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>>2524290
>>2524290

>For one
>You got bank-robbed earlier this week


https://docs.google.com/document/d/1pf0s8VrRef23OUoV6IiF9gtMG8hQkg1U3XKdEI3GScs/edit#heading=h.gp7fv7ukka9t

ANON'S GOLD STORES REDUCED BY 50 GOLD

>Anon has made some expenditures as well

MONEY REDUCED BY $400 FOR HUGE TV AND VIDYA GAMES


>The guys who robbed you didn't pull off the job clean
>You got one of their corpses thanks to a pal
>Who made the corpse
>By killing him

>You intended to resurrect him and interrogate the bastard
>Before you could however his partner showed up, and essentially gang pressed you into the returning the body
So you stole his immortal soul to interrogate later.
The canvas is getting too full.

>Now that dead guy's soul is trapped in your wand
>Thanks again again, Dark Sorcery

>You however have only one lead on where these goons came from
>The Lizard
>You know a Lizard
>One
>Lizard

>Toffee
>A grey skinned, mostly chill dude
>Helped you not die when you face dived into a castle
>After getting shot up by the government
>Why would he send goons after you?
>Are there other lizards?

L: "If there were."
>Luna places the stirring spoon for her tea on her tongue
>She closes her tiny mouth around the steaming hot metal without breaking eye contact
>She doesn't even speak the words she wants to impart
>Choosing instead to whisper them into your mind
>L: "They couldn't be trusted either."


TWO MAJOR CHOICES/DISCUSSIONS MUST BE HAD

>What is your empire going to do about money?
-Adventure King (rely off your winnings from the universe)
-Seek living Subjects (to start a real economy with taxes and laws)
-Mine Mine MINE (Plunder the earth and ancient places. Risks your army, but the dead don't have living expenses)


>What about the Lizard?
-Seek intel from known sources (Hekapoo, Your buddies in the Mewni Ranger's regiment)
-Shake down other Monsters (You've got the goons, somebody in the underbelly of Mewni has to know something)

cont

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>>2524296
>>2524296

>Luna has been having a problem
>One that is seriously wigging you out
>She has forgotten things
>Bigly things
>Some of her most powerful magics are missing
>She says someone must have tampered with the book her soul used to occupy
>You've already decided you're going to see Glossaryck
>The weird blue man that teaches your greatest magical rival

>Star fucking Butterfly
>You cringe thinking her name
>You cringe harder thinking about the fact you totally bullshitted your old best friend
>Who is now -her- best friend
>Marco Diaz
>You mutilated his butt
>Embarrassed him in front of his new Space Princess bestie
>Then claimed you did it -mark- him
>You can feel something deep in your guts
>A wiggly kind of disquiet
A: "Is that gas?"
L: "It's guilt, darling."
A: "I hate it."
L: "It's not all bad. It means you still have conscience."
A: "Do I need a conscience?"
L: "I'm not sure it can be surgically removed."
A: "Not yet, anyways."


>OR

>Will you tackle one of the other big issues first?


>CHOOSE ONE BIG ENCOUNTER FOR THE END OF THE WEEK


-Missing Magic
>Luna's lost spells could be huge boons to your efforts
>The Power to resurrect the Dead
>The Power to create Vessels to trap souls
>To travel not just travel between dimensions in the same reality, but entire different realms
>Glossaryck was the last one to touch the book
>He has to know something

-WAR PLANET OF LOOZAR
>Your tech expert, Wondervon used to have a grand laboratory
>He's fixed up the castle to be semi-livable
>Without his old set up and tools however he is crippled (or building from square 0)
>The issue is that the world this lab was on has been CONQUERED BY SPACE GLADIATORS
>They've built an arena on top of his old Lab
>Conquering this arena could certainly hold great rewards

-The Forest's Toll
>Your friend, Janna has been learning some magic from a Salem Witch named "Martha"
>Janna's driven and determined, but she's hit a wall
>Humans don't have their own magic power
>They have to borrow or siphon it from other sources
>Martha's and by extension Janna's is a Patron deity called "The Horned Man"
>He wants something from Janna
>Something you suspect might be sinister
>He might even want to take advantage of her desires
>To satiate his own
>Can you suffer the presence of another creature deigning what your friend owes him?

cont

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>>2524300
>>2524300

>Smaller issues are about.
>Dealing with them could be a trifle or an ordeal.
>You simply don't know.
>You're not psychic

>L: "Yes, you are."
>You're not that KIND of psychic.

HOW DO YOU RESOLVE (or do you) THE FOLLOWING CONCERNS

>Bow is still scratching a lot
>His leaves are falling off

>Someone has been writing violently gay fanfiction about you and your bros from school
>People have started to talk because of them

>You do not have a throne in your throne room
>Just a bean bag chair and a big screen TV

>The skeletons tell you they found someone special when they were sent corpse raiding
>It is sealed, however
>In a solid iron coffin covered in chains and full of welded angles

NOW PREMIERING KINGDOM STATS

Anon's kingdom is comprised of the following attributes.

WEALTH: 20k (combined earth $ and mewman gold)
WARFARE: Small army of 220 Skeletons
-One officer: SUSAN MCMOOT (Formerly Honey Clodbottom)
LEVEL 10 MEWMAN WARRIOR
+10 Str
+10 Dex
+10 CON
-4 CHA
-4 INT

*When put in command of Skeleton troops trying to accomplish a goal, they get advantage on their roll to succeed+Half of Susan's level

LAND: THE HOLE'S FLYING FORTRESS
-It's a flying castle in a dead universe
-too bad you can't get it out without Luna's Universal travel

MAGIC: (Low)

ANONYMOUS MCMOOT (Das you)
Luna Webwillow (your mom)
THE SAXOWAND: BUTTER JOHNSON (your implement of Jazz music intensifying)

TECH: Low-steam
-You have semi working electricity in the castle
-With lots of bugs and experimental mechanisms
-Wondervon could really use his tools


Good luck, friends.
Stay blesst.


L: "Oh, Anonymous."
A: "Yeah?"
L: "Do you know what tomorrow is?"
A: "The day we take over the world?"
L: "Eventually, dear. More importantly it's Saturday!"
A: "Y-yeah?"
L: "So you're going out."
A: "I am?"
L: "Oh yes."
>Luna's smile
>It warms your heart
>It also freezes your lungs
L: "We're going to go and have 'fun' ."


bles

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>>2524306
>>2524306

NEXT SESSION SATURDAY!

7:00PM
US
CENTRAL TIME!
Beneath my blue exterior...an OCEAN of cursed images

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>>2524318
>an OCEAN of cursed images

>>2524306
Dammit! I hate this format!

First off we're doing forest's troll. As much as I infinitely want to go and give that Blue Bugger Glossaryck a piece of my mind, he'll still be there in a week. Janna might not. She has a potential time limit and glossy doesn't. We need to solve it now.

As for the micro problems.

Bow clearly has bugs, get him a monkey to pick them out for him. They're good at that.

We need to obviously hack Echocreekcronicals.com and find out the true identity of who's running it.

Go to Throne's R Us and get something super comfy, a recliner of some kind. With cup holders.

Fucking, bust that coffin open! RIP it open ourselves! Simple! Or just get a crowbar and have bow lay on the other end of it.

>>2524300

We gotta go off to help Janna out with some shit/ She's got a timelimit, the rest not so much

>>2524306
>Forest's Toll
Save Janna. I want her a be a witchy commander in our future army. But right when that's taken care of, we go for Glossaryck.

Ask around to get the source of the fanfiction. Someone has to know, or can lead us on the right track. Then we confront them ourselves.

Assign some undead to walk Bow in Mewni. Can't think of much else other than getting a working sun for Luna's world.

We could probably ignore the throne thing for now.

See if Wondervon or Luna have anything to check what's in the coffin before we crack it open.

>>2524339
>>2524296
Oh, as for those two other things. Why don't we just do them all? Start a real economy, still get some income from our universal winnings, while also having our skelebois plunder earth ruins?

And why don't we just ask Hek and the rangers if they know what's up while our bois shake down goons? I don't see why they gotta be mutually exclusive.

>>2524306

>What is your empire going to do about money?
-Adventure King (rely off your winnings from the universe)
We Barbarian King now, fuck dealing with economy spreadsheets

>CHOOSE ONE BIG ENCOUNTER FOR THE END OF THE WEEK
-The Forest's Toll
Friends come first

>Bow is still scratching a lot
Ask Star if there's anyone in Mewni who can treat swamp drakes
>Someone has been writing violently gay fanfiction about you and your bros from school
>People have started to talk because of them
READ THEM, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD ADD TO THE SPANK BANK
>You do not have a throne in your throne room
>Just a bean bag chair and a big screen TV
Solution, upgrade to a big PLASMA screen TV and add a table for snacks and drinks with some extra seats. LAN parties anyone?
>The skeletons tell you they found someone special when they were sent corpse raiding
>It is sealed, however
>In a solid iron coffin covered in chains and full of welded angles
Deal with this later
>GUILT AND CONSCIENCE
I really hope we can deal with Anon and Marco sometime soon. I want them to be friends again.

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>>2524306
UPDATING SHEETS

Will do my voting later.

>>2524296
>What is your empire going to do about money?
-Seek living Subjects (to start a real economy with taxes and laws)

>What about the Lizard?
-Seek intel from known sources (Hekapoo)

>>2524300
>CHOOSE ONE BIG ENCOUNTER FOR THE END OF THE WEEK
-Missing Magic

>>2524306
>Bow
Take him to Mewni
They have to have Vets or something right?

>Fanfics
Talk to Sabrina and get information from her, she seems to know alot about these homo happenings.

>Throne
Literally not a problem

>Iron Coffin
Find out where they found it, and ask Luna why it would be sealed like this.

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>>2524290
>NEXT SESSION SATURDAY!
Not sure what i expected but my balls feel tickled
It's not a good feel

>>2524371
>They have to have Vets or something right?
They hunt Swamp Drakes as rites of passage and Star was disgusted by the thought of having one as a pet. I don't think any vet's gonna be able to treat him. Even then, mewman doctor's suck.

>What is your empire going to do about money?
>Operation Gimme the Loot
We need a steady supply of materials. That means we need a mine. Wondervon is a galaxy class master in mining, but he needs tools. We also need skelebois. This presents an opportunity.
We put Wondervon in charge of a crew of boys, dressed up to appear as mortal beings with Susan to oversee it and keep tabs on wondervon. We allow him use of the squad to gather earth level tools, equipment, materials to get our tech up. Give him a starting budget of $5K but he can loot the rest. Minimal deaths and collateral damage. Slower is preferable to loud. Have him focus on getting tools for mining, power and a location for raw material. South American Jungle, Yukon, Africa. Various locals where we can work remote without harassment.

>What about the Lizard?
>An invitation to Tea

Shake down the monsters but more to send a message to Toffee that we are inviting him to talk. Mob boss to Mob boss. Also make sure we put our ear to the ground for information about Ludo. We can figure out what to do about it later after we find out some more intel and see if our invitation gets a response. Leave a skeleboi somewhere out in the swamps as a literal dead-drop.

1/2

>>2524386

>The encounter of the Week

Missing Magic BUT, send a text to Janna telling her that there is no rush on the path to power and that she has Psionic potential as well. We aren’t telling her what to do, but we want our star rogue to be at peace with her decisions.

>HOW DO YOU RESOLVE (or do you) THE FOLLOWING CONCERNS

>Bow is still scratching a lot
>His leaves are falling off

Bow needs to be seen by a mewni vet, or someone with experience handling wild game like Drakes. Star’s father might be an excellent resource and an inroad to both getting bow Treated and meeting with Moon on the MHC. Ask Star if she knows anyone that can help with our sick son. She will be moved by our sad face.

>Someone has been writing violently gay fanfiction about you and your bros from school
>People have started to talk because of them

Ignore the people whispering rumours. Any reaction against it will just make it worse. We are a king, the murmurings of peasants is beneath us. We do need to find out who is stalking us. Post a single fanfiction on the website. “Anon and the midnight stranger. Write a shitty story about us meeting our stalker by the mens room at midnight on whenever. End chapter one with McMoot waiting to tell the author the real secrets of Echo Creek. Leave them hanging so they meet us there.

>You do not have a throne in your throne room
>Just a bean bag chair and a big screen TV

Spend 2 grand on shitty leftover meat, like tons of minced up bone and flesh used as cheap cattle feed. Use Meat is Mortar to turn it all into bone and leather furnishings.

>The skeletons tell you they found someone special when they were sent corpse raiding
>It is sealed, however
>In a solid iron coffin covered in chains and full of welded angles

Save this one for last, gather our contingent of bois and Susan. Open the casket inside a cage and prepare for a fight.

>>2524355

Also as for the money problem we need to get some living servants. Because it's more mon in the long run, and for finding the lizard we ask Hek.

>>2524306
>Adventure King + Seek living Subjects
I want a kingdom of pirates and warriors to go throughout the multiverse and plunder in the name of their King and Godmother.

>Seek intel from known sources (Hekapoo)
>Missing Magic
>Go to Mewni to get something to help Bow
>Go to the cheerleader girl we talked to that one time to help with the fanfiction
>Just do what Luna said and get a fucking sofa
>Open the fucking box(Iron Coffin)

>>2524422

So...you wanna be Malekith?

>>2524393

Boy you really think Janna is gonna listen? We need to be fucking affirmative here, we're not putting off something that has a time limit here that'll more than likely lead to shit times

>>2524383
If not a Vet, there will be experienced hunters that know alot about the animals.
If they cant "fix" it, they will be able to at least tell us what's up, so we can.

>>2524430
>Boy you really think Janna is gonna listen? We need to be fucking affirmative here, we're not putting off something that has a time limit here that'll more than likely lead to shit times

No, I hope it casts enough doubt for her to delay and come to us.

>>2524431
Not like their gonna know shit considering whatever Bow got originated from earth and not Mewni considering he's literally never been to Mewni. And Mewggers don't know shit about earth.

>>2524433

I'd rather not take any risks there

>>2524437
What the fuck are you on about? Bow is a Mewman animal, one they spend alot if time hunting. They wouldn't be so ignorant of such a well known beast of their lands.
Him being born on earth has shit to do with anything, and if it does, the mewman would be the most qualified people to confirm as such.

>>2524456
Bow is a mewman animal, but he's lived all his life on earth. Meaning he has earth bugs. We know he has bugs because we literally saw them at the start of the season.

Also mewggers are the worst in health care for other mewggers, so I don't see why they'd know anything about what's going on with Bow considering all they do is hunt Swamp Drakes as a rite of passage. They'd probably say "I dunno what's wrong with him, let's try putting him in the catapult to see what happens."

>>2524469
We don't know what he has, your making assumptions.
And even the most basic piss baby hunter gathers know shit about the things they hunt, especially when it comes to cultural/ritual hunting.
The best thing to is just ask, and start from there instead of assuming we know what's wrong and making shit worse.

>>2524494
Why dont we ask both a mewman forester and a human vet. We can pay the vet hush money or wipe out the memory. These are not exclusive

>>2524494
>Bow lands on his back, sending crickets and frogs scattering from his foliage
>They flee not too far before heading back
A: "Damn parasites."
L: "Better they stay on him than become an invasive progenitor species."
A: "I -guess-."

Actually I DO know. You're the one who assumes I don't when I do.

>>2524496
I'm not sure what a human vet would know about a magical creature from another dimension, but as long as we are seeking info instead of making him sicker im cool with it.

>>2524503
I read that as a one off joke. The fucking gay frogs aren't making him sick.
Either way, its better to check than assume we know how to fix it.

>>2524306
>-Seek living Subjects (to start a real economy with taxes and laws)
the more people we get, the more powerful our empire ,and by extension Anon, gets
>-Seek intel from known sources (Hekapoo, Your buddies in the Mewni Ranger's regiment)
Hek is on the HMC, so she knows shit.
>-The Forest's Toll
Don't fuck the goat Janna
>You do not have a throne in your throne room
FIX THIS FUCKING NOW

>>2524306
>What is your empire going to do about money?
-Adventure King (rely off your winnings from the universe)
This undead domain isn't too conducive to starting a burgeoning economy. And risking the Army when we could eventually be using that to find lands worth having a real economy in seems short sighted. Unfortunately, gotta rely on ourselves for now.

>What about the Lizard?
-Seek intel from known sources (Hekapoo, Your buddies in the Mewni Ranger's regiment)
Hunting and bounties on Monsters is kind of a Mewni specialty. And given time as a valuable resource, deferring to others' knowledge seems the most economical.

>BIG ENCOUNTER
-Missing Magic
Janna seemed to tell us off pretty hard last time. Butting in would be just like us... but if Janna's being snippy directly with us, perhaps an intermediary is a better way to Assist. perhaps Jackie can lend a hand? She's wanted some action too... she's friends with Janna too. And if coming to the aide of friends is a priority, I can't help but believe Luna fills the number one slot in that priority list.

>Bows Itchy
When he was still in the egg, we were able to communicate through images and feelings. Maybe bow himself can tell us what's bothering him? Outside of that, giving your pets proper baths and grooming is an aspect of maintenance that seems fairly typical, though for a plant covered creature like Bow, a controlled burn of excess shrubbery (and possible parasitic creatures?) Might be necessary

>Throne
Low priority. And fuck it, it's comfy right. The only subjects we see right now are our undead constructs and minions. We haven't grown to the point of earning a more qualified throne room. Feels almost like CIV 1.

>Coffin
Check for markings? If we got time to deal with it, bust it open. If not, get Wondervon to look into opening it.

>>2524296
>>2524300
>>2524306
>Economy
All three. The planet that currently belongs to Loozar will be the perfect place to gather living subjects and to mine once we take over. I propose we do so militarily and not through their customs. Killing our way to the top seems easy enough, but once we do that, we'll have a swarm of other foreigners looking to kill us for an easy kingdom. With all previous lieutenants dead, they'll all have a straight shot at us, meaning we'll have to defend the throne constantly until we can find replacements.

>The Lizard
Contact our known sources while Susan takes some men to shake down swamp monsters. Have her bring back some alive.

>Big Encounter
The Forest's Toll. I don't want Janna getting GOATED in her lust for power.

>Bow
Go talk to Star on that one and hopefully have her refer us to a drake expert if she doesn't know what's wrong with Bow.

>Gaynon
While in school, start mentally scanning people for extremely gay thoughts about you. Do this on the way to class and on lunch.

>Throne
Not a priority right now.

>Coffin
Mentally scan the coffin and if you don't sense anything too scary, have a squad of skeletons open it in a secure location. With you and additional skeletons on standby to rapidly respond.

Screw the throne
Get an ominously large couch
It worked for that one anime dude

>>2524296
>What is your empire going to do about money?
Adventurer king, but also send some skeletons out with Wonderbread, and Susan supervising, to somewhere nice and remote and do some mining. We barely ever call on the skele nous anyways, may as well have them make some money rather then just sit around on their hands at home.
>What about the Lizard?
Toffee’s annoying, but we have other issues right now, so
>Seek intel from known sources (Hekapoo, Your buddies in the Mewni Ranger's regiment)
Won’t inconvenience us to much, and has a decent chance of success.
>CHOOSE ONE BIG ENCOUNTER FOR THE END OF THE WEEK
>The Forest’s Toll
Conquering a war planet or recovering our spells is nice, but we’re on a bit more of a timer with Janna, so best to solve that first.

>>2524306
Oh yes, and for the throne.
>Our throne shall be the mightiest of beanbags, lined in gold, and of unparalleled softness and size. We shall look forth commandingly over our subject surrounded by the greatest of comforts, as befits the conquering king of the universe.

>>2524290
>>2524296
>>2524300
>>2524306

>What is your empire going to do about money?
Mine mine MINE!!
I mean, We Been doing adventure King this whole time, and we still will be going to do that, but a nice, stead source of resources sound nice. Delegation is the key to be a good leader. Also, our army is relatively useless in a fight when we are present. Let them mine, resurrect them if they die, and call Star/Janna and Jackie if is something we cant handle by ourselves.

>>What about the Lizard?
Seek Intel. It is better a lot of people looking around for us, especially if they already know the multiverse them us, them we looking around for some info. Also we will inevitably cross paths with the enemy goons anyway, so why waste our time?

>>Big Quest of The Week
The Forest Toll.
All of the quest are important, but Janna seens the one that is the more concerning in short term. I mean if the girl want to fuck the goat, let her, but if him want to eat her soul rather them her ass, we should intervene, even if she get pissed at us.

>>Bow Scratching
Star i guess? Or Hekapoo. Heck even the nice Officer we met when we got the scales for our armor. If no one of them can help, we look for a magic vet, probably at Quest Mart.

>>The Gay fiction
~~Make it real~~. Ask to the bros to seek the one who is releasing those, and them mind read the suspects. Or even set a bait, like going out with Justin to see who follow us.

>>Throne
Shit if I know. Maybe we can go to Fifi dimension and see if we can make a commission. Or maybe steal a throne.

>>SkellyBoiz and The Mistery Of The Coffin
Ask Mommy to teach us a spell to see through. Eventually use it to see other people ~~and Marco delicious crippled~~ butt.

>>2524306
>>2524756
>Someone has been writing violently gay fanfiction about you and your bros from school
Look to the original post dates. When did this all start happening, and were there any events around that time that would have caused a particular student to want to guerilla warfare our reputation?
Any chance to go thought police while at school? If they keep producing, it sounds like something the perpetrator constantly think about, bcc beyond surface thoughts. If not us... maybe Sab and her skills could be used? Sounds like a good mini-training exercise for her...She seems interested in the topic overall... and if she "doesn't believe them", maybe she'd be willing to help us try and get it to stop?

>>2525086
They could be bashing our reputation, true, or they could just have a disturbing obsession with us that involves writing a lot of disturbing fan fiction. I think I’d prefer the former, really.

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>>2525187
>>2525086
>>2525070
>>2524993
>>2524989
>>2524919
>>2524830
>>2524756
>>2524552
>>2524516
>>2524503
>>2524496
>>2524494
>>2524469
>>2524456
>>2524445
>>2524433
>>2524431
>>2524430
>>2524422
>>2524415
>>2524393
>>2524386
>>2524383
>>2524380
>>2524371
>>2524368
>>2524367
>>2524366
>>2524363
>>2524355
>>2524339
>>2524319
Just to clarify.

Quest options are not rules we have to abide to, just guidelines.

If you have a different idea on what to do or how to solve a situation you can suggest it, and see if others support it. You don't have to restrict yourself by picking just one option, though you have to figure out a way in which we can implement them all of which you pick with the time we got.

>>2524306

Alright, we ought to first focus on ADVENTURE KING for right now, but with an eye in the future towards SEEK LIVING SUBJECTS. I'm open to being convinced, but I don't think we could properly keep our subjects safe if we're getting our shit pushed in by two-timing bank robbers.

Next, get some intel on the Lizard. We haven't seen Hekapoo in a hekaminute, so we should used this opportunity to also catch up with her and look into some sweet, sweet quest hooks. The rangers also seem like the kind of people who have their ears to the ground on Mewni. Additionally, ask both Hekapoo and the ranger bros for advice on what to do with Bow.

Speaking of Bow, I also like >>2524756 's idea about trying to communicate with Bow mentally to see what the problem is.

For the big dick encounter, let's do MISSING MAGIC, as the whole missing spells situation is some high-grade bullshit. I understand the concern about Janna, which is why I'd suggest we really try to take her along with us. Maybe we can solve two birds with one stone? Impart some wisdom from Luna? I also really hope that the war planet stays open in the future, as I really want to utilize Wondervon in helping to create bad-ass army, flowing into being able to find and protect subjects.

For the other small issues:
I don't know, team up with Jackie to get the bottom of the fanfiction during the week. Can likely get some info from Sabrina, so try to meet up with her ass well.

My dude, just find and take the best sofa in all the multiverse. Hekapoo, looking you for some help here...

Get Wondervon to investigate the coffin, but don't crack that shit open yet. See what Luna thinks and wait until after the end-of-week encounter to unseal it. Could be a fight at hand, so be prepared.

Any thoughts?

>>2525381
Uhm. Well, In that case, i Think we should just focus on Janna. Also ask Mother about alternate power sources for humans. Maybe not outright give it to Janna, since her main gripe is her achieving things on her own, but at least giving her a direction and leading a hand. Heck, maybe a one-thread spin-off with her and Jackie in a adventure.

Other than that, and it could happen in paralel, we should focus on fortifying the castle. It is something we should do before we are taken by suprise in a invasion.

>>2524306
>-Mine Mine MINE
>-Seek intel from known sources (Hekapoo, Your buddies in the Mewni Ranger's regiment)
>-The Forest's Toll
>-Try to find out more about raising a swamp drake
>-Ask Sabrina about the fuckfiction
>-Send skellies to find a MASSIVE GEMSTONE to carve a throne out of
>-Check on this spoopy coffin

>>2524306
>Economy
I'd say all three...
But we may as well start with mining, as it's the most accessible resource we have atm. Those earnings should help kickstart a real economy in the future. We could even start a simple business utilizing our undead labor to cut lawns n' shit in the town? Just dress em up a bit and make it a "themed" service.

>The Lizard
We stick to our trusted sources who know what not to ask about. We want to ask about the lizard without the lizard knowing we know about him funding mercs. Shaking down in Mewni will send ripples straight to his ears. May as well make him work for his information than throw it at him.

>Big Encounter
Troll is the most pressing atm. We don't act on it now, and she might dig herself deeper into some shit.

>Bow
Probably just ask Star or a Mewni contact. This most likely has to do with the fact his kind lives off sunlight and he lives on a dead world without it.

>Gaynon
Not particularly important, but could probably ask Alfonzo to figure out what's going on for a favor of similar magnitude in the future. Finding out who's writing shitty fanfiction isn't equivalent to beatdowns or anything, and shouldn't take him too much effort.

>Throne
Lets just grab a sofa-chair for now until we find something useful

>Coffin
Wondervon prob has some scanning equipment we can use. Chains and welding implies that the thing raised concerns of it coming out of the coffin at one time in the far past... unless he was just a metal rocker or something. Seeing inside there is probably just as important as establishing contact to if it's alive

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>>2525551
>This most likely has to do with the fact his kind lives off sunlight and he lives on a dead world without it.

What is it with this sudden idea that Bow's not getting enough sunlight because he lives on Mewmus when we all explicitly voted on having him spend his time on earth which turned him into a bush.

>Where has Bow been most of the time?

>Allowed to roam the DARK WORLD Mewmus

>Kept inside the Castle

>Allowed to play on Earth

He has been getting his vitamin D, he has been getting his plant life and he's addapted because of it. If he spent tons of time in THE HOLE he'd look a lot more metal and wouldn't even be itchy because of it. He'd just need to eat more meat.

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Chill session...
begins.

https://youtu.be/BPviDed3JyM

>Saturday starts early
>Mainly because you don't sleep
L: "You should get your rest, darling."
A: "I know I should."
>You curl both knees up to your chest
>Lay your head down on Luna's lap
>Man
>Full sized Luna sure has a lot of lap
A: "I can't."
L: "You could try."
>The doting sours you a little
A: "I won't."
>Luna clicks her tongue against her teeth
L: "So brash."
>You snuggle further down
A: "Too much to do. I need to think. I have to be ready. I have to know what to do."
>Your fretting quiets down after a while
>You fade into something like sleep
>A grappling match with your loose pillows and sheets
>A Fitful, slobber and sweat covered sauna session
>Your eyes open when your guts finally get the nerve to demand food
>Luna's still there
>She's tiny again however
>Perched at the top of the bean bag throne you nested in
>Still entirely awake
>Your eyes and hers stay connected for a half dozen deep, chest filling breaths
>You don't need to communicate out loud that much anymore
>Although a few things become obvious
>She let you not sleep
>She didn't even use that passivity spell
A: "Still wanna have fun today?"
>You grate through mucus and inflammation
L: "We'll be together."
>Luna waves her hand
>Turning her hat into a domed leather helmet
>Her eyes vanish behind a set of mirrored black goggles
>Because she knew you wanted to ride your bike
L: "The fun is assured."

cont

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>>2525694
>>2525694

>BRAOOOHHHhmm!!!
>There's a trance you discover out there
>On the roads
>This bike was built to on the fly to chase down a hell train in purgatory
>The remnants of that old steam driven monster built the bones of your castle's creature comforts
>You used to smile when you thought about that day
>Now you're grim
>Dead set
>Determined
>Without sleep the world is easier to process however
>The bright orange sun that blooms on the horizon burns only slightly
>You're more aware of the cool morning air across your arms and chest
>Of the way your rib-cage high back seat shakes as you accelerate and stop
>Nobody else is on the highways
>Only a few cars pass on the cliffside roads
>When you hit the ocean-boulevard is when you finally get the chance

>BRRRAAHAHHHMMMAMAMAMAMAMAM
>To open her the hell up
A: "Ha..."
>Your hair whips like auburn fire
>You have to clench your lips to keep them from flapping out like a bloodhound's jowls
>You stand up with your hands on the front of the bike
>Leaning into the wind
>The next corner comes and you barely make it through
>Your ear almost touches the pavement when you slide
>It's perfect
A: "It's all perfect."
>You look out at the water on the next straight-away
>At the sun just escaping the edge of the ocean where it slept
>Luna's on your shoulder
>With one hand wrapped in your side-burn
L: "Today we'll be exactly what we make of it."
>Good
>You'll fill it to the brim
>You'll stuff it til it breaks
>This world has kept joy from you too long
>Teased you with happiness
>No more
>You're free now
>Free to seek joy
>Free to take happiness
>You want it all
>Some is not enough
>You want what's yours
>...and revenge for the joy that life dared deny you.

>You feel alive
>Also like dogshit
>You stop for an energy drink
>Then take a nap right afterward
>Laid against your bike right at the beach's border
>Your heart nearly beats out of your chest in your sleep
>7/10 not bad for a rough evening

>>2525694
Ey, didn't think we were on till Saturday. Cool.

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>>2525702
>>2525702

https://youtu.be/LnzYG0ZkrXg

>Later on
>Closer to Noon
>You're alone in the castle
>Well
>As alone as you think you get
>You pace back and forth in your bedroom
>Muscles is in the corner
>Lifting Bow for his gains
>Luna is downstairs somewhere
>You can feel her cooking
>Just as she can feel you
>Euugh
>She's really feeling you

L: "Need something?"
>Your brain is itchy
>Your foot won't stop bouncing
>Muscles puts Bow down to look at you
>Because you seem like you're tweaking
>Which is fair
>Because you've just come to the realization
>That you haven't fapped in almost a year

>A: "Hey uh. Mom?"
>L: "Yes?"
>A: "So our uh...psychic connection."
>L: "The very manifestation of our unbreakable bond."
>A: "Y-yeah that. So could we uh...like...close it?"
>L: "Close it?"
>A: "Like. Could you uh...close your third eye? Or-...something."
>L: "No."
>A: "N-no?"
>L: "That isn't how that works, dear. We're both psionic. I due to my presence as a spiritual and magic force. You due to the awakened nature of your neurological processes."
>A: "So I just-"
>L: "We're open books now, you and I."
>A: "Oh god."
>L: "Two bright stars that no wall or barricade can keep apart."
>A: "I'm gonna die from this."
>L: "From what?"


>You grab Muscles' wrist
>Drag him to the door
>Yes
>You drag your own right arm by the wrist
>He squirms like a salmon sized earth worm
>Bow follows as you call
>You reward him by pushing his butt out the door too
>WHAM!
>You close the door to keep your right hand from getting back in

A: "Yep. My elbow's broken."
>No time for that
>You fumble with your belt
>You were a righty before
>Maybe if you're fas-

L: "I see you."
A: "AH!"
>You look around the room
>Eyes wide
>Mind frantic from lack of sleep and repressed sexual deviancy

>Jackie's swimsuit pictures
>Janna's hair fresh out of her hat
>Sabrina's armpits
>It's all in your head
>Driving you mad

>Your sweat
>Clench your teeth
>Reach for your pants to pull them back up

L: "I didn't say you had to stop."
A: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!"

>There is no release in the house of McMoot

>>2525915
.....You know what, we might as well just accept it and ask muscles to do a solid and make a mouth to use. At this point we might as well go all in on the degeneracy, what with our mother never not watching us fap

>>2525915
ANON DON'T STOP KEEP FAPPING SHOW YOUR DOMINANCE!!!

fap to luna if you must

>>2525915
>inb4 Luna gives Anon a pep talk

>>2525915
Bite the bullet and jerk it, while Muscles and Luna are watching. Maintain eye contact with both of them. Do it.

>>2525915
We control everything else through sheer force of will... maybe we can will ourselves to sexual climax and relief?

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>>2525915
>>2525915

>After an hour or so you come to terms with the fact you'll never be alone again
>Still you crave some proper company
>Not just presences
>You need an embrace
>You need peace
>Peace

A: "Jackie."
https://youtu.be/Z9e7K6Hx_rY?list=RDMMZ9e7K6Hx_rY


>SHHRRRIIIIp!
>Even if she was just your mind's idolatrous focus for the past couple of hours
>Jackie -does- things to you
>Her voice shuts out the ones that bounce in between your ears
>Her hands stop your nerves from burning
>You caught a quick shower
>Snagged a coffee from that gas station/middle eastern food joint
>Got a twisted blue-berry powerade for your girl and hit the spot she was most likely to be
>The Skatepark

???: "Hey, Lookout!"
>Some careless kid nearly crashes into you
>Muscles slaps their board off course
>They stop skating and learn to fly
???: "AAAAAAHHHH I KNEW THE CONSEQUENCES BUT SOUGHT GLORY ANYWAAYYYyyyys"
A: "Where is she."

L: "Hm. Her not being in a usual haunt is unusual. The girl loves structure. Normalcy."
A: "That's not true. She's an explorer."
L: "She's always over prepared and announces her explorations."
A: "So?"
L: "So it's more like a planned expedition then, isn't it?"

A: "Jackie! Hey! JACKIE!?"
>Your voice cracks a couple times
>Not sleeping has left your throat hoarse
>The energy drinks did not help

>You strain your eyes
>The sun is so bright out here
>Some jackass actually runs into you
>Spins you around
A: "AY! WATCH IT YOU INFECTED ASS LEGION!"
J: "Anon?"
>You look up
A: "Jackie!"
J: "Haha, Anon. Get outta the bowl, dude."
A: "I- What?"

>Oh
>Right
>The bowl
>Where everyone goes skateborts in

Y: "Oh hey."
>Wh-
Y: "It's that guy that keeps following you."
>WHAT!?
>It's her
>That girl
>The smug one
>With the Afro
>...and the bright gold sweater
>Jackie laughs at her comment
>You see red
>Tunnels
>Shallow graves
>A set of pliers rammed point-first into a certain white gauged ear

J: "Yellow, you've met Anon right?"
Y: "All I know is he doesn't let you get away with nothin'."
J: "Anon, c'mon. Can you get out of there alri-"
>You slap Muscles down and activate Starwalk
>As a result, you essentially rocket out of the bowl
>Then float down, hoodie and cloak billowing
>Jackie grabs your hands and pulls you down to earth
J: "Showoff."
Y: "So. Do you never take that thing off or~ ?"
A: "It's my cloak."
Y: "Oh my gooahd are you like...one of the Pottermoore fanatics?"

>You don't read situations well
>You tend to fly off the handle
>Which is exactly why you're not slapping this stranger already
A: "I own a castle."
>You are however
A: "...and I'm here cause I want to show my girlfriend my castle."
>Flexin'

cont

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>>2525915
>>2525915

Y: "What world is this boy livin' in, Blue?"
A: "Blue?"
J: "Anon's got his own style, Yellow."
>The sweatered one smirks
Y: "He's got his head up his ass."
>Muscles informs you he is certain he could fit the girl's head in HER ass
>You pat him down

>Jackie seems to be doing the same to her...friend?
J: "Don't push it. He's also got a way of growing on you if you're cool."
Y: "If -I'm- cool?"
A: "What a world that would be."
>You notice her lack of board
A: "You don't skate. Why are you here?"
>Yellow raises a brow at your comment
>Then power spins
>Before clacking her heelies together
Y: "I'm here to style on broke bois."
>She twirls one more time
>Poses
>Looks you in the eye
Y: "Check."

>You fume for a second before Jackie grabs your shoulders
J: "Heyeheyeh."
>She draws your forehead to hers
J: "Right here."
>When you get back to her you're a bit embarassed
A: "I wanna yank her guts out."
J: "Murder one of my friends out of jealousy and I'll break up with you. I think that's fair diplomacy, don't you?"
>How is she ok with the way you work?
>You look up at Luna
A: "Told you she was adventurous."
J: "I'mma go."
Y: "Aww, boo. Don't let walkin' the dog get in the way of a good time."
J: "I'll catch you later, Yellow. How's tomorrow for you?"
>Yellow rolls her neck
Y: "I might be busy."
J: "Well, I hope you're not."
>Jackie grins
J: "Nobody else can keep up with me in the pipe. I need some more practice."
>You've seen enough

J: "wh-HEy!"
A: "I am taking my mermaid."
>You have picked Jackie up by the thiccness
>Muscles has coiled around both of her thighs
A: "...and my leave."
>You portal back home
Y: "Bye, Blue! Bye, Blue's Burden."
>You let your middle finger linger behind you

https://youtu.be/CvWqZ79GnZA

>Once you get her to the castle
>Shut off from all the stupid distractions
>Things work out
>You can finally get that peace you need
J: "Whoahhh! Dood!"
>If Jackie would just stop screaming
J: "It's huge! So much space to work with a-"
>She opens every door you pass
>Pokes in her head
>One of them slams itself shut and growls
J: "Feisty."
B: "Barofh! BORK! BArk!"
J: "Bow?"
>Your drake nearly throws the two of you over
>He can't decide which face to lick
>You both get covered in healthy grass

>Later on you catch Wondervon watching from the basement
A: "Hey."
>SLAM goes the dungeon door
>You open it back up
A: "You can uh...you can come meet Jackie if you want."
W: "..."
A: "I'm not -ashamed- of you or anything."

>Jackie takes to him well
J: "So like...are you a hyper evolved mole from the future orr?"
W: "My people are called Siltoids."
J: "Siltoids. Like the dirt?"
W: "Ya."
J: "I love how dumb the Multiverse is."
W: "Vow, rude. Zat vasn't an invitation to be racist, you vapid little Strumpet."
J: "Didn't you try to kill my boyfriend but ended up being his science slave?"
W: "W-well ya but vee ver"
J: "buh-buh-buh Bitcht mode."
W: "Vell I nEvar!"

cont

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>>2526457
>>2526457

>After grinding down the main staircase
>Making sure your fridge doesn't electrocute people visiting for pizza rolls
>You and Jackie both realize

J: "There's not much to -do- here."
>Huh
>She's right
>Empty world is empty
J: "Bet you could throw some wicked parties in here though."
>People
>In YOUR dark fortress?
A: "Never."
J: "I bet you used to say that about -all- human interaction."
A: "Used to?"

>Jackie gets you convinced you need some more sun
>So after a ponder or two
>You leash up your Drake
>Mount your gf on his back
>Then ride
>Specifically to the nearby dog park

cont

>Bow's itching only seems to be localized on his bush-like foliage
>It drives him nuts seemingly at random
>The big green beasty spends any moment not scratching in pure rapture
>You and Jackie both get to watch him bound along with normal earth dogs
>Much to the horror of certain soccer moms
>A child comes up to Bow and reaches for his horns
>Bow does not notice the child's weight as his attention is grabbed by a dog humping someone's prosthetic leg

C: "WEEE!"
SM: "JAYNON! NO!"
>Bow stole the leg
>Ate the dog
>You had to portal inside of him to retrieve it
>Ungrateful little asshole bit you
>So you fed him back to your living Bush
A: "See that kids?"
>The children only know screaming
A: "That's Hubris."

>>2526457
>J: "buh-buh-buh Bitcht mode."
Jackie continues to be a blessing

>>2526457
Jackie and Wondervon. That was a pleasure I truly was not expecting. Bless you, Quest.

Parties not a bad idea actually.

Aside from all the murder beasts anyway.

Also how the fuck did we never bring jackie or Janna over? What the fuck is wrong with interlude us???

But yea, I think Anon is more of a pizza and videogames kind of party guy honestly. So that could be cool. Or we could do some "expeditions"

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>>2526465
>>2526465

>After litigating at the park
>With a few death threats
>Jackie calming people in regards to your death threats
>A walk on the beach with your doggo and lady
>A cheeky smooch
J: "If you'd just chill out, Anon."
A: "I can chill."
>Jackie takes your face in her hands
>Her favorite pose with you
J: "Show me, and I'll probably never get tired of you."
>He smirks
J: "MMmmbut I can sure make you pretty tired."
A: "I'm -always- tired."
J: "Mood killed. Date over. You big spiky doof."
>Jackie smooched you some more
>Muscles liked the palm ones
>You smooched her back
>Found out Jackie has sensitive cheeks
>Because you bit her
A: "I really gotta control myself."
L: "What's a love bite or two between two hellion youths?"
A: "Grounds for assault charges."
L: "You cannot be put in jail if the society seeking to jail you can't catch you."
A: "Mom."
L: "The police are -not- strong enough."
A: "Mama pls"

>You are alone now
>Restless in your castle
>Bow tried to eat the beach life guard because he was like 5'1" and kind of furry
>So you've punished him with a night locked out of your bedroom or the skeleton's barracks
>Nothing to cuddle
>No one to chew on
>Fresh hell

A: "I'm still pent up."
>You're exaughsted
>Worn down to the bone
>You barely slept
>This day has been so full of goodness
>Yet still
>Your skull is abuzz
>Your breath short
>Your muscles won't relax
>You roll onto your stomach
>Open your phone
>Tap your usually neglected Headbook App
>The first post you see


>IMAGE POST FROM JUSTIN ARMBERG
>A picture of a squat rack
>PHAT with plates
>4 on each side to be exact
>The overlay caption reads

"PR2D2 weboutta do dis"

A: "Justin..."
>You mull over if you could re-attach a snapped spine
>You prepare to comment "Snab City"
>Then pause
>Muscles pulls away from the phone
>Looks you in the eye with his finger tips
A: "Huh...yeah."
>He has a good point
>You could use a good sweat
>You comment "Want a Spotter?"

>Justin calls you back in 2 minutes flat
Ju: "Brahj!"
>He's panting
Ju: "I'm at the school gym. Coach gave me the keys."
A: "Has Moob already stashed beer in it?"
Ju: "Haha, how fast can you get here?"
>Which is when your portal opens up
>Out you step in all your sleep deprived glory
A: "I wanna lift things."
>You flex
>Well
>Muscles flexes
>He can't get tired
>You kind of just pose
>While your body sags in place
A: "Then put them DOWN!"
Ju: "You gonna lift in jeans?"
A: "YYYyyyeehhhhhhsss?"
Ju: "Hardcore. Let's rock!"

https://youtu.be/ashe_4phX_Y

>You've never even heard of most of these exercises
Ju: "Chest flies!"
A: "Is that a disease!?"
Ju: "No but it'll make you SIHHhhK!"

cont

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>>2526984
>>2526984

>Every exercise is a new hell
Ju: "Time for those PULL DOWNS! I even struggle with these."
A: "So it's ok if I just-"
Ju: "No, you can't just pull the rope."
>You pull 15 pounds more than the rope
>20 times
>Then fall off the machine

>Justin drops from the wide-grip pull-up bar
>Sets the machine to 65lb
>Then pounds out 25 reps
A: "Fuck my life."
Ju: "No quit."
A: "Is your dialogue mispelled or did you just turn into a caveman?"
Ju: "NO. QUIT. IN. ME."
>Justin proceeds to smash all of his lifts
>He spots you on most of yours
A: "Justin...help!"
Ju: "Not on this one, Anondo."
>He kneels down to your quivering knees
Ju: "A man and his deadlift weight are sacred."
>He pats the bar loaded up with more plates than you've even eaten off of
>A whole 3 10 pounders on each side
Ju: "This is allll you."
A: "It's two of me."
Ju: "Anon."
A: "I'm out numbered by it."
Ju: "Dude. Come on. You've slung guys who weigh three times this."
A: "No."
>You point to Muscles
A: "HE has."
>Muscles nods his wrist at Justin
A: "Look."
>You let Muscles loose
>He picks up the bar and twirls it like a baton
Ju: "That...isn't how bodies work."
A: "Don't fat shame me, bro."
Ju: "You're skinnyfat tho."
A: "Bro."
Ju: "That's one step from ottermode! You're almost perfected."
A: "My mom thinks I'm fine as I am."
>Justin drapes an arm over you and ya boi
>Ya right hand man
Ju: "Your mommy's not here, my dude."
>You gasp
A: "What!?"
>Justin has to stop you from yanking your pants down in delerium
>He explains his metaphor as best as someone who doesn't know exactly what a metaphor is can
>You calm down
>Hit the Dead lift 1 time
>Then passed out

>Eventually you awaken
>Justin's handing you his water bottle
Ju: "Good hustle, my dude."
A: "Am I swole yet?"
Ju: "Haha, what? Anon. You did one fourth of a workout."
A: "ONE FOURTH!?"
Ju: "Maybe if you take a split for three days a week. In a couple month-"
>You left before Justin finished his sentence
>Portaled home
>Ate seventeen bags of chips
>Then slept for 13 hours

L: "Goodnight, darling."
>The sensation of Luna's finger brushing your ear
>Ghost like
>Electric
>Keeps you at peace

L: "Your strength will come. From greater places. Flesh is just-"
>You snort in your sleep
>Luna's hand passes through you
>Disintegrates into pink glitter
>She pulls it back
>Examines the hollow stump as it reforms
L: "Irritatingly necessary."


SESSION END!

NEXT LIVE SESSION STILL SATURDAY!
7:00pm US CENTRAL TIME!

Oh the fun.
That is to come.
I'll see you quit.
Before I'm done.
You paint too much.
You overstroke.
You lack the nerve.
I'll watch you choke.


stay blesst
Love, Quest

https://youtu.be/3bNITQR4Uso

>>2526986
We even got to see Justin again!! Sweet! But shit, at what cost. Is there an unspoken 'exhaustion' system at play here, as well?

>>2524296
>Empire Funds
-Seek Living Subject+Adventure King
The first one is finding the resource that keeps giving, the other can be used as needed if we happen to find some wonderful shinies.

>Lizards and You
Should check in and touch base with some of allies Hekapoo would be a good start for one.

>The Forest's Toll
Yeaaaah, no we are not having Janna yo manna bo Banna get fucked by goat dude, literally in this case, though I feel like we need to 'TALK' with Janna about why we are concerned. She can go through with it if she feels like it, but man oh man does it seem like a really bad deal.

>>2524306
Resolving the Small Things in life
>Bow
Talk to them Ranger dudes maybe they have a zoology thing, or pending that get that boi a flea collar.

>PAST SINS II: ANONXMARCOXTOM
This needs to be burnt or at least just answered in a way that plays off us well, I was thinking simply reading some of it and just giving it honest critic reviews, if someone WANTS to write these things, then by gawd at least write it well!

>Thrones for Gods
I'm actually chill with a beanbag chair and swanky tv for our throne room.

>Special Surprise Inside
Ok Time to see if we just found Alucard, cuz iff its the crimson fuckers there be some fuckery going on here, see if there is anything else to note on the coffin or not and if there isn't use some MAJIKS to try looking inside can't be that hard right?

Get bow some Ladybug swarms
Probably Aphids all up in his steez

>>2524306
>big encounter
I would go with war planet, but only just to get the tools, not to conquer the coloseam of gladiators, as soon as we get the tools the next best one to do would be the missing magic because it lets us do more things in the future, plus I don't think we talked to glosaryck in a long time.

>bow scratching
see if questbuy has a veternarean sservice or take bow to one that will see him.
>fanfiction
If you or anyone talks about it that makes you gay because you read it because you were interested about two people of the same sex having coitus.
Miss me with that gay shit.

>no throne room
not important yet, keep the bean bag and tv for a chill throne

>coffin
have them bring it to the castle for storage

>money problem
mining,
invest some human or other currency money into long-term investments from earth,mewni or questbuy and collect the interest.

>Lizard
I feel like anon would go to the goons instead of known sources because he's a bad dood, plus it's easy as we can just ask anyone we beat up about him.

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>>2526986
>>2524296
>>2524300
>>2524306
ALRIGHT. TIME FOR MYSELF TO VOTE.

>>What is your empire going to do about money?
While I really don't see why we couldn't do all three eventually. I think we should concentrate now on
-Seek living Subjects (to start a real economy with taxes and laws)
Since it'll allow us to not only delegate things a little, but also get recognition from other countries.
>Adventure King (rely off your winnings from the universe)
will come naturally as we do our aventures.
>-Mine Mine MINE (Plunder the earth and ancient places. Risks your army, but the dead don't have living expenses)
Seems like a great idea once we have set up a system where we can collect the souls of our dead citizens and have a constant supply of corpses, though I'm not sure how popular that idea would be with the ones still living.

>What about the Lizard?
>-Seek intel from known sources (Hekapoo, Your buddies in the Mewni Ranger's regiment)
We should seek intel with Hekapoo AND Omni., since we know that Hog dude was actually from an entirely different reality, Omni ought and Hek could do from her Dimensional contacts.

>>CHOOSE ONE BIG ENCOUNTER FOR THE END OF THE WEEK
Ugh. Thise one is a doozy.
All of these three are really important to us. Luna's missing Magic seems like a real trouble, and we need those Magics also to be able to interrogate the soul of Hog's friend. If he realized we took he souls we might be in even greater trouble that anticipated.
War planet could be really profitable, and we need Wondi's tools.
I don't want Janna doing something she doesn't want to do just to get something she wants. I want to help her, and I certainly don't want someone taking advantage of her when we could be helping her instead.
I say.
>The Forest's Toll
Helping our friend In need take priority. We'll just have to ask Wondi and Luna to wait a little.

>Bow is still scratching a lot
>His leaves are falling off
We can probably consult with Hek or a biologist expert on Mewni about this. Hekw as the one to inform us on Swamp Drakes in the first place and may know more bout them.

>Someone has been writing violently gay fanfiction about you and your bros from school
>People have started to talk because of them
Who gives a shit what people say? They don't know you for shit. Besides, we've done fetishising of other people ourselves, you little rapist.

>You do not have a throne in your throne room
As long as we don't have important guests this is a non-issue.

>>a solid iron coffin covered in chains and full of welded angles
Investigate it when you got the chance. We can check if we mind-read something from inside, and we can ask them where they found it. Also consult Luna.

File: War_Room_5.png (1.59 MB, 1920x1080)

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>>2532403
To clarify. In:
>>What is your empire going to do about money?
I vote for
>-Seek living Subjects (to start a real economy with taxes and laws)
For legitimacy and reliability, and
>>Adventure King (rely off your winnings from the universe)
Since we'll be doing that already.

>-Mine Mine MINE (Plunder the earth and ancient places. Risks your army, but the dead don't have living expenses)
Seems useful, but we need our Skelies doing other things right now, and I'd actually rather have Wondervon's machines do the digging once we get him his tools back.

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MEGA RESOLUTION POST!
...START!

https://youtu.be/yHuLdRawmEg

>There's no sun in your world
>Only the light from your eyes
>When they snap the fuck open

L: "Did you enjoy your rest?"
A: "I did."
L: "Are you ready now?"
>L: "Ready to exact your will on this undeserving reality?"
>You sit up
>Roll your tongue across the coarse, unbrushed texture of your teeth
>SMack

A: "After. I. Shower."

>BOOM
>The day starts with some serious house cleaning
>The skeletons are dusting and rearranging
>Fuck breakfast
>Fuck time
>Luna makes you a cup of coffee from the springwater you're stealing from the school's bathroom sinks
>While you sip you argue with the laws of physics and sense
>To make a call


>CALL WITH HEKAPOO
A: "Aye."
H: "Who is this? I can't see your face in my phone."
A: "It's yaboi."
H: "For the last TIME! Either get a DNA TEST (good luck with that shit, I'm a demon) or fuck. Off. You're not getting a dime outta m-"
A: "It's Anonymous."
H: "...Oh."
A: "What do you know about Lizards?"

>Hekapoo tells you there used to be a nation of Monsters
>They were a serious powerhouse in the magic world
>Not just because they had the largest army of magical creatures anyone had ever gone toe to toe with
>Not just because they somehow allied primordial races like giants, Ogres, Drakonoids, and Witches from all manner of dread underground horror corners
>...but their leaders
H: "Were invincible."
A: "Psh. The boasting of a Ligger. Everything has a weakness."
H: "They didn't for a long time. Eventually Queen moon taught herself a spell that could keep their leader from regenerating all his wounds."
A: "So she killed him?"
H: "Nah. Just blew his finger off."
A: "That sounds...controlled."
H: "Unimpressed?"
A: "Disgusted by weakness."
H: "Hey. She's the Queen now."
A: "Was this Lizard guy's name Toffee?"
H: "..."
A: "Cause he sent trouble my way."
H: "To earth?"
A: "To -my- part of earth."
H: "He could be making a move for the princess."
A: "Hey, let's not forget this is about m-"
H: "We'll find him. If he's out there we'll find him."
A: "I want his ass."
H: "Official business only, kid."
A: "Hey! You can't stonewall me outta official b-"
H: "I can and I will and I PROMISE it's for your own good leave this to the inter-dimensional freaks and royalty."
>Click

>Little
>Boyed
A: "BITCH!"

cont

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>>2533738
>>2533738

>How dare she?
A: "How DARE she!?"
>Muscles loves your anger
>His fist shakes as your nearly pulverize your phone
>You're not CHILD anymore
>You're a prince
A: "Soon I'll be a fucking KING!"
>You flop back down
>Look at your "throne"
>Of a beanbag chair
>Several soda and a fatass TV still flickering with meme compilations
>and see NO REASON you should be denied

A: "I'll deal with that fuckin' fanfiction bullshit ne-"
>Oh
>Your phone
>Is RIP

>So when you go back to school
>You glide through the halls
>Your mind snatching out everything that passes by
>Tests
>Girls
>Boys
>Tests
>Girl AND boys
>Useless
>Pointless
>Then you hit a blank spot
>You pause
>Feel at it
>Then turn

A: "Sabrina."
S: "Anon? H-hey! Did you need something f-from me?"
>You've been recalling Sabrina's existence more and more as of late
>She's mousy
>Indiscreet
>Even as you go over the mountain of scratched notebook papers you've amassed
>Lists
>Possibilities
A: "Shit, I gotta have Wondy check that coffin out."
S: "Anon?"
A: "Luna. Send some of the bone boyz to drag that coffin on Wondervon's desk. Make him...I dunno Science it or something so we can see inside."
L: "Ah, to Science."
S: "Anon. Hello?"
A: "What? What do you want?"
S: "Y-...you wanted something from me?"
A: "Oh yeah! Yeah."

>You think at her
A: "I want you to spy for me."
>You quickly and unquestioningly take the way she just tears up and shakes from foot to shoulder
>As a yes

>You instruct her to scan everyone's thoughts
>Just like you do to hers
>To find who's been writing that fanfiction
>If she gets a lead
>She's to tell you right away
>Brittany interrupted you before you could say thank you

Br: "Sab, c'mon. I've got three nail appointments and you need to meet the guy taking you to the dance."
>That bitch
>So busy she barely notices the girl helping her out
A: "Cunt."
>She didn't even ask Sabrina if she was ok
>Girl still looked sick as hell

cont

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>>2533744
>>2533744

L: "Ding ding."
>You look to your Mom
L: "That's your reminder alarm?"
A: "...fffooorr?"
L: "For your Dog's health condition."
A: "OH!"

>You portal to Mewni
>Strut out into the swamps where you first got Bow
>Walk right up the alchemist and blacksmith who told you so much about Drakes
>Then realize you didn't bring Bow at all
A: "Damnit damnit damnit damnit."
>You schwing home
>Find him digging a hole in the floor
>The stone floor
A: "Bad dog! Now c'mon we're going for a walk."
>Bow heard walk
>Say
>No
>More


>You meet a friendly Mewman Botanist named Nickodeemus
N: "Well, I've never seen anything like this."
A: "Fuck. That sounds bad."
N: "It -is- bad. Not knowing what this is means I can't safely treat it. Then again...I've never seen any of these plants before either."
A: "Wh-"
N: "What land did you say you were from?"
A: "Earth?"
N: "Ohohoho! Good one. Now really."
A: "No. Really..."
>He looks between you, your swamp drake and tiny floating mom
A: "I'm human."

>Nickodeemus provides you a salve to try and rub on the affected areas when you get a chance
>He also laughs out of there
N: "A Human! AAhaha! In mewni!? With scihihisssors!"

cont

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>>2533748
>>2533748

>You swing home
>Pound through your homework
>WHAMP
>Until a massive pamphlet of binded notes is dropped on your desk
>Muscles nearly misses your fifth decimal equation

A: "FUcK, JESUS!"
W: "Oh. I'm zorry. Did I interrupt?"
>Wondervon
>Your mole
>Not a spy
>Literally a mole
>He does engineering for you
A: "What is this?"
W: "Zeh plans."
A: "Plans."
W: "Also zeh cost. For the machine I vould have to 'Science up' and X-ray zat horrible metal box your SKELETONS CRUSHED MY DESK WITH!"

>He just took a tone
>You don't like that
>You don't even like your own tone half the time
>When your voice cracks
>Which, when you scream at him
>It does about three times

A: "WHat the FUCXK do you thiHnk you're DOING!?"
>Wondervon clucks while his yellow teeth clatter
W: "Strike a nerve?"
A: "You're wasting my TIME!"
>You snap your fingers
>A skeleton brings you your scissors
>A few snips and a pile of about $5k in 20s in on the table between you and Wondervon
>He counts it
W: "Zis isn't enough."
A: "What?"
>You check his plans
>Not just for an X-ray machine but a whole apparatus for...understanding enchantments
W: "Zafely extracting zem too."
>Huh
>That's pretty crafty
A: "How much?"
W: "Two Hundret Zousand."
>You need dosh
>Zerioush dosh
A: "We need mines."
W: "ZANK you! Finally!"
A: "We need slaves."
W: "Vat vas zat?"
A: "Subjects."
W: "...Zere's my race."
A: "..."
>Your eyes snap open
>The pen you were calculating pi with drops from your teeth
>It's already Tuesday
>Monday Part 2
>...and your ass
>Forgot

A: "Janna."

SESSION START!

What fucking do?

>>2533755
Martha! Go ask her about her goat sugar daddy. We need info on him before we can do anything with Janna.

>>2533755
Go to Martha, ask her how the deal with Goat man works, if there is nay cons and any specific risks besides walking funny.

Also i dont know, ask for a alternate source of power? Even if she dont use others, maybe she know some.

>>2533755
LETS GO LEARN ABOUT GOAT DEMON FUCKS

>>2533789
Pretty much this

>>2533755
no goat dick in Janna pls

>>2533755
>>2533825
This pls

>>2533755
Time be like the dirty murder hobo we are and go see if we need to shank a goat bitch.

Tell Wonderbread we'll get his funds in a bit, need to knick someone's acolyte

>>2533836
>>2533825
>>2533791
>>2533789
>>2533776
>>2533755
Should we consult with Jackie?

Her and Janna have been friends for way longer, and Jackie might be worried too bout her friend.

>>2533855
I think we should get more information about what Janna's even getting into before going to her or Jackie. That way if they have questions we might be able to answer them rather than just going "Uhhhh, I dunno I just went into this without really thinking."

>>2533855
>>2533855
Do it. Contact Jackie for help.

>>2533855
MAybe dropping a word with Jackie that Janna has to do hard heroine to do some of her magical bullshit might be a good idea

>>2533890
>>2533875
>>2533755
Yeah. Alright.

Thats fairvenough.

>>2533755
Like the others said, hit up the witch about the witch-shit, then let Jackie know what's a afoot

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>>2533776
>>2533789
>>2533791
>>2533815
>>2533825
>>2533836

Reactionary.
Impulsive.

So like you,

>You sprint out of the castle
>Eventually, once your cloak gets on you soar
>You crash out of the portal that links Luna's world to the human one
>The gaping maw taking up half of Echo Creek's boy's room wall

>Once back on earth you can use your scissors
>Tearing a hole between places as your blades have always done

SHRRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIpp!

>You step out of the portal near where you first met the Witch of Salem
>Martha was her name
>In life at least
>You built her a body out of phetuses
>Man, maybe you should examine some of your actions once in a while

A: "MARTHA!"
>No time for that now
>You've got a mostly nude 1800s woman in the woods to locate
>Wait...from the trees
>Is that?

A: "Music?"

https://youtu.be/QY8_nKejW-c

>It echoes from the dark corners
>Rolls on the rocks
>You can see a deer sprint in the opposite direction from it's source
>Behind you is the city of Salem proper
>Ahead
>Is the woods

A: "Did Martha pick up some modern tastes?"
L: "I suspect not."
>Luna forms on your shoulder in a spiral of pink mist
>Her tiny body weighs next to nothing
>Yet still, where she sits you feel a warmth

L: "Her kind don't change."
A: "So why the modern tunes."
L: "Her kind are also...universal in presence."


>The music is pounding from the woods
>There's a deadly chill all around you
>Seriously, this is way colder than you expected it to be
>Why does everything smell like pond scum?

>There's a road behind you that leads back to some of the bridges and outer homes of Salem

>There's a path directly into the trees

>There's an abandoned gravel path that looks overgrown as hell
>It leads up the short, but impossibly steep mountain

What do?

>>2533930
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ew-Of0o_Hy0
Follow the noise, where ever it goes!

>>2533930
Please contact Jackie first.

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>>2533930
the path is quite clear - let us take the gravel path.
Onwards and upwards!

Keep an eye out in case some witchy or goaty bullshit gets in our way.
Charge it and destroy it if some does.

>>2533930
Onwards, toward the woods, I guess.
Tread lightly, we don't wish to interrupt anything...until we do.

>>2533930
Portal, stick head through, ask Jackie
"Hey Girl, wanna help your besti with some witchy stuff? Also is she gonna be ok with a ton of drugs?"

>>2533930
I say we check out the gravel path; trees seem too obvious

>>2533930
>>2533980
This, then ONWARDS AND UPWARDS

>>2533930
i say we tip something over

>>2533930
>>2534007
Supporting this

>>2533930
Supporting gravel path... maybe we can get a vantage point on the forest below and whatevers making the noise.

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THE VOTES!

>Tip something over! (Brilliant)
2 votes

>Follow the SOUND!
2 votes

>Contact Jackie before you get smackie
2 votes

>The Gravel Path
>Onwards and upwards
4 votes

>Cranchn
>Munch
>Wackle
>Smack!
>Your march up the road is stern
>Almost resolute
>You catch yourself muttering as you walk
A: "Mrmrm Jackie outta know about this..."
>You glance at your phone
>Yep
>Still fucking RIPPETY dippety
>You've got some glass shards in Muscles' hands
>He wants you to tip one of the trees over
>You refuse
>Not only because it might alert someone to your presence
>...but it would probably drive the glass deeper
>You focus on the hand as long as possible before the steepness of the road draws you out

A: "Where..."
>Pat pat...
>Pat Crusnch
>The sounds of your feet
>Are so plain up here
>So audible
>You feel alone
>With the grey air
>With the black, slimy trees

>You can almost still hear that music way down below
>You hear some hilariously cringe-inducing wails from it too
>Sounds like a rabbit getting the finger from a crane

A: "Buncha-lunatics."
>You turn to keep heading onwards
>Upwards


>The path has ended

https://youtu.be/RWQpaA-XydU

>Ahead of you is a slight 'V' shaped sort of path
>Into trees that warp in their centers and claw into the rocks
>A nearby trash can, intended for what might have been public park goers at one time shuffles
>You turn
>Ready yourself for attack!
>It's a possum

P: "HEhhhhHH!"
>It hisses
>Then flops on it's side
L: "Oh, look."
>It twitches to make it's death seem believable
L: "A diplomat."

>You can feel something from the deeper woods higher up
>A stillness
>A presence

>Down below you can sense mania
>Smell bad weed and cigarettes

>The possum farts
>Then freezes, sucking the fart back as you turn to glare it for breaking character

>You think you hear a twig snap in the treeline


What do?

>>2533930

Let's go on and see that shit in the treeline

>>2534057
Turn out head towards where the twig snapped without moving our body all creepy like. See if we can add in a *crack* sound for added effect. Then go and check it out.

>>2534057
Tell them to come out
Because of course it's a person and not some other animal shitting in the woods

>>2534057
Fuck the treeline, we ONWARD AND UPWARD

>>2534057
Turn towards the sound and declare that you wish to speak with Martha. Send out a mental pulse to see what's in the forest around us.

>>2534057
MIND READ THE POSSUM?

OR WHATEVER IS ON THE TREELINE

>>2534057
>>2534092
This is fine too

>>2534057
mind read the possum
keep walking, whatever is following us probably knows better than to try anything

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>>2534057
keep the possum cause possums are cute as fuack
also, find out what that noise was

>>2534057
>Mind read possom
>If nothing is in there call out saying you wish to speak with Martha
>Send a mental ping out to see if they are simply shy.
>PORTAL. TO. JACKIE. PLEASE.

>>2534057
>>2534089
>>2534095
Fuck it, changing to checking out the treeline.
Make use of Mind Reading tho.
Also keep the Possum as a buddo

>>2534105
Yeah okay, this one

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https://youtu.be/3NFf3qdkK1I

>>2534101
>>2534095
>>2534084
>>2534091

A: "I got this."
>Oh do you?
>Of course you do
>You're Anon
>Master of messed up situations
>Also nature
>Fuck you, of course also nature
>When the twig snaps so does your neck
>Snapping toward the most logical offender

A: "YOU!"
>The possum
>Your mind coils into the creature's very depths
>His puny mind unfolds before you like a well fed, 16 year old oyster on prom night with her steady boyfriend of at least a year and a half
>He's struggled
>Watched his mother get eaten by a Rottweiler
>Won a fight with a raccoon once
>Never had rabies
>Never bit anybody
>Kind of likes it when people hold him by his tail a-

>You're carrying the possum before you even finish peeling his mind like an onion
L: "Anonymous, what is that?"
A: "This is a creature that eats trash and fears judgement."
>You bounce him in your arms
A: "...and he's mine now."

>You eye into the woods
A: "Just trees...just dirt and grass."
>You don't need anyone's help
>You're a big man
>A big
>Scary man
>With scary powers!

A: "I'm hear to speak with Martha!"
>You shout
>Your voice comes back from the trees
>Breathless
>Soul-less
>You take another step
>Vault over some roots

>As you continue the ground becomes ridged
>Muddy
>Your shoes don't scatter leaves here
>They splash slimy water up from the countless puddles beneath you

>The possum in your arm is still hissing
>His tails coils around your human wrist
>You pause
>As you suddenly realize that other than the slope of the mountain
>Telling which way you came
>You have no idea
>Any idea
>Where you are

A: "..."
>Why is the air here so hot?

>SHUNCK!
A: "AH!"

https://youtu.be/Mc_omTrOJfc

>The ground's suddenly opened
>You've fallen into the mountain
>Up to your hip
>Nearly past your waist
>Your right leg feels like it's being gnawed by the ground
>A red, pudding like slime splatters from the edges of the sinkhole you've collapsed

A: "FUCK! FUCK!"
>The trees overhead seem to be watching
>With no pity
>Or feeling at all
>Just stillness
>Your breath comes in too quickly for you to get calm

>The Possum is totally still


What do?

>>2534212
break free, for one.

Starwalk above the ground to potentially try to get our bearing?

comfort the possum the best an emotionally stunted boi can.

>>2534212
FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! FIRE! COMBUSTION! BURN THIS SHIT AND GET OUT! AAAAA!

>>2534212
POSSUMBRO NO

also DON'T PANIC and THINK THROUGH THIS SHIT

>>2534212
Eh, it’s just mud. See if we can’t extricate ourselves with Starwalk, if not have Muscles stretch out, grab the nearest solid ground, and pull us free.

>>2534212
supporting >>2534220

>>2534212
Remove self from the sinkhole we're in, calm the fuck down and remember, NO FEAR.

Star walking would help with getting free sure, just make not to star walk into a freaking tree with how much we're pulling. Also inform Martha if she doesn't get her ass out here we're going to start burning trees on her Milf Ass

>>2534212
STARWALK OUTTA THERE

COMBUST YOUR GNAWINGNESS IF NECESARY

And get possum outta there.

>>2534212
Can we also finally get Jackie here as well? I mean seriously dind't we say we were going to have Jackie come with us to get gud?

>>2534275
This isn't really an adventure. We're just going to go ask someone some questions and then probably leave.

>>2534212
Supporting this >>2534253 to pull us out. If we get air, utilize starwalk to slow our descent/monkey swing between trees and shit to avoid the ground.

>>2534212
Starwalk and pull us out with Muscles.

I bet jannas test is to sacrifice us to her goat god. Watch out and starwalk out while casting our flame touch

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>After enough panic
>You remember

A: "Oh wait..."

https://youtu.be/WbeEDE4XMEc

>You can fly
>Or float at least
>As you start to ascend possum bro panics
>FLight!? HE'S NOT WORTHY OF FLIGHT
A: "Shhh shshsh"
>You whisper into his ear
A: "You're worthy of whatever you want in this life."

>Shunk
>You've stopped...
>YOU'VE STOPPED!?

>Your ankle
>It's still in this hole
>You squirm
>Kick
>The Possum hisses at the hole
>Good hustle, Possum
>You can feel your skin breaking on jagged, glassy rocks

A: "Enough."
>KER-SNAP!
>Muscles snaps upward, stretching to reach the upper levels of the trees
>At first the branches don't hold
>He comes back holding a rolled up mess
>Of dark grey wood
>A femur
>Cobwebs
>The remains of an 80s windbreaker and a kite

A: "NYeh! THE 80S ended like 900 years ago!"
>You hurl the mess away
>Reach for a better hold
>Muscles has you now
>HERckack!
>You snap up like a rubber band


>Your ankle is a mess of cuts and deep black bruises
>Your shoe has a hole in the toes
>Your pant leg is covered in dirt and reddish slime

A: "Martha! Martha you MAGIC AXE WOUND! Get out here or I'm gonna-AUUGHh!"
>Your eyes water on that last inhalation
>You have to close them because of the involuntary gag that pulls on your throat

>The hole
>Where you leg caved in the ground
>It stinks
>Like REALLY stinks
>The wind slowly pushing from it smells like the sour shits of a sick day
>Like that ward of the hospital you send grandparents to die quietly and divide up the estate
>While you swing from the moss covered tree, disrespecting the forest's peace you notice something

>The air up here is much less hot
>The shadows of the trees that are cost onto the earth
>Seem deeper
>Richer
>Filled out


>You wish you had brought something to clean the wounds on your ankle

ANON HAS TAKEN 3 DAMAGE

>Jackie would have something
A: "NMMFM! No! No I don't NEED to be fuckin' baby sat!"
>You kick the blood off
>Glare around at the woods

A: "MARTHA! MARTHA!"
L: "Why are you shouting?"
>You look at Luna
L: "Why are you shouting when you can magically scream?"

>She's right, you know
>This area is spooky beyond belief
>The trees higher up the mountain look even thicker
>With less even ground
>The world below is orderly but empty and vast
>The wind is so cold against you up here in the air
>Your new Possum is hanging from your wrist, scrabbling
>The Hole below blasts steam for a second
>Sending a glove covered in the same red slime out into the open

What do?

>>2534431
Cover our new possum fren's ears and then mind scream for MARTHA TO GET HER STANKY ASS OUT HERE!

>>2534442
>>2534431
supporting

>>2534431
>>2534442
Supporting

>>2534442
the mindscream probably won't effect him since he's just a possum so there's no need to cover his ears
but do it anyway
supporting

>>2534431
Mind scream to cancel spell effects and call for Martha.
Also... Stinks of what? simply gargbage? Or the UNDEAD? Animal, Insect, Human... perhaps we can get a small mob to assist us... or additional info on what caused them their demise.

>>2534431
Insert mental scream spell.exe
Insert text.
Martha god damn it and goat damn it you really need to get a telephone or something so I dont' have to trump through your swamp to get a freakin courtesy call done.

As an aside please thank Luna for reminding us of our dumb silliness

>>2534431
>Mind Scream for Martha
>BfB the gaping asshole that almost swallowed us
>threaten to throw fire right into it

>>2534431
>>2534472
this but actually throw fire into it

it deserves nothing but hate

>>2534431
REEEEE for Martha and commit maximum violence unto the hole

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>Your mind coils in on itself
>Your teeth slice into your lips
>You shake
>The tree shudders
>Possum looks concerned for it's safety and the safety of others
>The bark near your ears begins to peel
>Spite
>Anger
>Resolute disgust
>All these feelings interact and amplify

>The slime on your leg turns to jelly
>The air in your lungs burns like Lysol
>Your lungs seal against the world as the stench
>That stench
>Amplifies

A: " https://youtu.be/clDBJKcmfvE?t=2 "

>Your mind SHOUTS HATE
>CRUELTY
>DISGUST

>A: "MARTHA YOU MAGIC MUFF DIVING FARM ANIMAL SUCCOR SEEKING CUNT! YOU DIDN'T ANSWER WHEN I CALLED SO NOW THAT I'VE RESPECTED YOUR PRIVACY BY KNOCKING -AND-

>You have to pause
>You pant
>What leaves are on the trees are now crumpling
>Turning to sticky dust
>Possum licks some off of your cheek
>He coughs it up as you continue

A: " https://youtu.be/pEoh1cG2PGI "

A: "NOW I'M ASSERTING MY AUTHORITY AS THE GUY YOU OWE BY COMING IN ANYWAYS! GET OVER HERE. OR TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE. NOW."

>THWOOOm!
>A beam of light pierces your vision

M: "I'm in the old cathedral. With some visitors. Come. Do not disturb my children any longer."

>The cathe-
>Oh
>Right
>The church she was buried at


A: "Her children? All Martha's children are spooky ghost and dirt monsters they can't be-"

>CRAHCH
>You look down

>Pic Fucking related has super jumped from the 5-inch wide hole which is now a gaping crater of bloody humanoid remains splattered around in a rocky mother-of-pearl lined puss pocket

>It's inches from your face
>You smell dirt, pine, and Menstruation
>You've broken all the spells around you
>Even the ones that kept you safe

>Nice job, Anonymous

>Now.

What do?

>>2534576
Go to Martha now, fly out of that bois range.

>>2534576
Teleport to said cathedral

>>2534576
*TELEPORTS BEHIND MARTHA*

>>2534576
>>2534618
this, specifically like this

>>2534606
>>2534618
I can agree with teleporting behind Martha.

>>2534607
>>2534618
>even the ones that keep you safe
Question is if we're in combat now. If so, Scissoring will lead to unexpected locations.

>>2534576
Raise dead from the hole.

>>2534576
>>2534650

>>2534667
oh, it's alive?
Let's kill it, then go to Martha's.
It violated the NAP first, after all.

Engage Combustion and wipe it the fuck out.

>>2534618

Since I'm declared the resident edgefag, I gotta support this

>>2534576
Starwalk past the threeline into the clear sky.

Look for the cemetery without any trees to block your view.

>>2534750
Or, well, yeah, Just do >>2534618

can we also say nothing personnel martha?

>>2534870

We're not killing her. Yet anyways

>>2534870
>>2534881
Calm down, yeesh. Martha has not done anything to Janna she didn't agree to as far as we are aware.

>Just walk in without being a spaz for once.

>>2534918
Please.

>>2534910

I said yet anon, not killing her or killing her is dependent on what we find

>>2534918

>Not being a spaz
>Anon

Are you reading the same quest as me?

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>>2534576
>>2534576

>You look at this
>All this
>The gore
>The winding roots
>This...thing staring at you like you're a marshmallow on the end of a burnt stick
>You extend your neck
A: "Nope."

>You whip out your scissors
>Spin them like a cowboy
A: "I ain't killin' kids until I'm at least in my 20s and convinced I'm doing the right thing."

>SHHHHHHHHRRRRRRIIIP

https://youtu.be/SWsYG_pE76o

>You step out of the portal
>Ankle stinging
>Face covered in soot and ash and leaves
>Pants covered in tomato flesh lookin' slime
>Possum in hand

???: "OH GOD!"
???: "He's REAL!"

>To the sound of teenage girl screams
A: "What th-"
>Some goth chicks are in here
>5 by your quick count
>You look down
>Sure enough
>Martha
>Looking up at you
>Her hair's plastered to her head and neck
>Her whole body is slick with sweat
>You can tell

>Cause her stank ass is naked and hairy as an angus cow
>Along with of course the obvious
>She's in midst of childbirth

M: "Hello."
A: "JESUS, WHYAT?!"
>You scream
>Muscles is one million dicks
>Possum screams

???: "Please. Take me next."
>One of the goth girls has approached you
>She's yanking at her 'Dirt Mother' shirt to try and get undressed
>She is not of a healthy BMI
>Her torn jeans reveal jiggling thighs that are way too out in the open for someone this far away from their teens

A: "Nothin' personal."
>You sniff
>Push her back with a gravity spell
A: "MMmmbut I think I'm better than the 'fat one' ."

>A scrawny girl comes up to you
>Face grim
GG: "She is a fucking QUEEN you virgin filth."
>Oh
>Nevermind
>It's a man
>A weak one

M: "Can I help you, Anonymous?"
A: "Y-yeah. I have some questions. Pretty serious o-"
M: "OOOUAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!"
>Martha screams again
>Black fluid spurts out of her practically clothed -in-fur body onto the tiles of the church
>You hear some wood creak
>You look up
>A wooden statue of some priest is frowning at the scene
>Martha twitches and flatulates
>His head is spattered in her life goo

cont

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>>2535120
>>2535120

>The screaming wouldn't be so bad
>If all the goth chicks weren't screaming with her
A: "Is that nessecary?"
M: "No. They believe it communes them with my pain."
A: "Does it?"
M: "No."
A: "Look. I need to know what the ahhgh!"
>You clamp your face with Muscles
>Who is set aquiver from all you've seen today
>The miracle of birth
>The results of said miracle

>Fat goth chick thighs
>Witch tiddies
>Man
>What a time

>The smell is back is your only issue
>In full force
>You peek out of your fingers to see Martha wobbling up onto her feet

A: "Damn, bitch. You live like this?"
M: "Indeed. All life."
>She squats
>Turns her shoulders purple with how hard she squeezes
M: "LIVES...LIKE THIS-"
A: "Enough!"
>You spin her around
>Push the White Knight trap-goth boy into a puddle of blackened menstrual fluid

A: "I wanna know what Janna's getting into. If she's got options. Cause no offense but..."
>You motion to Martha
A: "All this."
>Then gag alittle
A: "Can't be healthy."
M: "You cannot make her choices for her."
A: "No but I can damn sure keep people from giving her bad options."

>Muscles curls his fingers
>They crack like the snaps of a chicken's neck

A: "Now give me some answers. So I can get the fuck up outta here away from your misguided youths. Your semi-cannibal children and that damn STENCH!"

FG: "Please. I want to bear the fruits of the forest. The world of man is nothing to me, please! Take me!"
A: "I thought I told you, Ms. Slam Pig. EN. OH. NO!"
M: "She was not talking to you."

>It takes you a moment
>Before you snap backwards
>Before the shadows that fill the entirety of the back of the church seem to deepen
>Into wispy black fur
>When the stone cracks from the step of cloven feet
>When the light of portable lanterns and trash fires dies down to be replaced by yellow, dead yet piercing eyes

>A long, awful neck stretches out from the dark
>Lowering a face that's all too close to human at you
>Oh by all darkness
>When it breathes
>The smell

M: "Disciple of the Pink. Meet the father of my children. My patron. My god."
>The creature opens it's lips
>Revealing curled, lion-like teeth where a goat's should be

???: "I am the dark Father."
>It speaks without a single human gesture of it's mouth

???: "You must be The End."


SESSION PAUSE!

SESSION RESUMES TOMORROW! 6:00PM US CENTRAL TIME!

Stay afloat
Don't lose your goat

love,
Quest

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>>2535123
>>2535123

A few more images of our lovely host.
Along with some friendly links.

The twitter
https://twitter.com/StarVsQuest

The Sheets

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1R66kWytq_Ar3zyEA8R05DYJT0NNJiYT5uKAD4OdFOY0/edit?usp=sharing

(Links to other documents inside this one)

The tip bucket (now with stretch goals)
https://www.patreon.com/user?u=5454620


stay blesst
still loved
by Quest

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>>2535154

>>2535123
Fitting name for us

>>2535123
>???: "You must be The End."
Finally, someone who GETS IT! And you must be "The Horned One."

>>2535123

Seems Lovecraft got wrong on the Mother of a Thousand Young bit.

>>2535123
Sup goat daddy. Maybe get him a couple hundred boxes of breath mints, see if we can make a dent in that rancid breath of his. Also, yeah, no, I think Janna’s probably not gonna be super into all...uh...this. There’s cool witchcraft and rituals and all that jazz, and then there’s having sex with a giant bipedal goat and bearing it’s hideous, malformed children. He seems fairly courteous, at least.

>>2535123
Well, at least he's not outright antagonism. And he seems to recognize us as someone worthy of a title at the least. Whats his angle? Just more children and territory, like the sea troll?

>>2535123
>Inform him that we'd kindly prefer he doesn't immediately ignore us for our Mom; we're the one trying to talk to him after all, not her

>>2535360
What?

>>2535363
Dude. She's The End.
bcuz she literally ENDED practically an entire reality. That, and it's not unlikely that to the eyes of many powerful entities, she's the more prominent individual between Anon and her.

Why would WE be called The End? What have WE ended?

>>2535376
Existence itself when we kicked Fate's teeth in. Also, the flow of the conversation was directed to us. Not only that, but I'm fairly sure Luna's avatar isn't even here so what he fuck would be he talking to? Even then, sure she did all that but how would he know? That all happened in another universe. No one in this universe knows besides us and Glossaryck. Not even Omnitraxus knew and he was the space-time/multiverse guy.

It really doesn't make sense that he'd be addressing her instead of us when Martha introduced him to us. You don't be introduced to someones kid then say "hello kid X's mother" that's just weird and doesn't flow well.

>>2535360
why assume he's not referring to us?

>>2535426
Because he didn't call us the Disciple of the Pink like Martha did.

Something to handle when we get back

>You quickly and unquestioningly take the way she just tears up and shakes from foot to shoulder

Britt is forcing Sabrina into shit she doesnt want because sabrina is a doormat. That shot is now stuff about having a boyfriend and going to prom. Sabrina obviously feels like she has no control over her life and anon just rolled up and used her like she gets used by everyone else.

We need to take a second while running around like a spazz and tell her that she is special and that we appreciate her as a friend and that she can say no and that if she needs help being her own person we have a safe place in our castle where she is beholden to no one.

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>>2537123
I do want to do something nice for Sab for helping us out. Don't wanna feel like we're using her either.

If we could also get her to be more assertive and independent from Britt that'd be cool too, though I've no idea how we could do that.

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SESSION START!

https://youtu.be/Z9U5NKn5Yes

>Are you still Anon?
>Are you?
>Anonymous McMoot
>He wasn't the kind of person to give this much of a shit
>Was he?
>Before you were nothing
>Now, not only are you important
>To at least -one- person in this fetid world.
>You're powerful
>You're elevating others to the same status
>Or you tried at least
>You found a human
>Martha Dugood
>Who found herself an avenue for strength
>At the very least a way to obtain magical abilities

>All she had to do was acquiesce something to another, higher power
>So you sent a friend
>Janna Ordonia
>To this woman
>To learn her higher power
>It's had some benefits
>Janna's gained much greater control of the psionic portion of her mind
>Able to two-way communicate
>Able to read the thoughts and motives of the unguarded
>The spells however
>The spells themselves elude her
>She is missing a piece to her power
>The creature providing these "gifts" is one known as the Dark Father
>Supposedly she must surrender to his 'ministrations' in order to achieve the next level

>Martha has utterly given in to this creature
>As a result, she's powerful enough to birth and untold number of demi-god spawn
>Conceal them in illusion magic
>Even sustain the life of a polluted, old growth forest on the outskirts of Salem
>Who knows how many corpses litter this mountain where they sleep

>Her body is a temple to his will
>Her Obsession seems to fuel her powers
>That is a not a fate you can tolerate for your friend

>You've come to confront this being
>Who has been so kind as appear before you
>He is a behemoth
>An affront to natural order
>With his squashed, man-like goatish face
>His curtains of billowing black fur
>Those eyes
>That break through everything they behold
>Yet never seem to properly blink

>This is the Horned one

HO: "You must be...the end."

>His lips curl downward
>They don't move when he 'speaks'

???: "Please! OH DARK FATHER TAKE ME! TAKE ME PL-"

>He raises his right hand at the one screaming for his attention
>A normal, uninitiated girl
>Who's body, from the looks of the holes in her metal band logo covered clothing is a ruin
>Her desperate pleas become silent as the palm levels her way
>She continues to plead, unaware no one can hear her

Ho: "They get hysterical, at times. When they see their opportunity."
>His craning neck crunches as he turns back to you
Ho: "Well..."
A: "I-"
Ho: "For what purpose do you seek this audience with me?"

>You are standing at the top of a church steeple
>A crowd of ignorant goths is behind you
>One of which really wants that goat dick
>Martha is there as well
>Naked and still giving birth

>The Horned One's eyes are upon you


What do?