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04/15/11(Fri)12:47 No.14603069Journal Log: Day 239 How did it come to this? Less then a year ago I was just a customer service rep for state run insurance bullshit program. I'd wake up in the morning, eat a fatty breakfast, drive to work and then sit in a cubical surrounded by a team of 10 others, who themselves were surrounded by 10 other teams, all pissing about on the phone helping assholes who can't be assed to pay their already cheap insurance and have no end of stupid problems. I'd be on the phone all day feeling my sanity slip away. Now here I am, stranded on a hostile alien world, wearing leather body armor and armed to the teeth, blood splattered and holding a bloody sword over a dead yowler and I still feel my sanity slipping away. I guess the only peace I'll get is when I'm dead. So yea, a yowler popped out of the underbrush today and came charging at me and two others. It seemed pretty damned sure of itself until it made eye contact and realized it was dealing with another apex predator. My two companions managed to hit it twice with arrows and I disemboweled the fucker with my blade. Then I helped one of the rangers cut it up into usable parts. Skin, meat, bone, trophy claws. I didn't feel scared, I didn't feel surprise, I didn't feel elation. I feel cold. I had a long conversation with the two others in my patrol group a bit later in the day about it. We're all handling the stress differently. One is keeping oblivious to it, stuffing it all away and focusing on the here and now and hoping that the sides of that bottle are strong enough not to crack. The other is shoving it all into a religion he didn't even believe in back home. Anyways, there's a big owod crossover larp going on town tonight. I'm going to go see it and then hit a bar. |