>>47582966
Eat the gristle and the fat,
Magic missile, how 'bout that?

>>47582966
My sorcerous powers do abound
Sleep away your combat round

My flame of Justice will cleanse these lands,
Now take this; Burning Hands!

>>47582966
These lights from the hands may make me look gay,
But you'll feel the wrath of my color spray!

>>47583650
(Prismatic spray also works, of course, and is more wrathful)

>>47582966
To the ceiling, to the floor,
To the portal of my dimension door

>>47582966
Listen here marine you're in for a jolt
because up your ass comes my doombolt!

>>47582966
I call upon dark powers old,
My vampiric touch will leave you cold

The mightiest grip in all the land
Watch out! It's Bigby's Grasping Hand!


I'm having way too much fun with this

I swear to fuck I'll kill you all
with this fucking Fireball

My spells can undo any lock,
For all that I must do is...knock

My mission requires me to be fleet,
So I summon you, My phantom Steed!

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This is fun

Speak to me your words uncouth?
Forsooth! No more when you enter my zone of truth!

I need someone to rule in my stead,
guess I'll use Create Undead.

This spell will make you barf out loud,
Woozle wuzzle, stinking cloud!

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There is no way to resist my will,
When I utter Power Word Kill.

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Thou loathsome foes, you're in for a jolt
On the receiving end of my lightning bolt!

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My whip is ballin, my wallet I flaunt;
hop in my lambo for an Ethereal Jaunt

Your limbs will tire, your mind will burn,
From this maze you shan't return!

You've had it bad and you'll have it worse!
Face my wrath! On you, I Bestow Curse!

Illusory clones, fast as I can make them,
Have another simulacrum!

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Thought you'd leave the fight with ease?
Try now running by that grease!

Try as you might, you'll never get at me,
I'm behind seven chain contingencies!

Gone gone the form of man

Am I human, or a nimble elf?
none shall know I Alter Self.

>>47583775
Fleet and steed don't rhyme dum dum.

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>>47583904
Very nice

Thy earthly form I shall ablate,
With maximized Disintegrate!

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>>47582966
With this rhyme I spit your skin will molt
From this red hot fiery Lighting Bolt!

In the darkness shan't thou fright,
In the glow of my dancing lights.

>>47583859
Carry that!? I dare not risk,
Instead I'll call my Floating Disk!
One short moment, away it'll whisk!
It's rather slow though, tsk tsk tsk...

Your frozen limbs you will be cursin'
Once I hit you with Hold Person

>>47583512
Hear them whine and hear them whistle
That's the sound of my magic missile

>>47582966
Heavens, hear me! Grant me power!
Over week and day and hour!
Every second, comes unfurled!
Time Stops its flow - and stops the world!

Holy shit you're out of luck!
Eat this smite you undead fuck!

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>>47582966

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Power beyond the twilight
and crimson blood that flows,
Buried in the stream of time
is where your power grows,
I pledge myself to conquer,
all the foes who stand
Before the mighty gift bestowed,
in my unworthy hand

>>47583775
I must away and with all haste,
I've not a moment more to waste.
You see, this is a pressing need,
To me, my trusty phantom steed!

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To overcome the spider's curse,
Simply quote a bible verse

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>>47583980

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I'mma be honest
That swing you made was off the shizzle
But now you'll taste this magic missile

Through wondrous chant and true evocation,
Behold my prestidigitation

>>47584022
Okay, so MAYBE I could've made the reference a little less obvious.

Too bad, your first strike shouldn't have missed. I'm the fucking muscle wizard; I cast Fist.

>>47583985
You have wronged me yet again,
So cast off the form of mortal man.
Perhaps the serpent's shape you'll take,
Or that of a stone deep in a lake.
Maybe a tall tree in a field,
Or the sword that warriors wield.
You'll be as a barnacle beneath the wharf,
On the receiving end of True Polymorph!

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>>47584050
Lucky I had shield ready, your beef I can block,
Now to respond, Summon: The Rock

Your swords shall find no purchase with me,
Magic armor, 1-2-3!

Rise from the ground, plants that strangle!
Envelope my foes, I cast Entangle!

It's time to feast!
Bring me some wine
And pearls. I shall
Identify.

>>47584128
This object's powers I shall descry
With scrutinous gaze I thee IDENTIFY!

>>47582966
Blackened bones, skin aflay
Maximised fucking Scorching Ray!

Towers fall, sovereigns kneel
Open, wound no god can heal
World turtle's back again shall break
Serpent's rising, COME, EARTHQUAKE!

With a single joyous sound
Freedom's claim leaves none bound.

Foul serpents of your blood shall slake;
I fling these twigs, now Sticks To Snakes!

>>47584105
You're the type that I do like:
One that won't withstand True Strike!

>>47584107
You better watch out, you better not die!
But if you do, Re-vive-i-fy!
Badass brawler's com-ing, a-round.

Double, double, toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble, Greater Crystal Soul Mass.

I guess I can't...

>>47584163
My janky magic will kick your casual ass,
Git gud, here comes greater crystal soul mass!

To in my mind fuck the king's mother, before my my magic, I Disguise Other!

>>47582966
Conjunction junction, what's your function?
I'm going to cast that Mage's Disjunction.

>>47583933
>>47584146
Death, destruction and minmaxing,
Want to start some scrimmage?
Fools, I am not even here,
It's Projected Image!

>>47584155
I see your blade and hear your speech
I'll misty step beyond your reach!

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
HA HA HA HA, MAGIC JAR!!

Those clouds above are very frightening,
Your skin will singe once I call lightning!

Sorry about breaking your spine
But now I can turn your tears to wine!

Deserving death while still natal
Fuck this game, I cast FATAL.

Wanna see my magic lawn?
I you don't, be gone!
Otherwise I'm going to
Turn you flesh to stone.

Now I'm imagining that these are all mnemonics being used by a particularly old wizard who keeps forgetting the names of his spells. Some of these actually sound really cool.

We are falling from great height,
a spell I'll cast to solve our plight
O plume of bird, on you I call
to save our skins, cast Feather Fall!

Your destiny's death, you'll feel as much
in the clutching grasp of my Chill Touch!

>>47584050
Fucking you say? You better watch your tongue.
else you'll find quite hard to talk with an Aboleth's lung.

>>47582966

This miracle is of perversity
That will make of you a travesty
Nonetheless, accept it with levity
Behold, it's WAVES OF ECSTASY

"Rummaging through stuff of mine,
For some magic boons?
Well, I hope you're doing fine.
Now, explosive runes!"

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>>47582966
Please, OP. This won't be too hard.
Don't you know, I took Multiclass: Bard?

Danger looms while you can see me.
But sucks for you, for I cast: Invisibility!

Gold digging bitches will come from across the nation,
when they hear how I became Midas with Transmutation.

I've got just the spell here, to make you fall.
Crap, which one was it? Oh yeah, Fireball!

A buff spell for you. No, it won't increase your length!
Just go do all the dirty work, Fighter, with some added Strength.

>>47582966
Oi, fuck these rhymes, I'm not on a bender;
Why's it so hard to cast Eagle's Splendor?

>>47584355
I wouldn't become a strong thaumamancer
If I haven't used the Mnemonic Enhancer.
http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/mnemonicEnhancer.htm

now you'll find I'll split my visage
Which one is real, with Mirror Image?

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Fork of lightning
Thunder's crash
Run thrice backwards
Round struck ash
Cut the bark
And pierce the skin
Brings the wandering spirits in.

>>47584532
I'll win a race of any length
For you see, I have Bull's Strength!

I'll outlast you, that's my assurance
For I am blessed with Bear's Endurance

Take care that you don't fall flat on your face,
I'll ensure it, have some Cat's Grace!

My intelligence is truly stunning,
I'll bamboozle you with Fox's Cunning

You'll find this pastime truly is dumb
Once you're filled with Owl's Wisdom

Pick a face from off the shelf
And try it on; Alter Self.

Dweomer's warp be torn asunder
Thaumic weft again has fell
Magic's death in rolling thunder
Two rights make wrong with Counterspell.

Hands of giants, mountain's thews
Strength of bulls to speed the charge
Ancient hero's strength to use
Earthen champion, now, enlarge!

A fading eye, A lasting sigh
A final, mourning, last goodbye
A now-escaping fleeting breath
A single touch: Finger of Death.

A man, it seems, on a drinking tear
Would search for miles for good brown beer
What icy grasp did hold his heart
To play for years the drunkard's part?
In vain he sought both far and near, High and low, to Remove Fear.

That cavalry charge is pathetically small
When compared to this prismatic wall.

>>47583969
That's some prime shit, but I would adjust the second line be "beware the keen of my magic missiles".

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Hard mode:

make it a rap

Hardest mode:

make it a good rap

You who dared deface my home,
Fooled to think you'd find my tome.
You who dared brave the unknown,
And sought, with this, to steal the throne.
Your courage, yes, I must commend,
But now this farce is at its end.
Know nothing else, and scream alone,
As now I change your Flesh to Stone.

Fear of even coming near
For a new one I will tear
Clear through you and right from here
With a goddamn eldritch spear.

Gods dance among us
I will walk the paths they stride
Ethereal Jaunt

>>47582966
Now this is a story all about how
Your carriage flipped, turned upside down
But I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there
I'll tell you how I became a Wizard and casted Repair.

>>47583661
Aww skeet skeet

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Hear them rattle, see them shake
Rising up, feel the earth quake
They come in hordes, my faithful thralls
They shamble to me, to heed my calls
Fleshed stripped bare, bones bleach white
I Create Undead, they walk tonight!

Gasp! Bested by the power you wield!
Oh wait, I forgot. I prepped Shield.

Seams unsewn or metal bending?
This repair behooves my Mending!

Oh, I'm sorry, did you have plans?
Take this! My Pocket Burning Hands!

Good thread.

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BY THE SUN AND BY THE MOON
LIGHTNING BOLT
KRACKABOOM!

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THE DANGER CLAW SHALL SNIP AND SNAP
ULTIMATE POWER CRAB ATTACK

I laugh and taunt and pester and jeer
while i'm in Otillukes Resilient Sphere

Archon's flames, swarm around
Burn the sky and shred the ground
Hide the Moon; avert the Sun
Constellation Requiem

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bagic fagic
detect magic

>>47582966
Empowered with hellish flames
Hellish Rebuke will end your game

>>47583766
dankest wizard award nominee

>>47585869
underrated post

I'm not sure what you'll do
But i cast summon monster II

>>47583850
I love you

>>47585869
I overkeked.

>>47583755
Kek

Higgity Piggity,
Piggity Wok!
Shit's getting hairy,
So now Time Stop!

>>47582966
Prestidigitation
Wiggle the fingers, scrunch the nose,
into the world magic goes,
create, color, cool or warm,
to a simple whim, I give form!

I love these threads, and sincerely wish that it didn't make me feel awkward to say magic rhymes like this at the table.

>>47582966
But of thistle and a little this,
How 'bout you choke on my rock fist!

>>47582966
Roses are red
Violets are blue
My balls are on fire
Have them at (you)

>>47582966
There's an inferno loose in the hall! Oops, that wasn't supposed to be fireball!

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>>47582966
HARD MODE: for each spell level you must add that many additional lines to your rhyme

a level 0 spell requires 2 rhyming lines while a level 9 would require 11

From the shoulder,
Beyond the wrist!
Loot out evildoer,
Here's bigby's fist!

The greatest chance, shine through the night
A twist of fate, to change the world, and set it right
Magic unbound, powerful and true
There is no limit, to what it can do
Look to the skies, see it's light
Feel the warmth, of true hope bright
Twinkle twinkle, smallest star
Wonder not how far you are
Within my hand I hold you near
To keep you close and chase away fear
Up above the world so high
A diamonds worth could only try
I speak these words, my desire I accomplish
Now change this world, and grant my Wish!

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>>47582966
Break out the smiles you weary, sore nations
It's time I amuse you with prestidigitation.

My kid talked back and I disliked his tone
so I stood up and blasted flesh into stone.

My old man's really turned into a bore
now all he does is read legend lore

The geezer was struck by a ray of enfeeblement
so he taxes x-lax as a means of aperient.

I busted a nut in the butt of a slut
and locked her inside Leomond's tiny hut

then summoned a carpenter to do an expansion
For my Mordenkainen’s magnificent mansion.

Now bow you all!
My will commands
these Burning Hands,
this Fireball!

(Gotta love quickened spell)

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Behold, through my ostentation,
comes the might of my vocation!
Through years of cant and reclamation,
I unleash prestidigitation!

>>47586245
underrated post

A curse is strung.
A sentence passed.
Brought low by grammar at the last.
Thereby was demonkind confined
Enchained in meter, rapt in rhyme.
In verse and measure. set in time.
Where naming binds all things to shape.
Divides the angel from the ape
Yet all that's measured must decay - all bars - all cages - fall away!
Come fiery dawn! The demon's day!
And thus, with time stretched far too thin for further wordy artifice, instead these clumsy couplets must suffice!
Quit! Quit now, the form of man!
Rise, super-demon!
ETRIGAN!

I know it's not a spell, but I just love the long incantation.

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>>47586242
I got a job interview but I went on a bender
so this morning I barfed and then cast Eagle's Splendor

An intern told me to sneak into her dorm-
At her Catholic school it's out of the norm-
But I took my chances and cast gaseous form.

I didn't bother with suggestion or knock
I wafted right in through the dressing room lock
I decided to fuck her and slipped through her frock
but I had no sheepskin sheathe for my cock
so I smeared on some soil and cast mud to rock

>>47582966
With a mask or without gain;
You may be a big guy, but this is bane

>>47586466
>/tv/ casting from their domain spells.png

>>47583981
Kek

Feel the rhythm, feel the rhyme,
go go Time Wizard powers, it's s-l--o---w----t-----i------m-------e

Famished you no longer have to carry,
as I cast upon these small fruit: Goodberry

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There's no way to.. Stop the Walken..
As I cast.. Air walkin'

ROSES are red
VIOLETS ARE BLUE
This isn't a spell!
presti-didgeri-doo!

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ZIP ZOP ZOOBITY BOP

LITTLE GIRL MAKE THOSE PANTIES DROP

>>47586793
what kind of sorcery is this?

>>47586827
meme magic

Now, you become an insect
As my baleful polymorph takes effect
Your spell resistance you should have checked
Git gud or git rekt.

Abracadabra!
Explodo-kabooom!
May this tome become your tomb!
EXPLOSIVE RUNE

I just turned level threeeee
these spells are oh so new to meeee
BUt everything is fiinnnnee
as long as I have my companioon swiiiine
We are going to have so much fun!
With summon monster ONE
Celestial pig, i choose you!

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someone make a hip hop beat and vocaroo the best ones

wizard core

>>47586109
Just play a Merlin ala sword and the stone type of wizard. They're basically the best kind

>>47587647
Like Captain Dan and the Scurvy Crew is pirate rap?

>>47582966
Begone, farewell, ye sad, sad man!
It's about time you kick the can!

>>47582966
Fear not descent from cliff so tall
With power of my Feather F-

SPLAT

>>47582966
Bone to socket, blood to vein
Make this person whole again
(For healing spells)

And an alternate version of the 2nd line:
Stitch the wound and dull the pain

Thus your state will soon to worsen
Should say I, upon you -- Hold Person.

People say my rhymes too ill/but I skipped sick it's Power Word: Kill

>>47582966
Swiggity swaggity
I am now
Surrounded by booty

>>47584756
Now, this is a legend all about how
My spell got flipped-turned upside down
And I'd like to cast a new one
Just sit right there
I'll jinx you till you become the clown of the town that's your lair

I shouldn't cast it in a hall,
But here it goes, my fireball.

>>47586242
Come, come! To me! Thou twisted shapes
From the mind to the Real escape.
Assail my foes with wicked speech,
Tell the darkest fears to each.
Like to a nightmare you are akin,
Springing from man's darkest sin.
You that stand against my might,
Prepare for deadly phantom fright.
Before your eyes dark things appeared,
You wring your hands and pull your beard,
Tormented by the things most feared,
As I bring about a deadly Weird!

>>47582966
>2-4-6-8
>Who do we DISINTEGRATE

>Hey Bigby you so grand
>When I cast your grasping hand
>Hey Bigby

>here i sit, broken hearted
>tried to Wish but Burning Arc'd it

>We're no strangers to love
>You know the rules and so do I
>Locate Object's what I'm thinking of
>You wouldn't get this from any other guy

>When this wizard casts Arcane Shield, all those who oppose this shield must yield!

>Now this is the story all about how my life got flipped, turned upside down. So if you'd like to take a minute just sit right there and with Tenser's Floating Disc you'll be flying in the air

>>47582966
I feel the lightning course through my stave,
Prepare yourself! I cast Thunderwave!

Actly, quick like you are
Bricken sty a cushion!
I'm inclifting pure
Jamical confusion!

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>>47584179
My dear wizard you have much to fear,
for hear comes Gwyn's Sunlight Spear.

>>47582966
My ex-girl said I'm too fast
Fuck you whore, here's eldritch blast!

>>47582966
Until Death's Final Claim,
Suffer under Black Flame.

It's a setting specific spell

Fuck this dumb lock
I'm casting Knock

Gods, where oh where did I leave my cane?
I cast Contact Other Plane.

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As a warlock all I cast
Is a simple eldritch blast.
Since my choice is not so vast,
You are getting eldritch blast!
Acting quick and acting fast,
I am using eldritch blast.
Your defences are bypassed
By a simple eldritch blast.
Hey you there, tall as mast!
Get your sudden eldritch blast.
I am not so simply sassed,
Need no weapon, eldritch blast!
Everybody stop aghast:
Wow, another eldritch blast.
Spells exhausted. Least, not last,
I resort to eldritch blast!

>I don't want, anybody else
>When I think about you I Healing Touch myself

>She got a gold tooth you know she's hardcore
>She'll show you a good time then she'll Detect Secret Doors

>Time STOP
>In the name of love...

>L - E - V - I - T - A - T - E
>You know what it means to me

>Well how does it feel?
>To be on your own?
>Know Direction home

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Your appearance
Now is gross;
Oink for me with
Piggunose!

>>47582966
My knowledge is great
i can assure
by that i know the legend lore!

>>47584155
You and I, we're not alike
i shall feat your weakness with a true strike!

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>>47584180
>10/10 oh lawd

Tracking you down shouldnt be hard math
to do so now i cast Find path!

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>>47588737
Ice cream, sugar, chocolate, candy,
Now become your urgent needs;
You don't want no more to brandish,
Leave the fight: you crave for sweets!

This stupid princess looks so boring
Turn her golden hair to orange!

I broke up with my ex girl. Here's her number.

SIKE, THATS THE WRONG NUMBER

[rhyming primal screams]

She's a bit more of a sorceress than a wizard, despite her pretensions otherwise.

>>47582966
From the deepest depths to the greatest height,

Let me see all, with my True Sight!

>>47589975
what spell is this

>>47590227
I don't think you read the OP

As I sit, so hot and horny
I look upon the Rogue
So lithe and slim, so toned and smooth
However, still a bloke

His form so still, I bend my will
and cast Flesh to Stone.
Phase one complete, I prep my meat
I need a girl to bone

Phase two is easy, still take a glance
at the spellbook, leave none to chance.

Cast Stone to Mud and begin to grin
My evil plan is kicking in

No more need for masturbation
with lots of room to mould
I cast a swift prestidigitation
before the mud turns cold.

Now Mud to Stone, my spellbook glows
I'm working in reverse
I notice the chest's lopsided
But I could have done worse

This method is genius! I hope to sell
This method in Wizard Vogue
Cast Stone to Flesh and then caress
My brand new Waifu Rogue.

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>>47591170
you twisted genius

>>47582966
By the great holiness of Gwenevere so bright,
By the nourishing guidance of the path of the right,
By the ward that protects against the Dark's foul blight,
Guard these warriors - Soothing Sunlight!

>>47591502
Great Lord Gwyn, God without Peer,
Guide this lance - Sunlight Spear!

>>47582966
I gather my will and I now deny
The surly bonds of earth; cast Fly

>>47591421
Thanks, but it's not my idea. Flesh to stone to mud to stone to flesh has been floating around /tg/ as a way to sell plastic surgery for a while now.

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>>47582966
She's a Mermaid, so something like this?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhJLO5pFKTI

As for writing it down, she uses knot language like Quipu, so it'd go something like
I I I O I I
O I I I I I
OO I O O O
Which would just be tedious to type, really.

>>47591536
Witch of Izalith, creator of flame so warm,
Bed of Chaos, mother of the demons' swarm,
Great Lost Izalith, Pyromancy's dorm,
Grant me your magic, flame above norm,
The forbidden art that refuses to conform,
The primal soul's power taken form -
The insatiable Chaos Firestorm!

>>47582966
Finger of death will destroy you, and your flesh (?).

>>47591656
wew lad

Swordsmanship, that's no small feat,
But when its time to battle, I bring the heat,
Leaving you gasping, your ass is ash,
No rebuttal, your rhymes are trash,
You shoulda called a cleric, my flow is so ill,
But it's already too late, Power Word: Kill.

>>47591679
>wew lad
I gave it a shot.

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For now I'm a dwarf,
but your luck be poor,
For when I polymorph,
I'M A DINOSAUR!

>>47591696
clapping.

>>47582966
I shall destroy your Earthly form
With my mighty meteor swarm!

>>47583999
...
I've not a moment more to waste,
we must now act with all haste.

>>47584350
Did this rhyme before you put it into google translate?

>>47582966
Geometry fails, lines run in diagonals
Parting the veils, come forth Black Tentacles!

>>47582966
Spammable spell too often cast
The good ol'faithful, Eldritch Blast

>>47582966

Look at my hand!
I cast: pocket sand!

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>>47584093
Good choice of spell.

>>47582966

What is your wish?
Your life as a fish?
So it is sung,
you now have Aboleth's lung.

I'll take all your shite,
Not even a spell, a Cheat.

>>47582966
Freedom of movement:
I want to break free
I want to break free
I want to break free from your lies
You're so self-satisfied I don't need you
I got to to break free
God knows, God knows I want to break free

Expeditious retreat:

I like black and white (dreaming of black and white)
You like black and white
Run run away
See chameleon Lying there in the sun
All things to everyone
Run run away

When a door is without a lock,
All you need to do is Knock!

>>47584229
first line, last ha should be a har for rhymes

Changing alignment:

Tell me now
Who taught you how to hate?
Because it isn't in your blood
Not a part of what you're made
So let this be understood
Somebody taught you how to hate
When you live this way, you become
Dead to everyone

>>47591719
hardly

>>47593475
>hardly
That is quite correct indeed. Heh.

>>47590906
A Supa Hot Fireball

>>47583899
Under-rated post.

Like Molasses you shall go
When I cast the words of Slow.

From highest sky to deepest sea,
With allied beasts, I strike at thee!
I cast Summon Monster Three!

>>47582966
To protect me on this battlefield
I summon the mighty Ice Shield!

A rather poor rhyme.

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Your summons are pathetic and lame
So I bid you farewell
And eat my counterspell!

Fuck this magic; fuck these puzzles
I'm the strongest wizard and I cast MUSCLES!

I am worthy, I believe in the lord
With my honor, I shall cast sword

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Darkness beyond twilight
Crimson beyond blood that flows
Buried in the stream of time is where your power grows
I pledge myself to conquer
All the foes who stand
Against the mighty gift bestowed in my unworthy hand
May the fools who stand before me be destroyed
By the power you and I possess
Dragon slave!

>>47596099
To protect me against the blades that you wield
I shall cast the mighty freezing ICE SHIELD!

>>47596789
FLAT
L
A
T

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Safe from this world's chaos and kelter
I'll spend the night in Leomund's secure shelter!

You stand your ground as it crumbles beneath you!
EAT MY SHIT! CREATE PIT!

A good wizard gets to have some leeway with each cast. Leaves room in each incantation for a seething remark.

Whence you venture into rain uninviting,
You shall be struck by Chain Lightning!

>>47596873
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bandit? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Seillune sorcerery academy, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Valgaav, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in using the Sword of Light Gourri promised to give me, and I’m the second most powerful mage on the entire continent. You are nothing to me but just another recurring comic relief villain. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before this side of the Demon Sea, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am seeking out a Claire Bible manuscript with your location, so you better prepare for the storm, you little worm. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in roughly seven ways, and that’s just with magic, weapons, and asking my friends to do it. Not only am I extensively trained in armed combat, but I have access to an entire arsenal of spells provided it's not that time of the month, and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy sorcerous retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will Dragon Slave all over you and you will burn in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

>>47582966
Lights, amusement, and trickery.
Fools that are, will bend the knee.
Greater illusion.

Though your dreams were once serene and fair.
Soon shall be dashed, for I cast Nightmare!

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>>47591696
damn son

>>47594277
Lions, owls, eagles, and more,
All of them coming to bust down your door,
I cast Summon Monster Four!

>>47582966
A spell that's hard to name without stilting
Is Abi-Dalzim's Horrid Wilting

>>47598000
From heaven and hell these beasts derive
and with a word they will arrive.
I cast summon monster five!

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HUBBLE BUBBLE
TOIL AND TROUBLE
WON'T YOU PLEASE
CHECK THESE DOUBLES

>>47598422
HUH

>>47598422
That's pretty good. It would be a shame if someone else cast Mirror Image and outside you.

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>>47598422

>>47598503
>It would be a shame if someone else cast Mirror Image and outside you.
>and outside you

what

>>47598528
Out did you*

Divert these missiles, make arrows bend;
I beseech thee Slyph, grant thy Wall of Wind!

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>>47598422
Nice.

Rolled 2 (1d20)

>>47598422
>Caster level check for scriptless triples.

>>47592936
Great musical taste but you didn't read the OP dude

>>47598730
Rhyme doesn't mean rhyming sounds always. It can, by itself, mean to simply recite a verse or poem.

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>>47598958
But is it the way a green-skinned big nosed witch who lives in a forest, rides a flying broomstick, has a pet black cat and broils potions in a cauldron would cast a spell?

They come in swarms and waves and piles,
an army of vermin most vile!
Chitter, slither, hiss, squeak!
You, sir are the prey they seek!
The verminous hordes will do you harm,
when I say: Summon Swarm!

>>47582966
What the fuck have you just said?
You'll shut up when I Raise the Dead.

Lightning quick, fire warm,
Come together in Firestorm.

Should I do it? I just might.
I choose you, my Dancing Lights!

I don't trust it, I just think,
I should Purify this Drink.

Hear me now, come one, come all,
Listen close as I Enthrall.

>>47600695
Dumb decision, you dickhead.
Deadlydoos! Command Undead!

>>47582966
I'm going to turn you all gay
So what the hey
You're nothing but a bunch of maggots
kiss each other like a pack of faggots.

>>47582966
I'mma delay this action here, 'cause if you don't let me pass,
then you gon' get a fireball all up in yo' ass.

Now check it, nigga, I'm gonna cast blur
so now I'm dodgin' everything all up in hurr.

One-two one-two, I'm gonna keep this simple-like,
you're instantly dead now, that's it, drop the mic.

>>47582966
In West Philadelphia born and raised on the playground spent most of my days
*Poof* Now I'm the prince of a town called Bel Air

As the earth quakes with the resounding sound,
And with risk of destruction your movements bound.
More then a simple attack, it puts your life at stake,
Trapped in hazards you would usually escape.
You will now accept that you have been outplayed,
By the strategic might of my Booming Blade!

Hear the calling of old death's drone,
Spare me now as I raise my clone.

>>47582966
Leylines and herbs and a parchment of glyphs
fireball, longpipe and three pounds of kief!

To another realm
my friends and I will travel.
Astral projection.

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>Creatures of this broken dale, fear now all my mighty gale and know the greatest mage by far, is the mighty BELLEGAR!

Best rhyming wizard.

>>47605730
OP said a rhyme, not a poem. I don't think haikus count.

My flesh shall not yield,
Quickly now, raise my shield!

>>47605763
Haikus ALWAYS count.

I spy a fighter in my gaze.
A low intelligence, surely.
So here comes a Maze!

>>47605816
I suppose they work
Even if they do not rhyme
Well, for now at least.

STICKS TO SNAKES STICKS TO SNAKES STICKS TO SNAKES STICKS TO SNAKES NANANANANA NANANA NANA NA NA STICKS TO SNAKES

Forgot to rule out dragons of colors strange?
That will be my form, Shape Change.

>Mage's Magnificent Mansion
Fug

>>47606228
When out of room at my home,
I built another expansion,
When out abroad is where I roam,
I build a Magnificent Mansion!

>itt: people who can't into counting syllables.

>durr, I'll just slap an ABAB rhyme on the end and then I can into spells hurr.

>>47585869
>filename

>>47582966
LEST YE TREMBLE
WHEN YE SLIP
FEATHER FALL
HAVE A SAFE TRIP

>>47584756
theys wont be frontin / bout you being bigger / cuz i cast englarge person / for you, my nigga

just kill me already

Preferably said to the Damsel you're rescuing.

When faced with Demons, never fear
I'll just use Dispel magic my dear!

When faced with
A charging horse
I just use
Wall of Force!

To hear a distant battlecry
All things you need is use a Scry

Boy, you sure are frightnening,
buy you're no match for my chain lightning!

Trouble has befalled the Dryad's Tree
A long fight is in store for me
And so I cast this Extended Shilelagh

The boat is dull,
too long to make port
Here's the solution
Scroll of Teleport

You dare doubt my reputation
I'll show you - Teleportation!

You fires bring immolation
And crystals of ice to the sky
But truly wizard if only
you faultlessly spell "prestidigitation"

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Telum meum jacta est.
Mors tua facta est.

>Controlling fools like mindless ants,
>Otto's Irresistable Dance!

>>47598503
You don't have to tell me twice except in the stone age

FOR SALE:
EXPLOSIVE RUNES
NEVER USED

Your free movement must now cease
As I make I make you slip with Grease!

>>47582966
To transform my lifu,
I've just the trick,
I'll become my waifu,
But with a dick!

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>>47607842

>>47582966
Wreathed in flame
You'll find your purse
unless first hit
by this hearse!

>>47582966
semen hymen demen *poof*

I am the bone of my sword
Steel is my body and fire is my blood
I have created over a thousand blades
Unknown to Death, Nor known to Life
Have withstood pain to create many weapons
Yet, those hands will never hold anything
So as I pray, unlimited blade works.

>>47607666
Phwoar lad

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Strength of Bull, to make blood run,
RIP AND TEAR, UNTIL IT IS DONE

Thou hast spent thy final breath
and languish in the grasp of death,
but though thy doom the gods have spoken,
ancient power, now awoken,
bids thy sleeping bones to rise
and overturn thy old demise,
for words of power have been said,
to chill the quick and Raise the Dead!


>>47607740
Nice one, anon

by right of might
i bind thee
i bind thee

by this blood of mine
i hold thee
i hold thee

paralyzing touch

>>47582966
you do well with the weapon you wield,
but still can't beat my magic shield.

>>47606360
No one cares.

>>47611929
but I care, senpai

As I channel
Through ash and smoke
I hide myself
With arcane cloak

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Chromatic blight
will sear my prey,
Transforming night
to brightest day.

Before this light
all seems too grey,
now taste my might:
Prismatic Spray!

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There was an apprentice named Norm,
who liked to sneak into girls' dorms.
He'd cast nice and subtle
to stare at their butts, all
using his Gaseous Form.

Let not the welts of blade and fist end life,
nor let the spirit here be broken down.
So with my hand, I rouse those felled by strife,
that they may wear the dawn's bright-glowing crown.
So hail to thee, O Plane of healing pow'r;
From thy depths flow streams of life unending.
Aid us now, aid us now, in this our darkest hour,
and grant this mortal form your greatest mending!
By holy might and will of Paladin,
let now these wounds be close entirely.
Life up your hearts, for steel lies within,
and nothing living lives as hard as thee.
Be grandiose, stand as a hero stands!
Now, by my soul be healed! Lay on Hands!

Though I know I should be buffing,
that feels like I'm doing nothing.
Deeps are first, supports are last.
>Eldritch Blast!
>Eldritch Blast!
>Eldritch Blast!

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You should have run, you cunting fool.
Maximised delayed-blast fireball.

>>47612466
You think I'll run? You think I'll drop?
No chance in hell, my friend. Time Stop!

>>47612528
Well call me a 3e monk, you've made a total fool of me.
Oh wait no, the opposite. Disjunction as Contingency

What's that creature that you've made?
Does it yearn to burn and raid,
Or walk gently through the glade?
More's the pity; dies to Doom Blade.

In the privy, getting head,
But she has fangs! Disrupt Undead!

Make my dick huge, cover her in a semen deluge
Hit with the force of Rocky, I am the one man bukakke jockey


Am I doin it rite?

A gorgon's curse to shake your bones,
That's right bitches, Flesh to Stone!

~~Boi~~

>>47582966
Eye of bat, flake of thistle
HIT THEM WITH A MAGIC MISSILE!

>>47582966
bingus, bongus, enlarge my dongus

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>Sunrise, wrong side of another day!
>I cast level 5 scorching ray!

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>>47620406
>Pushing up the ante, I know you got to see me,
>Read 'em and weep, Jesus Christ, my sides again,

>>47620427
>I was next to the /m/utant that killed Lemmy when he posted
I could've stopped this

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>>47584416
>mfw I check the spoiler

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>>47620504
I will find you, and I will kill you.

Magic missile, fo shizzle!

Awaken and hear my commands,
stir o spirits, lift your heads,
by the power of these accursed hands,
a spell I speak to Animate Dead.

holy spirits and benevolent figures,
hear my call and revive these niggers!

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>>47620761
>Animal totems and spirit guides
>Come to me and hold my sides!

Just to keep your bitch ass warm
I hereby summon Fire Storm!

>>47582966
FROM THE WINDOWWWW
TO THE WAAALL
TILL THE WHOLE PARTY FEATHER FALL
TILL THE WHOLE GANG FEATHER FAAALL

>>47582966
LOOK UP IN THE SKY
IT'S A BIRD, IT'S A PLANE,
IT'S THE WIZARD, BITCH
CASTING FINGER OF PAIN!

>>47582966
I need not raise a hand to kill you,
A rat, or dog, or viper can have that fun.
Your death will be fanged!
SUMMON MONSTER I!

Hell's lowest devil, or an elemental's lightest burn
Will destroy you on queue.
Minion of the planes, destroy them,
SUMMON MONSTER II!

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All that have been good, but is anyone strong enough to Analyze Dweomer?

Who pissed in your chips? Your attitude worsens, but I want things from you, so Dominate Person.

>>47582966
flippity flappity with wings you are stricken!
Enjoy your life as a goddamn chicken!

>>47582966
Mysterious forces, get me up in his bidness,
bless me with the gift of glibness.

>>47582966
Ravage the land, like never before
Total destruction, from mountain to shore!
>~Gargamel OG.

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>>47598422

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>>47624003
If you're in trouble it will save the day
It's smart and it's useful come what may
Without it the mission would go astray
It's An'lyze, An'lyze, An'lyze Dweomer!

>>47583512
Magic missile, you'll burn fo' shizzle
Explosions abound, your organs will drizzle

>>47582966
By my eternal prolapse I command you to collapse!!