>>36248266
It might appear to be in poor taste, but I vote for the establishment of a quidditch team. The rules are made up and the points don't matter, but from the looks of things it will kill off a good number of the players and discourage the rest. That way we can have the scholarships on the book but don't have to actually award it to anybody.

>>36248266
I suggest battle chess scholarships.

Oh ye illustious mages. I am but a simple knight errant of the Order of Interns. I have recently finished my internship with the Knights of Black and it seems that I might graduate and join them, but please, hear my troubles! It seems I need to enter a pact with one o the Mage's Guild as to be able to perform my duties. What does this pact contain, and, would one of your students be willing to?

>>36248464
Basically the mage empowers you helps enchant your gear, in return you guard the mages and run quests for him. You'll need a scribe or lawmagus to write up the contract.

>>36248382
Weakling. What is it, none in this guild able to do some caber tossing or running or axe throwing?
And since we are are, tell me soros, didi fryia get a new body? Have not seen her since, you know, that day.

>>36248553
Battle chess is turn by turn ritualized combat Cromina with real people as the pieces. Takes tactical knowledge as well as strength, endurance and magical power to win. As far as Fryja goes the Fleshwarpers are still working on her body. The first try had far too many tentacles.

>>36248596
That's hardly surprising. Please tell me again why did we allow warpers to be part of this guild anymore, they don't even do magic.

Why don't we accept scholarships for "Sport Support Services" and categorize them as sports. We could, say, grant scholarships for especially good enchanters who help their team reach victory by lighting the balls on fire, or skilled Biomancers who do work as on the job healers.

The fulfills the legal loophole without requiring us to admit a bunch of jocks.

Have you lot ever though of just changing the law to suit your wants instead of looking for loop holes?

>>36248644
Yeah... sorry about that, when the guild opened the doors to alchemists we kind of let in a few others who tagged along.

>>36248708
Have you even followed the law once in your lifetime, doc?

I hear by motion for the acceptance of Illusion sports. We accept additional illusion students to create illusionary teams that compete in whatever sport they fancy at the time. We get official "sports teams", fill the loophole, and don't let a bunch of jocks in.

>>36248708
Are you implying we should do a wizard lobby to put pressure on the King's council ? Ridiculous.

>>36248727
When it suits me. Have you?

>>36248731
So we have a fantasy football team?

>>36248727
I saw him stop at a traffic policeman's whistle once.

>>36248745
More or less. Fantasy to us, real to outsiders.

>>36248644
Yes they do due magic. Just usually very hit and miss. Trying to build a living organism isn't easy and takes a lot of fine-tuning and guesswork. When they do get it right the results are usually terrifying and damn useful.
>>36248708
Do you want to live in magocracy stabby?
>>36248731
Between the few magical sports we have and this we should b covered.

ACTUAL CRICKETS

>>36248731
Well, we can just cite health and safety and have magical sports be illusions.

>>36248745
Eh, nothing wrong with a little football for those who want it. Its certainly no were near as bad as allowing rugby players to join.

Or, god forbid, muscle wizards. While quite charming, they tend to remove walls all too frequently.

>>36248731
That's fucking stupid. Wizards around here are either too fat or too and weak, they should do more exercise dang it, you all saw Conspierre struggling even to it ashburn during the drow assault.
>>36248744
Obviously. Chaos is for loosers.
>>36248760
I'm not going to believe you without proves. Heck, even if you have them.

>>36248767
Sure. it'd be all the easier to rule from the shadows.

>>36248821
I thought you used to be of the chaotic alignment.

>>36248767
Dropped nametag

>>36248857
Easier to gets slaughtered or pressed into a totalitarian regime you mean. Not all mages are easy marks especially once they get entrenched. Like that druidess who escaped you and took most of you shit.

>>36248857
Wizards make commoners and ungifted people uneasy, it's hard to get by in politics in this condition.

>>36248821
I agree with you, even though I don't actually have a physical form to maintain. This guild ought to remain at least somewhat healthy, we have a poor reputation as fragile and wizened.

On another note, the School of Legalistic Magecraft has accepted twenty new members! Since this is its first active year, and I am the only current teacher, we've nearly hit the cap.

>>36248266
It's simple. We only accept those with an aptitude for magical sports.

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>>36248875
She's an Eldritch Knight. As Lawful Evil as they come.

>>36248895
You have obviously now visited the Alchemists range.

In alchemy you have at least one of two things. Fast (and fit) or smart. Or else you don't last long

>>36248882
>>36248821
Reporting for duty, as always.
This body feels... strange. I'm not quite used to it but it is the best I can get, probably, though... though, I'm sorry, you all. What happened last time was my fault and should have foreseen it instead of putting everyone into that kind of danger.

>>36248821
I very seriously doubt we need many more muscle wizards about. Plenty of us have more important interests to be studying than strength magic.

Also that drow assault was promptly dealt with by the visiting Paladin University students who were studying light magic; or have you forgotten them constantly shouting "If only I could be so grossly incandescent!" after the fact.

>>36248882
You forget that we live in a rock/paper/scissor universe. I an the scissor to your paper. also thanks for the warning. I'll be sure to add some extra mind breaking to her.

>>36248942
After the attack I was to busy being the hero and being poisoned, thank you so much
>>36248930
Good to see someone remembering it, geez..
>>36248941
Here you are, Fryia. Please don't get me started, yes, you put us in danger but it is basically your daily routine here so who gives?

>>36248934
Oh sure, many of us are physically fit. But the average person does not see us as such.

>>36248941
It is alright, Fryia. Your insight into the matter has been invaluable in the investigation.
>>36248953
We do not live in such an easily defined world. Each person acts not only for themselves, but as a member of the whole.

>>36248895
Good for you Anfarthon. Will you be trying to get together with the other departments for real world application training or not?

>>36248941
So they got it finished? Let me take a look at you Fryja. Also don't talk like that shit happens.

>>36248953
Too late she's already gone, left as soon as she was sure you weren't around. Good thing you had a secondary loot stash.

>>36248942
We have a logbook of what happened here: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/36142315/

>>36248266
Cricket?
Isn't that some sort of backwards Baseball or something?
>>36248329
Fuck Hogwarts.

>>36249007
My "insight" was being the host to Jheska's soul. Why are you being so kind with me after you came to know everything, you should cast me away into the blind eternities...

>>36249014
>We have a logbook

My apologies, I must have been remembering something from another time.

>>36249014
>Will you be trying to get together with the other departments for real world application training or not?
Many of the students plan to be either advokists (magical lawyers, for those not aware), who will probably be working heavily with the Conspiromancers among us (we know you're there.)
The others are likely to become runecasters, general lawmagi, and so on. They'll be heavily entwined with Bureacromancy.
However, we will likely tie in to other fields as well depending on the occasion. Divination, in fact, is likely to come up during our discussions on the extent of privacy and the lawful applications of divination.

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>>36249014
I can assure you she is still their.

Would you like to see her?

>>36248266
Why is this even a problem?
From what I know, card games are considered sports nowadays, and believe me, I'm no stranger to lining up my pockets with the money of gambling dolts. Hell, even wargaming is considered sports nowadays.
Just give me a couple students who got excellent marks in Arithmancy and Mathemagiks, and in a couple of weeks, our guild will have more gold than we might ever need AND the loophole will be filled.

>>36248789
Ew, no, no crickets. They're annoying.

>>36248941
>>36249046
Good to see you on your feet and with your mind intact, eh, how much do you remember of the incident?

>>36249007
Well, that's because we had to move the runners range underground due to the, and i quote, 'excessive' use of explosives.

damn well show them excessive, when the north half of the city falls into the sea...

ahem.

>>36249046
One she blindsided me and I had been scrutinizing her for years. Hell I hated the bitch. You loved her as your mentor. If she could fool me she could fool nearly anyone. *peers at body* Likeness is perfect, but they added a few thing they didn't need too. Might want to talk to them about that.

>>36249048
Of course.

>>36249075
Alright then I look forward to working with you.

>>36249077
Already have, that facsimile you have is pretty good though.

>>36249034
Seconded, Quidditch is not that great, that staff between my legs rub me the wrong way-in every sense
>>36249046
I said stop complaining. Everything is back at normal. Kinda. Mage guild normal,that's it.

>>36248942
Hm, sounds like a paladin I knew back when I was an apprentice, cheery fellow.

Bah, I keep forgetting why i'm here. I need some help, I seem to have picked up this cursed Doll. I mean it's really adorable and all but I find it really annoying to have it following me everywhere.

Dr.Stabby looks around but the doll is missing.

Uh-oh

>>36248266
A legal loophole you say? Does it say that the apprentices we accept need to be alive? Else we could bump up our "sport scholarship" count by accepting skeletons. I keep a couple of ones in the guild anyway for defensive purposes, might as well make use of that.

>>36248941
Good to have you back Fryia.

>>36249172
Yeah you might want to run to church. Like right now.

>>36249187
Living sadly, they added that in.

>>36249172
Good luck with that, your going to need to hire a deamon to get rid of the blasted thing if its what i think it is

>>36248821
>Chaos is for losers.
Whee re-cent taht.

>>36249172
Whee weel keep hit. Lewt ush know wheen you find Eet.

>>36249134
But what if she can pull the same trick again? Every tie I go to bed I can see her smug face, smiling at me... then I fall asleep terrified that she could take over me during the night and walk around in my body doing who knows what...
>>36249091
Oh, quin, I... need to talk with you about something, later.
>>36249189
It is good to see you again too, dear.

>>36249219
......Can I please do some dental work on her?
>>36249210
>>36249203
what do you think it is?

>>36248266
Is dueling no longer considered a "sport"?

>>36249203
I guess it's inevitable, the liches and their lawyers have exploited to many loopholes like that as of late. Well it was worth a try at least, now if you excuse me, I got an army of skeletons to arrange in neat rows in the basement.

>>36249259
Ahaha.... Not allowed to say its name lest its attention be... diverted.

But the church is a good place to be going to, like, now. Send a message when your on hallowed ground and ill ship a book along. Im sure i have it somewere.

>>36249225
If you want I can root around in your head to make sure. It will most assuredly not be pleasant for either one of us though. Also talk to the Enchanters about this, they are good at foiling that sort of thing.

>>36249259
High level Deamon trapped in it. It feeds on your life essence (levels) and soul. once it's imprinted on you it will never leave unless the being is about to get free from it's prison. Then it'll hunt you down eat your body and take your soul to be dealt with back home.

>>36249268
It is but most duelists are either tenured or dead these days.

>>36249287
Don't forget to run maintenance on the drow ones, they need special care after sunlight exposure.

>>36249225
Here. I read that witches give people a crow feather as a 'get well gift'.
Unfortunately the books never specified what particular crow that would be so I just found that big old crow that hangs out in the upper levels and got on of his. Hope its enough.

>>36249225
Oh, ok, well I'll be here for a bit longer I guess, got some new recruitment strategies to work out.

>>36248266
Personally, if they pay, I say we let them in. The splendid thing about magic is that willpower is all you actually need, so the sort of people willing to claw and scrape for it despite lacking any magical background become either excellent wizards or beautiful fireballs. Did I miss anything while I was on adventuring leave?

>>36249259
I don't want to know.
>>36249134
Seconded, fuck, I really hated her guts and it seems like we were damn right.
>>36249225
Now this is mostly paranoia form your side, we kill'd her for good, ashburn is gone, what could possibly go wrong?

>>36249259
Wat Ees wrong wheeth hour theeth? Halsho, teh Dahl Ees poe-sesth b-eye kay-oss. Yhou shouwld geev eet to hus.

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I suggest we select a sport for the scholarship which makes equal use of the school's student and faculty talents, in that it is one an actual sport and two requires magically maintained equipment.

I once went to a kingdom that played this game called Boufball. I had the memories recorded on a descripto-disc by our Mesmerics expert - it's available for viewing at the library.

Oh, and the library also has a copy of the rulebook which I got from that faraway land.

Greetings fellow wizards! I am back from my unexpected visit/holiday to my parents. They havent been the same since they put their brains in jars...

>>36249287
Did you receive the skeleton of poor Archibald? I sent him down before I left. Stupid kid thought he juggle the acid jugs...I swear, my students get dumber every week.

>>36249341
Eh not much, some discussion about our guild attire, and i kind of got found out feeding extra dimensional hallucinogens to a fellow.

Been rather quiet really.

>>36249268
Fencing is, yes.
What we do during duels isn't.

>>36249342
Rings hollow with the damage she did. Our vigilance failed.

>>36249333
Oh, this is... I mean, do you realize the one I gave you were a trap Jheska set up, don't you? I-I can not believe you are still wanting to be w-with me...
>>36249340
Ok, then, I-I need to go write a letter so please stay here until I'm finished.

>>36249395
Well, a sporting wizard usually ends up a dead wizard.
There is no room for honour in magic if you want to stay alive.

>>36249344
Dr.Stabby tenses up and the addresses you

you know what, You can have it. Enjoy.

Dr.Stabby turns around and waits for you to remove the doll that stabbing him in the back. A lot.

>>36249341
Depends on how long you have been gone, I seem to recall the Prank War with the Druids was still in effect when you left though. It's not an issue any more, I finally had enough and dealt with it.

>>36249384
I think he is down there yes, and I'm getting the same feeling. I lost three apprentices last week alone, three in a WEEK!

Though to be fair, one of them died in the attack on the guild. A shame, he seemed competent.

>>36249419
Yeah but who gives, no long-lasting damage, no side effects, we won, they lost. What's your point?

>>36249465

I see you've found one of Elzevir's dolls. Thought we destroyed all of them years ago...

>>36249465
Tahnk Yhou. Whee weel lahv heem hand caddle heem hand kahl heem George.

>>36249395
>>36249449
Guile and Treachery will always overcome Youth and skill. Or so my experience has taught me.

>>36249483
Fryja's confidence is in shambles, I lost a LOt of power due to several curses that decided to rear their ugly heads. Much of the guild and it's resources were destroyed, and Ashburn is still out there. He quite likely kept a fragment of Jheska's soul as well if he played it smart.

>>36249520
Dr.Stabby stabs himself in the back until the bleeding stops.

>>36249432
Don't worry about it Fryia

>>36249477
Oh, we're losing apprentices? I'll have to take note of that next class. The Science Lab is notoriously dangerous; ans as I'be said, my apprentices aren't the sharpest tools in the shed. You'd think they'd learn not to go into the photonic resonance chamber as its prepping for the experiment. Four of them *poof* photonized.

>>36249203
Oh, I have it! The other necromancers and and I can make a team of intelligent undead, and put them up as our team. When they say that undead don't count, the intelligent undead sue for discrimination. I could even get one of them a spot as a paralegal at my new law firm. Those bastards owe me a favor after throwing my last lawyer into the deepest pit in hell.

The catch is the whole team drains life force with touch. Football championship, here we come!

>>36249477
There was an attack on the guild? What sort of septuply witless madman would risk the attempt... I wasted my adventuring leave, when I could have had the same fun here?

>>36249540
We are rebuilding.

The bright side of being stuck underground is its allot harder to destroy.

>>36249575
You need any more of your chemical mix again Hearsch? The boys can whip it up sharpish, the ones who cant are dead already.

>>36249550
Whould Yhou liek sahm heelp? Peer-haps George cahn heelp?

>>36249540
>>36249553

> A crow enters the guild hall, then disappears after dropping a letter, with Fryia being nowhere to be seen.

>>36249575
I swear you just make up those words,

>>36249577
They explicitly ban all draining creatures in sports, ever since that vampire fiasco ten years back.

>>36249589
Jheska le tAshburn and the drow get really close and they attacked.
We kept logs. Here:http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/36142315/

And here:http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/36163839/

>>36249606
Still neither side gained much a lost a great deal.

>>36249639
What's this? *proceeds over to Noel and opens it*

>>36249606
Have you told their families that they're dead yet? If not, I have an ongoing experiment about tutoring magically skilled intelligent undead. We could even use them for the football team.

>>36249589
I missed most of it myself due to bad timing so I'm not the best person to explain what happened. However we were betrayed by one of our own who brought a drow army, the guild was in pretty bad shape when I returned, not what I would describe as "fun".

Okay well now that that is solved I have a druidess to check on and maybe recapture. Oh and before I go, Just though you all should know, that one drow, J something, is no longer corporeally or Living challenged. Or tied up in my basement. so there is that.

>>36249616
George does not have a doctorate in stabupuncture.

>>36249658
Well, we know what their capable of now, so we can build improvements into the thing.

>>36249661
Not yet, the post owl keeps getting lost. I think the last i saw it was when it tried to fly across the acid cauldron with the vapours and all.

>>36249658
What does the letter say?

>>36249658
>Letter open and fold itself before starting to talk

>First of all, let me thank you. I wish to give my thanks to all of the guild for the years I'm glad to have spent with you, and especially to those of you who were at my side last meeting
>The reason I'm writing this letter is I can no more stand among you. My whole life was but a lie, the cruel experiment of the woman I deemed to be my guide; all of th fighting, cursing, teaching, laughing, crying- all was but a passage to make my body into the perfect vessel for Jheska to reincarnate. I can not fathom the dept of her villany, for such a cruel yet powerful being could have more plans going on that I can possibly imagine. She was the person I looked up as the mother I never had, yet to her I was nothing but a pawn.
>After what happened last time I can't even think of what's next. It is possibile that Jheska could reincarnate herself even by nothing but my memories of her; as such my presence here at the guild is a danger I don't want you to be exposed to.
>I hereby resign from the position of Head of the Witchcraft Faculty and nominate Quin as my successor. She is talented for a being so young and I'm sure she will become great under your guidance.
>cont

>>36249740
> To Soros, Cromina, Anfarthon, Conspierre, Mortimer, Bastun, Randolph, Lurco. You did so much for me, yet I have nothing to give you as a payback for your operate that I deem to be enough. Even if your actions, and sometimes your intentions, were not always for the best, you fought bravely and assisted me in my our of need. For you, I have poured all of the memories I had from what I saw in those moment when my soul and Jheska's one shared a single body in a magical scroll, hoping it will lead you to solve this mistery and finally save this guild for sure. Also you can take everything you deem as useful from my room- I won't need it anymore.
>And finally, I don't think I have enough that could match what you did for me, Noel. Wasn't it for you I'd had been probably leave Jheska take over my mind. My Cloak of Black Feathers is yours to take, the very symbol of my power and status as Fryia the Crow and artifact of considerable power. Accept it, as you accepted me, as the first true gift I give you by my free will, and as the promise that one day, when it will look like you can't go on anymore, I will be there for you, strong enough to lift your burden. Until that day, farewell, my dearest.

>>36249701
Excellent. If you'd be so kind as to let me arrange the... funeral proceedings. I'll file their contracts allowing for their remains to be used for science within the week.

>>36249658
Eh, we can add it to the lawsuit. We could go so far as to claim that it's discriminatory against exchange students from the negative plane.

>>36249606

Oh no, I've decided to remove the Potassium Hydroelectric Nitrate experiments from the curriculum. Went from a room of 60 students to 13.

>>36249648
The perks of being a science wizard.

>>36249658
I remember that vampire fiasco. Should still have a tape of it in my office.

>>36249661
An interesting experiment, I happen to have a few recently dead ex-apprentices you can use. Though I can't really vouch for their intelligence, considering how they died.

>>36249692
You kept a fragment of her soul and resurrected her didn't you? Leave now or I will mess you up.

>>36249701
True but they know not to underestimate those they did as well.

>>36249720
This>>36249740

>>36249763
Ok who's up for tracking her down and bringing her back?

>>36249772
Tried and failed since they kill the people they drain. Undead aren't popular here.

>>36249790
It was fun to watch.

>>36249740
>>36249763
-
Well, FUCK.
>>36249720
Let's put it this way, you got promoted.

>>36249658
I guess that explains why it smells like underdark in here. A thousand apologies for failing to intervene. If there is anything myself or my apprentices can do to help repair the damage done we are, as always, at the guild's disposal.

>>36249819
Do not, soros. She is not in the shape to do anything useful, not to mention she is the last tie Jheska had on this school. We will fare better without her for the moment.

>>36249819
>Dr.Stabby already left
>Implying Dr.Stabby didn't use the whole damn soul. For shame Ms.Soros. For shame.

>>36249740
>>36249763
*reads the letter*
She nominates me for what!?
*faints*

>>36249772
Feel free, gods know im not burying them.
Do mind the apprentices, they may have use done or two cadavers for bomb implant practice.

>>36249790
Very well, let me know if you need anything else, The vats are always bubbling for science.

>>36249819
Eh. Considering the sheer influx of necromancers of late, i doubt they will be quite as prepared if they come back.

YOU'RE ALL NERDS RAYS ARE THE BEST.

>>36249887
Witch Queen or whatever the fuck is the name for the head skimpy female caster. Congratulations.

>>36249907
kek

>>36249907
Saila, Go scrub out the crystalite beast pens please.

>>36249740
>>36249763
Fryia......

>>36249819
Bah, very well. What of constructs? I've been meaning to study the returning of life to a cadaver without infusing it with negative energy.

>>36249906
So noted. I finished my back up body last week.

As an aside, is there any coffee left?

>>36249878
The dumbass Stabby brought her back already, using a part of her soul.

>>36249884
I'm Male you incompetent nitwit who loosed a plague on the world. Also I know I grabbed moist of her with that annihilate so it had to be a fragment.

>>36249906
Double the gain in the ranks of the paladin.

>>36249926
<Luminous Curse>

>>36249952
Not allowed under the tireless clause.

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>>36248266
Ah, there should be no issue there! Our department is full of strapping young lads ready and willing to take a flying leap into unknown waters - organising a swim team and taking on new students who are both magically and hydrodynamically gifted should be easy as elementary elementalism! Hahah!

>>36249964
Hmmmmm. I think muscle wizards may be the best option, as horrifying as it is to consider.

>>36249952
Yes. Just don't let Soros know.

>>36249964
Soros, what do you mean you grabbed moist?

>>36250001
Most, Still have trouble speaking sometimes after the attack. Let me know what?

>>36249998
Battle chess too.

>>36249925
But I don't deserve this. I left the department because I was scared shitless of Jheska, I left them! How can I go back and lead them!? And I have so much work setting up the Magical Girls Department, I mean sure, I still haven't been able to get any magical girls to join but still. And I need new robes if I'm supposed to head the Wichcraft Faculty, and I could never live up to Fryia and, and, and... I need to sit down for a bit.

>>36249952

I wouldnt advise any kind of non-negative energy raise dead. Both from experience, and due to >>36249964

>>36249991
Oh goody, waterboys.

>>36249942
CAN I DO IT WITH RAYS?

>>36249964
WHAT?
>>36249943
Looks like you were not enough of a reason to get her to stay here. Or maybe you were too important for her to risk your life again. I don't know, love is, you know... well, I don't.

OK, harvesting time! What marvelous item shall I fetch from her coffins first, her daemon-slashing sword maybe? Shame Noel get the coak, it is the fuckingest cloak ever

>>36250035
Were we kept the Gin. Third cupboard on the left. Don't mind the dried frog pills next to it.

>>36250051
Yes. Rays upon rays of fire and water.

Please note, if you let the fires get out of hand, i will make you pay for it.

>>36249991
Swimming is a vile practice. Whatever madness posesses you people to hurl yourself into the monster-choked hell that is the ocean I'll have no part in.

>>36250086
Gold pay for monster gizzards for alchemical components.

>>36250053
See>>36249692
and>>36249884
Cromina. I tagged him with a Luminous Curse if you want to beat the shit out of him.

>>36250084
Me drinking alcohol is a bad idea.

>>36250084
FUCK YOU YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD

>>36250043
Ah, Noel! You're looking... at my students. Stow that stare, would you kindly?

>>36250086
It's a simple sort of madness, my friend - whatever monsters there are in the abyss, there are few things more horrifying than a capable - and slightly tipsy - hydromancy student!

>>36250109
Yeah well.
One of those times eh?

>>36250111
FUCK YOU AND DO YOUR CHORES.
Damn kids.

>>36250111
Dont make us take away your Gamma Ray!

>>36250133
More or less, never had the best constitution and with all the flare up, me getting drunk would be likely. It would be a bad thing.

Zzzz.. ah! Apologies, I, er, was meditating.

I haven't missed anything important have I?

>>36250162
Stabby Resurrected Jheska, and I tagged him with a luminous curse. Also Fryja ran away because she though she was a threat before stabby told us.

>>36250133
FUCK YOU I'M RUNNING AWAY TO BECOME AN UNSEEN SEER

>>36250108
... You people are aware that when you use the loanword Al-Khemiya, the prefix al basically just means "the", right?

>>36250039
Well you better be ready now because she thought, apparently, you are. Which do not make sense if you ask me but who gives? Witches be witches.
>>36250109
HOW IN THE NAME OF THE NINE HELLS DID HE-
-fuck. No, I am not, fuck him, we have priorities like rebuilding the freakin'wards. I just *know* she the drow will come back some day, she just need to track back fry-
-fuck. Again.
>>36250162
Fryia left.

>>36250193
Then you'd be under my jurisdiction child, no rays for you.

>>36250205
Likely did it so he could fuck her. Wonder why she didn't kill him.

>>36250053
Just how powerful is this cloak?

>>36250205
>>36250192
And people suggested I should trust Stabby. He's nothing but chaotic, that one.

>>36248266
Does anyone else read this like the wizard is seriously just tired and listless like the only reason a mage guild exists is because the kingdom said it had to?

>>36250225
I CAN RAYS ANYWAYS. YOU CAN'T STOP ME. I'M GONNA SUMMON EYES AND SHOOT RAYS FROM THEM TOO

RAYS FOREVER.

>>36250162
Just undeserved promotions... say, you wouldn't happen to know what the guild rules say about heading two departments at once? I need to know if I can keep both offices.

>>36250205
I agree, it makes no sense! But if that's what she wanted I will have to do my best.

>>36250129
Go swim in some raw sewage, waterboys, I am not in your mood for you, or your squirt gun magics.

>>36250197
Languages evolve, if i speak the language that the loan word came from, then ide give a fuck, but i dont, so i do not care.

>>36250193
Well then, do clean your stuff out of your room, more storage space is welcome.

Oh and dinner will be at 5 like usual.

>>36250162
And we have a swim team now.

>>36250246
Thats it, im taking apart your Gamma Ray. None of those rays for a week

>>36250237
Never trust a rogue, tolerate but never trust them.

>>36250246
<Anti Magic Suspension>

>>36250225
Who cares. I mean, she should have because at least this would have meant she had one redeeming act to call upon.
>>36250236
That's talking. I see we were right thinking you only wanted her for her body.
It it, like, powerful. I don't know how much, I mean, it is like a relic, an ancient artifact. Maybe. Fuck, it is just more powerful than all of my magical bling together.

>>36250261
That is, somehow, even more revolting than swimming in the actual ocean, and the ocean is roughly half kraken and krakenshit by weight.

>>36250261
Hah. Well. I seem to get far less respect when I don't look my age. Remember who's offering the viable solution here!

By the gods, I cannot stop shouting when I'm like this!

>>36250304
I was not only interested in her for her body! How dare you even accuse me that! Its just that she never talked about this cloak and witchy artifacts were never my forte.

>>36250322
Which solution would that be?
Explosions work for me. Well, that and poisons.

>>36250293
>>36250267
>>36250277
YOU'RE JUST MAD BECAUSE I CAN TURN OTHER SPELLS INTO RAYS

>>36250322
Percy, weren't you the one always bitching about "old wizards should not act as youg ones"? What the fuck has gotten into you?
>>36250346
Sure. You planning to do what then, go chase your unrequited love?

>>36248266
Yes yes, while promotions and demotions are all well and good the average life span of a wizard around here means there's going to be a new position soon enough anyway so lets keep this on task. Namely what of inner-school matches of whatever sport it is? Lets face it, even among fellow havens of arcane academia we're seen as unethical louts who tend to specialize in making murder art (looking at you stabby) rather than any semblance of discipline or sportsmanship.

And while I know that some colleagues are still harried by their memories of being struck by the local blacksmith when they were a child we can not allow that stigma to get in the way of stifling the potential of future mages.

I propose that we make a scholarship based on battlemages and others who mix martial prowess with their intellect to compete in sport. The new influx of students can cut down on casualties when doing field research while also teaching the rest of the students not to pigeonhole themselves into only one area of study.

By doing this we better our reputation not only among other wizarding schools but with the general populace by showing them that we're not just a group of cackling madmen held up in towers defiling the laws of the universe.

>>36250258
Guild policies allow for one person to head two departments, and technically an indefinite amount. However, this is usually limited because few mages have mastered a school beyond their own to the point that they can become its head.
>>36250277
Lovely, I shall have to attend one of the meets.
>>36250360
Calm yourself, Saila. Yours is a perfectly respectable art, but it is of no benefit to anyone to have you shouting like this.

>>36250304
You can track him down if you want I tagged him. Also low blow Cromina, she burns you I did not see a thing.

>>36250322
Need to strike a balance in age, Old enough to be in charge young enough to not be creaky.

>>36250360
Who can't now endure your suspension student.

>>36250372
Wasn't unrequited from what I saw.

>>36250360
If this extends to summoning then I am morbidly curious.

>>36250360
You talking to the man who turns spells into potions for a living. Saila, i am sorry to say your just not that special. We are both outstripped by the high end casters anyway.

Now please calm down.

>>36250396
That would certainly be interesting, but wouldn't it just equate to a light show plus a normal summon?

>>36250372
>unrequited
You seem to be misusing that term.

>>36248266
Sorry I'm late boys. Had to deal with Flipper and his little tantrum.

And just to be clear, I'm totally okay with just having cricket players and other such athletes apprentice under me with no real requirements. Could use the extra muscle.

>>36250379
My faculty does that yet but you know how difficult it is to make the other wizards into some kind of physical activity? I have to whip them. Both figuratively and not.
>>36250393
One day, soros, one day. What I want to track now is a drow ghost.
>>36250416
Maybe. Look, I'm sleepy, messy, still not in shape after the battle. I do errors.

>>36250352
The swim team, of course! Can't have anyone complain that the guild doesn't hold course with sports scholarships if we have an active sporting team, now, can we?

>>36250372
>>36250393
Ah, but after the last meeting I attended, I thought it was worth investing some time into trying out a younger body - this one's made using Aqueous Form, so I can hold it indefinitely!

Certainly shouts too much, though! Maybe I ought to put on twenty years or so, lose a bit of the piping!

>>36250426
Don't you already have enough vat grow muscle?

>>36250435
... we have a swim team?
I was under the impression that was just the guilds pool and hot tub.

>>36250426
Fryja ran off, is that new body your boys made for her going to hold up?

>>36250428
She'll likely be coming after Fryja did, to bring her under thrall once more.

>>36250435
Takes some time to fine-tune it is all.

>>36250428
You really ought to get your rest. Consider yourself lucky you're still Lawful Evil.
Well, I guess remaining evil isn't necessarily a good thing... but then, becoming good usually is a good thing...
hm. Ah well.
>>36250458
We just got one. Don't think there are actual swimmers yet, though.

>>36250412
I was sort of hoping for a long, thin monster stretching from caster to target.
>>36250426
Would It be possible to commission a homunculus of some sort, suitable for paperwork and other drudgery?

>>36250481
Or lots of little monsters, kind of like summon swarm.

Bastards, the lot of you! 5 times now you've rejected my application! Just cause I can't use "real magic" means I'm not good enough for the lot of you?

>>36250379
You do realise that our reptuation ad cackling madmen goes back thousands upon thousands of years to the founding of the guild? Do we really want to sacrifice culture for progress?

>>36250458
>>36250474
I daresay some of the more active hydromancy students would be ready and willing to join such a team and spearhead any championships - we dive almost every day, after all!

>>36250467
I hope so! I haven't been this young in half a century!

>>36250372
What if I am, Eldritch Knight? Going to stop me?

>>36250428
Unfortunately yes. I find summoning a spirit of phobia tends to get their blood pumping, but this usually causes the apprentices to try burning it, or piss all over the floor. Have you tried experimenting with using minor fae such as pixies to steal from them? The fuckers are usually harmless and are cruel enough to convince your average layabout to climb through all sorts of interesting places

>>36250517
Last I heard you were in, actually. shall I show you to your five offices?

>>36250458
honestly, I avoid using vat grown muscle when I can. Honestly, I find that natural grown muscle works better.

>>36250467
well, it depends where she ran off too.

>>36250481
well, I don't really make Homunculi, because that involves creating life from no life. I use already existing life to create new life. I could make you a simple flesh golem that can do those things, though you will have to provide the raw materials.

>>36250390
Oh, good, good. Hmm... I think I better get started doing my new job, the faculty should be in chaos after loosing its two best witches.

I'll be taking Fryia's letter with me unless anyone has a problem with that. No one? Good.

>>36250517
Head Artificer's call not ours, our Artifice department is rather large actually.

>>36250521
Good joke.

>>36250523
Simmer down Noel, i'm attempting to track her as we speak.

>>36250557
Afraid you'd say that.

>>36250563
*makes a Dismissive gesture to Quinn*

I'm heading to the orerry to track her down. Be back when I have a lock.

>>36250523
to be fair, yes. Look, none of you non-legal people do not understand priorities, and you non-evil ones do not understand that feelings are worthless. We need you here, and now. Not out there searching for the witch you fell for. What do you think, that she gave you her cloack so you could use it to fly to her rescue, or to better protect this guild?
Idiot.

>>36250517
Eilror, its probably just lost in the paperwork, go talk to the adminancers.

>>36250521
Your not taking the damn hot tub.

>>36250557
Eh, your just probably making it wrong, i have a few decent flesh crafter contacts who nothing but.
Like all things, the apprentice work and masters work is a entierly different thing.

Having said that, apprentice muscle growers never have the problem of it getting up and breaking out of the vat.

>>36250547
Oh for fuck's sake, it's that damn assistant of mine stealing my mail again. Well, I suppose at least I'll have no shortage of workshop space

>>36250518
Yes! There will always be others afraid of this, and this is not a bad thing. But to actively seek it out of spite is not only petty, but goes against what it means to be a wizard, in our perpetual thirst for knowledge. Now am I saying that we should stifle our experiments or ourselves? Absolutely not! But it's hard to make progress when the next generations keeps being turned into abominations.

>>36250595
My friend, who do you think fills the hot tub?

>>36250396
I FIRE THE CREATURE LIKE A LASER.

THE CREATURE USUALLY DOESN'T SURVIVE BUT ONCE SOMEONE'S BEEN HIT BY A RHINO LASER AND THEN COVERED IN ITS ENTRAILS ITS USUALLY PRETTY HORRIFIED AND INJURED ANYWAYS

>>36250594
........

>>36250616
Create water is a cantrip. Anyone i bully/ask into doing so.

Oh, and heating it is easy when what you do all day is make fire.

>>36250594
>you non-evil ones do not understand that feelings are worthless
Define "worthless". Because I have certainly found them to be detrimental.

>>36250595
Ah, well you see, that is the problem. I'm not a flesh crafter. I'm a flesh WARPER. huge difference. A lot harder actually, but the final products are a lot better, believe me.

>>36250557
I'm suprised actually. Creating life is easy enough that people will pay good money to better avoid it. I might have some spare flesh lying around, but it's all been dried to keep better on long trips.

>>36250586
I don't get you, she wanted to go away and does not want you to go after her so why you "oh we must respect others' opinion" guys are not going to accept her decision?
>>36250631
I don't hear you, Noel, is this the sound of your brain working?
She did. Not. Want. Am I the only want to understand? And besides I'm not letting you take that jheska-attracting beacon here again.

>>36250662
If Jheska gets to her first....... Imagine something bad happening then make it worse.
*steps into orerry chamber*

>>36250648
Oh yes i agree. Lot less fussing with souls and such, very fine work you do.

Having said that, i tend to bulk buy homs for implanted bombs.

>>36250662
I was unconscious when she left, so I have little to say in the matter. But if she wants to leave, so be it. As long as she fills out the Resignation forms for her position as Headmaster.

>>36250642
You do not enjoy the benefits of mineral-enriched water, my friend. We can fix that.

>>36250650
No no no. I need living flesh, like actual living beings. An apprentice and dog will work fine for what I usually make to handle paperwork.

>>36250690
Well of course using homonculi for implanted bombs is the smarter thing to do, since you obviously aren't planning to keep them around. My creations are made to last for quite a long time.

>>36250706
Yeah, by running it through rocks like everyone else. And then having it coat the inside of the damn kettle when your making a brew.

Listen lad, you are not winning this one.

>>36250662
Goddammit...

>>36250732
Apologies for wasting your time then. I'm not quite lazy enough to endager my brother's paladin candidacy just to better avoid paperwork.

>>36250683
Care to explain? Worst case scenario jheska ends up in fryia's body, doing all of jack shit after jack left town but NOT here, and this is what fryia wanted. We should look for jheska, not Fryia.
>>36250773
Want to put that rage to something useful? We need to track Jheska. If we find her before she find fryia, we win.

>>36250734
So you make water... and then run it through rocks... and then you transfer it to the hot tub.

Also, why do we have a hot tub? Surely the cooling pond for high-energy thaumatics would suffice.

>>36250795
You don't cast Fireball into the water? That's how I make hot water for my bath, actually...

>>36250706
Don't feel bad Cobb. All classical elements are considered first year level. But hey if you like to splash, I say splash!

>>36250781
good idea, because if you had told me later that this was for a paladin, I would be forced to recall my product and then charge you extra. I don't work for paladins.

>>36250795
Because while convenient, i like getting out of the hot tub with all four arms still attached and only two eyes as usual.

Not to mention what else happens when you mix thaumatic radiation water and spell tattoos and the like. Now that was a bad day.

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Hey guys, I found these odd looking fossils while on vacation in Otaria. I'm going to try reanimating them, bringing them back to living condition and whatnot.
Any idea what they are?

>>36250846
Looks like a waste of time to me.

>>36250789
Fine, maybe the rarely used divination powers of Pyromancy will be of use.

>>36250846
Who cares, they seem interesting anyway. Worst case we got me a new hellsteed so I say you try.

>>36250834
The homunculus was for myself. Paladins have enviably little paperwork.

>>36250846
I HEAVILY advise against it. It is legal, but a very poor idea.

>>36250827
That seems ludicrously inefficient.

>>36250831
You say this as if I don't have students myself. Of course, at higher levels, we go a little deeper and things become an awful lot more complicated.

>>36250838
Oh, bah. It dissipates completely relatively harmlessly! It's only the heat you have to worry about, and we haven't had any sort of reaction for days.

Though I think I remember the tattoos. If nothing else, that was entertaining.

>>36250846

Herbert I told you to stop messing around with reanimation! Its been thirty years; go and study something else!
Also, a fake moustache is not the greatest disguise.

>>36250881
What, there is something like that? And here I thought you were going to be useless again.
>>36250896
You give a bad name to all legal guys in the world, you know?

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>>36250896
>>36250883
>>36250867
Too late, it has already been done.

He looks kind of cute, actually.

>>36250846
What they are is clay. Reanimate them if you must, but you'll likely face a lawsuit from the golem forgers.

>>36250946
You don't understand, that is the remains of a sliver. Nastiest, deadliest race of beings I've ever se- >>36250960 oh dear. Someone get a Mass Revoke spell ready!

>>36250946
...You're not very bright, are you Cromina? OF COURSE PYROMANCY HAS DIVINATION POWERS!

>>36250960
Oh yeah, I remember those things. they were a bitch to kill and highly annoying. give it to me so that I may kill it before it multiplies.

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>>36250960
>>36250990
Shit. I can't deal with this, I'm going back to Miskatonic.

>>36250902
Like what? Bigger waves? But in all serious I genuinely would like to know, as my purview tends to be things such as shadow magic.

>>36251020
Scheisse! Not again!
>>36250976
Clay they are not, and growing fast they are.

>>36250960
>>36251020
You just had to make me bring the skeleton army out of the basement already, I just got them to stand in perfect formation.

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>>36249740
>>36249763
Oh for fuck's sake...with all due respect, fucking martyr complex is a big pet peeve of mine.

>>36250631
And you need to chill before you explode like some Territorial Oak or something.
Geez...I understand that things got fucked up, but that's certainly not cause to just wallow and shit! If you don't like how things, are, change it!

>>36250960
An acid bath should do the trick.

>>36250902
Depends on the experiment. Some of the higher end ones leak into the coolant as the particles hop teleport in. Its all very weird and has the boffins excited. They seem to think they've cracked the teleport particle or something.


Right then, i need to go off and get some alchemical golems made for an order i have. I will see you all next meeting.

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>>36251020
*ominous clicking noises*

>>36249395
I remember it used to be a fairly popular club sport where I'm from, using specifically nonlethal force spells for offense and an array of defensive or terrain altering spells. Good duelists were treated like rockstars at school, and usually accrued an array of honor-scars to show off like fencers did.

Got a scholarship for it before channeling spells through wooden swords was expressly banned by Royal edict. Can't remember when, though. It feels like it was so long ago now.

>>36251051
You know what Sam. You're right.


Sam, how do you feel about going on an adventure?

I purpose we destroy the local churches.

>>36251055
It's a bit late for that.
>>36251050
I mean sure, if you like the look of bones scattered about the guildhall...
>>36251070
What we do need are some board wipes. Before they develop a hivelord.

>>36251051
>>36251098
Its all fine and dandy to say "change it" but you also have to remember we're wizards and artificers.
Soooooo...no chronomagic or chronotech to change anything. We have enough shit hitting the fan as it is, dont want the pile growing bigger.

I do not see the Problem?
Why not start a Club for Camel Racing?

>>36251024
Without much research into the nature of abyssal pressure and thaumatic sinking, no-one in this guild - or on this continent - would have such a clear view of what lies towards the bottom of the very deepest trenches. And when I say "view", I mean that figuratively - the light from anything is sucked away down there, so an abyssal adept would have to "feel" their way around using Extended Aqueous Form.

That, and we developed Fontaine's High-Pressure Water Beam and Instant Flood. Lots of industrial and agricultural uses, those. Good profit for the guild over the years.

>>36251070
Erm. How best do we control these things? I could just wash the campus out.

>>36251020
Can we just kill this idiot before he does anything else stupid?

>>36251070
*gibs it with enchanted shillelagh*

>>36251046
Still pretty sure they're clay, sir. Magicked up rather nicely, but still clay. If they're bothering you, I could crack them open. Like clay.

>>36251115
I thought slivers had broodqueens? Since when did they have hivelords?

>>36251051
Apprentice, you know nothing. But, since she mentioned you among the people she allowed to sack her coffins, why don't you go and take a spellbook from there? And you would benefit also of a fucking INT-augmenting item.
>>36251098
D not. Heed my words, do not.
>>36251070
Fuck! Multiplying yet! Let's kill them before it is to late!

>>36251124
You have any relation to the previous head of Eastern Magics?

Excuse me from interrupting the meeting but whoever left the south-east-northern top basement divinationary graveyards alchemy lab in a pool of lava-
please clean up after yourself.

>>36251130
>>36251139
>>36251142
>>36251127
*ominous bubbling clicks*

>>36251155
Dang it, you got to give credit where it is due, when Jheska was around you won't see this kind of things *fireball at the janitor*
>>36251166
OH FUCK-
*starts flinging fireballs*

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>>36251166

Hey, I didn't allow anyone permission to bring back dead species!

>>36251155
Sorry, that was me, had a bit of an incident after the victory celebrations following last meeting. I'll get right on handling that, as soon as I see less then five of you... I can currently see eight so it shouldn't be long.

>>36251097
Perhaps we can get the paralegals to get that revoked, or at the very least have a third party inspect the enchantments to determine whether they're legal or not? If we were to do this we would could have a sport that would actually bring in potential cataphracts as well as reduce collateral damage caused by personal spats by quite a bit.

>>36251188
This is getting out of hand
>Greater Dispel
...
Scheisse, that Ward sliver is more troublesome than expected.

>>36251139
It would not suprise me if the terms were synonyms.
>>36251124
Camels get rather ill on this miserably damp continent.

>>36250846
Pets are not allowed in the inverted dining hall unless their owner feed them himself, even then kobolds are not allowed as they mark their territory everywhere they go, and you wouldn't want your food smelling lizardkin urine would you?

>>36251145
Former Head of Oriental Magik was killed by Fire, it seems.
He usually was talking about the Fire Whore. He say she was incarnation of evil flame Dhjinni. I take it she is you? You dress like he described.

I know not. He was old fool. He was iet man but too devout. He did not understand other cultures.

After His death (May He Rest In Peace) section was revamped into Far Central Eastern, Far South Eastern, Far North Eastern, Near East, Central East partitioned sections.

>>36251208
It was untruly brought back to life, wouldn't some kind of time reverse magic destroy it permanently?

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>>36251155
Ah Janitor! I brought you a present from my vacation.

*Hands the Janitor a box, inside is a hawaiian shirt*

>>36251238
Yeah, it's a bit late for pet warnings...
>>36251203
A bit late for that, as well.

>>36251188
>>36251208
That's alright, I've got the watery ones. Behold, as I unleash...

>Fontaine's Abyssal Pressure!

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>>36251241
*Chronosynchronous clicking*

>>36251240
As long as you don't start bitching about how we should cover ourselves up and call us whores, we'll be just fine.

Now, what kind of creatures do they have in the East? I've never really gotten a chance to travel that far.

>>36251241
You could try some chronomagic, but the results could be d....
>>36251286
Well, like that.

Alright, I've deduced that they chose protection from blue, seeing as neither my dispulsion nor the water magic has worked. Do we have any pyromancers in here?

>>36251251
AD, are you the one putting coins in the door hinges? If so then I am taking you down.

>>36251251
Help me out, Anfarthon, Noel and Sam are heading to find Fryia nonetheless.
>>36251286
*chain lighting*
And we got Slivers everywhere. Why can't a meeting be quiet and chilly, with me just drinking and getting laid at the end-sigh...

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Sorry I'm late - transit was experiencing delays.
Now, what did I miss?

>>36251240
Was my minidress, thigh highs, and knee boots really that scandalous?

>>36251127
So...bigger splashes? As for seeing in the dark there's two dozen different disciplines that could do so, and the needs of crops could just as easily -if not easier- be attended to by Druids.

Still I hear hydromancers get a nice pay in the Royal Navy, so there's always job security.

>>36251286
Well it looks like the time distortion is going to destroy many of you. It appears to be that the undead are unaffected by such manners.

>>36250789
Back Fryja's in Jheska's hand by the by. Knife eared bitch gave my a raspberry before warping out.

So what did I miss?

>>36251322
The Return of the Slivers.

>>36251326
Fryia would have to object. Still dead-set on going to help her, anyway? Do I have to knock you unconscious?

>>36251300
Snakes, camels, giant acid breathing wasps that build and defend mosques, the usual.
>>36251286
Die, Asymmetric spawn of what I still insist was clay!

>>36251322
SLIVERS. SLIVERS EVERYWHERE!
>>36251319
I'm trying, but they have pro-blue! I'm only secondary in white magic!
Untargetted removal! We need untargetted removal!

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>>36251122
I'm aware of the Three Laws, but that doesn't mean we have to accept this without doing anything!

>>36251142
Damn straight I know nothing. It may make me ignorant, but it also makes me objective. I don't have ties that would cloud my judgment, so I'm going to do what seems like the right thing, and you can stow it.

>>36251166
Faaaack. I'm no black mage but if someone can find a scroll of extinction I ought to be able to fake it!

>>36251357
Explain, I did not understand.
>>36251370
Ok. Fine, stand back. Out of this Hall at once.
Let's see how the handle a Damnation.

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>>36251384
>>36251370
>>36251364
>>36251319
*virulent clicking*

>>36251326
the kiddos mistook you for someone's pet succubus.

>>36251384
oh yeah, the reminds me, don't we have a stockpile of extinction scrolls in the demiplanar vault?

>>36251308
Surely they can't withstand abyssal pressure? It took the things down there millenia to get used to it. It's not even a water thing!

>>36251327
Bigger? What do you think we are, fire mages? No, better focused is the key. And there's more than dark to see through down there - the water is teeming with organisms, so it's as if you're attempting to look through rice pudding. And if you can find a farmer who'll hire a druid for a season rather than purchase a single-use spell for that duration, then be my guest.

Meanwhile, distractions. Getting out of the way now.

>>36251396
Alright, pray it works.
EVERYONE CLEAR OUT!

>>36251405
Surely this incidence is getting out of hand. I wish to purpose for this meeting that we shall move to another wing of the building that isn't infested!

>>36251319
>>36251358
>>36251370
Can someone just portal it into space already or should I?

>>36251396
I found Fryja, Jheska had her bound in some sort of spell. Jheska turned look at my scrying viewpoint, stuck out her tongue then warped away with Fryja.

>>36251405
Silvers again? <Mass Wraithfire>

>>36251300
You dress like whore, you get raped, is your problem.
I not care. I come here for study, for exchange, for learning and teaching.
Your culture, your values.

Near East? We have many camels, giant poisonous scorpions, and flying snakes. Also ghul's, cursed humans who died but were corrupted by demons.
Spirits like Dhijni are part of material world, they represent elements like Ocean, Sand, Rock, Flame.

What you want to know? I am from Near East, I do not know much from further East, like Central and the Far Easts.

>>36251326
To us Al-Maji from the Near East, it is so. You reveal much skin, much arousal in men.
You see, our folk hate-love women. We hate women that dress for everyone to see, because we want that woman to just reveal to us. They teach it is sin but they all love it when a woman does tease it all for all, it is just they think and know it is wrong in their mind. And since Western woman is dressed like that all time but not to invite sex all time, they build tension and stress.
Yet you must believe me, Old Master wanted to spend many nights with you.
When I look at you, I agree. You are most beautiful woman, you must know.

>>36251407
EXCUSE ME?!

>>36251384
>>36251370
>>36251364
>>36251361
>>36251358
Whoever let out the Bananas vermin please put them back in their cage.

>>36251358
>>36251370
Oh god, THOSE things again? Hang on, I think we have an enchantment for this SOMEWHERE...
>Begins rummaging through paperwork looking for the right storage area

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>>36251439
OK!
I HAVE NOT DONE THIS IN AGES DANG IT!
ANY DOUBT ON THE FACT I'M STILL EVIL?
FUCK YOU SLIVERS! DAMNATION!ù
>>36251452
How. what. when. FUCK.

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>>36251491
*self-aware cli-*

>>36251405
Please, let those bright colours be a warning about poison and not a mating display...

>>36251491
Now that the silvers have been...acquitted, I would recommend everyone bit to seek attention for the violent degeneration of the reproductive organs...

>>36251491
Hmmmmmm...
Fascinating..
*flips down darkened goggles*

>>36251471
Hey, I just act as the guild's spymaster. When you get hormonal teenagers who suddenly learn of sex demons they see them everywhere.

>>36251491
How: Jheska had the drop on her and Fryja with no self confidence to boost her spells is useless as hell, especially with no enchanted item support.
What I already told you
When: A few minutes ago as I was trying to get a lock on to go and get her.
Fuck: agreed.

>>36251508
Lets see how they deal with this. *starts a chant under his breath*

>>36251510
The difference between virile and virulent is an important one.
>>36251508
>>36251491
I-I think that has done it. You have done a great good this day Cromina! However, considering your already dilapidated state, this may be a good time to get some rest.

That is fascinating. I wonder if there'll be any of the aquatic one left for autopsy?

>>36251549
No need, Soros. They have been defeated. Cromina has acted in the interests of all despite her own state, a truly benevolent act!

>>36251471
To be fair, I thought the same thing the first time I saw you.

>>36251469
HA. me, raped? Son, let me tell you, anything trying to rape me is in for a bad time, because they will end up as my next experiment after I get my kicks. Now, Noel, on the other hand, I'm not so sure how well she would do.

But back to the point at hand, I am looking to get my hands on exotic species that I have not had a lot of chances of working with. I've seen a few from the east come back this way through trappers, but I need a more steady supply of live creatures. In particular, creatures that have supernatural or magical abilities, though you can leave out spirits and elementals. I don't really work with that kind of life.

>>36251469
Your former master called me Dhjinni with a name, As-something or other, too.

>>36251491
Well, never mind then.

Has anyone found/created any new enchantments that must be catalogued?

>>36251600
>exotic species
>supernatural abilities
Well, considering recent eve- no, we would do best to forget about these monstrosities entirely.

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>>36251491
>>36251508
...We good?

...I think we're good.
In any case Cromina, thanks. Least I can do, I guess.

>>36251607
That makes no sense, Dhjinni are spirits of the air, not fire. Ifreets are fire.

>>36251635
I learned all I could from Slivers a long time ago, and honestly they are too annoying for me, so I was glad to see them killed the first time.

>>36251595
Benevolent, my arse. I just happen to like the world as it is, full of injustice and fights, not of clicking sounds.
>>36251549
This is a bummer but it seems like she was right, it was too dangerous for us to have her stay here. What now?

>>36251595
Aiming for the source Anfarthon, so we don't have to deal with these again. <Grand Concordance of Annihilation> *color greys out for 2 seconds before returning back to normal.*

>>36251642
Unbelievable! I'm a respected member of this guild, what do they expect to do? Wear pants?!
>>36251600
I'd burn them.
Really, really badly.
>>36251642
Well he called me something. Man was he a total bastard to be around.

>>36251607
Still wnating to chase after her now that you know this >>36251549 ?

>>36251672
Perhaps the Council has not left you entirely unchanged. I'm not complaining.
>>36251675
Well, that takes care of these slivers. We'll need to find Werbert and discern where he found the fossil, to avoid future issues.

>>36251726
considering a lot of them live in the desert and deal with fire elementals on a regular basis, I'm not quite sure how effective that would be.

>>36251759
Drench them?

No, wait, that wouldn't help.

>>36251672
You know how I sometimes do something completely random and have to assure you it's part of a long reaching plan to improve things? Trust me when I say Fryja being in Jheska's clutches is very bad.

>>36251756
Please do so, that spell takes a toll. Anyone have any coffee?

>>36251726
Also, you could at least wear something that covers your crotch at least 75% of the time. I swear, every time you bend over or even move around slightly you flash everyone your camel toe

>>36251781
These are the times I miss Mortimer.

>>36251756
In a kiln? Because it was made of clay?
>>36251642
Many texts describe djinni as beings of smokeless fire. Haphazardly assigning classical elements to djinni is a modern trend. Ifrit are a type of djinn.

>>36251759
Infernal Fire to the dick would be unpleasant regardless.
>>36251747
What do you think?

>>36251814
Faizel, someone has deceived you. A clay sliver does not create more slivers, especially not flesh and blood ones.

>>36251798
and that's when you DO decide to wear underpants

>>36251756
One more word about that, and you are going to follow those slivers. Just to say.
>>36251836
That we don't need to do that. She will come for us.

>>36251726
...
As much as I want to go there, I won't. I will say that knee boots and thigh-highs seem like they'd work against each other. Maybe a capelet or something would have helped too?

>>36251814
>assigning classical elements to djinni is a modern trend.
Huh. Well, guess I leaned something today.

>>36251806
Indeed *pops a green fizzling potion open and start to slowly drink*

>>36251798
Lupa don't cast stone remember that time you went with that really skimpy dress for like twenty years. Everyone knew you didn't wear underwear then.

>>36251836
>>36251870
Waiting for Jheska to come back would be a mistake unless you like high body counts on the part of your allies.

>>36251781
Do we have a clean ibrik? I do brew coffee, but Mortimer is usually far better at it.

>>36251911
Then what, head out to fall in her obvious trap?

>>36251870
That was a rhetorical question you ninny! Of course I'm going.

>>36251911
At least I was perfectly aware of what I was doing and just didn't care. I'm sure Noel cares a lot more that we all know if she shaved recently.

>>36251756
Werbert, Herbert, or whatever hes using now is quite the character. He came to the guild thirty years, or so, ago to learn science magic. At the time I was investigating - for the seventh time - reanimation. He seemed like a good student and he didnt die...But he became obsessed with the reanimation research. I concluded it was a deadend, but he didnt want it to end.
After we found him reanimation so dead specimens we banished him from the guild.
You say the wards are damaged? Probably how he managed to get in...oh no, that means anyone we'be banished can return!

>>36251954
But, if we know it is a trap, is it *truly* trapping us?
I believe we need proactive measures, not reactive ones. We must find Jheska and stop er before any more crimes can be committed.

So to fund Antruthius portrait tapestry and vacation to the Fae we have make budget cuts, it wouldn't be so bad if we didn't need to start a new course for the sports students.

The botomline is that each staff member needs to take up 169,1 hours class a week.

When are we having a meeting to update the safety guidelines?

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>>36251798
My minidress covers the crotch!
>>36251880
You have much to learn Sam, Grade S thighhighs. Don't worry, I teach you all about the virtues of feminine fashion later.

>>36251954
I vote we kill Lolth. Should maybe draw her out. Fun group bonding activity either way.

>>36252026
Killing Lolth happens so often at this point that one more time will hardly come as a surprise to Jheska.
>>36252018
How indecent.

>>36251938
The last still has silver on it.

>>36251954
Need to find her first obviously, then we'll see.

>>36251965
Fair enough.

>>36251967
The battle with Jheska and Ashburn damaged them, we're laying them back down even now.

>>36251980
Exactly.

>>36251993
Your forgot to carry the one. Also you forgot our contracts with the kingdom.

>>36251999
Set a date for it.

>>36252026
We would but half of us can't even enter her plain for various reasons.

>>36252026
Then you are not going to accomplice anything. Lolth has probably cast her out centuries ago

>>36251880
Just because it is modern does not make it bad. The elemental substitution spell is hardly more than a century old.

That said. Smokeless fire is a whole lot more impressive than smokless water

>>36251999
There's a set of safety guidelines?

>>36251993
Oh don't worry about the sports students. Just make my class mandatory for all of them. They won't be a problem for long.

>>36252018
Actually, honey, it doesn't. It might have at some point, but your recent weight gain has made it ride up a lot more.

>>36252056
You dropped your nametag, Soros

>>36252048
You want indecent, you should've seen the things Ashburn made me wear for his get rich quick schemes.
Besides, I'd argue pants is even more indecent for girls.

>>36251993
Wait does that mean that a mk Xii Samsang enchanto-broom?