used to take me forever to learn anything outside of Divination. Just work on layering your defensive spells in the future, it'll be necessary.

>>36144753
How goes it Ivan?

>>36144762
Well no wonder the price of fish skyrocketed this season.

>>36144788
Not going to help much, it's corruption based magic.

>>36144824
That's cute. Bring an army then we'll worry you hypocrite.

>>36144829
*bonks Conspiere on the head* GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF MAN!

>>36144853
Don't know hope someone has a banishment ready.

>>36144868
Or that.

File: 1407588027986.png (16 KB, 500x500)

16 KB PNG

>>36144788
Certainly dear!
Let me have the Lamiabarian bring them up.

>>36144824
And, which god do you worship?

>>36144824
Seems we left the door open. But seriously, One inquisitor? Have a seat and a cup of coffee, Temok. No reason your last moments can't be pleasent.

>>36144831
Don't forget your auto-teleport, Dave. You might be needing it.

>>36144853
Neurok gave me frog pills to boost my conspiromancy powers. He is a great alchemist, these pills have opened my eyes to the threat of the lizard people. I now know that they are using the hospital camps to brainwash patients into serving their own lizardy ends.

>>36144693
What ID badge? Oh, that... That's... that's my visitor pass! I was just visiting the Fighter's Guild! And it wasn't to help them learn magic! Because I am definitely a wizard!
>>36144711
I would need it... If I wasn't a wizard. Also, I found another supplier on the, um, Elemental Plane of Medical Supplies. Because that's a plane. That I found. Because I'm a wizard.
>>36144721
Yes! That would be a challenge fit for my arcane prowess.
>>36144753
A chant? Inside a monologue? No! I certainly hid no such thing. And even if I had, it certainly wouldn't have been a signal to begin the next phase of the plan... which definitely does not involve antimagic undergarments. Nope. Not at all.
And yes, I did need my PURELY DECORATIVE plate armor cleaned because it gathered too much blood. And dust. From... sitting in my blood closet! I'll take that now. Thanks.
>>36144829
Is he always like this?

>>36144884
YOU STOP THAT! Dare you doubt the pills?

>>36144824
Aw, that's cute, the little Inquisitor thinks he's a big dog among wolves.

>>36144886
What the, what happened to the trained monkey we got to be the librarian?

>>36144904
Wait, you mean the lizard people are at it again? they've been silent for over a thousand years, what brought about this sudden change?

>>36144904

Frog pills? Oh bugger, no wonder you're seeing lizards. You should probably have a swig of this potion here, it will help you see things clearly again. I call it "whisky".

>>36144824

Listen here, "muh heretics", don't you have peasants to torture and ignorant fear to spread somewhere else?

>>36144893
Oh, do you practice thunder spells? I myself am a master of thunder spells and other storm like spells.

File: Morty.png (24 KB, 504x399)

24 KB PNG

>>36144868
Mortimer, always a pleasure. For your esteemed service to the Guild for many years, the Archmage has paid me to pictomance you. I hope you don't mind that I included Marco as well.

>>36144884
Fraid the bonking wont work.
The pills are the only thing that keeps him making at least structured sentences these days. Last week we had to retrieve him from the pens, god knows how he managed to bar it from the other side when the braces are on the outside.

>>36144922
Excellent. Here you go. Usual stuff, i might have the last batch ready next month if you finish your regime properly.

>>36144824
Danial? Danial is that you underneath that 40 pounds of enchanted armor?

>>36144831
I'll accompany you to make sure it goes well. If I return before he does, something has occurred.
If I don't return, it's because I used my immense magical ability to go to another plane similar to this one except no one can find it. Ever.
Because I'm a Wizard.

>>36144944
I hadn't considered it until I started taking this prescription, but I'm certain of it. They're plotting our downfall, they seek our succulent flesh, they seek to steal our magic, they are the ones behind the missing socks in the laundry room, the bathroom graffitti, all of it! Conspiracy! How could I have been so blind?!?

>>36144944
Oh gods...
You do not call him the M word. Ever. He is a fine ape of a man.

>>36144983
Shivers, follow him.

Eat him if he gets more stabby than a mage is supposed to.

Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>36144886
Ah wonderful, I'll get right to work studying these.

>>36144884
Oh I'll be fine dear, I have a few wards in place that I got from out abjurers. An alarm should also sound if the wards somehow fail.

>>36144922
I'll just clean it off a bit, but here you have it.

>>36144966
I don't mind at all. This is a real nice picture, and I thank your for that

You may think me foolish yet ive felled far more numerous guilds than this foul wizards

>>36144922
*OBSCURA INVALIDIUS* Try learning anything now spy.

>>36144932
*Slaps Conspirre on the back of the head* Yes I do now pull yourself together!

>>36144968
Alright then. What do you advise?

File: 1414202516731.jpg (418 KB, 705x1000)

418 KB JPG

>>36144944
>What the, what happened to the trained monkey we got to be the librarian?
Went full Super Saiyan I'm afraid...

>>36144831
I'm back. Didn't quite go as well as I had hoped. Only half of the guild was around, and most were passed out drunk. Refilled their barrels of ale for them, and they thanked me. Not really a performance so much as a little quest, I guess.

Maybe next time.

>>36145010
Oi! Stop referencing other universes!

>>36144961
I was told not to drink with these, but I'm afraid I've been way ahead of you for a good two hours.
>>36144968
I...I do not wish to doubt the pills. But you're suuuuuuure I'm not allergic? this is a most itchsome rash and fever

>>36145028
I do that all the time.

>>36145008
You do realize that one of the men you are shouting at has a very respectable teaching job instructing youths in the magical art of necromancy, correct?

Who the hell even has a vendetta against a MAGE'S GUILD, of all things?

>>36145009
Get him drunk, stick him in a metal bathtub, cover him in rose petals and put a small black cat at his feet just before he wakes up.

The resulting conspiracy for how he got there should keep him occupied for the next 7 months or so it'll take for the treatment to run its course. Or until we convince that bitch of a high preistess to use a wish spell on his mind.

>>36145010
Ok, that's it. Once Marco finishes up with the inquisitor, your next

File: WeAreNotTakingTheWizard.jpg (150 KB, 1224x814)

150 KB JPG

>>36145009
BLUUUURRRUUUUUGH

>>36144884
Fair enough I suppose. Just got back from a journey east. They had a festival to a storm god, I figured heck, let's commune with it. Unfortunately, I'm forbidden from any further festivals in that country. Shame really, nice place before they got hit with that tsunami.

>>36144922
Your "visitor pass" has the title of Company of Leader on it. That armor had quite a few dinks on it for decorative plate too.

>>36144964
Ah really? Perhaps we could get together after the meeting. How is Olycodon by the way? He doing well?

>>36145008
You going to keep blustering or drink this? It's going to get cold.

>>36145022
Glad to see you're okay Dave.

>>36145008
Yet we aren't the full school just people of import whoa re here at the moment, You do not stand a chance if any of us got serious. Besides we supply you ORDER with the goods it needs to do its work.

>>36145010
Wrong planar substrate daemon.

>>36145033
*hands him a potion or purity* Just drink this Pierre.

>>36145048
I'll try that next.

File: 1405191408606.jpg (566 KB, 1067x1470)

566 KB JPG

>>36144993
But he was a monkey. He had a tail and everything. He was very smart actually.

>>36145008
Oh really now? Well, I'll bet you've never met anything like my precious little Mopsy here.

>>36145008
It is you Danial. my it has been awhile, no longer that little beansprout of a boy I can see that.

File: 1414608645056.jpg (1.29 MB, 1224x1200)

1.29 MB JPG

>>36145028
Well I didn't have any monkey pictures!

>>36144992
Conspierre, don't take the Frog Pills...

>>36145033
Ah, a rash you say? is it on the throat and lower abdomen?
If so, you need to switch to the blue variety, some people react oddly to the normal greens.

>>36145039
Oh, well I guess she can do it then.
>>36145066
Olycodon? Who is that? I may know him by another name.

>>36144888
Prahbahblee teh empahra.

>>36145071
Oh, i must be thinking of the fellow we had that accident with over in the Greenwich institute when we held the meetings there. Well i say we, i was still in training back then.

>>36145062
Eugh

>>36145066
Which deity did you piss off this time?

>>36145087
Just let him come down from them first.

File: 1409679597460.jpg (294 KB, 1440x2560)

294 KB JPG

>>36145094
I could get behind that...

>>36145066
Thanks, Ivan. Seems a ton of different conversations sprang up while I was away.

>>36145094
Emperors are mortal rulers not gods. What chaos magics are you proficient with?

File: Butt Knight.png (15 KB, 504x399)

15 KB PNG

>>36145008
I have pictomancied you as well, *brave sir knight*

>>36145104
You have a vision of a mixing reaction?
Well, this is going to end badly.

>>36145121
Hence why I gave him a potion of purity.

>>36145062
Brings back memories that does! Oh happy College days! Still remember the time I drank my own roommate.

>>36145120
Truly your power and skill know no limits, Emess.

>>36145069
Izzaaaaaafnot feeel good. I'm gonna drink it, but you can't tell the pilllls. I...Oh that feels so much better. I.....oh god I've eaten 20 pounds of raw bacon in the past 2 hours. What...what am I wearing?

>>36145087
rash, swelling, rainbow colored vomit, itching, fever, bloating, and I appear to be casting color spray when I use the lavatory. On a personal note, I hope you wander into randolph's office next time you drink. I function perfectly fine without testing your latest concoction.

>>36145136
Ugh, please tell me it wasn't you who started that damn fad.

Do you have any idea how hard it is to get students raised when they're being digested?

>>36145073
Oh, you know him Noel? I guess he can stay. As long as he doesn't touch anything.

>>36145091
Hm...Big? Has black and red scales? Speaks in mind-rending tones that could destroy planets? I'm not really being that specific. Hm. In my defense, I was drunk at the time. Gave me a neat chunk of brimstone infused with pure despair though. Maybe you could check that out, see if it helps identify him?

>>36145104
Hey. Hey. I didn't piss him off. Quite the opposite. We just got in a contest. The tsunami was him trying to beat me. Locals politely informed me that I was banned from returning after the contest is all.

>>36145120
Your skills surpasses all boundaries, Emess. Did you enter for mage of the year? I'd vote for you.

>>36145166

I believe you're wearing 20 pounds of bacon...

>>36145209
Noel knows a lot of people I wouldn't want here. No offense, Noel.
And I haven't considered it, but if it's a possibility I could run. I don't see the harm in it.

>>36145166
*ahem*
I have no idea what you are on about good sir.
But on a serious note, the pills usually only result in a rash, either you are very unlucky or you have been mixing your medicines again. Damn good think you didn't have the blue frog pills in at the same time or we would be trying to stop you casting fly constantly and talking about sock monsters.

I admit im not here to fight...Im really here to see my old death magic teacher is he here?

>>36145209
Wait, is he a devil? If so I don't know him.

>>36145166
You're welcome, that's another favor you owe me. Also you're wearing a "Anti-lizard combat suit" I think you called it.

>>36145071
Might want to use something a bit.... larger than Mopsy, Lupa, or be on hand to heal.

>>36145209
Lesser Deity or weak pantheon then? Poor schmuck took your bait.

>>36145120
Nice likeness my good pictomancer.

>>36145237
Doubt it.

I'm pretty sure I'm the only Regular who comes close to qualifying, and I sure as hell don't remember ever training any inquisitors. Especially not ones with such terrible grammar.

>>36145235
I'm not taking any more of your pills, I passed my psych eval before you started spreading gossip that I'd lost my mind!

>>36145183
Look it was a long evening, and we ran out of ale.
There was a bet, there was a spell, and then there was ale.

We DID get him back eventually (to my credit), I dont know what all the fuss is about

>>36144586
jesus fuck you come out of the damn woodwork dont you? Its like any concept that can be connected to any form of adultery summons you from the warp pit you crawled out of.

>>36145237
...Tuypo, is that you? Are you trying to be a Paladin?
>>36143794
Thank you kindly, Pictomancer. It still seems odd: Anfarthon, Head Lawmagus.
I suppose it's a living. Or, it will be when I actually get some apprentices...

>>36145268
Oh, Mopsy is a lot tougher than he looks. He's also quite adept at dodging. Plus he's poisonous, so he's got that going for him.

>>36145069
I know but if you really did dabble in the foulest magicks then half of you wouldve attacked me. Im here to ensure the purity of the lessons and magics from healing to death magic if its tainted *draws sword* the TEACHER will be purified

>>36145209
Yeah, Danial Temok is some I knew when I was still Ashburn's apprentice, he hoodwinked the poor dope into an adventure looking for an incredible holy artifact.
Needless to say, we found it, it turned out that it was imprisoning an ancient evil, which we promptly beat down, and left poor Danial holding the shattered religious artifact when the the Church came to the scene.

Guys, we have a problem. Some one has stolen all of my coffee supply's. This can not stand. Soros, any clue about who did it?

>>36145237
Was it Professor Logos, Death Sage? Old codger killed himself with his own death magic a few months ago.

They say it was the deadliest spell ever made, though. So, I guess he finally finished his masterpiece.

>>36145290
Not lost. just... misplaced?

>>36145306
Speaking of poison, may i have that next batch? His poison is wonderful for the creation of a few items of value.

>>36145229
I don't blame you, Ashburn's misadventures had me meet a lot of people.
Almost all of them want me or Ashburn or both me and him dead for various reasons.

>>36145278
I think he means the recently resurrected former head of Necromancy.

>>36145310
You do realize the second you try you'll be teleported out of plane right?

>>36145306
Lupa, I've seen you work, you know mine. Trust me on this, that armor isn't as bad as it looks.

>>36145328
One second *eyes glow* Druids...... again.

>>36145338
Do you know of the location or the spell ? If the magic remains i can harness it and bring death to the vilest scourges

>>36145328
Whoever has committed this theft will have the 'honor' of being the first apprehension by the Lawmagi of this guild.

>>36145356
No, sorry. And even if I did, I won't play party to this sordid business.

Good day, sir.

>>36145355
Those fucking Druids. As of this moment, I'm going to war against them. Anyone else want in?

>>36145109
Ah, Daemonette, I finishing skimming through your research notes on the application of a mass fertility & transmutation on an amphibian population, and I'm afraid that while causing humans to spawn eggs that can be fertilised after they've been laid is interesting, it's not within my particular field of interest.

Your application of hearts above i's and j's will be incorporated however.

>>36145347
Sure, I'll be sure to get it to you next time that I milk him for it. He's always a good boy when it comes time to milking and doesn't struggle at all.

>>36145355
Good point. I'll keep my repair spells and potions on hand then.

>>36145229
Even if you didn't win, I think the exposure could help your department. Might not get any people specializing, but I'm sure people would try it.

>>36145247
Pretty sure. I might have gone to the wrong plane for devils. My planar travel is a little average to be honest. I'll send the chunk your way for an examining?

>>36145268
Weak pantheon. Island wasn't really that big. I only left because the tsunami hit them pretty hard and my magic doesn't really help with recreation. Also, I got a piece of crystallized godspark as part of the bet. Mind taking a look at it?

>>36145328
>>36145355
Ha! They'll regret it, I can make sure of it.

>>36145268
....I need a shower, and I need to do something unspeakable to get rid of the 30 or so pounds I've put on.

>>36145120
You are a formidable wizard.

>>36145347
There will be blood between us for this.

>>36145306
Does his poison cause any kind of delusion or hallucination? If it does, I'm going to need a sample for some decidedly severe revenge.

I say long robes for the ones of us who are old, fat and ugly and revealing clothes to those of us who look like those sexy, sexy fighters.

>>36145419
It's simply a prank war. I deign to keep out of those unless law is really required.

>>36145399
Excellent. Hit me up when you next need some embryonic fluid substitute, i have spare.

>>36145425
Oh please. I have done worse to you. Remember when we were students?

>>36145389
Im in, to hell with those dancing drop-outs, lets raid them, and steal their herbs, and their potions, and their women.

>>36145425
Not really, his poison is mostly necrotic in nature and breaks down a person's body painfully.

>>36145447
I'll be sure to keep that in mind next time I need some.

>>36145389
*hands you a map and timetable* For the coffee.

>>36145399
Very good then. Hate to see the poor thing get maimed. Also I'll need another treatment for the affliction Jake'ness cursed me with by year's end. Can I count on your help?

>>36145419
Sure, I can take a look at it. Might take a while though. Things like that are pretty complicated and always unique to the deity it comes from.

File: 533753.jpg (2.31 MB, 2560x1600)

2.31 MB JPG

>>36145384
THERE YOU ARE HERETIC DAVE PREPARE FOR YOUR RECKONING. THE LAST SHIPMENT OF CTHULHUS BREATH WAS TAINTED WITH DEMONS TEARS. 5 STUDENTS DIED AND THEY SHALL BE AVENGED. NOW DIE

>>36145419
Well, I don't think the cult has ever interacted with him but I'll see. Just so you know I'm not an expert on devils and demons, I just eat any devils we kill.

>>36145389
War? Disgusting habit. I'll play no part in it.

If, however, you were simply willing to steal your coffee back with a little interest taken from the forest-dwelling fools, I would be willing to help distract them with my magic while you commit to a heist.

>>36145449
I was thinking more along the lines of giving the low ranking ones to Lupa for her expire nets, the mid ranking ones to the law magus so that he might bore them to death, the high ranking ones become living food for Marco, and the Tarrasque/dragon cross breed, but your idea is good.

>>36145482
Sure thing, though I did tell you to be more careful around him, he was always a loose cannon after all.

>>36145484
Very big sword you've got in there, are you trying to compensate for something?

>>36145389
War? Uh, sure. Haven't really done a war in a while.

You lot are really giving me a headache.

Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>36145484
I told you Temok, no refunds just because you didn't like my show!

>Rolling to teleport far away!

>>36145447
I just want you to think of me every time something goes horribly wrong in the next few weeks.

>>36145484
Just gonna say, offhand, I was nowhere NEAR that shipment, at any time, nah ah

>>36145511
Im simply after ingredients, what you do with the imbeciles afterwards is not my concern. Druids do collect the finest mushrooms

>>36145516
For how many bodies lie on the ground when im done with dave and his minions

>>36145525
Dr. Stabby, would you like to assit me in my war against the Druids for stealing my coffee supplies?

>>36145527
Shit, I only moved a few inches to the left...

>>36145527
Hah! The old "teleport a short distance to trick him" trick!

>>36145545
Need some help?

>>36145541
Minions? You mean my lovely assistants!? They have no part in this odd fixation you have on getting your ticket money back.

En Garde!

>>36145541
Gods, this place haven't changed at all... Someone roll me a Love Spell so I can bind this man to the ground.

>>36145525
Its just the general meeting Doc.

>>36145538
heheheh, Sorry? Come on, its not that bad. Well, the paying a maid to sneak it into your food was bad. At least i didnt follow through with grafting a third arm onto you. Did that one to myself.

>>36145543
I can get you the kings armies in support, just need to trick the archdruid into meeting with the king, the king sees a man that looks uncannily like the firstborn son he thought was a bastard, and bam, druids get wiped off the map.

Damn Druids, makes me almost not sorry for burning down one of their sacred forests in a accidental firestorm.

>>36145512
It was during the fight remember? While he had you pinned, he rushed me and got me point blank, was all I had not to have a critical existence failure right then and there.

>>36145525
Well, we'd give you some coffee for it but it got stolen by druids.

>>36145527
Teleporting not your best spell huh?

>>36145589
Bad idea my friend, for reasons I do not want to elaborate.

>>36145543
....The druids.... are stealing from you... Mortimer, did you learn nothing from your time at the thieves guild?

Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>36145545
NOW DIE BOLT OF DARK DREAD!!!
(OOC)doing this on my phone so if it doesnt roll dice sry

>>36145616
..Did you fart?

>>36145584
I want you to think about exactly how bad I can make your life if I set aside all my side projects and just focus on you for a few weeks.

>>36145599
Without my assistants to channel magic to and from, all of my spells are dramatically weakened. I'll admit I rely on my winning smile to get me through these meetings.

>>36145616
Ha! Ive seen more puff out of a novices drake summoning!

>>36145602
I learned a lot. However, I expected that my coffee supplies would be save here. So, are you in or are you out?

>>36145616
Wow that was a very....... lackluster spell. I've seen apprentices do more with a magic missile.

>>36145641
Need to buy some equipment from the artificers or enchanters then.

>>36145616
Disgusting.

Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>36145627
Woops wrong spell i meant BOLT OF ORIONS FURY

>>36145599
What, the king will suspect my "good-faith" souffle? I know that already, I've got contingencies.

>>36145641
>>36145616
I was going to tell you two to take it to the dueling grounds but honestly...

>>36145631
Speaking of side projects, did you get anywhere with that plan to break into the dwarven brewery yet?

>>36145658
Need some firebombs? Im happy to lay down a bombing run if you need it.

>>36145616
Wow... we suck at this.

>>36145658
Yeah, I suppose my torture room has been a little too empty. Give me some time and I'll get you your coffee back.

>>36145670
Worse infinitely worse for all of us.

>>36145668
*redirects it into the sky* To the dueling grounds, no need to repair the guild again.

>>36145616
Pffffhhahahahahahah! Oh my god, my first fire spell had more punch in it than that, and you're suppose to be a threat, Danial you loony, you're more likely to just cause everyone to die laughing!

Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>36145668
Shit, Maw of Planes!!

>>36145723
>>36145668
Do I need to cast some Arcane Silence in here or what?

Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>36145704
Perhaps my bolt of shame is working?
>>36145702
Even if I had, our business deal is off.

Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>36145723
THERES THE REAL DEMON
BLACK VORTEX OF DRETHS MIGHT

>>36145723
*shuts it* Dueling grounds now! OR so help me I'll make you all regret combat casting in the main hall!

Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>36145668
>>36145715
I don't want to duel at all!

MAGICIAN'S SMOKESCREEN

>>36145723
Damn
>>36145702
Sure
>>36145714
You can have a few of the low ranking ones

>>36145715
Is it the thing with the secrets again? That seal still itches.

All I did was send the bolt to another plane!

>>36145751
Oh fine. I promise not to drug your food with extra-dimensional hallucinogens again.
What is my ban list now? i need to start writting this down.

>>36145763
Excellent. Ill send a few students over, they need the throwing practice.

>>36145763
Hmm? oh no, to get what I want i'm going to have to go for the arch druidess. shouldn't be too hard to break her, she's only epic level.

Reporting for duty, even if it seems I'm late once again. What's the topic today?

>>36145780
Yes, yes it is. Guys Im tired and the few spells I have left are warhammers as compared to the rapier my casting usually is. Stop casting in the hall or else.

Rolled 58 (1d100)

Assist with gas cloud!

File: 428669.jpg (986 KB, 4156x2434)

986 KB JPG

Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>36145753
Fine to the grounds we go heretics come forth !

>>36145807
Clothes!

>>36145807
Hey Fryia.

>>36145822
Many thanks, Hishan.

And with this, I bid you all adieu!

>>36145807
Shame your so late, i would imagine the witches (And Garret) would be the most vocal about the clothing discussion.

I say we need more robes with pocket calculators

>>36145807
So, how was your date with Noel? *puts on fireproof smock*

>>36145807
Oh no, here comes the Bitchcraft folks again

>>36145824
Fine, fine. Say, you never did tell me which god you worshiped.

>>36145842
Ah well, we got sidetracked.
inquisitors coming to fight don't help either.

In any case, I'll reiterate that we can simply use glamours and illusions even while the current dress code is in effect.

File: Soros.png (13 KB, 504x399)

13 KB PNG

>>36145814
Go and get some rest, Soros. You've earned it.
Oh, and with the felwar stones I was able to finish your picture.

>>36145824
Taking a celestial form to fight? Going to end badly for you. Plus Dave is gone, don't press this. If I cast i'll be paying out the ear for a new training ground,

>>36145807
Dress codes

>>36145830
Lesbianism rising

>>36145839
See ya.

>>36145871
You want to take this instead Lurco?

>>36145846
He tapped that?

Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>36145871
Dethan the god of life and death. He decides who is granted glory or utter annihalation

>>36145804
Last I heard, she was off visiting a tribe to the south though. Bad luck, Doc.

>>36145807
Was the dress code. Didn't much survive. Typical meeting, and the druids stole our coffee.

>>36145814
Ah, don't worry Soros. Shifted the mana in the hall a bit. Any other spells should fizzle out from lack of supply.

>>36145846
You might need a burnproof smock too, Mortimer. Noel is the head pyromancer. Things like that are important when dealing with them.

>>36145824
So... why did you attack Eldritch Dave again?

>>36145842
Trust me, she'll talk your ear off about clothes and fashion.
>>36145870
Shut up, at least witchcraft is an actual art, Eromancy is just glorified charm spells used by pervy mages.

>>36145814
Of course it is, why would it be anything else?
>>36145807
Dress code. It must be stopped at all costs.

>>36145825
Perfect, I just happen to be an expert on the subject.
My opinion is, robes should be black, blue, green and dark red being the colors allowed. Stars in between 30 and 120, no more, no less, and for the love of the Abyss only true stars taken away from the sky, not those pathetic things I see the rookie wearing nowadays.
>>36145830
My dearest, how are you? Sorry I was too busy to come see you today, I swear I'll make you forgive me later.

>>36145907
>he
>>36145916
Noel, haven't seen you around here since, well, last meeting. How have you been? How was the date?

>>36145907
Wait, you think Noel is a dude? If so, nice knowing you. Now don't mind me as I slowly back away

>>36145846
It wasn't- I mean.

Just shut up or coffee will be the last of your concern.

>>36145909
Yeah, for her. Be right back gents.
*Disappears from sight*

>>36145891
Much obliged. I would rest, but I do not think it wise at this juncture.

>>36145907
She. Flyja and Noel are both girls.

>>36145909
Most of them anyway, thanks.

>>36145923
Murphy's coefficient of unfortunate events and all.

>>36145943
*hands Mortimer a fire resistance potion*

>>36145962
SO how was your date Noel?

>>36145894
Sure, even if I am torn to shreds the current contract my cult has with a certain god let's us resurrect three days later in top shape.
>>36145908
Huh, neat. Then we should use spells that pertain to our gods then.

>>36145907
Why does every keep confusing me for a boy?! I walk around in a minidress!

>>36145934
That's er... well you see, we were hoping to come to conclude with something that'd permit the male members of the guild to wear something besides robes.

Personally, I'd recommend permitting skirts or kilts for male members, the improved airflow aids when casting certain spells.

>>36145978
"BUT THAT'S FORBIDDEN LOVE!"

>>36145962
I doubt it.
>>36145972
Well this is going to be intresting

>>36145978
Well, I didn't have to clean up afterwards, so clearly not as well as Lupa and Anfarthon's was.

>>36145962
>>36146008

THE SHIP TRAIN!
HAS NO BRAKES!
>>36145972
Well, glad to see ya fellow mages, I- NINE HELS NO
NOT HIM
KEEP HIM AWAY.

>>36145934
Not in front of the rest of the council, Fryia!

>>36145991
Noel, I can barely see the floor with my hat brim this low, Im sure you're lovely.

The mages guild is very progressive right now, im sure youll be fine.

>>36145916
Would be talking to the wrong man.
Most alchemists end up looking the same, just different coloured leather straps and different buckle styles. Mind, we could go for a more efficient waistcoat, for the formal occasions.

>>36145962
>>36145991
Oh, so it went well then? I recommend the canal down by three street. They have a rather good couples boating thing going on of late, one of them even painted a tunnel pink and with hearts. Something about a tunnel of love.
If your into that sort of thing.

>>36146029
Hahahahaha, I kid of course.

>>36146021
Hello, would you like to help me destroy the Druids for stealing my coffee supplies?

>>36146008
Telling a mage something is forbidden is like telling an orc he can't hit something. They'll do it and enjoy it.

>>36146014
*snirk* Indeed. But fire can clean very well when guided by the right hands.

>>36146021
Scared Cromina?

>>36146029
Honestly, if anything a committed relationship is a welcome sight in this place. I may be biased on the subject, but I do not support one night stands.
>>36146021
Oh, Cromina has arrived. How have you been?

>>36146074
Last i heard Andarthon, you had your relationships written in contract, is that true?

>>36145934
Come on, my dear, we all know that the only subject in which bitches, I mean, witches are experts about is turning people to frogs and seducing men to their demise and a thousand years in Hell.

The truth is, our dress code must be remade on less strict rules. Beautiful and young mages should be encouraged to expose their glorious bodies, since perfection is what we all aim for. We need more European tailormancers, since the ones we have around here make me sick with their satin hats.

>>36146074
What about you and Lupa ?

>>36145962
>>36145934
C'mon Noel. You only disabled the obvious scrying spells. Half the facility was watching. We're only asking to be polite, really. Also, mana dead zone.

>>36145972
I really should have been expecting that. I will inform the druids that they will be promoting some one. Right after we get that damn coffee back.

>>36146035
Ah, I heard excellent reviews there. Haven't been able to visit the city lately though. Any new good restaurants?

>>36146021
Calm down. Doc's just going to liberate an archdruidess of her life.

>>36146098
>relationships
I may be a newcomer in the world of emotions, but sadness is an easy one to recognize.

Right, so I will not really be able to attend the rest of this meeting because I have to teach one of my night classes. So don't try to get yourselves killed while I'm gone, alright?

>>36146029
Dear asmodeus, than you for taking the brakes away from the ship train
>>36146055
You convinced me before the whole coffee thing
>>36146056
>>36146074
Now someone WILL explain why stabby is allowed to set foot in the hall again? Keep him away for Asmodeus sake.
And to stay in thread has anyone seen the elf? She should be somewhere we can see her at all times, dammit.

>>36146108
Life? Don't you mean virginity?

>>36146108
YOU WERE WHAT?!

>>36146133
He's just too sneaky, we can't stop him. We can't even stop him from groping every ass in sight.
>>36146131
Don't have too much fun.

>>36146106
That would be my bias on the subject. The two 'engagements' we had led to my banishment from the Empyrean Council. We aren't exactly on romantic terms. I don't think we ever really were.
>>36146133
If it were up to me, he'd be in a Psionic Penitentiary somewhere. But the Archmage seems to tolerate him among non-mages.

>>36146029
Right, sorry dear. I promised, I know.
>>36146021
Afraid, little girl?

>>36146146
I want it noted that I wasn't watching. That is invading your privacy, and I would not want to do that.

>>36146131
I'll be here to keep things halfway sane, don't worry Lupa most of us will still be here when you get back.

>>36146133
Told you we need to update our wards and guards. Plus the blighter is fast and sneaky. He doesn't antagonize us we don't screw with him.

>>36146142
Both more than likely.

>>36146146
Over half the facility was watching until you went back to your room for "fun time." I cut the feed then.

>>36146108
The Guilded Mare is rather good for a meal, quiet too. If you want something interesting, and frankly, some of the best maids in town, i suggest Harkroons bar on the bayside. Just don't piss off the dwarves.

>>36146121
Im sure we will find you someone old boy, If anything, we can always ask the fleshcrafters to make you someone. Its not the first time weve done such a thing, the old arch chancellor's wife was one if i remember correctly. I was the one who found her toes.

>>36146108
You will do no such thing.

Mortimer, I need some assistance here. OPF that's tender. She nicked me with a spell before I could bring her down, I need you to take my knife and stab it just above my left kidney. I'll also need you to take her to my torture room in the sewers.

>>36146146
I had nothing to do with it.

>>36146200
Done and done sir

>>36146194
Ah, about that feed. How much did you want for the premium subscription again? I need to keep up to date on the relationships in the guild.

>>36146194
Oh god, that means you heard all the things I said on the way to my room-
>>36146202
Shut up, you had something to do with this.

Hear ye oh hear ye, I have arrived!
T'was a good night which followed our last meeting, friends! I come with two kegs of ale for my weary and tired friends, for I know that your magic may have purged you of your need to eat and drink, but it hath not taken your thirst for merriment!
Drink and be merry, friends!

>>36146200
NO MORE
Get the hell away from here, Stabby, this is for real, go away from this guild and stop touching my butt or I'll shove fire so far where it is not supposed to be that you will vomit nothing but volcanoes.

>>36146214
Son, are you sure you don't want to come back to work with me? You're a right natural at Stabupuncture.

>>36146241
That is if you can actully catch him of course

Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>36145981
Yes we should demon scum

Rolled 11, 13 = 24 (2d20)

>>36146241
"I have no idea what you are talking about."
Rolling for bluff and magehand

>>36146142
Both probably.
>>36146146
Scrying. It was in a nice open place, under one of my scrying points in the sky. Good choice in scenery, by the way.
>>36146194
I didn't know about this though. I was viewing from halfway across the world. On the plus side, we've introduced lesbianism to an eastern tribe of birdpeople.
>>36146196
I'll keep that in mind. Also, that new power system should be ready within a few days. Forgot to mention it earlier.

Ah, is that the time?
I must be off, it was nice seeing you all.
Good day.

Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>36145911
Tainted shipments of magical supplies

>>36146231
But I didn't! I even have a legitimate alibi! I was slipped a bunch of drugs that made delusional! Even if I did do it, I wouldn't be responsible.

>>36146273
Truth be told my Cult is currently worshiping Jugalo, a god of chance and miracles. So, you wanna go first?

>>36146253
Sir, I'm 500 century's old. Also thanks but no thanks, I enjoy my job here to much. Plus, it would mean that the maid wins, and we can't have that now can we.

>>36146231
Is someone bothering you, my dear? I'll have his family cursed in no time, just tell me.
>>36146241
So it WAS him, at least?
captcha derphour contained. No sir, the derp is not contained here.

>>36146196
Lupa is head Fleshcrafter and is insanely possessive and insane. Bad idea since they were once an item.

>>36146200
You'll need an antidote as well, spell was poisoned. Something you weren't immune too.

>>36146228
500 gold a month. Nothing untoward unless they do it outside. Then it's a learning experience for them.

>>36146231
Sorry, if I don't regulate it. Someone else would have shown the entire thing. As it is I can see too much of it.

>>36146279
Wow you suck at this.

>>36146285
Keikakku Doori

>>36146302
Can't have that at all can we?

>>36146311
not that anyone can prove

>>36146285
You just can't scry on my date you weirdo- I mean my dinner- ARGH!

>>36146302
That maid scares me. I think she tried to seduce me for my book of dirt on all of you.

>>36146298

Tell me of some miracles, devourer of devils!

>>36146294
The heck did that have to do with our resident stage magician?

File: Cromina.png (14 KB, 504x399)

14 KB PNG

>>36146241
Calm down, Cromina, please! Here, have a portrait!

>>36146320
hahaha that's with out the modifiers.

>>36146323
*Waves about recording orb* That's what you think.

>>36146333
Yup. She's a drow after all.

>>36146329
Could have been much worse if you didn't take it to your room afterwards.

>>36146338
The inquisitor isn't that bright....

>>36146311
Just feeling a little humiliated, again.

>>36146329
I still feel bad about allegedly being responsible for a few kidnappings. I can recommend a place in a magic-dead zone with excellent food. Price is a bit high up there, but I do hire the absolute best cooking staff.

>>36146329
No need to worry, dearest, no need indeed. Just let me memorize face and name of this "ivan ferrus" and tomorrow his homeland will be a wasteland.
>>36146285
Stop harassing noel, please, and do not scry on her dinners with me.

>>36146320
>once an item.
I wish it were so, but it was really just a short fling. Either way, I would not want someone made to love me, I want only true love.

>>36146370
*Holds up a broken tape* "That's what I know."

>>36146335
Why, one day we all turned blue! We thought it was strange but we later accidentally summoned a demonic worm! But, as it turns out, the worm could not see things that were blue so we managed to easily kill it.

>>36146393
In theory that could be arranged.

Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>36146320
500? I should have that stashed away in my study somewhere...

>>36146363
No, no, you did it again, I felt someone touching my butt! You are so dead, Doc, sooo dead. Assistant! Fetch my polearms!
>>36146362
... weird, I am a redhead.

>>36146409
>baleful glare
>>36146422
Not anymore you aren't. Pictomancy tends to have that effect. You could always ask him to change it, though.

>>36146394
*laughs* so you Think little rogue, so you think.


>>36146409
No, you know how I feel about mind magic. Besides Lupa would kill both him and you.

>>36146422
Artistic license.