First of all, Louie (Jara's sentient snake-tail) is within range--he could possibly attempt to bite Yessir in the thigh. You can decide if you want to do this. First we need to decide how his venom works. So, somebody roll a d10.

1: Louie has no venom, and his teeth are only for show--they're barely sharp enough to penetrate a marshmallow
2: Louie's venom causes a berserker rage. We have no idea what this would do to Yessir in his current state.
3: Louie's venom contains leftover magic from Jara's stone state, and can cause a single limb to turn to rock
4: Louie's venom causes respiratory failure, and will quickly kill or incapacitate victims unless they have artificial lungs/no need to breathe.
5: Louie's venom is a powerful psychedelic, causing terrifying visions, vomiting, and generally providing a very bad trip
6: Louie's psychedelic venom provides a positive, life-affirming trip, with the possibility of curing mental disorders
7: Louie's venom causes his victims to shrink to 1/10th scale
8: Louie's venom causes his victims to turn into frogs
9: Louie's venom causes his victims to become compliant zombie-slaves, becoming part of Louie's Legion
10: Louie's venom is a powerful curative, and can clear a person or demon of all and any physical modifications made to their bodies.

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>161897

>>161898
This entire adventure started with fetish shit and by gods, it will continue with more fetish shit.

And said fetish shit is a setup for something tragic

>>161897
>>161898
there is an antidote?

>>161898
Alright! Louie has glands full of shrinking venom that he can use once before needing to recharge his venom-sacs by eating.

At this point we have a free action, so I'll leave it 15 minutes or until a consensus is reached.

>>161905
Alright, we can roll to see if Louie's venom has a known antidote. Roll a d5.

1: No, it would require some extraordinary magical intervention
2: No, it just wears off after a week
3: I guess true love's kiss might work
4: Yes, the pollen of the Giganto Flower, only found in the Human World
5: Yes, in fact Louie can choose to make it in his venom-sacs instead of the venom

Rolled 3 (1d5)

>>161908

Rolled 3 (1d5)

>>161906
Oh, it's reversible. Voting for bite him then

>>161908

>>161910
>>161898
I love my rolls.

>>161910
>>161911
The dice have made their demand and have chosen the Disney option, True Love's Kiss. That might be tough to come by, but at least it's possible.

Yessir gots to get bitten.

>>161919
seeing how it gonna be a bit difficult to restore his size now, we should only get back and see how it comes his selfhatred rage

This looks like a pro-biting consensus to me.

Does he as a whole shrink, or only his biological parts? Asking since his arm seems robot.

>>161951
Just his whole body, attachments and all. Cartoon logic. The alternative would be horrific in this case.

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Louie bites. We'll roll to see how successful the bite is.

Let's roll a d10.

1-2: Louie's fangs slide off Yessir's smooth battle-suit, which only enrages Yessir further.
2-3: Louie's fangs penetrate the suit, but it's not a clean bite. Yessir is shrunk to 1/2 size instead of 1/10 size, and his mechanical parts and head-arrow receive no effect whatsoever.
4-9: Louie's fangs penerate the suit and the venom is delivered cleanly. Yessir shrinks to 1/10th scale, attachments and all
10: Louie's fangs penetrate the suit, he shrinks Yessir, and ends up with a 1/10th scale Yessir captured in his mouth

Shit, sorry: 1 causes the failure, 2-3 partial success. Ignore the '1-2'.

Rolled 1 (1d10)

>>161979
>>161980
don't worry, we only rolls 1's

Alright our luck is back to normal then

>>161979
>>161980
And we failed anyways!

>>161980
Hahahahaha

Well guys, I tried. I gave you a chance.

Louie's venom spills uselessly down Yessir's leg. Yessir has an action now, we'll roll to see how it goes.

Roll a d5 to see how Yessir reacts to the assault.

1: Pushing him further into Raging Yessir mode, he becomes Hulking Yessir, a legendary and terrifying beast.
2: "I knew you couldn't be trusted! Trust nobody, Yessir! Trust NOBODY!" Yessir will shoot at Louie; we'll roll to see how the shot goes.
3: Yessir lets out a battle cry and will aim his arrow-shooter at either Jara, Louie or Leandros. We'll roll to see how his shot goes.
4: Yessir's still ranting about how much he hates himself, so he doesn't notice. You got away with it and you get a free action.
5: Yessir's blood pressure shoots so high that his head-wound explodes with blood, causing him to faint.

Rolled 3 (1d5)

>>161996

>>161998
Alright, Yessir retaliates in the only way he knows how--shoot the enemy at point-blank range.

Roll a d4.

1: Yessir knows that Louie is just an agent of his true foe, the Girl with the Ass! He aims and fires!
2: Yessir swings around and fires at Leandros.
3: Yessir aims his arrow at Louie and fires/
4: Yessir says, "you're right!" and aims the arrow at himself.

In all of these cases we'll roll to see where/if he hits.

Rolled 1 (1d4)

I'll stop now.

>>162015
>>161980
>>162018
You're amazing, in a way.

>>162015
Alright. Well. Let's see.

WARNING: DEATH IS POSSIBLE HERE, PLAIN OLD DEATH.

Roll a d5 to decide where Yessir shoots Jara. We'll roll again to see if it hits.

1: Yessir fires his arrow at centre mass.
2: Yessir goes for her head.
3: Yessir decides to incapacitate her, and goes for her leg.
4: Yessir won't be fooled again! He fires at the largest target available, her ass.
5: Yessir can barely see through his rage-tears. He fires at the ground between her legs.

Rolled 4 (1d5)

>>162024

Rolled 4 (1d5)

>>162024
yikes!

>>162025
>>162027
The ass beckons.

>>162025
>>162027
NOOOO! Not the ass!

>>162031
It's okay, it's well-padded. It'll probably send Leandros and Louie into a murderous rage.

Louie can always try to catch the arrow.

Yessir fires at Jara's ass. There's no way he can miss.

However, they are not the only players on this field. Roll for Deus ex Machina. Roll a d5.

5: Cornichon appears over a nearby mound of rubble and uses his magic to make the arrow harmless.
Anything else: bad times

Whatever happens, it's drawing time.

Rolled 2 (1d5)

>>162037

>>162037
roll only if you feel lucky

Rolled 2 (1d5)

>>162037

>>162039
>>162042
Cornichon might have helped out of instinct, but he is running around elsewhere.

Somebody roll a d10. The drawing will reveal what it is for.

Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>162045

Rolled 1 (1d10)

>>162045

>>162046
>>162047
The dice have spoken.

Shit, I've been called away. Back in 90mins or so to see how this plays out. Pray 4 Jara.

>>162065
#Pray4Jara

>>162065
>>162066
#JeSuisJara

Poor Jara will be left assless and breastless.
Oh, cruel dice gods, why must you torture our poor souls? What do you have in stock for Jara?
#Pray4Jara

Rolled 9 (1d10)

I have read every thread amd never seen so many 1s. I must try this

Rolled 1 (1d5)

>>162116
You guys just suck.

Or maybe its just Jara.. Rollin for Jara suckin

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>162119
There we have it.

Rolling to leave thread

File: valley_of_secrets_80.jpg (1.11 MB, 1320x960)

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See?

See what your rolls have wrought?

(Part 1/2)

>>162225
>dat booty tho

>>162225
Leandros no!

>>162225
Poor old man Leandros. Your presumed death will probably not be avenged the way we roll.

>>162225
The father-son reunion will be very sad :(

File: valley_of_secrets_81.jpg (1.18 MB, 1320x960)

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Hello darkness my old friend...

>>162429
The Ass That Launched A Thousand Ships (and killed a man).

"Wow," says Louie. "I really thought we'd be hanging around with that guy for a while longer."

"Don't worry, Big-Ass Girl," says Yessir. "You won't be crying for long."

But Rolendas has witnessed the untimely death of his father--with all of his angst unresolved. He dispatches Yessir with a length of I-beam from the ruins, then carries his father's body in the direction of his crawler pod--perhaps to burn it, perhaps to take his body home.

Cornichon witnesses this, and suddenly remembers his own son, and his own unresolved father-son angst.

"Wait!" he calls. "If you let me try, I might be able to do something here. Assuming he hasn't already moved on."

Roll for Rolendas. d10 please.

1-3: "No. It's over. He was mine to kill, and now he's taken even that away from me. I'm burning his body. Get out of here, stay and watch, I don't care."
4-10: "What...what is it you think you can do?"

Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>162450
Pls dice gods

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>162450

>>162453
>>162454

FUCK YOU DICE GODS, FUCK YOU!

>>162453
...I've come to talk with you again
Because a vision softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was sleeping...

Alright, let's see how that goes.

>>162453
>>162454
WE ARE CURSED!!!

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>>162453
"I really could have done something there, probably," says Cornichon. "A bit late now. Sorry about earlier...I hadn't quite come to terms with myself. I can't help but feel that this is a little bit my fault."

"Hi guys," says Nu-Zel. "What's happening?"

"He said we could leave. He had to burn his dad," says Louie. "We should, uh, give him some privacy."

"Oh okay," says Nu-Zel. "Where are we going?"

Well? You can try to bring Zel along, or leave him.

Location accessible by foot:

Hop on the Patrol Platform (and thus go to the Airship)
Escape via Ass City River to the Haunted Hills beyond--Zel's heard that there's someone of great power out there
The Burg, a dangerous demonic barter town
Visit the Cheeks, the great domes modeled after Jara's own backside, and have a look around

...or whatever you like.

We have no idea where Leandros wanted to take us.

We do know that finding parts for the Human World Portal Device might be useful, if we want to get home. Or maybe Cornichon will think of something else, as he has his own motivation to get home.

>>162539
>Visit the Cheeks, the great domes modeled after Jara's own backside, and have a look around
Get a hold of some other Ass cultist.

>>162474
Believe it or not I wanted this quest to be a lighthearted good time with a bit of mild cheesecake art

As much as I'd like to see gigantic ass-cheeks, the Burg is probably more interesting.

Let's bring Nu-Zel along, he's an agreeable fellow.

I think we should visit the Cheeks, maybe we'll get lucky and find some asstolicists.

>>162539
I really, really want to visit the rebels hideout, and the Cheeks seems a good place to star searching for members of the cult.

I've got to leave it until this evening, 22:00 UTC or so as usual. Hopefully some consensus will be reached by then. Tonight we'll visit wherever you want to visit and get this good time story moving along again. I have surprises in store for you. No more arrows.

Hey guys, how's it going?

>>162576
The dice gods want us dead.

>>162582
As usual then.

>>162539
I think we should just try and get out of here and escape, Jara is still probably feeling pretty bad about Leandros, sacrificing his life all for her ass. It probably would have been a non lethal shot too.

>>162582
Shit, Leandros saved us for our ass, and his son didn't even care. Maybe we'll learn that Leandros was a dick who just cared about what a woman looks like, and he has like fifty children from fucking every woman he sees, and one of them is Rolendas, who wanted revenge, but seems to have lost that decision and therefore will have to look for a new purpose in life.

>>162591
>tfw no Leandros lookalike growing in Jara's babyoven

>>162594
Well, we could go for Rolnedas, maybe he looks like his father.

CHEEKS

>>162539
Oh my.
I'm very pleased that i am here to witness all this.

Let's bring Zel along.

>>162539
>Haunted Hills

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K-Aor4GUdjI
Similar?

...reincarnation, r-right, guys?

>>162829
maybe in the human world...

>>162829
Well, he did die a hero's death. It's just a rumour, but I hear that demons who die through self-sacrifice are reincarnated in the Human World.

>>162829
>>162838
He was enlightened shortly before death as well. So we'll see!

We're going to have to roll for what he gets reincarnated into, and he's going to end up becoming like a frog or some shit.

>>162539
Let's bring Nu-Zel along, because why not?

I think we oughtta visit the Cheeks, because if we're going to take over the demon realm, we're gonna need to start building up our cult.

Jara has had enough- time to take things into her own hands.

Jara is on the warpath, motherfuckers

Hey, we need to find out if Nu-Zel is an ass-man or not.

Yessir should return sometime in the future, thirsty for blood.
Yessir NEVER leaves a job unfinished. If we leave his body here we are creating ourselves a mini-boss.

Anyway, ONWARDS TO THE CHEEKS! Hopefully we will meet more rebels that will help us find a portal.

Remember when we almost killed Yessir? Good times.

>>162934
PS: Fucking hell, the shit really hit the fan while I was asleep, huh? Like that one guy in the second thread, I too curse my California living

The dice gods REALLY hates Jara. It is just plain insane how often the dice determines the fate of those around Jara with a critical failure

>>162955
yeah, I was the '3P' guy who rolled that 1 that almost caused us to become murders. In hindsight, maybe things would have turned out better that way :'^(

Let's pray to the dice gods for good rolls. It's a shame they aren't ass men.

Sounds like Jara wants to visit The Cheeks. Let's see what she finds there.

West Cheek, East Cheek, or The Tail?

>>163125
The Tail or bust.

>>163129
(Alright, I'm taking the first answer)

>>162840
>>162842
make him be that bird-woman's baby

So I miss one session and you guys kill Leandros.
Fucking really guys.

>>163247
He lived longer than he should've with our rolls.

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Cornichon remembers that he can fly pretty well, and scoops Jara under one arm and Zel under the other.

"So you want to check out the tail?"

"We're not allowed to go there," says Zel. "Arus says it's a...a...bad place."

"I'm happy to go anywhere the mecha-Demons won't," says Louie.

"Do you think this bad place might have clothes of some sort? I think I've just remembered the concept of shame," says Cornichon. "Well, look here--looks like a few possible landing spots."

Choose a landing spot. From 1 to 5, we have...

1: Some kind of glass temple
2: Overgrown gardens
3: Some kind of power plant
4: A ramshackle town centered around a monolith of some kind
5: The base of the accessible part of the tail, leading to who-knows-what in the floors below

I'll wait 10 mins or so to get a feel of where you want to go.

Rolled 1 (1d5)

Whatever this rolls I'll be fine with. They all look like okay options,

>>163324

A town sounds like a good place to gather information

Rolled 3 (1d5)

>>163324
wait are we rolling for this or just choosing?

>>163335
>>163339
>>163336
No rolls, just vote and maybe give your thoughts.

>>163324
Can we see any people in said town? If we can, then I guess I vote town, although that monolith worries me- might be some other rival cult :o

Otherwise, I vote Glass Temple for the highest chances of finding followers.

>>163324
if we have the freedom of choice, i don't think obelisk town is the move right now--the last thing we want is another confrontation. I vote gardens.

The Gardens sound cool

Let's go with the town.

>>163339
If someone is hiding here my bet goes to the undergrounds

>>163324
Gardens sound nice, let's go there

>>163348
I want the tail. If Arus says it's a bad place, something we can use against him may be there.

I just rolled because I don't care where we go. Fuck it, I vote town.

>>163349
OK, I change my vote, I didn't look at the picture close enough
>>163357
We should go underground, i.e. 5, since Asstolism is forbidden, any Asstolists aren't likely to be hiding out in the open or in a highly visible place such as the glass temple at the top.

>>163361
It's all tail lol. We just gotta choice which part of the tail we want to land near.

>>163376
Shit, I meant underground.

After 10 minutes, it's 3 for the gardens, 3 for the town, and 3 for the underground.

I'll give it another few minutes then roll if nobody tie-breaks

Underground

Rolled 1 (1d3)

Alright, I'm rolling:

1: Monolith Town
2: The Hanging Gardens
3: The Undertail

>>163405
Woop actually the tie-break came in 25 seconds before my roll, so: The Undertail it is

>>163407
>The Undertail

bruh

Well, it's decided

>>163390
The gardens sound like a nice, peaceful place, and after today Jara needs nice and peacefull

Underground

A quick google of 'Undertail' throws up some unsettling results so I regret this already. However, canon is canon now

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>>163423
Here have some Goat mom, do you want to try her pie?

>>163434
>>163423
Oh dear god...

>>163423
Fuck, the undertale fanbase is even more cancer now.
It's sad because the game was good, but it can't be discussed.

>>163423
>undertale
God no! "the Tail undergrounds" please

>>163446
Was that the gay one or the not gay one. Cause I remember two really popular furry inn flash things, I just don't remember which was which.

>>163423
>>163414
i tried to warn ya

>>163459
Please, stop. I don't want cancer.

Just call it the "Demon Asshole", that has less negative connotation

>>163459
I don't know what are you talking about. I don't want to know it either.

>>163499
The Tail Underground. It was a furry flash game. I just can't remember if it was the gay one or the not gay one.
The other one was High Tail Hall, I think.

>>163502
I said I don't want to know!

>>163423
Just call it the Tail Undergrounds or the Tail Warrens or ANYTHING ELSE! PLEASE!

>>163502
And just why do you have this extensive knowledge on gay furry?

>>163548
He's a furry.

>>163548
Because even though I don't like to admit it, for a period of time between the ages of 14 - 16, I was a stupid fucking teenager.

>>163502
...How do you know about this stuff?

Rolled 10 (1d10)

>>163423
Rolling to change name to The Tail Underground. Roll > 0 means change it (please) ;_;

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This quest...

>>163561
Dice have spoken desu B^)

>>163561
The dice gods have chosen you...

>>163561
we keep wasting 10 in meaningless rolls...

>>163571
fuck I forgot about that word filter

>>163573
Watch him roll constant 1s when the roll means something.

>>163561
Thank you dice gods, for, while being assholes, not being absolute assholes.

>>163554
Well, I can understand that, but Undertale didn't even come out a year ago.

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"Wow," says Zel. "Somebody went to a lot of trouble to rename this place. I always thought it was called the Undertail."

"Probably best you don't ask why," says Louie. "The Beneathtail will have to do."

They land in the entrance, before the harsh edge of shadows. Before them, they see the mouth of a great stairway leading further underground, and a quaint and oddly neat house.

"Might be clothes in that house," says Louie. "There's only one ass around here I need to see."

So: where do they go? Deeper beneath the Beneathtail? Or check out the house? Or something else?

>>163579
Undertale was all over the goddamn internet for a long time. You pick shit you don't want when people won't fucking shut up about it.

>>163589
Go to the house

>>163589

Check house. Whatever is there can't be worse than the horrors deeper in the beneathtail

>>163589
I'd say house.

>>163599
>>163604
>>163605
The houses have it

File: Final Fantasy VII Screens(...).jpg (90 KB, 1280x1024)

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>>163589
>beneathtail
I can live with that.
anyway, check the house
>inb4 pic related

>>163589
I'd say the house, but it could be a trap.
I want to fuck around with Louie, so house anyway.

It's Unanimous.

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>>163589
To the house in the hole of the Beneathtail. The Beneathtailhole house.

>>163610
Why not a sentient house that just wants someone to dance and laugh and sing inside of it?

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"Well, it looks lived-in," says Cornichon. "We'd better knock."

Somewhere, faintly, a radio news announcer for Tail News talks about the fourth missing girl this month. Another big-bottomed demon lass from Monolith Town. No leads.

They knock on the door.

Alright guys, I gotta leave it there for tonight. Tomorrow we can investigate the house, maybe get some clothes, and see what The Enameler has in store for us.

>>163857
goodbye hooooorses...

>>163589
We don't say it enough, but holy fuck your art is amazing.

>>163857
Oh God, it's a fucking (honorary) neckbeard!

>>163871
Have a good night's sleep!

>>163857
Oh fuck its /tg/

>>163857
I fear another few millenia as a statue may be fast approaching us.

>>163968
Never been to /tg/. Thought it was more like /a/ or /jp/ with those girly figurines lying around.

>>163948
>>163968
>>166598
What say you he is a collector. Seeing this pic, i thought he makes these figurines and sell them to worshipper.

>>166650
Yeah, that's what I was thinking at first too, but the news from the radio has me worried.

"Somewhere, faintly, a radio news announcer for Tail News talks about the fourth missing girl this month. Another big-bottomed demon lass from Monolith Town. No leads."

Though, maybe that's just foreshadowing later events. And my perception is probably colored a bit by hearing that song play in my head as soon as I read this >>163872
:^)

>>163857
What's interesting is that the radio announcer talks about the "fourth girl' dissappearing, but the guy's got way more statues. Something is off here.

>>167421
Well, I'm not saying what the figurines are all about, but the announcer said fourth girl 'this month', which implies (or at least does not rule out) more in previous months.

For new players, the Twitter to keep track of active times is @qm_guy. It'll be late tonight if it's happening at all (wish I could quest all day...Sunday's are usually perfect...but not today)

>>167421
The disappearing girls were probably the work of the Goreiphant.

So the obvious thing to suspect is that the girls are turned into figurines.
It could be a coincidence, though the timing of the radio message just when we are introduced to the guy makes me suspect foul play.
This doesn't mean that girls turning into figurines is the only interpretation. It could be voodoo shit.

I suggest we let our companions enter the house before us to make sure everything's alright. We should stay on our toes.

>>167784
So what you're saying is we should enter the house first, backwards, with our ass in the air and Louie playing a preceding trumpet?

>>168559
Well, now that you said it I want it.

>>167510
Except that, if he truly abducted all those girls to turn into figurines over the course of multiple months. Wouldn't it make more sense for the radio announcer to talk about a longer time frame? Like, "this has been the 20th case of abduction in the last 3 months" or something like that?

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>>166728
Good point.
Thought its just an information for us why they attacked her.

But you mean he is like Simpsons collector?

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"Hello? Did...did somebody knock just now? I swear I heard somebody knock just now. From outside! I...I don't get a lot of guests down here! Show yourselves...I'm...m-making a hot pot!"

Sure enough, you can smell hot pot, and you can faintly smell paint.

Jara, Cornichon and Zel are hiding just around the corner. There's probably still time to show yourself without it being awkward. Or, maybe you could check out that barn, or look for the back door...how do you want to play this?

>>174088
Jara can show up while the others hide.
If it's safe have them show up later, otherwise he won't know they are there to save her.

Quick reminder of character quests:

Jara: restoration of human body and bodily attributes
Louie: evil, currently protective of Jara
Cornichon: clothes, and then probably it's time to set his son straight somehow
Zel: wants to follow the pretty girl, and reinstall himself as Arus's left head and shoulder

So conceivably there could be something useful in or around the house, or the young man at the door could be pressed for information.

>>174113
I'll leave it 10 mins then go with this if nobody suggests anything different.

No one else here?
That's weird.

>>174088
>>174120
well, ask if he can give us some clothes, i don't think he has anything useful.

>>174159
Folks could be busy/questing elsewhere, maybe Monday night is just a bad night for it. But you guys are here and that's what matters. People can catch up later/drop in and out as they please.

>>174132
Cornichon and Zel should meet the guy while we spy around. At the chance he is turning girls into figurines we don't want him to know we are are, and the two others are fairly strong and can handle themselves.

Our main goal here should be gathering information about ass cultists and where we can find them. They will help us in our quest.

>>174113
>>174168
Combining your suggestions, Jara will show herself alone and ask for clothes to fit an adult male. Zel and Cornichon will be free to act later. Okay with that?

>>174194
You just got in under the 10 minutes...so I have to consider your answer as well.

If no consensus is reached, I'll just roll.

>>174199
I'm ok with that

>>174199
I think >>174194 is a better idea now, but I'm unsure if it would be metagaming, since Jara doesn't know about the figurines. If not, I change my vote.

>>174229
Jara doesn't know about the figurines. But, it's fair to say that she probably knows she shouldn't be on the front lines here in another encounter without having gathered a weapon/armor of any sort.

>>174194
>>174229
As your vote is changed, I'll go with this instead. Cornichon and Zel will go to the door. Jara will skulk.

Our quest follows Jara, as always. So let's see where she can go:

- There's a barn there...
- There's always the back door...
- Some kind of storm cellar...
- She should watch Cornichon and Zel from afar...

>>174243
but this guy doesn't look very intimidating.

>>174258
The barn then, should be more accesible than the storm cellar and there might be interesting things in there.

>>174258
She should watch And incase things go bad Twerk to distract the weirdo and then we kill him

>>174290
I vote to watch from a safe spot.

>>174290
I forgot, there's a new rule about Jara's Ass Power, to prevent overuse:

TUTORIAL: MEALS
> In the same way Louie must eat between uses of his venom, Jara must eat between uses of her Ass Power.
> Failure to eat will result in Saggy Ass, which will fail to entrance her targets and may even enrage them.
> This is the only time I will mention this

>>174317
>>174290
Safe spot wins the vote.

>>174322
>Saggy Ass
How horrifying.

>>174322
THE HORROR

>>174258
In true ass fashion smash the back door in

>>174322
Oh please, make it only lose the shine, saggy ass it's too much.

File: valley_of_secrets_89.jpg (332 KB, 894x734)

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Jara hides behind some of the ubiquitous bent metal that seems to be everywhere, and a large empty barrel.

Cornichon and Zel approach the house and introduce themselves.

"I'm Pickel," says the guy at the door. "I-I'm very pleased to meet you. As I say...I don't get a lot of guests down here! Just the occasional stray like yourself looking for...looking for...what are you looking for?"

"Clothes," says Cornichon.

"I want to be whole again," says Zel.

Cornichon and Pickel look at Zel for a moment, who smiles blankly at Pickel.

"Come on in," says Pickel. "I think I might have some things in your size."

That's when Louie notices movement behind the curtains of the nearby window. Jara sees a pair of eyes looking back at her from the dark, and a hand waving!

Okay, as Jara's hidden, we first need to roll to see if Pickel spots her from the corner of his eye.

Roll a d5.

1: Pickel spots her, and halts by the door with furrowed brows.
2-5: Looks like she picked a good hiding spot.

Rolled 1 (1d5)

>>174496

>>174512
Nice.

>>174512
the ride never ends!

>>174512
Alright. Firm adherence to tradition there. Let's see how that plays out.

>>174322
Obtaining food just became a #1 priority.
Turning the Ass that Unified Hell into a Saggy Ass is utter victory for the mecha demons.

>>174512
Good to see some things never change in this quest.

>>174512
God fucking damn it as soon as I come back we roll a 1.

File: 1436235609365.png (162 KB, 721x390)

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>>174512

Forever 1

>>174512

I occasionally lurk this quest to have a laugh about its roll history.

Never dissapoint me lads.

File: valley_of_secrets_90.jpg (534 KB, 1082x854)

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>>174512

"There!" screams Pickel. "A skulker! An interloper! A hider, a sneaky cheat! Another one trying to take my waifus! But I won't allow it! And I bet you two...you two are in on it! Aren't you? It's all a scam! You think you can get one over on me?"

Cornichon reels into the air and Zel falls on his ass. The shadow behind the curtain disappears with a whelp.

Pickel's long insectile legs could cross the distance to Jara in an instant. If she runs, he will leap, and we'll need to roll to see if she escapes his grasp.

But maybe you could still talk your way out of this, somehow. If you wanted. Or let Louie speak...he looks like he might have something to say.

>>174665
Holy shit!

>>174665
All you, Louie

>>174673
I so badly wanted a good reveal for Pickel...this'll have to do

>>174679
this

>>174665
Let Louie speak.

Go Louie. Fuck things up even worse.

>>174721
Eagerly awaiting my opportunity to roll a 1 as well.

>>174665
Let Louie speak, somehow I don't think we will roll well on our escape.

>>174679
Seriously this! Someone needs to go back through the threads and count how many times we rolled a one.

>>174726
The amazing part is if we need more than a one and you roll first it's nearly guaranteed you'll get a one.

File: valley_of_secrets_91.jpg (189 KB, 799x575)

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Louie takes a deep breath. We'll roll to see what he says.

Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>174779

>>174783
Alright then.

>>174783
Holddd

>>174783
FUCK!!
FUCK!!!!!
FUCK!!!
SHIT!!!!
FUCK!!!!

>>174794
don't ever roll again

Roll a d5 to use Louie's Snake Tongue ability. This will quickly draw a random response from Louie's speech centres.

1: "We gonna raid your little house, son, and take all'a' your shit! Wait! Did I say that out loud?"
2: "DOYOUACCEPTTHEDICEASYOURLORDANDSAVIOUR??"
3-5: "We heard about you! We've brought you a wife! This one right here! All we need are a few supplies in exchange..."

Rolled 5 (1d5)

>>174818

Rolled 2 (1d5)

Rolled 4 (1d5)

>>174818

>>174826
Nice

>>174826
>>174828
that was close. But wait... the best option is also bad!

>>174826
A NEW PLAYER APPEARS

It's a good roll! Pickel is entirely taken in! You'll also get to roll for a special gift of gratitude--assuming the negotiations for the 'sale' of Jara don't go south.

That'll be tomorrow night guys. Bedtime for your old OP.

>>174826
We may have gotten a 5, but we somehow got put in a worse situation. Now we'll have to escape from the neck beard.

>>174841
That was our good roll for tonight. Now we'll roll our way into becoming his wife/toilet.

>>174826
Honestly I think >>174828 would have been the better option in this case.

(The 'sale' is just a rouse to get inside and investigate, unless you actually want to sell yourself to this guy.)

>>174849
Good night gorgeous. Sleep tight.

>>174826
>3-5: "We heard about you! We've brought you a wife! This one right here! All we need are a few supplies in exchange..."
WAIT, this isn't good at all?!

WHO DECIDED TO LET LOUIE TALK?

>>174883

Poor decisions and critical failure dice rolls are a tradition here, I just noticed this was being updated and honestly i'm not surprised that things got once more bad as usual and good rolls are either the calm before the storm, or are outright bad due poor decision

>>175213
I was saying that in jest, since I'm one of those who voted for letting Louie talk.

Granted, I didn't have a better idea, but I also forgot he is an evil snek.

It could have went worse for sure, I think Louie may be evil but getting inside even under shitty sounding terms might not be so bad. After all she was a bug killer before her soul reawoke so she would probably fare well against him if need be.

>>175307
He probably doesn't have a plan to be separated from Jara, so there are a few possibilities:
1. His top priority right now is personal safety, and having Jara stay here seems pretty safe
2. He wants Jara to make an escape later
3. He's just being greedy and didn't think through the consequences of selling Jara

Rolled 1 (1d3)

>>175814

Rolled 6 (1d10)

>>175821
Nice

OP here. Just for my own planning purposes...how would you guys like to start the next thread? Assuming we reach some natural juncture in the current episode with the Enameler.

1: visit zombie-Jara to see how things are going at the Freak Circus, see what's up with the Half-Demon Boy, the Peckwife, the Silent Giant
2: push on with Jara/Cornichon/Zel

Bear in mind that events in the Human World may affect the Demon Realm and vice versa. Hint: the general direction will be to bring both stories together (over many threads no doubt).

>>176846
While it's been a while since we visited zombie Jara. I really want to know what will happen with mister neckbeard here.

>>176846
It's a good moment to switch to Human World. Having 2 separate stories running parallel it's an excellent idea but you have to be sure to give them both the same playtime.

>>176849
Don't worry, we'll make progress with him before this thread is done. When I say 'natural juncture' I mean either the episode is resolved or there's some perfect cliffhanger moment.

I'm really trying to understand if people actually enjoy the diversion of visiting zombie-Jara, as a story mechanism.

>>176846
Zombie Jara, it has been a long time since we visited her and if I remember right we haven't seen yet the result of our last lucky roll there.

>>176850
Cool. At least there's some interest in it.

>>176857
And yeah, as QM I want to see how that works out too.

>>176855
>I'm really trying to understand if people actually enjoy the diversion of visiting zombie-Jara, as a story mechanism.
I do.

>>176855
Zombie Jara doesn't really seem as interesting as where we are at, but there are quite a few unanswered questions in that path still so either path works for me

>>174120
face it, louie isn't really evil--he's just sort of a dick.

>>177113
That's what happens when you are evil but have no power.

Okay, we are NOT going to marry that robot millipede mother fucker. How do we get out of the situation, guys?

Anyways, we should check up on Zombie Jara, with her weird tit-acles.

File: In memory of baby Louie.png (487 KB, 1170x636)

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This comes in a few days late, but had to be done.

RIP baby suit.

F

Oh, hey, people are talking about Jara potentially being in some 4chan cup thing.

>>177238
Nicely done. I'd no idea the baby suit was so loved. Maybe some alternate outfits can be found for him.

>>177277
I'm all for it if it takes off on /qst/. I'll gladly draw Jara in a Valley of Secrets FC kit.

>>177320
Oh shit your here
I thought something must have happened.

>>177335
Just the usual, sleep and work. If anything happens (other than getting obliterated by a train while I'm railroading across North America) I'd announce on the Twitter. Usual time tonight probably to give the thread a strong finish

I just realized that, despite being called "Jara and the Valley of Secrets", We haven't been in the Valley of secrets for a while...

File: valley_of_secrets_92.jpg (525 KB, 1000x591)

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"A WIFE!" squeals Pickel, leaping in Jara's direction. "And a delectable one at that! Why...you're the girl of my dreams! Of course I'll take you as a wife, m'lady!"

Cornichon thinks fast and produces an illusory rope between Jara's wrists and Louie's mouth.
Pickel squints at Louie, not quite understanding how he can make a deal of any sort--being firmly attached to the item being bartered-over, as it were--but decides not to question this rare opportunity.

"W...what would you have in return for her? Come in, come in! I have a few things here..."

I'll draw what Pickel has on offer now. Louie will also make a request of his own from Pickel's inventory, which you will roll for.

>>178262
>Of course I'll take you as a wife, m'lady!
Such a gentleman. Maybe becoming Pickel's wife wouldn't be so bad after all.

>>178284
I know how these stories go, he's going to show us his pepes, everything will get awkward, and he'll run off to post about his embarrassing story with a pepe attached.

>>178314
He's /tg/, not /r9k/.

>>178330
Oh yeah. Good point. Let's just get Comichon to fly us away.

>>178347
Not before we get Jara some of that hot centipede action, am I right? No.

>>178395
Please, no. Jara deserves better. Dude doesn't even have a penis.

>>178395
>>178406
There is this anon that wants to get her pregnant that OP noticed last thread and there is our ability to roll a 1 in critical situations.
Think of a name for the baby.

>ask for a meal
>restore our ass power

>>178406
That thing on his butt could probably be used as one.

>>178410
How about Peanut?

File: valley_of_secrets_93.jpg (463 KB, 1320x960)

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As you can see, Pickel has a wide range of things to offer. A delicious bowl of hotpot for Louie, Zel and Cornichon is just the start.

Louie, Zel and Cornichon can each choose one thing from the list. But when demons barter, they do it with dice.

In order to achieve this, I need 3 d10 rolls, or as many as it takes to get 3 unique numbers between 1 and 10.

First roll: Louie
Second roll: Cornichon
Third roll: Zel

Afterwards Cornichon and Zel will leave the house with their goods, and we'll see what Louie does.

Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>178418

Rolled 7 (1d10)

>>178418

Rolled 10, 9, 2 = 21 (3d10)

>>178418

Rolled 4 (1d10)

>>178422
Our beloved... It hath returned...
The ring...

Well, we got some clothes for Cornichon.

>>178423
well, he wanted some clothes

>>178422
could it be... that... that ring? :o

>>178423
An excellent attire for Cornichon to wear.