>>36959560
Antruthius? Did you hit the eggnog too hard too early? You do realize we have a limited supply of it right?

>>36959655
Well well my dear Soros, it's wizardmas you see,
And so I have planned, filled with infinite glee
A quest most grand, to bring wizardmas cheer!
I may have been fueled by eggnog and rum, and let's not forget the hot buttered beer!

>>36959695
You are the only person I know who rhymes coherently and creatively while drunk Antruthius. Please stays away from the Moist Sorceress tonight. We don't need another scandal.

>>36959560
Ugh, do we really have to bring up Jake'ness again this year? Can't we just get high and shit-faced and have some sort of orgy like we used to? Those were always fun.

>>36959761
Oh I wouldn't say I'll be staying away
It's up to you all where we shall journey this day,
But I digress, I'll wait for more guests to arrive
As far as numbers go, I hope at least five.
I may need to pull up a rhyming dictionary if I keep posting lol

Up in the rafters, drakes give pause
Out jumps good old Soros Claus
Down through the halls with lots of spells
All for aberrations, Flumphs and Grells.

Oh, ho ho! Who would've known? Oh, ho ho! Who wouldn't go?
Up in the rafters, click click click!
Down through the halls with cheap cantrips!

First comes the stockings of little Noel.
Oh, dear Soros fold them well.
Give her a totem that scours and scries
One with enchantments of Greater Disguise.

Oh, ho ho! Who would've known? Oh, ho ho! Who wouldn't go?
Up in the rafters, click click click!
Down through the halls with cheap cantrips!

Next comes the robes of dear Pierre
Long and black, so nice to wear.
Here is a staff and lots of tomes,
one to spy on all the wizard's homes.

Oh, ho ho! Who would've known? Oh, ho ho! Who wouldn't go?
Up in the rafters, click click click!
Down through the halls with cheap cantrips!

File: artist_Contrite christmas(...).jpg (285 KB, 680x645)

285 KB JPG

"Merry Chr--Wizardmas. "
"Hows everyone doing?"
"I just woke up after spending all of last night passed out under someones bed. Speaking of man he sure was loud."
"...That was less lewd than it sounded"

Why did no one tell me my nametag was smudged?

>>36959793
You really hit the hard stuff early this year didn't you?

>>36959805
Very Lyrical of you ma'am. Who are you again? I'd do a seeing but that'd be rude.

>>36959790
>>36959816
Lupa meet catgirl paladin, catgirl paladin meet Lupa. I believe you'll get a long splendidly.

>>36959790
>>36959805
>>36959816
Well I see more people have shown up to this meeting,
Merry wizardmas and of course seasons greetings,
Now as for our evening of fun, I've tallied the votes and the total is one!
All for an evening of drunken good times?
Hopefully the booze will fuel my sweet rhymes

File: Jason Nguyen -Balance.jpg (209 KB, 707x1131)

209 KB JPG

>>36959845
I am Niamal of Rosetide. Filling in as Head Lawmagus in Anfarthon's absence.

>>36959861
Whichever, I already sent him my "gift" for this year. So I'm set either way.

>>36959862
Why does know one tell me these things anymore? Well nice to might you Niamal, I am Soros. I hope you haven't heard too many rumors about me.

>>36959816
>>36959845
Oh, lovely. I would love to take a look at your internal organs, see if there's anything I want.

>>36959861
YEAH, FUCK JAKE'NESS. GET ME SOME ABSINTHE!

File: 7a3ed0d9be628121c5606c52a(...).jpg (806 KB, 709x985)

806 KB JPG

So whats everyone up to besides getting drunk and accidentally wandering under mistletoe?
>>36959893
No thanks. We are very possessive of ourselves.

>>36959893
I meant more about how you both are very liberal with your dress and sexual activity. Also how you both, make men very tired.

>>36959903
Trying to finish up my work so I can spend tomorrow wit who my girl. Also trying to keep everyone from torching the place in a drunken stupor.

>>36959884
>>36959893
Well, as no one else wants to vote,
All aboard, the holiday goat.
To the tavern, the moist sorceress!
I hear this time of year it is quite picturesque!
Follow me, follow me, come one and all!
Time to spread our cheer to other folks' halls!
Ah yes, the smell of fire and chestnuts fills up the air!
Why look in the corner, it's our friend Pierre!
Drinking alone and drowned in despair!
Why thats no way to spend the holidays,
Come now guild members, adventure awaits!
>shall we attempt to cheer up our friend?
>Or perhaps start drinking, later we'll make amends

>>36959862
Any news on the bloody name change yet? The League of Re-Animated are still on my case about this.

>>36959939
NOW THIS IS LEADERSHIP I CAN GET BEHIND!

>>36959884
No, not many. Anfarthon said in his report that you were one of the most law-abiding members of the guild. Then again, it's little a feat considering your peers.

>>36959903
This place is a nightmare of paperwork. I've been working with the Bureaucromancers to clear them up, streamline things. I'l be lucky to get an hour off for holiday, let alone 24.

>>36959954
Yes, actually. Necromancy is still verboten, but they have agreed to shorten it to "Unliving Studies".

>>36959939
Let's go talk to Pierre, if he's depressed there is either a good reason or an amusing story behind it. Perhaps both. Besides we'll need him to run interference for you when your drunk.

>>36959981
Alright then. Hope the rumors and reports were good.

>>36959939
We can cheer Pierre up and get shit-faced at the same time.

>>36959981
Thank you. At least the former professors will get off my arse about the "grand traditions of necromancy"

File: 1230059840221.jpg (93 KB, 636x900)

93 KB JPG

>>36959939
Cheer up friend-pal-buddy. Drunken revelry can wait.

>>36959997
Hopefully they've got more of the triple distilled absinthe. I have to drink something capable of bypassing the anti poison charm I have to constantly wear. Last time I insult the professor of necrotic venoms thats for sure.

>>36959560
Yes yes, Merry whatever.
Now leave us alone until next year.

Hey,guys.

MerryWizardmas!

Igotyouallsomefinecolumbiancoffeeandhoneycrustedcoffeestirrers.

Enjoy!

>>36959990
>>36959997
>>36960005
Well that's three votes and enough for me,
It's like herding cats,>>36959903 no offense mon cheri
Very well let us now begin,
Let's pick his braind, see what troubling and smothering his once manic grin!
Why, it seems something's gone missing, the presents of course!
It seems that old Krampus loaded it all on a horse,
Rode away as fast as he could,
We should catch him my friends, I do feel we should!

>>36960049
Dear God man. Calm down. You're going to need what I'm drinking to even approach tipsy

>>36960064

Boozetendstomakemetired,sir.

Thatsaid,anicearmarettoliquorisagreatadditive.

Youwouldn'tlikemewhenIamsleepy.

>>36960049
Do not be rude to Antruthius while he's tipsy, its a bad idea.

>>36960049
Thank you. Might want to lay off so you can sleep my friend.

>>36960058
Guess that's for me. Follow my lead guys and girls. *starts walking*

>>36960081
Ah yes, I'm familiar with what troubles your dreams,
Here my old friend, take these amphetamines!

>>36960058

Krampus?

Idatedhissisterbackintheday.

>>36960058
I can send a flying skeleton construct to catch him. Maybe that might slow him down.
>>36960081
We want some sleep tonight. If you're not drinking please stay out till at least 3 the next afternoon.

>>36960046
Alright. We'll see you in a week.
>>36960049
Lovely. I do hope that this place has a designated coffee-bringer, as per Guild regulations.

>>36960058
That foul old Krampus has made of with the gifts?
Well there's no time to wait then, let us be swift!
These rhymes are as infectious as the Holiday cheer,
so to all a good fight, and a magical new year!

>>36960100
Well, I can get behind drinking.

>>36960096

Muchappreciated,dearsir.

>>36960125
A.. week?
What time is i- No, ignore that, what month is it!?

>>36960129
I refer to the Caffeinomancer. You remember what happened last year when he discovered that a fire elemental could be turned into an energy drink.

>>36960100

Tut-tut,Iwillnotstopanyonefromdrinking,sir.

Besides,someoneneedstobethedesignatedcaster.

>>36960100
Hmmm, oh yes, that would slow him down!
With your help he surely can't leave the town!
>>36960088
Alright then dear Soros, you lead the way!
When we catch that Krampus there'll be hell to pay!
>>36960125
Oh my dear, I'm so glad to hear it!
Someone else can withstand my holiday spirit!
Well now my friends, you know what to do,
Question these townsfolk, see if they've got a clue!
Now where oh where oh where to begin?
The bard's college, the clerics, or this cozy inn?

File: 49329598e412b4dc74a524c6c(...).jpg (383 KB, 2000x646)

383 KB JPG

Onward to Murder Krampus.
Meow meow meow
Meow meow meow
Meow meow meow meow meow
*To the tune of jinglebells*

*Hic* weeeeeeeh! Merry *hic* wizardmash! Weeh!
> randomly casts fireball at the ceiling

>>36960145
Oh, he's here?
That explains that constant droning sound.
But seriously, I could use a drink or fifteen.
You people have no idea what kind of crap you have to deal with in my department.

>>36960144
December 24th

>>36960154
*Grabs a flying carpet to expedite the process*

>>36960156
Interesting rendition of the song.....

>>36960159
Cromina your drunk.............. stop casting magic.

>>36960159

>Directs the resulting flame into his coffee cup for added flavor

>>36960159
Ah Cromina, I'd say well met.
But this is an evening you're sure to forget.
For you see, it really can't be debated.
You're absolutely inebriated.

>>36960154
The clerics are sure to know of his lore
Perhaps what he wants, where he's been, or more!
I say we go to the Cleric's Guild with haste,
and turn that foul Krampus into Wizardmas paste!

>>36960154
Archwiz, you've been at the fiz,
tis not Soros, rather Niamal the wiz
I think that the inn is the best port of call
We can pick up Pierre, then to the bard college ball.

>>36960156

Ifyouseehissister,tellhertostopsendingmelewdphotosifyoucould.

>>36960186
What? We ish not drunk *hic* I-I-I' ll showh you Shorosss... Weeeeh! CHAIN LIGHTING!
>spins on herself and falls backward.

>>36960186
Fudgecookies, I need to schedule some time with a Chronomancer then, I fear my spells might be eating my timeunits.

Now where did i leave that ponykeg of beer...

>>36960206
Ill swap numbers with you. Seriously, you have no idea how many letches are liches in my apartment.
>>36960213
What are you drinking, I want some!

File: artist_ christmas mithra (...).jpg (251 KB, 600x685)

251 KB JPG

>>36960186
Meow Meow Meow
flying through the sky
Meow Meow Meow
On a magic carpet
Meow Meow Meow Meow
O'er the fields we go
Meow Meow Meow
Drinking all the way
Meow meow meow
meow meow meow
meow meow meow meow

>>36960225
I will set a hellhound on you. Seriously, rhyme something other than meow.

>>36960235
That's kinda racist

>>36960202
>then to the bard college ball.
Yessha! The bard college!
>>36960224
Iiiit ish shome spidy spider thing I got in the *hic* underdark, have shome, here. Weeeh...

>>36960213
>>36960223
>>36960224
>>36960225
Why do I feel like the only person not busting into rhyme at this time. I do fear , I will be the only sober person here. The Krampus led me on a merry chase, bit in the end I tracked him to this place.
Gods damnit now I'm doing it too.

File: sample_74dfada00baf44d009(...).jpg (329 KB, 850x1524)

329 KB JPG

>>36960235
Purr purr purr
Mrowl Mrowl Mrowl
Hiss hiss hiss
Meow meow meow Meow
mewl mewl mewl
>>36960256
To be fair I'm not even rhyming I'm just repeating the same thing over and over. its easier!

>>36960225
Unleash the hounds!

>>36960235
I don't recommend Arthbrax, for you see
that would violate subsection 38.c.
>>36960256
He's here, you say? That saves some time!
Let's beat this beast with the power of rhyme!

>>36960202
Quiet you fool, I know my limit
Sixteen pints in and I know how to spit it!
>>36960196
>>36960202
Well now it seems a tiebreaker is needed,
If one more casts a vote it is sure to be heeded!
>>36960159
Cromina I say, you've joined us at last!
Please do be careful with those fireball blasts,
Their tavern is new, I'm sure you remember.
Let's see that it lasts past the end of December.

>>36960246
I have no problem with her race. Just their lack of verbal dexterity.
>>36960272
Fuck it. I am not spending my evening arguing over rhyming animal noises. I have a Krampus to catch
>>36960256
Soros! Good to see you.
The krampus is here you say indeed!
Then HIHO after him, for presents he must cede.

In the spirit of giving, and because at the end of the day wizards and druids are playing different games with the same rules ( except for those namby pampy wood-worship pets who rely on those sissy woodland gods), I'll forward some of the mana output to your central repository. Cheers!

>>36960256
Good to hear that Shoros, you need to, to, to relax yourshelfffff. Let, let, let yourshelf go shometime. *HIC* we, we are way tooo much... too much... what is the word fer that? Like, like, fryia, she ish not showing up today, why ish she shooo angry ?

Merry Wizardmas everyone!

>>36960247
I speak to soon, we have our direction!
I can barely conceal my excited inflection!
To the bard's college festival, let us not tarry!
If that krampus escapes things will surely get hairy!

<Mass Teleport>
And that students is why you never upset a volcano god. Now go on. I'll expect a 10 page essay - wait a minute - this isn't the guild hall!
Well I never said I was a teleportation -
>>36960301
>>36960256
>>36960324
>>36960328
Anthruthius, Soros, Cromina, and James?
Well this has to be the most convenient botched teleport ever.

>>36960333
The bard's college? Oh boy, this will be quite a night.
Just need to make sure my chastity belt is on tight...

>>36960353
Good evening and Merry Wizardmas Ivan.

>>36960333
Everybody is rhyming, But I haven't got any clue how to do that. Maybe a bard can teach me!

>>36960353
Weeeeeh ferrus, we are gonna wreck the bard's hall*hic* come, come, come with ush! Celebrate! Merry wizardmashshshsh...

>>36960386
Rhyming is easy, my feline friend!
Just make sure your words sound the same at the end!

Oh my, oh yes, this shall suffice.
That blonde guy with dreadlocks, is that vanilla ice?
Oh who cares, back to our quest.
Interrogate the bards, find the krampus, let our wizardmas be blessed!
With a bounty of gifts of which we're undeserving,
But who cares, we're wizards! Our might is unnerving.
No krampus shall ever again interfere
With our mighty spectacle of holiday cheer!
Go now my friends, question these bards!
These lowly deadbeat foppish tryhards!

>>36960280
>>36960315
Down there. I'll make sure he wont escape.

>>36960353
Hello Ivan very nice cape.

>>36960328
Good day James

>>36960386
Your wordplay is very lame
I can't stop!

>>36960386
If I didn't know you, I would advise you against doing that, but considering your... "Appetite", I'm sure you will be fine.

>>36959560
Gents, I've noticed a mysterious new star in the sky, in the rough direction of some pokey desert kingdom.

Does anyone mind if I blow it up?

How....HIC....wuzzat? Whym I in the bards hall? Why is everyone rhyming?

*hic* Sorry about that, I think I drank too much Absinthe too quickly and blacked out for a while. Did I miss much?

>>36960415
Hey, wait wait wait wait, who ish you, where ish anfarthon, our lawmagush?
>>36960443
>>36960324
I'd like not to be ighnored, shorossh. Hic.

>>36960415
That would be easy, I can just meow after every sentence! Problem solved! ...Also I don't actually have any spirit for this holiday that's probably why I can't rhyme. Oh well. Back to hunting krampus. He stole the presents and I want to know if I made anyone like me enough to get me a present.
>>36960438
I can beat them up, Maybe they'll tell us something useful then.
>>36960443
>>36960447
I don't have any wordplay. And I don't feel like a lay! ... Nreh that was painful. I'm not going to try that again.
>>36960467
Krampus stole our presents. You should beat him up with me.

File: Tulpamancers - No sense o(...).jpg (29 KB, 500x306)

29 KB JPG

Rolled 3 (1d20)

Well, seeing that your merry little band will be off, let me lend you the aid of the Tulpa.
and bring back a postcard will ya?

>>36960471
Oh its fantastic, we're having such fun!
We've crashed the bard's ball, and stolen their rum!
Questioning passerby, within and without
Where could the Krampus be, we know he's about!

>>36960466
Do that!*hic*weeeh!
>>36960467
Pierre, pierre! Stars gonna esplodeý! Have some of thish!
>forces pierre to drink from a suspiciously looking bottle

>>36960333
Bard's College? Sounds good.
No, no. Class, go back to the guild hall. I'm being pretty merciful with ten pages.
>>36960364
I might be able to help with that. I can make it electrocute anyone who doesn't have your permission to touch it.
>>36960370
And a Merry Wizardmas to you as well James!
>>36960393
Of course!
>>36960443
Ah, thank you Soros. I got it from a volcano god. Nice fellow. I think he spooked my students a bit though....
It seems to be melting the floor though. I'll put the cape away for now.

>>36960438
The bards will surely respect our verse.
But of their advances I expect the worst.
So while we quell holiday insurrection
I'd better make sure I bring protection.
>>36960473
Anfarthon's gone on a quest of self-discovery.
So until he returns it seems I'll be covering.
>>36960466
I advise against it, it's quite illegal.
Besides that, it's not very regal.
>>36960471
>>36960467
Is everyone already drunk off their asses?
How will you prepare for next week's classes?!

>>36960498
Wuzzinthat? Gimme.
>Chugs half of it
Fheroth ilureh shastan yrufindosk leyan irukoneth?

>>36960443
Good evening Soros.
>>36960467
Some combination of holiday cheer and excessive amounts of alcohol.

>>36960507
Oh, I'm shorry. I, I, I liked good old anfarthon, shure, he wash a goody two, two, tw shoesh but I 'll missh him. Shigh...hic.

>>36960507
We could still destroy it, have you no fears
Ignore any legal resistance
No one will notice it's gone for a few thousand years
Thanks to astronomical distance.

>>36960497
*Hic* Krampus you say? That cloven-hoofed bastard visits me every year and tries to punish me for being 'naughty'. *Hic* And every year I chase him off with his tail between his legs.

>>36960507
Ah *hic*, I teach better when I'm drunk.

>>36960507
I already have plans for the next seven decades. I suspect Soros will have me beat by approximately... 248 years.
>>36960517
Pass me some of that, Pierre. I've been watching apprentices for the past week. I haven't done anything irresponsible in an entire WEEK. I need this.
>>36960534
He's on leave, not dead. Cromina.

>>36960517
Ish it good, isn't it? Thish is a mark of, of, of quality, only after shome very fine booze you shtart speaking the rongue of the old onesh! *hic*

>>36960541
Well then I say you'll be of great help!
He's stolen the gifts, even the owlbear whelp!
And I can say, without much hard thinking
That he is the cause of Pierre's holiday drinking!
So tell me now, what have you all found?
We know the krampus is here, and still on the ground
Fleeing Arthbrax's necromantic constructs,
We know he can't fly, and in the township he's stuck!

>>36960584
Sounds like hes shit out of luck.

File: qb2.gif (1 MB, 500x283)

1 MB GIF

My rhyming skills are lacking, but I won't stay in the guild hall slacking. So instead I'll join your jolly merry band, even if I'm unable to lend a "hand".

>>36960596
Ah that's the spirit, you're getting much better
Your rhyming is fitting, down to the letter!
>>36960610
You're welcome to join us, come on it's good fun!
We've got that Krampus now, he's on the run!

>>36960541
>Ah *hic*, I teach better when I'm drunk
Don't we all, lassh, don't we all?
>>36960558
Yash, shame thing, ten grands he ish not gonna show himself anymore... hic.. poor poor sod...

>>36960610
...*Hic* What the fuck ish thish thing?

>>36960610
There once was a mage, name of Bradley
Who wanted to rhyme oh so badly
Quin practiced for days
With word, clause and phrase
But still couldn't crack it, quite sadly.

>>36960610
Lawmagus Niamal is what you can call me.
Glad to meet you, Professor QB.

>>36960625
Quin got herself *HIC* transformed.
>>36960558
It's Cromina's, ask her
>>36960581
Definitely good, good thing the tongues doesn't last.
>>36960584
One of the bards saw him making a break for the flying carpet emporium

>>36960625
Hic. Quin. Ishn't she cute, iI wanna hug her and cuddle!>
>36960610
weeeeh quin, let me hug you! But wait, I thought shoros and the othersh made a new body for ya.

File: qb.gif (667 KB, 499x277)

667 KB GIF

>>36960625
Of two departments I am the head, and most recently I made that mean Jheska dead. My research has recently have left me transformed, but it seems perhaps you wasn't informed.

Ok I think I broke my rhyming meter.

>>36960473
Apologies Cromina, still drunk offyour ass I see.

>>36960481
That wordplay made me flinch. please refrain from it further.

>>36960467
Hi Pierre.

>>36960502
Alright then.

>>36960507
I'm still sober.

>>36960610
Hello Quin

>>36960596
Better

>>36960625
it's Quin

>>36960677
Still working on it. just got her brain back into the right frame.

>>36960686
...I really want to shtab you in your shtupid looking fashe...

>>36960702
Well, she is indestructible and mauled and ate Jheska.
>>36960693
Sobered up a bit, Twitch gave me some coffee. Let's all get that fucking Krampus.

>>36960686
Did, did, did not fryia take the witchcraft one back? I heard you have been a naughty, hic, naughty girl and made her angry, hic.

>>36960725
I placed a halo of light over his head. Knock yourself out.

>>36960702
No need to be mean Lupa, She's still herself you'll get along...... supa

Gods dammit again.

>>36960610
Ah...you're still a cat...thing, Quin. I thought that would have been temporary. I could help reverse it if you wish?
>>36960622
I doubt it. He's a tough one to get rid of.
>>36960652
Let's not call her that. Please.
>>36960655
Ah. Alright.
Cromina! Mind if I drink this?
>>36960693
It's literally made of lava. If I hadn't dealt with compressed insanity, I wouldn't dream of wearing this. It's quite cozy though.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

I-IT SEEMS MY STUDENTS HAVE S-STOLEN ALL OF MY EGGNOG. DON'T MIND ME, I'LL JUST REFILL UP H-HERE.

*hic*

File: qb2.jpg (70 KB, 1280x720)

70 KB JPG

>>36960652
Hello Nimal, I'm Quin Bradley.
>>36960637
I rhyme poorly, I admit sadly.
>>36960677
If you wish then hug you may.
>>36960693
Hello Soros, let's be on our way.

>>36960738
>Cromina! Mind if I drink this?
Who caresh! It ish a gift from one of my, my ex boyfriends. Hic. I killed him, hic. But he wash sho nice not to be mad at me for that. Have shome, ivan!

>>36960738
A cloak made of Vulcan insanity? From anyone else it'd be an inanity.

>>36960748
Indeed let us go, for the road is dark and filled with snow.

Ho ho my wizards, my colleagues, my friends!
It seems that that Krampus shall soon meet his end!
We've got him now, after a most merry chase
Without further ado, let's fuck up his face!
Fireballs, curses, incantations galore!
Worst of all here is this disease ridden whore!

>>36960782
For he love of, of, of ashmodeush, enough with your rhymes and sit down. Hic. I wanna tell ya a shecret.

>>36960787
Indeed you go make him dance! While you do so while I take the chance, to take back the gifts he stole, so our Wizardsmas will again be whole.

>>36960799
I am sorry you dislike my wit. But I sit here now so spill it.

>>36960787
YEAH, SHICK HIM FLUFFY!*Hic*

>>36960748
Leaving already Quin? You haven't even punched a bard yet.
>>36960782
Soros, no. No to the rhymes, and no to the insane lava. The cape is mostly regular lava. The compressed insanity was...something else.
>>36960764
Don't mind if I do.
>takes a significant gulp
Hm not bad. I was kind of hoping for the crazy language but -
>disappears for an instant
Okay putting the bottle down...

>>36960787
I'd usually refrain from such illegal moves.
But if the Archwizard ordains it, I'll do so too!

>>36960827
Ok, now, hic, hear me out shorosh, it ish a shecret I am ashamed of. I, i, i have not a shingle level in wizard. Hic. In fact, my INT shcore ish 14. I am a shpontaneush sgpellcasshter bitch, a warlock. Hic. I am no better than, than, than a fucking bard. Hic.

>>36960842
Alright then fair enough, Wearing that cape must be quite tough. If the insanity needs to be compressed, what does it have to do with your dress?

>>36960872
Noel is warlock as well tis true, This known secret does not make me think less of you.

>>36960872
We all were aware of your true class alignment.
Warlocks in this guild is no odd consignment.

>>36960787
>>36960827
Make him dance? That's a great idea!
<Nerve Control: DANCE>
>releases a torrent of lightning
Okay nevermind. No dancing. Maybe just some small patterned movements?
<Nerve Control: Baby Steps>
>a pillar of searing light emerges from Krampus's former location
I'll just sit over here for now.

>>36960842

WHAT? WHAT IS HAPPENING?

>>36960872
*hic*
WHORELOCK? WHAT?
*hic*

>>36960885
But, but, shpontaneush shpells, hey make me feel dorty in, in, inside, hic. My, my powers only come from an otherwordly, hic, devil, shoros, I am just a naughty bitch. Hic. A filthy naughty bitch. Don't you want to shee how much, hic, of a bitch I am?
>starts clinging to soros

>>36960872
Well, it's the Mages Guild, not the Wizards guild after all.
Hell, I would probably not have learned magic at all if I didn't have the Red Shadow.

>>36960928

OH GOD I'VE L-LHOST MY NAME!

File: qb.jpg (65 KB, 1280x720)

65 KB JPG

>>36960702
I would almost like you to try if it wasn't such a pain, for I doubt your stabbings would see me slain.
>>36960738
While the limits and troubles of this body seem inconvenient, I find that its perks make them quite light and lenient. So I'm in no hurry to once more change, even if I now look quite strange.
>>36960842
No I'm not leaving, let us find us that bard. After all with all of us that should not be very hard.

Ha ha, oh yes, oh dear what a sight!
I doubt that foul Krampus will forget this night!
Bight marks and bruises,
Unpleasant contusions!
How will he go on living!
I had this whore give him the gift that keeps giving!
Now back to the guild with distraction,
It's on to the gifts, the main attraction!
Niamal, firstly for you,
Here are these scales, symblizing justice so true
Soros it seems there is something herein,
It will suppress chaos both from without and within
Lupa come quick, what's this that I've found!
Venomous creatures from far below ground!
Oh look it seems that here's one for Quin!
A new set of pajamas, replacing your old ones that were wearing thin.
Here's one for Cromina, with a note that's from Mort!
"Pierre said you would like things of this sort!"
Lord James, oh you of Red Shadows
The implements needed for a fine macchiato
Ah look, here's this for Pierre,
I'm...not sure what this is, but oh well, have fun I don't care!
There's more as well for those who aren't here,
We'll save them for later, after more beer

>>36960936
Cromina please, would you control your urges?
After all of that liquor, you're looking rather turgid.
>>36960946
Herr Hearsch you really must calm down.
You seem to have had quite a night on the town.

>>36960936
Cromina, while I do appreciate what you're trying to do, I have a girlfriend and you have Mortimer.

>>36960989
Much obliged Antruthius Thank you for this gift
I am quite glad the resolution to this matter was quite swift.

>>36960936
You know we are technically a college of magic, right? You could always learn to cast without relying on -
>an explosion can be heard in the distance
Okay that didn't work. Er. Back to what I was saying, you can learn to cast without relying on others' powers.
>>36960956
Well... I seemed to have vaporized him. Not that there was much left after what the Archwizard did to him.

>>36960989
Oh Antruthius, this is quite a surprise!
To be given such gifts when I've just arrived!
In my office I'll keep these scales on display
What a wonderful eve, and a lovely holiday!

>>36961020
I am so fucking done rhyming

>>36960946
Relax, my dear Hersch
There's no need to scoff
You bumped into a table
and your name tag fell off.

>>36961062
At least you can, Its too hard for me.

>>36961056
She was hitting on me Ivan.

>>36961062
Fair enough I'll still pop a good one if it comes to mind.

>>36960989
Ohhh, pajams! Hic! It, it, it barely covers my nipples, hic, it ish perfect!
>>36961020
Mhh, what is with your cold reaction, shoros? I tought you, you, liked me, and would like to see shome of my more, ah, chaotic shide, mhhh, yesh. Morrimer hash nothing to do with thish...

>>36961079
Oh sweet, sweet irony
Is that not just fine
I slipped for a moment
and then I lost mine

>>36961062
[spoilers] I can't rhyme for crap

>>36960992

YOU ARE....ARE QUITE RIGHT. HAVE I BEEN YELLING? I DID NOT NOTICE.
*hic*

>>36961079
*Hearsch attempts to compose himself by downing a shot of whiskey*

>>36961089
Feel free, I just can't do it anymore.
>>36961110
I had to rhyme shadow with macchiato, that should tell you how tapped out I am lol

gods dammit I always add on an s
>>36961129
I was impressed by that quite a bit

>>36961129
>>36961089
>>36961084
>>36961062
Such a shame you've given up so soon,
I can keep going all afternoon!

>>36961056
No, I, I, am not well vershed when it comesh to magic, hic. Without the pact I could not, not, not even casht a cantrip, hic!

>>36961129
I understand. You did pretty damn well though.
>>36961158
Showoff.

>>36961103
Cr-Cromina, I do like you but n-not in that way, even if you outfit is rather........showy.
*gods damn it I did not see this coming!*

File: Buddy-the-elf[1].jpg (104 KB, 394x411)

104 KB JPG

>>36961020
>Falls down from the rafters dressed like an elf with an envelop in hand
"Ow. Oh hey present from the thieves guild Mr.Soros. Merry Christmas!"

>>36961062
at least you can, I've spent the past 30 trying to think up a good one.

>>36961158
I've begun thinking in rhyme, it's gone too far

>>36961164
Don't worry to much over it Cromina, before I got the shadow, all I could do was bash things with a sword.

File: qb9.jpg (31 KB, 1280x720)

31 KB JPG

>>36960732
Last I heard no one had managed to escape her wrath, now excuse me while I take a bath. As for the matter of if she or I am the head, I've not seen yet her leave the room where she keeps her bed.
>>36960989
The pyjamas that will fit is a wondrous thing, and if I wasn't done rhyming I would probably sing.
>>36961062
Agreed, we had fun but we can't keep this up forever.

>>36961158
I'm still going without yawning, yet it's half-one in the morning.

>>36961089
She was? Romantic subtext isn't my forte. I guess I got a little distracted by my spells
>a storm erupts over the bard's college
being swapped out for pure devastation. Also we may want to get out of the snow now.
>>36961158
Get out of here with your lawmagi rhyming wizardry. No don't. I like it. Jealous really.

>>36961192
*quickly grabs gift and opens it uncaring what could be inside, just wishing for a distraction*

>>36961192
You look creepy in that outfit.

I'm sad, No present for me under the tree? I haven't been that bad.

So are you all done with your rhyming? I would have joined you earlier but I felt I would probably ruin the mood you were all in.

>>36961217
>points finger at the gift, it explodes
Well dang. I'm kind of glad that worked.
That person said Christmas, Soros. Not Wizardmas.

>>36961243
I could comfortably keep rhyming
And be healthy and hearty
Though considering my timing
I was somewhat late to the party.

File: Noone_for_ants.jpg (13 KB, 156x200)

13 KB JPG

>>36961217
>It's the items that you reported missing along with the shrunken head of Dr.Stabby

>>36961233
HMP!

>>36961191
Mhhh, yesh, and? Maybe you do prefer the catgirl whore, hic, you are such, such a pervert, but don't worry, hic, I will do my, my besht, meow...
>moar clinging

>>36961213
Please thundercaller, fix your meteorology
I don't care myself, but it's a matter of deontology.
>>36961243
Finished with rhymes? What a horrid thought!
All these wonderful jests would be for naught!

>>36961289
*Immediately bursts out laughing*
"Never mind, I got a present!"

>>36961304
"....Are you okay?"

>>36961274
>>36961304
Well as long as you don't expect me to join in on the rhyming, by all means continue.

>>36961276
Well this is n->>36961267 BOOM! Ow. *falls over*

>>36961289
OW! please get off so I can heal myself. ALso the paladin girl ahs no interest for me. One of the goddesses of her species however is in a relationship with me.

>>36961330
Please help me.

>>36961357
I'm sure my rhymes must be odd to hear.
But I'm simply filled with holiday cheer!
...
These masterful phrases, this impeccable timing!
Someone help me, I can't stop fucking rhyming!

>>36961276
Well... I'm glad those items suddenly appeared out of the range of that explosion...
I'd say I need a drink, but that's how this started.
>>36961304
I wish I could, Lawmagus, but I suspect any attempts at that will only result in a larger storm. Or explosions.
>>36961366
Apologies, Soros. Here
>holds out a hand
>snow starts falling harder
...
This is really inconvenient.

>>36961366
Oh I don't know, I think she wants to give you a present. Should I interfere? Meow.

File: NW+Jew[1].jpg (18 KB, 490x404)

18 KB JPG

>>36961267
"w-w-why would you do such a thing!"

>>36961381
"You should probably see a doctor but I think you caught a bug."

>>36961364
Well let it be said you're a good sport, at least
You'd be the life of the party, if you weren't

well...

deceased.

>>36961382
.................Not helpful

>>36961386
In Minyana's name please do!

>>36961381
I'd help but Cromina is making me indisposed. (why didn't I prepare a strength spell today?)

>>36961413
I suppose I should help you.
>>36961289
Hey Cromina, Why don't you let me help you out, Come here and put these fake ears on and this tail and I'm sure they will have a change of heart!

>>36961413
>>36961401
I wish I could cease, but the rhymes keep coming!
And without surcease, my inhibitions are numbing!

>>36961381
I knew this day would come, a rhyme duel for the ages,
Watch closely everyone as I stomp this law magus!
SOMEONE DROP ME A FUCKING BEAT

>>36961381
I don't think me helping is this best idea right now.
Unless you want the rhymes beaten out of you.
>>36961401
Instincts, mostly. Also, my magic is bust. It's not this volatile normally.
>>36961413
Besides the snow
>gestures to the sky, causing freezing rain to fall as well
Errrr...I was trying to help you up.

>>36961453
Bum-CH BADUMDUM-CH

(Repeat ad nauseam)

>>36961453
>Pulls a beat from his sack and drops it

>>36961444
...................

>>36961449
As soon as I can heal myself and get up to cast, I'll help.

>>36961462
A physical hand can work as well as magic Ivan.

>>36961453
You've lost already Pierre, for you see
the sound of 's' after 'u' is not 's' after 'e'!

File: valantine_qb_by_selgadis-(...).jpg (83 KB, 700x653)

83 KB JPG

>>36961413
Don't worry Soros, I think I can distract her.
>>36961289
So Cromina, I'm guessing I'm spared your hugs today then?

>>36961462
"You ruined Christmas!"

>>36961494
Thank you! (please let this work, I can't hold out much longer)

>>36961484
*Mumbling* And then you can get a safe distance away...

>>36961485
Grammar aside, Pierre should admit defeat
Because that rhyme right there was pretty damn sweet.

>>36961484
If you need a hand, take this one.
>Grinningly holds out the arm of some random skeleton

>>36961366
Oh, I get it, hic, you, you push me ashide becaushe I am a shpontaneush cashter, hic! Yes, it is true, it ish fucking true, I, hic, I shold my soul for pershonal gain and as such what ish wrong with me shellig my body? Hic! I am a soul selling whore, hic, a whorelock, yesh, it is true, go on and, hic, mock me as such, who cares if I am not a, hic, good wizard girl. Iti s not like,hic, shome one will ever like, hic, me either way. Hic.

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz.....

>>36961485
>>36961513
"Oh boy, it's spreading!"
>Equips gasmask

Here is your coffee everyone... what's happening?

>>36961465
Oh...this will do....
>>36961449
Five hundred years I've been perfecting my flow, you know who I am I fucking run this show!
Living in the darkness while I'm cutting deals with Marcus,
Got my hands in it all, making kingdoms fall
Knighting knaves moonlighting as the one who runs all of these games
Of thrones, built from the bones of kings,
The kingpin, the one whose running it all,
You're proud of your rhymes but you know what's before a fall
That's right I'm a lyrical monstrosity
Born of secrecy and a champion of verbosity
Face it lady your lyrics are crimes,
You adopted the rythm, but I Live in the rhyme!

>>36961535
Ah thank you Mortimer. You might want to get Cromina off Soros.

>>36961535
No spiking today, Everyone is shitfaced, Cromina is molesting Soros, Someone wanted you earlier. Christmas was ruined, saved, ruined, and saved again. And i bet it'll happen a few more times to.
I tried to save soros by offering a outfit to Cromina but they seem to not notice me anymore.

>>36961516
Really? *is not amused*

>>36961519
If I wasn't in a relationship already i'd go for it Cromina, but my word is my bond, and I am trying to stay true to it.

>>36961524
WAKE UP!

>>36961535
GET CROMINA OFF ME! She's horny and drunk and moderately depressed, get your girl and help her out.

>>36961484
Well, my hands seems to cause weather to intensify... and I don't think trying a magical hand is the best idea.
>>36961503
You mean Wizardmas? And this isn't really all that bad by Wizardmas standards...
>folds arms
>Winds start speeding up
I should really stop...
>>36961508
Could you just teleport out? Have we tried that? That sounds entirely too reasonable, doesn't it?
>>36961535
Rhymes. Rhymes are happening.

Speaking of presents, I have a present for each guild member back at my village. Even miss paladin.

[I call upon the power of the Red Shadow! Manifest my will and connect the world! Shadow Override: Black Gate!]
*the shadow stretches in front of James and becomes a large circle*

This gate will take us to my village's center.

>>36961551
What?
>>36961553
Ok, time to facepalm *facepalm*
>>36961555
Cromina, down!

>>36961550
Word.

Et cetera

>>36961485

Oh snap!

>>36961519
Whorelock?...Oh my, uh...present time everyone!

>>36961535
Ah Morty, just on time. A cup of coffee should...well, should do good.

>>36961580
"Mortimer, I have a present for you as well, It's from Stabby. "

>>36961555
>>36961580
You, you, you don't understhand my feelingssh!>>36961519

>>36961550
fucking slowclap man

>>36961566
Why do think I took the carpet instead of porting? My displacement spells need me to have both hand free.

>>36961580
*still struggling* HELP!

>>36961550
*Stops for a second* Nice, now help!

>>36961550
You're a spinner of secrets and lover of lies
bu your terrible rhymes betray your disguise!
Give up now, and I'll accept your surrender
but try to dodge the law and you'll see my game-ender!
I'm the head lawmagus, I keep things in control
and if you try to rap against me, you'll have to pay the toll!
You can't face the heat, I've got you on the retreat!
You may be a cheat but you'd best prepare for defeat!
Oh your little rap is neat but I'll have you on the street,
knocking you out with these unstoppable beats!

Sorry,Ihadtostepoutandgetadelightfulcontainerofeggnogflavoredcreamformycoffee.

Although,Imightpartakeofsomespiritsafterall.

>>36961640
Straight up G-talk, and all that.

>>36961612
Here
>>36961553
So who wanted me?
>>36961618
*puts on fireproof smock*
>>36961630
Cromina, just let him go. It's Soros for Pete's sake
>>36961633
Working on it

>>36961550
>hands Conspierre a mike

>>36961555
WHA-HUH!? oh, shorry, guess I fell asleep... Wait a second... Who took my bra and panties?

>>36961650
>>36961630
I cant Bre-e-e-e-eathe! *starts asphyxiating*

>>36961633
Sorry, I think she'll try to kill me If I do anything more than try to trick her with outfits. And then I have to fight her, And there's this whole big thing and its just not worth the effort.
>>36961650
Well not you specifically Something about a designated guild coffee bringer. Niamal I think was their name. Probably just too lazy to get their own cup.

*drinks some shots of peppermint schnapps*

>>36961669
My word
>>36961673
Ok, thanks for telling me

>>36961650

While you're here, I have this here present for you.

*hands Mortimer a Not!Coffeemaker shaped box*

>>36961654
>>36961673
>>36961691
H-h-h-help me!

>>36961669
>>36961705
Alright, that's quite enough of that.
>Starts to try and pry Soros free.
>>36961630
Cromina, please let go of Soros, living friends as old as him are hard to come by.

>>36961650
>>36961633
Uff. Fine, hic. Cromia, let him go, cromia, shtop moleshting me, cromia, stop being sho cold and rude, none ever hash a good word for me, hic. Bunch of pricksh, hic, you don' even call me by name,hic. Fine, who carss if the whorelock ish sad, she ish evil and stuff and dosh not prepare her shpells in da morning. Hic.

>>36961705
I mean really, you should have seen this coming.

>>36961640
Oh, wow. That's - no focus.
>>36961669
Okay, suffocating Soros. That sounds like a recipe for disaster.

This is a terrible idea.
>takes a swig from Cromina's drink

Ah, peppermint schnapps, my old friend.
Been apart so long, I thought our time was at an end.
The crisp mint taste and the fine slow burn
Sadly it does make my gut start to churn.

A small price to pay for a lovely drink,
It frees my mind and allows me to think.

I propose we drink in cheer!
After all, Wizardmas comes but once a year!

>>36961698
Oh, thank you. I have a present for you to.
*hands him a Not!microspope shaped box*
>>36961705
Suck it up you wuss
>>36961714
Hey, calm down. look, I got you a present.
>>36961732
Nice

*hands Cromina a large box*

>>36961714
>>36961711
Thank you! *gasp for air* You forget your strength and my fragility Cromina. You a good friend but damn are you strong.

>>36961716
Yes I should have, but I didn't.

>>36961717
Well fuck.

>>36961691
Mortimer Cheer Cromina up please.

>>36961714
Hey I don't have anything nice to say to you because you were incredibly hostile towards me in all instances of contact. You could try to act nicer to people!

>>36961705
Sorry, can't move too much, otherwise these puppies are just going to be bouncing all over, and that is extremely uncomfortable. Now, will who ever stole my bra and panties please give them back? It's too cold to be going commando.

>>36961747
Don't badger her right now! She is drunk.

>>36961640
Well look who's awake and decided to play
Damn right I cheat, you know I'm in it to win,
You better send your lyrics to your next of kin
Why? Cause I'm killin it
How? with my villanous
Schemes bringing down all that you love,
I'll make sure that your end fits just like a glove
I'll fill it up with irony,
Top it off with calumny,
Face it now Niamal,
your rhymes ain't fit for these halls.
My ill beats are filled with sinister inflection
Igniting numerous all out insurrections
Your career's dead, beyond all hope of resurrection
>drops mic

>>36961714
Cromina, don't go saying things you'll regret.
It may be these rhymes, but I care for you yet!

>>36961714

Sounds like someone needs a hug.

>>36961792
And you are?

>>36961747
Paladorks are not peeeople. Hic.
>>36961743
Meh, who, who, who caresh *sniff* no one likes me! Evil cromia, bad cromia, you a naughty bitch, always thinking abot sex. I bet your gift a witty sexual pun, let's make fun of cromia, she casts with CHA, she ish dumb as a stone *sob*

Alas my friends, I must say to you,
A fond farewell and sweet adieu;
Though drunken antics are fun, it's said,
It's like 2-fucking-am, I'm going to bed.

And so to mages venerable and apprentices bright,
Merry wizardmas to all, and to all a good night.

>>36961757
Fat lot of help you were. *heals self*

>>36961819
Cromina I like you as a friend, if neither of us were in a committed relationship, I'd take the chance. But we are, so I won't. You are not stupid, or slutty(by guild standards at least) Buck up!

>>36961812
She's Anfarthon's replacement.

>>36961820
Good night Dr.Biscuitbarrel

>>36961819
Hey, I like you a whole lot. You are one of the few people in this guild who I can legimently related to.
>>36961837
Oh

The amount of exposed flesh and hostile women,
The language being tossed around, is rash for a seaman.

Can we not have a pleasant evening of cheer?
Let's bury the hatchet and all drink a beer.

>>36961650
>Hands Mort a wooden box with stabby's favorite dagger inside along with a card that reads
Dear Mortimer, stabupuncture was a load of baloney. Just make sure you use this dagger of ridiculous mending and you'll be able to heal anything. Merry (winterholiday name).

P.S. Don't be an idiot, ask Cromina out before someone else does.
P.P.S. if it's not to much trouble get me a reincarnation.
P.P.P.S. Punch Noone.

>>36961819
Paladorks?
>barely holds back a laugh
Paladorks? Heh, I got to remember that one.

>>36961845
Fuck beer I need a whiskey.

>>36961820

Farewell my fellow mage, sleep deep and dream well.
I hope you wake in the morning and find all is well.

>>36961746
Haha. That wasn't so bad. Tasted even better than the first time. Kind of anticlimactic but -
>>36961819
>ELDRITCH KNIGHT CROMINA, THE POWERS, and alcohol, YOU WERE MOST GENEROUSLY GIFTED HAVE DRIVEN YOU TO DESPAIR. AS IT IS THE HOLIDAYS, I CAN UNDO THE BONDS THE FOUL DEVIL LAID UPON YOU. IS THIS IN ACCORD TO YOUR WISHES? BEAR IN MIND, THIS WILL ALSO SUNDER YOUR CONNECTION TO THE MAGICAL ARTS, YOU WILL HAVE TO LEARN ANY MAGIC BY YOUR OWN ABILITY.

Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>36961845
No more beer!
>>36961852
This isn't actually that bad. Oh, and sorry Noone
>gut punch

>>36961837
Hey, I can't move with proper support. It's very easy for these things to slip out of this dress when I have nothing holding them in. So do something useful and divine where my bra and panties are already.

>>36961859

*offers some peppermint schnapps*

It is all I have outside of ludicriously powerful
energy

drinks

>>36961757
>>36961867

And here I thought you were actually talking about puppies the dog...

>>36961863
*Drinks a shot of whiskey*

>>36961867
Krampus has them, you won't want them back. *shudders*

File: qb5.gif (473 KB, 480x270)

473 KB GIF

>>36961819
Awwww, come on Cromina, no one here thinks you are that bad. And certainly not me, you are a good friend. Would it make you feel better if I let you hug me?

File: d5a349b13ba6d8e44784255f3(...).jpg (235 KB, 707x1000)

235 KB JPG

>>36961845
>>36961859
I want a nice big glass of milk. Then a nice long nap on someone or something warm.
Christmas cheer is not for me.
>>36961857
Ive heard worse. Far worse.

>>36961888

To be faaaaair, Kraampus miiiiiight neeeds them for his shishter.

She ish wonderfulleeeee well endoweddd.

*nods off*

>>36961888
DAMN IT! That was my favorite pair!

>>36961886
Don't be silly, Fluffy is right here. Which is lucky for me since I need him to go fetch something.

Fluffy! Be a good boy and go fetch mommy some underwear from my drawer.

>>36961880
Thanks *takes and drink some*

>>36961897
I'm sure one of the apprentices or a pyromancer can oblige the latter. For the former here *tosses her a bottle*

>>36961912
Considering what I saw him doing over them, they aren't for his sister.

File: Mort_punching_Noone.gif (3.7 MB, 320x180)

3.7 MB GIF

>>36961865

>>36961926
Woops

*a portal appears behind Twitch*
*inside a group of minotaurs wearing glowing red nose rings stands around a giant tree decorated with eyes hanging from strings moo-ing in festive unison*

>Noone stains the carpet with blood and guts

>>36961897
Care to enlighten me then?
I wouldn't use them for you of course, you are a decent sort. But you wouldn't believe how many paladins who see my tower and come to the conclusion that I must be smited off the face of the earth.
>>36961926
Wow, how is he still alive?
>>36961935
How did you do that? Do it again!

>>36961837
>>36961843
>>36961892

*sniff* Do, do, do you really?
>>36961863
I-I can not do that. I could never manage to wield tha arcane arts without the pact, I suck at studying proper arcane magic, my soul is sold forever. Once a whore, forever a whore, eh? Damn, the booze effect is wearing down *sob*

>>36961956
No
>>36961949
Clean that up

>>36961921
*Chugs the bottle without more than a cursory glance* Yeah maybe. Though I think i'll just curl in front of a fireplace. I'm not feelin like anything with people.
>>36961956
Maybe another time I'll tell you, They aren't usually imaginative but they get the job done I guess.

>>36961964
Of course. Don't cry. Here, have some coffee

>>36961971
>Does his best to put his stomach plug back in

>>36961974

zzzzzz..fire......

*The tree catches fire causing the minotaurs to start searching desperately for water*

>>36961921
Damn it, I'll get Krampus for this next year. That was my most comfortable pair...

>>36961971
Are you sure? We got plenty of apprentices who are on the verge of dropping out that you could demonstrate on.

>>36962006
Good. Now go get a mop, and clean it up. Also hold still *stabs Noone with the dagger Stabby gave Mortimer

Well, it seems I'm the victor of this rap battle. The outcome was never in doubt.

>>36961791
*Niamal falls to the floor, black mist escaping from her mouth*
I-hah, ah... it's finally gone!
Pierre, how did you know how to remove that awful rhyme-ghoul?

You'd given it a battle it couldn't win!
And I promise to never rhyme ever again!
...except for that one, that was an accident.

>>36962034
I'm sure
>>36962059
Coffee?

>>36961892
>YOUR KIND SHOULD NOT BE HERE, INCUBATOR. YOU SHOULD RETURN TO YOUR OWN PLANE. THERE ARE SOME WHO DISAGREE WITH YOUR...METHODS.
>>36961964
>VERY WELL. I SHALL NOT FORCE YOU TO MAKE A DECISION. KNOW THAT SHOULD YOU CHANGE YOUR MIND, THIS VESSEL CAN AID YOU. WHEN HE IS NOT ACTING LIKE A BLUNDERING MONKEY.

>FOR NOW, I SHALL RETREAT FROM THIS PLANE. DISPOSE OF THE ALCOHOL THAT ALLOWED ME TO POSSESS THIS ONE.

>>36962059
I live a very complicated lifestyle.

>>36961985
*sniff * thank you, you a good guy, mort, why are you wasting your time with a whore like *sob* myself?

>>36962086
Because your my friend. Also, please stop calling your self a whore. Now lets just laugh at Noone's predicament

>>36962062
Do you have Arabica?
>>36962069
Well... thanks. The damn thing wore out my throat and loosened my chastity belt. I think it may have come from Antruthius' merry rhymes, but I can't be sure.
Have you had this building ghoul-proofed?

>>36962100
Here you go.

>>36962100
Must have picked it up out on the town.
>>36962066
Don't make me fucking rap battle you out of him too. Got rhymes to spare up in this bitch.

>>36962117
Much appreciated, Mortimer.
>>36962119
Wait, out on the town? You mean, while it was possessing me, it... gods below, I can't have!

>>36962099
But I am, this is why no one likes me, Fryia was right yesterday, and Jheska was right all along, I am a short sighted cretin and a whore.

>>36962086
>>36962099
>Is cleaning up his own blood and guts when assassins in the rafters dump a bucket of pigs blood on him, ruining his prom.

>>36962140
I don't think it did, you'd probably know by now.

>>36962119
>this bitch.
Thank you for reminding me what do you think about me pierre.

Argh. My head. Feels like that one time I pissed off a transportationmancer. Ugh, is Mort here? I could really go for some coffeeeee
>vomits up glowing gemstones
That's new...and really gross.
>>36962119
Can you say that one more time, Pierre? Preferably when your twin brothers aren't speaking as well. They're very loud.

>>36962141
Stop calling yourself that. I mean, honestly, you want to admit that Bitch Jheska was right? Get your self together and look at>>36962151
wasn't that funny?
>>36962180
here

>>36962152
Well, I did mention the chastity belt was loosened. Hopefully it's a mere fluke, but at least it's out of me now.
>>36962141
Don't speak like that! You are an honorable and likable person! Now, I don't know you well, but Anfarthon has spoken only praise of your actions. After all, if you weren't a good person inside, the Empyreans wouldn't have seen fit to save you.

>>36962176
By "this bitch" I meant in this general area. You're a lovely person Cromina, I genuinely think quite highly of you.
>>36962180
I threatened whatever was possessing you with a verbal smackdown. After witnessing the lyrical massacre earlier, I believe it reconsidered controlling you.

I'm so sorry for my late arrival. I somehow got roped into helping the thieves guild steal a powerful scroll, only for their client to try to kill us when we delivered it. Didn't even get a chance to scribe the damn thing. Well, that aside, I did manage for procure a few small gifts on my travels.

For Mr. Wakelong, I happened to find some fine teas. I know coffee is your drink of choice, but I figured anything caffeinated could make for a useful spell component.

For Ms. Cromina, I have a warhammer of Orcish craft. It is not the work of a master smith, nor is it enchanted, but it has served me quite well over the years, and belongs in the hands of a fellow combat caster.

I don't have any gifts for our Paladin guest, but I offer a free weapon or armor enchantment.

File: qb3.png (213 KB, 608x348)

213 KB PNG

>>36962141
Since when did you listen to anything Jheska said? Almost everything she said was intended to get under our skins and held very little truth. You are fine Cromina, so stop worrying.

>>36962218
Oh, Thanks for the offer but I'll pass. I'm not very trusting of magic.

>>36962209
>>36962197
>Anfarthon has spoken only praise of your actions
Meh, spare me these cheap lies
>>36962185
Who knows, I am the dumb one around here, I should have sticked to what I did in the fighter's guild, wait for orders and maim the things I am pointed at.
>>36962218
N-now you are really not even trying anymore, right? We got it, cromia 's dumb, where is the pun, guys, why are you not doubling over?

>>36962274
Your not dumb. I mean, look at me! I have little to no magical abilities what so ever. I walk through these halls everyday thinking I'm going to die. but I don't, and I keep on doing it.

>>36962274
"Why so glum my scary chum?"

>>36962185
Oh thanks Mort. You should really take over the Coffeemancy department. Or create it. I don't remember if it exists.
>>36962209
Wonderful. Here I was hoping to go a century without possession. Thanks Pierre.
You wouldn't happen to know anything about these gems I vomited, would you? They feel powerful. Very powerful....almost like they're solidified souls but...empty?
>>36962239
Wat. Jheska? Is she back? Was I possessed by JHESKA? Or am taking this completely out of context.

>>36962274
Cromina, I swear on every secret I keep that I don't think ill of you. We are all your friends here, now cheer up, kiss your man, and have some fun.

>>36962310
We have one of those?

>>36962274
Cromina, you're in violation of the Self-Esteem Act! I'll have to take your punishment into my own hands!
>hugs

>>36962274
You? Dumb? Don't make me laugh. We have graduates that are far dumber than you. And don't get me started on how many apprentices fit that description.

>>36962274
According to you I'm not even 'people' and I'm here. And I don't cast spells of an arcane sort and barely use my divine powers. You are rude to me, But besides that your friends seem to genuinely like you, So you must be fine to them. Don't be so hard on yourself.

>>36962336
Fucking adorable.

File: qb.png (86 KB, 262x328)

86 KB PNG

>>36962310
No, Jheska is dead, very, very dead. She was delicious though.

>>36962302
Did you ever make a pact with devils to solve rhis problem? Right, you did not, cause you not dumb as me
>>36962324
>>36962336

let me go guys, I spoiled your wizardmas and don't want to ruin it further.

File: Powerfulmotor.jpg (43 KB, 640x480)

43 KB JPG

Muwahaha!

How are you all this evening? Sorry I was at a holiday swamp party with the mushroom people.

>>36962376
Do you leave open invitations to your family who keeps bugging you to get married?
>>36962386
Hello vex

>>36962376
>hugs
I've got a cantrip for this!
>Jubiliate

>>36962274
This isn't some jab at you. I forged this hammer myself after my father taught me his craft. I know what it's like having trouble fitting in with the guild. I'm one of the only Half-Orcs and I joined after dropping out of the Fighter's guild, so I've heard quite a few remarks about being a brute, but look at me now! Even the Thieves Guild is seeking out my assistance!

>>36962376
"I think you are my favorite person here. You're the only person who hasn't laughed at me tonight."

>>36962332
Let's see.
<Long Distance Blink>
It does now.
>pins a golden coffee mug on Mortimer
Congratulations, Head Coffeemancer Mortimer.
>>36962376
>cleans one of the gemstones
Cromina, swallow this. I've got a good feeling about this. Really.
>>36962386
Been worse. I got possessed apparently.

File: old cog.jpg (213 KB, 900x900)

213 KB JPG

>>36962397
Mortimer! For Wizardmas, I give you this! It's an old gear for an ancient dwarven coffee machine from the mountains of the far east. They say these house-sized machines could brew delicious bean-based beverages for an entire city! Fascinating.

Not sure if you can get any practical use out of it, but I thought you might like it.

>>36962472
Awesome
>>36962473
Thank you. This will look nice in my collection

File: KyubeyStare.jpg (112 KB, 1280x720)

112 KB JPG

>>36962376
Wizardmas is far from spoiled, I mean look around, even after your self-loathing tantrum we are still here for you.
>>36962386
Oh Vex, good to see you, happy Wizardmas. Everything goin alright?

>>36962506
Ah, my dear Quin. I got you this old spell that may restore you back to human form.

The catch is that I don't know if it will be your original human form. Would you like to cast it?

File: 76d33e2c2a14de5fb8bf215c6(...).png (129 KB, 600x420)

129 KB PNG

"Well a few of you got me things So I think I should return the favor! "
*Wanders over to her backpack and rummages around before pulling out a stack of neatly folded handkerchiefs with small wax seals holding them folded and handing them out*
"I didn't bring anything that interesting, But maybe these will come in handy! Pure sunlight trapped in there. Break the seal, Point it at someone and blast them with sunlight. Probably best to use it on something that hates sunlight. Or I guess you could use it in a potion or something. I don't care."

>>36962416
I can cast dispel magic, you know, over and over cause this is how a spontaneus spellcasting bitch works, I am just a fireball dispenser
>>36962422
Whatever, give it to me and thank you but I don't have anything to reciprocate since I think people are useless, yadda yadda, old evil cromia.
>>36962472
I'ĺl pass, thanks.
>>36962397
Why do you care about it, exactly?

Hey. I like bread.

>>36962569
You can't dispel these hugs!
>More hugging

>>36962574
I do too. It's very good with meat and cheese.

>>36962569
You ever have giants nagging you to get married?
>>36962574
You from the bakers guild?

Sorry I passed out, I miss anything besides Cromina depressed?

>>36962586
It's rare I have enough bread to afford meat or cheese, but it's a rare treat to mix with bread.
>>36962588
Baker's guild has awful quotas to make and you have to be a part of the guild to bake bread without getting your house burned down.

>>36962613
Mort punched my stomach out